


It's Still You

by starshooter



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: A lot of cursing, Be nice please, Fluff, Gen, I don't know what I'm doing, Medical Jargon, Other, Science Stuff, Slow Burn, sort of sans/chara but not exactly - Freeform, technically OC, thing are are the opposite of fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-05-04 03:54:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 47
Words: 117,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5319449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starshooter/pseuds/starshooter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even after the barrier was broken and monsters returned to the surface, life continued forward. </p><p>Things seemed to be going your way. A great university. A new research position. But not everything is so simple in a world where magic is real. Things are not always as they seem. Can you trust what's inside? Can you believe in your own soul?</p><p>Who will you become?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lab Assistant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot believe I am posting this.
> 
> (Don't search the derm stuff if you're squeamish, it's gross)

You remembered the day that the monsters arrived. Or rather, they bloomed forth from along the expanse of small mountains about five years ago. Everyone knew the legends about the creatures who lost to humans in a magical war. Their punishment was to forever live under the great Mt. Ebott, sealed by a magical barrier. The only indication that this could even be remotely true was the fact that anyone who went into Mt. Ebott never returned. But that should have been it. A legend. 

They never returned, except for the child named Frisk. They couldn’t have even been ten years old when they returned, a slew of monsters in tow. No one could believe how they had survived, and that human in this day and age could use magic to any degree. There was backlash. There was change. It was a hard time. More than anything, it was a revelation and the driving force to encourage monsters to live among humans. 

If you have something to give, people will take it, you remember thinking at the time. 

It was a tough transition. Many of the monsters chose to stay close to Mt. Ebott. It was simpler that way. You happened to live in a particularly good area for monsters to settle. 

You worked hard to be welcoming. But there was only so much you could learn so quickly. Monsters were not like humans. Monsters weren’t even like other monsters. Magic was their only common denominator. They were just as different from each other as they were from you. They also didn’t know much about humans except from legends. Some people worked hard to help. Others were not so kind. 

But time moves forward. Some prejudice stays and some goes. People and monsters learn to live with what happens around them. That’s what makes this world so unique. If you don’t adapt, you never move forward. And if you don’t move forward, it tears you apart. 

With time, you grew older. You moved away and starting attending the university in the city. Science took over your education without you realizing, becoming the main focus. Biology, infact. At the start of your junior year you were offered a lab position at the medical division, paid. 

This is where we start. 

“Good news!” You were waiting at the front desk in the medical sciences building. It was foreign to you, slightly offset from the main campus, far enough that you had to drive. It was an unspoken rule that undergrads did not go in. The medical professional students didn’t enjoy overzealous distractions or so you’ve heard. “I’ve got your research position assignment right here.” You recognized the clerk from some of your classes. Blonde, bouncy, all smiles. 

You smiled back as you gripped the printouts in your hand. You would be working with Dr. Alphys, as you already knew from the acceptance email, but that was it. The room was on the third floor but the building was large. You weren’t even sure where the elevator was and the clerk was already on the phone with someone. A student was hunched into the floor, settled into her oversized hoodie. You wondered how long she had been in the building. She probably knew it pretty well then. 

“Excuse me…” You felt uncharacteristically timid. 

“Hmm?” The student picked their head up, almost like they were in a daze. “Oh hi! I’ve never seen you around here. You looking for something?” Ah, these creatures aren’t as scary as you were lead to believe. 

“Yes, actually. I’m the new research assistant for Dr. Alphys, do you know where the lab is?” You showed the student the room number, but she started laughing. She stood up, setting all of her study material on a side table. 

“No way, you’re the one working for Dr. Alphys? She’s been so excited all week! Her lab just got enough funding for an assistant. She does awesome stuff. I’ll take you up there!” You were beaming. This was already turning out to be better than you expected. 

“I’m Aria by the way. Second year medical student.” Aria was extremely animated, giving your hand a firm shake. The elevator made an odd whirring noise. 

“I’m…” You tried to introduce yourself but the elevator buzzed when you hit your floor. Aria sped from the door, ushering for you to come with her. You were glad Aria was accompanying you, because the research floor was a twisted maze of hallways and doors. You had to speed walk to keep up. Aria was at least 5 inches taller than you. 

“You know your way around really well.” 

“I wander when I’m bored. Plus, I like visiting everyone. Alphys’ lab is a ton of a fun, not sure if I’d want to work there though. You gotta worry about her co-worker mostly.” Aria winked as she opened the only door in the hallways that metal plated. 

The lab was enormous. It expanded over two floors, giant machines buzzing with electricity. Electric conducting tubes lined the walls flashing in different colored, sparkling lights. Most of the machinery was plated in shimmering chrome. Some it resembled medical equipment like MRI machines and bone scanners, while others were completely alien with exposed wire and tubing snaking all over the floor and up the walls. 

“Well if it isn’t the comeback kid?” A voice laughed from the second floor. 

“Gee Sans,” Aria folded her hands over her chest, purposefully trying to sound girly and smitten. “You know it just too much to for me to keep away. Also, don’t call me that.” Aria responded, following her maiden antics by flicking off the unknown body. 

“I knew it. Couldn’t get enough of me, huh? You were only here an hour ago.” Walking down the stairs was a completely sentient, walking, talking, kind of unprofessionally dressed topped with a disheveled lab coat, skeleton. 

“Don’t flatter yourself. I’m on a delivery. Meet Alphys’ new assistant.” Aria pushed you forward. You must have looked like a scared freshman, the way you were gripped the life out of your printouts, and the fact that Sans was eyeing you up, smiling, but looking none too impressed with you. 

Sans was just a bit taller than you, which wasn’t saying much. You nervously kept darting your eyes to the ground and back to Sans. Interacting with monsters was nothing new for you, but the pin pricks of lights in Sans’ eyes boring into you made you uncomfortable, his smile slowly started to turn down. Aria made something akin to a huffing noise. “Well, are the two of you just going to stand there being weird, or is someone gonna get Alphys?”

“O-oh! Yes, I’m right here! I’m so sorry for being late! I simply couldn’t leave until I saw the results from the centrifuge.” Dr. Alphys, leader of groundbreaking research on the medical health of monsters was a monster. You wanted to punch yourself in the face. Of course she would be a monster. How stupid could you be not to realize. She scurried through a metal archway, round glasses almost sliding off her snout. She was almost quite small, but very dinosaur like with golden colored scales. She was very sweet looking though. 

“I’m so glad to have you here!” Dr. Alphys was practically glowing as she vigorously shook your hand. She was shaking a little bit, but was strong for someone so stout. 

“I, I’m so excited to get to work with you! Thank you choosing me to work here!” You were kind of shouting in response to her nervous energy. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Sans and Aria trying to hold in laughter. 

“A perfect match!” Aria says through the hand trying to cover her laugh. She straightens up and smiles. “Anyways, I’ve got derm to learn and as much as I’d rather hang around here, I need to go throw up about some mycetoma and bullous impetigo.” She reaches around your shoulders, pulling you in. “And if you ever feel like distracting someone, come find me. I’m always around, anywhere on the first floor or the anatomy lab. TA privileges.” 

“If you learn some anatomy so bad…” Sans starts, but Aria knocks him in the head with her elbow. 

“I’d rather hang around with those deadbeats than go anywhere near you. See ya later!” Aria shoots finger guns before she leaves. 

Dr. Alphys smiles meekly. “Aria can be a lot to handle, but she’s very nice. She’s been a good friend.” You nod in agreement. 

“W-well, you’ve already met Sans.” He waves, still with that grin plastered onto his face. You crack half a smile to show, yeah you get it. He’s supposed to be funny. “I-I’m Alphys, you don’t have to call me doctor. As I’m sure you know,” Alphys starts to lead you through the lab. “Monsters are fundamentally different than humans. Bodily injury to monsters can be devastating. If-if we’re injured to badly, we can turn to nothing but dust.” Her voice is solemn. 

“B-but! I’ve been working on ways to treat monsters using medicine and magic t-together! Not much is known about monster physiology, but it’s coming along. Perfecting this may save a lot of lives in the future.” She shows you a small vial of what you assume to be viscous, liquefied magic. It’s tinted yellow. “I was hoping to have a human working with us. I think this will greatly h-help.” 

Alphys goes on to explain what your duties will be while you’re working. Nothing seems too complicated. It’s similar to working in a chemistry lab, except the magic part which worries you a little bit. Still early in the process, Alphys asks Sans to help you out. You aren’t exactly thrilled at the prospect. 

In the middle of attempting to pipette a few millimeters of orangey-pink magic to mix with some raw bone marrow, Sans decides it’s a good time for a conversation. “So, why’d you pick to apply for this lab? Most humans aren’t quite on the bandwagon yet for monster healthcare.” He eyes you, maybe suspiciously? You can’t tell, but the fact he makes facial expressions at all already goes against any human physiology you’ve learned. Then again, he wasn’t a human skeleton. 

“I’ve always thought monsters were…interesting.” You scrunch your face up. That’s not the word you wanted to use, but you can’t think of anything else. “Besides, it’s going to happen sooner or later. Why not learn about it while it’s in the process of making history?” Shit, you took too much of the magic. It rips through the marrow sample, disappearing into a ball of sparkling smoke. Your skin crawls a little bit. 

“Alphys is gonna have a bone to pick with you.” You whip your head over. You realize by his facial expression, still so weird, Sans is kidding. You know you’re frowning, but you’re not use to this type of environment. It’s like he’s trying to get under your skin, watching every little thing you do, waiting for you to…you aren’t even sure what. Messing up is normal in research. What else could it be?

When it’s finally time to leave the lab, you rush out into the hallway after a quick goodbye and thank you to Alphys. You don’t say anything to Sans. 

As you’re headed down to the lobby, you see what must be the library. The wall is mostly glass and you can see Aria was planted at a large desk with another person, neither speaking to each other, both scribbling away. She picked up her head and spotted you, giving you a quick gave, followed by a gesture to wait where you were. 

“Hey,” She pushed open the glass door. “How was it?” 

You kicked at the ground. “It was alright. Super cool, but I don’t think Sans likes me very much.” You admitted. You hoped that was okay to say, since Aria and Sans seemed like they were fairly close. 

“Really? That’s surprising. He’s usually on his best behavior for cute girls like you.” Aria was kind of speaking to herself, and didn’t notice you flush and shrink back. “Either way, if he’s being an ass let me know. Here.” Aria hands off her phone to you. “Put your number in, I’ll send you a text with mine.” 

After punching in the numbers, Aria takes it back and shakes with quiet laughter. “Man, am I dumb or what? I never actually caught your name. Well, now I won’t forget it.” She grins ear to ear. At least someone in the building was looking out for you. 

Aria waves as you as you walk out of the front door, the sky already turning to night. 

“See you later, Chara!”


	2. Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the positive response! It makes it easier to keep this going. 
> 
> There is a lot of drinking in this chapter, just FYI. It affects story line, sorry.
> 
> Like the story? Got questions?  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/

Sans finally leaves you alone. The first few times you worked, he was never far, always glaring at the back of your head or pointing out every mistake you made in form of a joke. It had been more intermittent, but you didn’t see him at all that day. You were well into the third week of you working in the lab, it was about time he backed off.

It wasn’t all bad though. You only worked three times a week, but had managed to find with the right concentrations of aspirin powder and magic of animal type monsters, they would bind to it forming a hybrid type chemical similar to the everyday painkiller. At least that’s what you thought it might do when you gave your report to Alyphs. She was absolutely ecstatic something had actually bonded to anything.

That was the thing with magic. It didn’t follow any chemical mechanisms of any substance. Everything was just a system of trial and error. It helped that Alyphs was always so enthusiastic about it, but also that she seemed to have answer for everything. For being in the human world such a short time, she sure knew her ins and outs.

It wasn’t until today that you even got to see Aria again. You had been texting back and forth fairly often. Contrary her overzealous personality, Aria was extremely serious about her studies and her responsibilities. She said she wouldn’t have the time to hang out until after her exam was over, which was today.

You waved her down from the testing center to where you were in the lobby. Aria popped both of her shoulders and she strolled over. “If it isn’t my favorite forlorn lab tech?” She dropped herself in the seat across from you.

“Yep.” You half-smiled. “How was your exam?”

“I don’t wanna talk about.” Aria rolled her eyes. “You know it one minute, you get to the test and bam, you can’t even remember how to write your own name. I still passed though. Barely…Sans still being weird?” She wrinkled her nose in disapproval. Aria was not happy that Sans was acting the way he was toward you. They had apparently been friends for a long time, how long you weren’t sure since monsters hadn’t been around all that long, and she said he was usually extremely chill and just made ridiculous puns and jokes all the time. With you it was just glares and jokes to laugh at you, not with you. He always looked tense.

“Eh…yeah.” You fiddled with your hands. “He stopped hanging around me though. I can work in peace.” Your laugh was very half-hearted. Aria released a frustrated sigh. “I asked him about it a few days ago, he said he had no idea what you were talking about. Sans can’t lie worth shit.” Aria grumbled into her hands.

“I’m just pissed because he’s usually so easy to get along with. Maybe he likes you.” Aria narrows her eyes and raise her eyebrows suggestively.

“If that was a question on your test, you for sure got it wrong.” You respond. Aria snickered.

“I’m pretty sure he hates my guts.”

Aria shrugs. “Hate is practically the same thing as love, you know?”

You didn’t get a chance to respond. “Hey Aria, you coming? We’re going to lunch!” Another student calls over from a group.

“Wanna come?” Aria gets up, and tugs at your shoulder a little bit. You give her a worried glance. “They won’t mind?”

“Hell no. Besides, you need to have some fun, huh?”

You’re convinced.

Yet now you aren’t so sure. You find yourself sitting on a huge couch at a party next to one of Aria’s friends who’s trying to explain how lupus is “the great imitator” of diseases, and failing due to their drunken state. You give her sympathetic nods and correct her words. She thanks you and tells you that you’re very smart and very pretty. At least they’re nice.

You had been to plenty of college parties before, but this was different. Everyone knew each other. Conversation ranged from what to drink to the ethics of life support. It was weird. Aria popped over the edge of the couch, her friend squealing in surprise. “It’s hot in here.” She states, looking uninterested as her friend tries to pull her on the couch.

“Chara, let’s go outside. You stay here and don’t try walking.” She motions to her friend, who just giggles a response. “HEY!” Aria shouts from the couch. A guy pokes his head from around the kitchen entry way. “MAKE SURE SHE STAYS PUT.” She receives a thumbs up and is pleased enough to lead you out to the backyard.

By the time you get outside, Aria is perched on the tabletop of a set of wooden patio furniture, her phone lighting up her facial features, which are trained intensely on whatever she’s doing. You’re relieved at the soft hum of a few other people around you glad to be away from the erratic noise inside.

You approach her, confused. “Aria, what are you-“ She shoots her hand up before her head, accidently pushing you back a few steps.

“Sorry.” She presses her teeth together, looking sheepish. “Oh, it’s ringing. Stay quiet.”

She has the phone on speaker. The line on the other end picks up.

_“Hello?”_

“What’s up you crap bag of bones?”

You freeze. “Aria,” You whisper, concerned. “Why are you calling Sans?” She waves you off.

_“Seriously Aria? You drunk?”_

“Not nearly. You wanna come hang out? Same house as last time.”

 _“Feeling bonely without me?”_ He laughs at his own pun. You frown. He sounds so much…nicer than what you’re used to.

“Shut up. You coming or not?”

_“Sure. I’m not doing anything better with my time.”_

“Bring Undyne and Alyphs!” Aria shrieks, shaking the table. You give her and a look, and Aria responds with a thumbs up. You only knew Undyne by name and that she was Alyphs’ girlfriend.

_“Hell no. Undyne is going to destroy the house. Plus I’ve got to bring Pap if I’m bringing her.”_

“Well the rest of us are already in hell, so you might as well invite her. Just keep her out of the kitchen. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed but everyone loves Papyrus. I see no issue.”

Sans laughs on the other line, it’s genuine. You’ve never heard it before. He agrees and says he’ll be there within the hour.

“Why exactly did you do that?” You huff. I mean, you don’t have any right to say no, but still.

Her answer is blunt. “Because I want answers, and so do you.” Her answer is also right. You do want to know why Sans seems to hate you so much. “We still have time though.” Her smile curls at the end.

“For what?”

“MORE SHOTS!” Aria yells into the open door, as she drags you inside. You can hear a deep voice cheer in response. This was going to be a long night.

You feel queasy as you sit on the couch. You for at least drunk now, sitting with your cup of water.

“Chara, I’m so sorry. I forgot how small you are.” Aria apologizes, hands pressed together. Aria, being so much taller than you and made of lean muscle drank toe for toe with one of the biggest guys there and was still relatively functional. You, on the other hand, took two shots and knew you were done for.

“S’okay.” The words bubble from your mouth. “I’m having fun.” You smile as you take another big gulp of water. You actually hadn’t expect it, but you really were having a good time. No one was pushing you to do anything, you just happen to be making questionable choices.

“PAPYRUS!” A voice squeals from the entry way. A few people scuttle by, looking excited.  

“Looks like the party finally got here.” Aria ruffles your hair, which you pull your head away from. She gets up to walk to the foyer. You trudge behind.

Even though you were verbally prepared, you were still caught off by what you saw. You immediately see Alyphs, looking super sweet in a polka dot dress, and Sans, who clearly put forth zero effort into getting ready.

The other two are new. The first is a fish woman, statuesque with aqua colored scales. She’s ripped to the moon and back. You figure that must be Undyne. The other is another skeleton. This one though is much closer to regular human anatomy than Sans, if not a bit tall. That must be Papyrus. They’re both dressed kind of stylish.

People are welcoming them, no problem. They all seem to know the entire group. Aria told you Papyrus and Undyne tended to hang around a lot during her first year, but you also suppose it must be true that the more educated the people, the less prejudice they show. You silently wished it was more like this everywhere.

Sans sees you hovering near the stairs. You look away and make a note to go back to living room but you stumble slightly. He’s still watching you as you haphazardly try to squeeze past two guys, but you almost get knocked over. And by almost, you mean someone caught you. You expect to see Aria standing behind you, but she’s in front of Undyne and Alyphs completely unaware of your actions.

Instead, Sans pushes you back onto your feet, looking unimpressed. “Thanks.” You mutter, he nods and then walks back to where Papyrus is. You can feel your face burning but you aren’t sure if it’s embarrassment or tequila. You wonder why you had it when you don’t even like tequila.

“You humans and your intoxicating elixir! Oh no, none for me! Sans’ say it’s only for human!” Papyrus waves off a few offers and cans of beer.

“Screw Sans!” Undyne barrels through the crowd, fist pulling Papyrus into the kitchen. “Let’s get our party on!” You hear someone else shout Alyphs’ name to stop them. Apparently the kitchen is no place for fish monsters and skeletons.

People quickly disperse from the foyer, leaving you and Alyphs standing there. She looks as dazed as you do, but the voice yells for her again, this time in notable distress. She gives you a ‘please help’ look. Of course you agree. It’s Alyphs.

It’s another thirty minutes before you find Aria again. Not that you were looking very hard. You played a few games against Undyne and Papyrus, who is apparently Sans’ brother, which was a complete mess. Undyne flipped the table before it was over. Luckily your partner was willing to take your drinks for you. Except the ones Undyne made you take. It was just too much fun.  

You rush out the back, letting the crisp night air cool your flushed face. You see a familiar body laying back on the table of the patio set.

“Aria? Is that you? Why are you out here?”

“Taking a break. I can only be around people for so long.” She says, without sitting up. That surprises you. She’s also much more subdued than earlier. You sit on the table next to her, testing the stability. Seems strong enough. You sit crossed-legged in front of her, as Sans walks outside.

You have a moment of eye contact, but instead of looking down like you normally do, you just stare. You stare the same way he does at you. Alcohol, the keeper of your confidence.

With the sweet ethanol streaming through you, inhibiting your normal need to avoid confrontation you ask. “Why do you hate me so much?”

Sans looks surprised as Aria bounces up from her spot. “WHAT?” She shouts. She probably fell asleep for a second. “Did you just?” Aria gives you a look of shock which fades into a smirk. “I’m so proud.” She drops back down, throwing her hands over her face.

Sans is still standing there, looking nervous. “If you don’t have a reason, then stop being an ass.” You continue. You didn’t really care anymore. Alyphs wasn’t going to kick you out of the lab now that you’ve proven yourself useful.

Sans just stood there. You wanted to have more of a presence, but you mostly just swayed where you sat. The silence made moments seem like hours. Aria pushes herself up from her previous position.  

“Sans, if this is one of your dumb jokes, it’s really shitty.” Aria turns to Sans, arms crossed.

“My jokes are awesome.” He finally responds. “I’m surprised you’re acting this way, Aria.”

“Me?” She recoils to the loudness of her own voice. “You’re the one being weird and jerky. And what? Just kick one of the human souls to the curb because you aren’t feeling it? That’s some straight crap.” You see now that Aria’s face is flushed across her cheeks. She’s a lot more drunk than she’s acting. You’re impressed.

Sans and Aria are arguing back and forth for a little bit before the words catch up with you. “Wait. One of the human souls? What does that mean? Is that special?” The last few words are gurgled, as you quickly cover your mouth.

“Eh?” Aria gives you a confused look. She whips her head back toward Sans, losing her balance for a second. “I thought you said everyone who has a lost soul knows they have it.” She glares hard. You’re trying to figure out what’s going on, but it’s really beyond you at this point. You probably shouldn’t have taken another two celebratory shots with Undyne and Alyphs.

“That’s because she doesn’t have one of the six human souls at all. Isn’t that right, _Chara?_ ” The way Sans’ says your name makes you furious. You jump off the table, in the attempt to verbally confront him to his face, but as soon as you touch down you feel a rush dizziness.

The last thing you remember is yelling and the color blue before you pass out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so into the six human souls you guys.  
> One thing I really wanted for Chara in this fic was to have human companionship that she can confide in, that has similar experiences. It was really important to me that a connection to the human world isn't lost. I know it's kind of out of the ordinary, but I promise it's not just something to fill space. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	3. A Name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, this ended up waaaay more angsty and intense than I thought it was going to, but I also don't want this to take forever. 
> 
> But you know, maybe Sans actually had a reason for being an ass. Maybe.

You wake up to shouting. It hurts your head and you feel like you’re spinning. You press both palms over your ears and shut your eyes as tight as they let you.

“T-they’re awake!” You recognize Alyphs’ voice. It’s shakier than normal, and you can tell she’s trying to get someone’s attention, but it’s much too loud.  

“What time is it?” Your words come out garbled but Alyphs seems to have understood.

“1:30. You’ve only been out for a little over an hour and a half.” Alyphs smiles gently.

Through your stupor, you remember you work for Alyphs. Your boss shouldn’t see you in a state like this. “Please don’t fire me.” Your voice is raspy. She laughs and shakes her head. “Don’t worry, Chara. Mistakes happen. It’s all part of science right?” She’s so great.

You try your best to smile back, but your face aches. The shouting continues from the kitchen, a mangled mix of distorted voices. You can pick out Aria’s voice, but the rest just blend together. Alyphs asks if she should ask them to be quiet, but tell her not too. You sit up and attempt to call for Aria. By some miracle she actually hears you over the mess.

“Holy hell, are you okay?” She runs over and starts making you do weird things like count backwards from 10 and squeeze her fingers as hard as you can. You often forget that Aria is an actual medical student.

“So do I have brain damage?” You ask weakly. Aria shakes her head and laughs. “Nope. Not from today anyways. You just jumped down way harder than you thought you did. Plus you’re still kinda drunk.”

Papyrus rushes over with a plate of something that looks like it was once noodles. The sight of it almost makes you vomit. That would be even more embarrassing than the position you’re in now. “HUMAN! Nourishment will be what’s best for you and my world famous spaghetti will cure you instantly!”

“Pap,” Undyne comes up from behind him, lifting the plate from his grip. She then proceeds to throw the plate as hard as she can into the kitchen. You hear the plate shatter. Papyrus wails, chasing after his destroyed meal. It makes you take a second and look around. Where are you? You’re on an old couch, a weird shade of green. You can see a good sized TV, wood paneling that reaches half way up the wall and a huge staircase. You aren’t sure if it’s big, or that your eyes aren’t working as well as you want. 

“Humans need fluids! Right, Aria?” She half shouts, half laughs. You flop back down pulling a couch cushion over your face.

You could hear Aria telling everyone to get the hell out, and then politely asking Alyphs if she wouldn’t mind leaving the room. Everyone complied, you assumed, because it got quiet. You pulled the pillow off your face and sat up, immediately retracting into the couch. Sans was sitting on the floor in front of you, face in one hand, resting on his knee while he sat criss-crossed.

“Ready to explain, or are you just going sit there and sulk?” Aria’s voice is taunting him. As if she’s daring him to say no. She drops down on the couch next to you. “Because frankly, Sans, you at least owe me an explanation.”

He doesn't look up.

“There’s other people I can ask, Sans.” Aria leans back, sounding uncharacteristically articulate. “But  _you’re_  going to tell me.” Rather, it felt like this was what she really sounds like. The wild goofball was maybe more of a cover.

“Fine, fine. No reason to  _rattle my bones_  about it.” No one laughs. “Tough crowd. Fine. Chara.” He almost choked on your name. “What do you know about what happened in the underground?”

You wracked your brain. You were still drunk, making it hard to think. You knew the story in general, but not many details beyond that. No one really talked about it. “I guess just that the kid Frisk fell and instead of fighting their way out, they saved all the monsters and broke the barrier. Not much else.”

Sans shrugs. “That’s what most humans know. I’m sure that’s all you know.” His inflection is saturated with sarcasm.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Aria pulled at her face. “You’re making no sense.”

“Can’t help it. It’s part of my charm.” Sans waves Aria’s comment off while she rolled her eyes in the most exaggerated way possible. You’re kind of insulted, but you aren’t sure why so you laugh.

“Anyways,” You’re given a suspicious look. You direct your attention back to the couch while Sans’ continues. “More than one child fell into the underground. None of them came out alive except Frisk.”

You nod slowly. You had heard that there had been other incidences of children disappearing on Mt. Ebott. You just hadn’t thought to put it together. You see Aria grip the hell out of arm rest on the couch. Weird.

“The first kid to fall became part of the royal family. But they passed away from illness. The prince tried to return the body to the surface after absorbing the kid’s soul but humans almost killed him. He died when he returned to the underground from his injuries.” Sans readjusted his sitting position so he was leaning back on his arm. He rubbed the back of his head and broke eye contact.

“The human’s soul never died though. They drifted until they found a host. They found Frisk. Turns out that first kid was, and still is, a freakin’ demon.”

Maybe it was the alcohol but you couldn’t fathom what any of this had to do with you. Why would Sans even tell you this? It was supposed to be something most humans didn’t know. You peek over at Aria, who was slowly fuming. She didn’t show any signs of being surprised though. Did she already know all of this?

“Yeah, and Frisk is bound to that child’s soul.” If looks could kill, Aria would have killed Sans by now.

“Yeah, I don’t think so. I think they got out somehow. Frisk said they thought the other soul was gone, but they didn’t know where.” He replied. “I think they’re right next to you.” 

You squint. Sans was pointing somewhere. It takes you a few seconds, but he’s for sure pointing at you.

“What!?” Aria’s shouting prompted Papyrus to call from upstairs to see if everything was alright. You already had your palms pressed against your ears. Sans said everything was fine.

“Are you fucking kidding me? There’s no way! She just has a human soul! Right?” Aria looked like she was trying to smile, but her eyes gave her fear away. You didn’t really react, except to give a deer-in-the-headlights look. “You…you had a soul ask to join you, right? Bright color, looks like a heart? Nowhere to go, fills the void? Chara…” She's pleading.

You started to shake your head quickly, but the room started to spin so you slowed down. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never heard of souls doing anything.” You feel guilty for some reason, and a little shaky. You can’t remember the last time you ate.

Aria’s shoulders drop in a way you’ve never seen before. “But…that can’t be…I felt two souls…”

Are you starting to freak out? You think you might be even though you don’t know why. Aria sure is. You shift your gaze over to Sans, who’s still smiling, but not in a ‘I was totally right’ way, but more like apologetic in a way. How? You’re not in the right frame of mind to question skeleton physics.

“I don’t feel like a demon. I feel like I always have. Just me.” Your words are a little choppy, but it gets Aria’s attention, prompting her to start thinking again. “Yeah.” She shifts her weight around. “We should ask Frisk. They could confirm. Crap, I don’t have time to go all the way to Toriel’s.”

“You guys actually know Frisk?” You’re probably starting to invade Aria’s personal space, since she just pushed you back a little bit. This is a very large couch, you think.  

You can hear weird clanking. Sort of like knees cracking, but it sounds kind of like glass also. Oh, it’s Sans. “Yep. Known ‘em since they fell. I can go, Aria. Don’t  _skull-k_  too long about it.”

Aria chokes on a laugh.

“Actually,” You lurch forward a little bit. You’re not going to be left out if it involves you right? “I want to go.”

Apparently you were much further off the couch than you thought, so much so that Aria had to grab you and shove you against the back of the couch.

“I think,” Aria leaves a hand on your shoulder to keep you in place. “That’s actually a good idea.”

“That joke isn’t funny.” Sans sneers. “I’m not bringing that thing anywhere near Frisk. Drop the act already, will you?”

That set you over the edge. “I am not a thing!” You screech, wrenching forward. Aria clutches you around your torso to keep you from throwing yourself off the couch. “I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about! I'm not acting like anything! You don’t even know me!”

“I for sure know Chara’s soul is in there.” He spits back. Sans’ doesn’t reciprocate your yelling, but the effect is same as if he had.

Aria slides you back on the couch while you’re growling obscenities, holding you down with one arm. The pressure wears you out, so you stop. “Wait a damn second. Are you telling me you’ve been acting this way because you think she’s actually Chara?” Sans doesn’t move, but it’s clear Aria’s assumption is right.

“I am Chara.” You pipe in.

“You’re not helping.” Aria sighs. “But,” She directs her attention back to Sans. “You’ve been treating her like shit based off an assumption? Only Frisk could tell us for sure if what you think is even true.”

“And what if I’m right, huh?” He looks very nervous, you think.

“Why didn’t you just get rid of the problem then?” Aria pushes too hard into your arm. You can feel angry heat bleed through your shirt. “It’s because you don’t know if you’re right! You’re just trying to prove it by provoking her to act like Frisk did in the underground that time!”

Aria releases you, but you don’t move. You’re so confused. Sans stands up, shoving his hands into his jacket, hard. Aria won whatever what was going on, but everyone looks like they lost.

“You know what, Sans?” Aria practically hisses his name. He flinches. “You’re going to take Chara to see Frisk and Toriel, you’re going to do it with a damn smile, and once she’s not a ball of drunk you’re going to apologize for treating her the way you have you  _think_  she might be possessed.”

“Wow.” You start laughing. And you don’t stop. Sans give you a look you can’t really decipher.

“Fine. But if anything goes wrong, it’s on you.” He grumbles. “Can we do anything about chuckles over there?” He gets up and starts to walk to the kitchen. Aria pats you to stand up. That’s a lot of work. It’s even harder to stay standing, as a wave a dizziness and nausea wells up from your stomach.

Aria is halfway up the stairs, calling everyone back down. You try to follow, but you stumble hard, the world starting to spin. Something that feels like a bar locks under your arms keeping you from falling.

Oh, it’s Sans again. What a jerk. “Aria, she looks like shit, can you do anything about it?” He calls, but is cut short by your response.

Which is to vomit all over him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not much for over world type narration, so we'll just have to suffer with drunk Chara who doesn't currently have the capacity to ask about some of the sketch stuff being discussed.
> 
> But we're about to meet some fun new friends! 
> 
> And Sans gets to be less of a jerk.


	4. Frisk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mute Frisk is one of my favorite headcanons but my version has to talk so much that it just wasn't working out so well. For everyone that does make it work, you guys are impressive as hell. 
> 
> Also, I don't know anything about motorcycles you guys.

_“So you haven’t actually spoken to him in a week?”_

“Not, like, an actual conversation. Just enough to get by in the lab. I think It’s a combined effort to avoid each other.”

You were sitting in your living room, sinking deep into our couch talking to Aria on the phone. Today would be meeting Frisk, the human who survived in the underground, saved all the monsters and broke the barrier. You imagined that you probably would have been very excited in any other case.

_“You two are going to be the death of me, I swear. Either way, you’re going to have to get over that. Try to have fun, okay? Frisk is awesome. Anyways, I’ll talk to you later. And please don’t throw up on Sans again.”_

“Aria! Can you not?!”

_“Haha, just kidding! Seriously though, you’ll be okay. No worries. Bye!”_

“Bye.”

You hit the end button on your phone. Hard. Aria sounded so sure, but you weren’t. That was the exact reason why you felt like throwing up again. You kind of wish you had stayed passed out that night, because remembering it the next day was the most mortifying thing you could have imagined. Sans already couldn’t stand you, and then you went and heaved a gastric cocktail all over him. And now you had to go with him to meet Frisk and Toriel. Together.

Well, you didn’t have to. You wanted to. You wanted to have your questions answered.

One of your roommates was standing in your student apartment kitchen rummaging through the fridge. “What was that all about? Are you dating someone?” She had week old birthday cake, a sandwich, yogurt and chocolate covered pretzels piled sky high onto a small plate.

“No.” Your answer is curt.

“Was it about you being super drunk that last week? You never do that.” She stuck her finger in the frosting, taking a nice gob to stick in her mouth.

“Yes. No. I just have to go somewhere with this guy from the lab. He’s not my biggest fan.”

Your phone rattles on the table with a text. You don’t have the number saved.

“Here.” Was all it said.

“And now I have to go.” You sigh. Your roommate puts down her smorgasbord. “Oh, I wanna see.” She follows you out, snaking around you to get a better look.

Your apartment complex is open to the outside, so when you walk out from your second floor home you can see the parking lot. You recoil, but your roommate leans over the railing and whistles. “That is a nice bike dude.”

Well, she isn’t wrong. The motorcycle is one with a think frame, looking like it might be for racing. It’s mostly black except for an electric blue design running across the side and all of the accents are in a deep silver. The helmet matches.

Your phone buzzes again. Same number. “I can see you, come on.” It reads.

“No way.” You breathe.

Your roommate narrows her eyes. “Is that who you’re going with? Are you sure this isn’t a date?” She waves. The driver waves back. “Well whatever it is, I approve.” She gives you a thumbs up and sashays dramatically back into the apartment before you can protest.

“Sans…um…” The motorcycle is much bigger now that you’re in front of it. Sans takes off his helmet and waves it to air it out. Do skeletons even sweat? Monster ones probably do. Dwelling on it is pointless. “I don’t think I’m okay to ride this.”

“Listen,” He pulled out another helmet from the backseat compartment and throws it toward you. You fumble with it, but ultimately catch it. It’s the same style but colored white and neon orange. “I told Aria I’d take you. And I am. If you’re not _revved up_ about riding my bike, you can just stay home.” He smirks.

You grumble, and pull yourself onto the bike, Sans having to grab the back of your jacket to keep you from falling off. Damn your short legs. You shove the helmet over your head and cross your arms. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” The words are heavily muffled through the thick padding of the helmet. Sans…actually smiles at you? He follows it by what you assume is rolling his eye. Those little lights are hard to read. You’re happy the visor is dark, because you’re very unsure of the facial expression you’re making.

“Hold on, kid.” The engine throttle, ringing in your ears. He pulls out of the parking lot, onto the main road. He hits the speed limit faster than you realize, and you’re clutching the back of his blue jacket harder than you want to. This was going to be a long ride.

You roll up to a house about 30 minutes out from the city. You want to actually see it, but your vision is mostly blue right now. You’ve pressed your face into Sans’ back and turned your arms into a vice grip around his torso. Hopefully crushing his ribs a little. No one told him it was okay to go almost 100 mph down a back road with you there. That was so not okay.

“Uh, we’re here. You can let go now.” He tries to pry one of your arms off himself, but you’re still locked up.

“I…am going…to kill you.” Your words are breathy and sort of panicky. Eventually you start to let up and he pulls himself away. You’re still beyond having control of all of your muscles, so Sans helps pull you down like the child you are.

“I knew it.” He smirks, yanking your helmet off to put it away. You decide to ignore that comment. Your hair is static-y, at the edges and sweaty at the base. You can feel how flushed your face is from being hurled down a highway. Sans tilts his head a bit, but doesn’t have any real reaction. So much for trying to look presentable.

“Please don’t do that again. I want to live to see my own graduation, thank you.” You try to smooth down your hair a bit, but your forced to give up, yanking an elastic off your wrist and tie it in a low bun, stray strands sticking out from every direction.

“No promises.” Sans says as he turns on his heel and starts walking towards the house along a cobblestone path. Following behind you get a good look at the house. It’s a lavender-brown colonial style house, pillars and grand windows abound. The front garden is immaculate, some type of yellow colored flower flanking the walkway. It was impressive, but for some reason the proportion of the house seemed…off. Almost like it was too big.

You figured out why the house seemed large after Sans’ knock on the front door was answered. Six feet of silken white fur adorned in a collared royal purple day dress answered the door. While very human, she was also very animal like with long ears drooped over her shoulders and waxen horns protruding from her head. Her statuesque posture and warm smile were like none you’ve seen before.

“Good afternoon, young one. I am Toriel.” A large hand grasped your with just enough pressure, giving you a dignified shake. “Hello, Sans.” She gave a short nod to the skeleton who returned the gesture. You, on the other hand, just stood there looking bewildered. “I’m so glad you decided to visit. I’ve heard very interesting things about you. Come inside from the cold. Please make yourself at home.”

Toriel all but shoved you in the house, not that you could have move to well on your own. Monsters were an everyday part of your life. But Toriel was something else altogether.

“Frisk is running an errand for me. They should be home shortly.” Toriel had you and Sans sitting at an oversized mahogany table, serving you the brightest colored tea you had ever seen. She took a seat at the table herself, taking a sip of from her cup.

Toriel seemed to be studying you. You shifted slightly uncomfortably under her gaze. “You are friends with Aria, are you not?” She asked inquisitively, eyes trained on you. “Yes. We just became friends recently.” You sipped your tea, almost scaling your mouth. You pressed your mouth together tightly, trying to not show the pain. You’re not so good with hot drinks.

“She has said a lot of about you. It seems like you have made a good impression on such a rambunctious youth. She did not say how similar you and Frisk look though.” She gives herself a second to ponder her own thoughts. “They are very eager to meet you.” Toriel’s smile was serene, if not wistful.

“You think so, Tori?” Sans almost seemed to scoff at the idea.

“Why yes I do. And Sans, I am glad you came to visit. Frisk has been so very excited all week.” Her smile was strained at the edges. Sans, who usually always had something to stay was now uncharacteristically quite. “I meant to get out here sooner.” He carefully rocks the china back and forth on the plate, making an unattractive clanking noise. You sip your own tea, now a little cooler, thinking that’s kind of rude. But it is Sans, after all.

“Working with Alyphs can make me real _dino_ -sore some times.” Sans’ smile is spread wide across his face and Toriel lets out a snorting laugh. The noise makes you jump, almost spilling your drink. It was clever, you had to admit, but it wasn't that funny. While Toriel laughs, Sans looks almost too content with himself. Weird.

“Mom? I’m home!” You hear the front door open and slam shut. “We’re in the dining room, my child.” She replies calmly, which is impressive considering she was just cracking up a few seconds ago.

You remember vaguely what Frisk looks like from TV, but it’s been a long time since then. Instead of a small elementary schooler, hiding behind bangs that are much too long, you’re greeted by a high schooler, hair slightly mussed, smile bright.

But holy crap, Toriel was right. Frisk really did look you. Somehow, the both structure in your face was so similar with small but prominent angles, though theirs was still flush with some baby fat, the same kind wispy limbs and small frame. If someone didn’t know better, the two of you could easily pass for siblings.

“Sans!” Frisk rushes over and hugs Sans over the back of the chair. They’re probably right about your height. “I’m so happy you came to visit.” It's a little jarring to see Sans and Frisk interact so much...like family. 

“Of course, kiddo.” Sans grips the top of Frisk’s shoulders, pulling them forward, tipping the chair back sending Frisk into a flurry of laugher. “I wouldn’t miss your awkward teenage years. Don’t want you getting too _frisky_ , huh?”

Frisk bursts into a second fit of laugher, Toriel telling them to stop before they break something. You feel like a complete intruder. After a second to readjust, Frisk finally gives you an actual look.

All of the color drains from their face.

Both Sans and Toriel notice immediately. “Frisk, my child. This is one of the students Sans’ works with. You have been waiting to meet Chara all week.” She softly remind them. It doesn't seem to change their initial reaction.

Frisk just stands there, looking terrified. You can feel your heart rate pick up. “H-hi. I’m Chara.” You move to get up from your chair, but your sudden motion causes Frisk to jump back.

“Frisk!” Toriel rises from her chair. “This is very rude of you.” She walks over looking stern, taking one of Frisk’s arms. It seems to bring them back for a second.

“Ah,” Frisk stares at the ground, bangs covering their face. “I’m sorry. I’m Frisk. Nice to meet you.”

The tension in the air is palpable, slowly choking you. Frisk’s panic, Toriel’s disappointment, and now you can feel the familiar pressure of Sans boring holes into the back of your head. This really was a bad idea. Why did you want to do this again?

Was what Sans’ said actually true?

The heaviness of the air is sliced with a jaunty ringing coming from the kitchen. Toriel releases Frisk, excusing herself to take the call leaving the three of your alone.

Frisk stares you down, then turns their attention to Sans. “Why did you bring them here? You brought Chara back?” Their tone was unbelieving, and they’re slowly heaving.

Without thinking you stand up. “I don’t know what’s going on. Everyone said you can tell me that. Why are you afraid of me?” Frisk backpedals, holding their own arms tight to their body. You feel hot tears bubble up. You haven’t done anything wrong. Everyone was treating you like you were some type of horrible creature and you had no idea why. “I can’t stand this anymore. First Sans, now you. I don’t even know you.” Your words are parted by weak hiccupping noising. How pathetic. You keep your eyes on Frisk, but you can see Sans shuffle uncomfortably in your periphery.

Frisk, fear still etched into their face, slowly approached you. “So you really don’t know me?”

“Only from TV.” You push a fist under your eye, to help you hold back tears.

“But then why do I…” Frisk looks away, inhaling sharply. “Why do I feel Chara?”

Their words make no sense. You study each other for a second more, but you don’t ‘remember’ anything.

“There’s only way to actually know. You’re the only one who’d know, Frisk.” Sans finally chips in, waving one hand in the air. Frisk shifts their gaze between Sans and you. Their demeanor changes, give Sans a solid and strong nod.  

For a second, there’s a shimmering red light to your side. Something bright phases out from Frisk’s chest. You lurch back, almost tripping over the chair. Your breathing becomes ragged as the light takes the shape of a crystalline heart.

“What the hell?” You cry, finding yourself trapped against a wall. “What did you do?!” Your voice comes out high pitched and shaking. Though Frisk looks alright, you’re still terrified. Sans' pulled their heart out! 

Sans turns his attention to you. “That’s Frisk’s soul. Your turn. Time to settle this.”

You pulling a pulling force on your chest. It feels like you’re choking, like it doesn’t want to come out. You grab at your shirt, your previous tears now overflowing. You try protesting, but your voice is ripped from your throat. You can see some kind of lighting shinning but it doesn’t look like Frisk’s. The light is much dimmer, much darker, almost like a black light.

Through heavy breathing, you see it. Another crystalline heart floating in front of you.

Its pitch black.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh.  
> Probably a case of looks worse than it is right? 
> 
> I'm not sure why, but I was super into the idea that even though Sans is suppose to be super lazy hes a low-key adrenaline junkie because they're the kinds of people who can handle those crazy situations without breaking a sweat. Hence the bike.


	5. Chara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About time Chara figured out what was going on, I think.  
> Ya'll know the story.

Toriel calls from the kitchen, asking what all the noise is about. Sans tells her you and Frisk are getting better acquainted.

To be fair, you kind of were. Except for the part where your soul was a black hole. “What’s going on?” You manage to choke out. There’s no actual pain, but you’re so distressed that you feel like you are in pain.

“That’s…definitely Chara.” Frisk pulls back a little bit, as if to protect their own little heart. You and Frisk notice the lights in Sans’ eyes are out and he’s moving toward the both of you. Frisk jumps in front of you, almost like they’re protecting you. Lights out must be a bad thing. “But something’s weird.” They quickly explain. “It’s almost like Chara’s asleep. They can’t do anything like this. Even if it looks like this,” Frisk made a motion around your heart. “Her soul is too calm.”

“I’m awake, aren’t I? How do you know…something is in me?” You muster enough strength to stand up. The little crystalline heart slowly phases back into you. Frisk’s follows suit. It feels like it was never there in the first place.

Sans walks over, giving you a once over. “You and that little devil soul have the same name, it’s kind of a pain. Maybe a coincidence, but I doubt it. The other Chara isn’t so reckless. And considering Frisk’s spent the last 5 years with that thing connect to their soul I would really say they’re the only one who know exactly what Chara’s soul feels like.” Sans explains, actually looking at you for the first time. You put your head down. You can’t make real eye contact.

“And you.” He walks over to Frisk. “What do you mean asleep? Is Chara just down for a nap?” He asks Frisk, who looks considerably calmer. “I think when Chara left me they went looking for someone new, but since we aren’t in the underground they couldn’t just outright possess someone. Maybe they’re just waiting until they’ve recovered. I had them locked down for a long time. It was not a fun experience when they got out.” Frisk takes a bunch of fabric in their fist from the edge of their shirt and squeeze.

“I’m really sorry Chara.” Frisk offers you their hand. You’re tentative but you take it so they can pull your off the floor. “I was just scared. And I’m sorry about what’s happened. It’s kind of my fault I guess.” They rub a hand behind their head.

“Thank you.” You take Frisk’s other hand, surprising them. “I’m still not sure what’s happening, but if it’s okay with you, can you help me? Can you tell me everything?” You give half a smile. It was a lot to ask, but Frisk nods.

“Yeah.” Their face slowly spreads into a sweet smile. “Yeah! I’ve saved everyone before. I can for sure save you!”

You aren’t quite sure what that means, but you feel better none the less.

“Oh good. You children seem to be getting along.” Toriel walks back into the room, a smile spread across her muzzle.

“Yep!” Frisk jumps next to you, throwing an arm over your shoulder, pulling you into a half hug. You mimic their big cheesy smile. Well that was a quick turnaround time. All you had to do was not be the ‘bad’ Chara. Easy. “We’re gonna go hang out!”

“Is your room still in the same state as it was yesterday?” Toriel casts a smug grin. Frisk frowns dramatically.

“Actually, I’ll be right back.” Frisk rushes out of the room, and from what you gather, runs up a staircase somewhere. You laugh a little bit.

“That child is certainly something.” Toriel sighs. “I will help them just for the sake of time. Pardon me.” She bows slightly before leaving the room.

“Hey.” Somehow, Sans is standing next you. It startles you, but in your state it’s not surprising that you weren’t really paying attention. “I guess I should probably apologize, too.” He’s got one boney hand around his mouth, and he’s looking away. You squint a little, thinking you see something blue? “I was just so sure you were actually…the bad Chara pretending to be a normal human. I wouldn’t put it past them, but I was wrong.”

He drops his arm and makes direct eye contact with you. “Sorry. Can we start over?”

You whip around, feeling your face burning. After taking a deep breath to calm yourself down from whatever that was, you turn back around. “No.”

“No?” He’s completely taken aback. In shock, really. What exactly did he expect you to say?

“That’s right. Starting over is a cop out.” You cross your arms, pressing a hard look onto your face. You hope you look at least a little daunting. “You’re going to make it up to me for being such a jerk if you want to be my friend. You can’t just undo the things you’ve already done.”

Sans’ puts a hand over his face, shoulders shaking. Is he laughing? “You know what? You’re completely right.” Your eyes widen. He agreed with you, holy crap. “You can’t just start over. You’d think I’d remember that after all this time.”

You had so many questions. You supposed no matter what happened, Sans would always be cryptic.

But maybe now he’s actually treat you like he treats everyone else.

You heard thumping coming from the second floor, following by rushing down steps. “Chara!” Frisk bursts through the room, reaching for you. They grab your arm and start hauling you somewhere.

“Sans,” Frisk pokes their head back into the dining room as Toriel walks back in. “You stay here. I have to talk to Chara.” Sans shrugs and sit down at the table with Toriel. You wave, but Frisk pulls you away too quickly before you see a response.

Frisk’s room is adorable. The furniture is a light colored wood, sitting atop plush cream carpeting. Books and drawing are scattered all over the desk, though they look they there may have been attempt to put them in order. Even though they’re in high school, there’s an array of stuffed animals on the bed. Frisk sits in the rolling chair, and you pull yourself onto the bed. The quilted blanket is worn, but feels like there’s a lot of love in it. 

After re-stacking some books Frisk turns to you. “I know I said Chara was with your soul, but I can see why Sans thought something else, and why I was so scared even though I  felt two separate souls." Frisk notices the confused expression on your face. "Oh! All monsters can feel souls, and some people with really strong souls. You soul is almost identical to the bad Chara. But they're so similar I don't think even normal monsters can see that you have two.” That’s unsettling, you think. “I don’t know if it means anything. Not yet anyways.”

Frisk shifts around uncomfortably for a second. “I’m going to tell you some stuff, but you have to promise not to tell my mom okay? She doesn’t know about this stuff. She could feel your soul, but she won’t try to pry. And maybe not talk to Sans about it, even he doesn’t know everything. I don't know if it will solve anything, but you should know all of it.” You lean you head forward so Frisk can’t see you smirk. About damn time.

“When I fell into the underground,” Frisk starts, swinging the chair back and forth the way anyone in a rolling chair would. “I found out I could do this weird thing where I could get hurt but return to a time before that. Or if I really wanted to I would just start all over the moment I fell. But not to a moment before it, so I could never use it to leave the underground. I made mistakes, things went wrong. But I always got to go back.”

“Are you saying…like time travel?” As much as you couldn’t believe it, you had to. Monsters existed. Magic was real. Your soul was removed from your body and it’s possessed. You didn’t have many arguments against Frisk being able to time travel.

“Sort of. I couldn’t figure out the right way to get out of the underground. My memory was always fuzzy when I…Sans calls it a reset.” Oh. OH. Was that what Sans meant earlier? He meant literally going back and starting over.  

“And then one of those times” Frisk continues, they’re voice dropping to just above a whisper. “…I wasn’t alone. Someone was with me and I didn’t know who. They didn’t do anything that time. They just kept me company in my head.” Frisk shot a glance up, worry pressed into their face. “I hope that doesn’t make me sound crazy.” You shake your head. They smile back. “That’s good, because it gets much worse from there.”

Frisk takes a deep breath. “They told me they could help me get out. If we reset and let them help. I was so little…I really trusted them. I wanted to go home. So when I reset again, things were different. They took over me. I was still me, but it wasn’t. I couldn’t stop myself…I hurt everyone in the underground. I…killed them. Everyone.” At the point you aren’t sure if Frisk is even speaking to you anymore as they stare at their own hands. They press their mouth together and look back up at you. “The memories are fuzzy, but I know it was me. And Chara. The both of us together did all of those horrible things.”

Frisk’s voice is shaky. They’re sort of hunched over, knees pressed together tightly. You’re not sure what to make of the situation. You had only just met, but you couldn’t imagine Frisk hurting anyone. Not after the way they reacted to you earlier. But you’re also starting to become afraid. The Chara inside of you made this child kill people. What could it do to you?

“But I was still able to reset. It took becoming friends with everyone to get us out. Sans is the only one besides me who remembers anything about resetting. But he doesn’t know about Flowey. Alyphs does, but not like this. I think that’s why Chara finally left my soul and went looking for someone else.”

Frisk left their chair to sit next to you. “You have to promise not to tell, okay?” The way Frisk was looking at you, pouring with determination, there was no way you could refuse. So you didn’t. “I promise I won’t Frisk.”

Content with your answer, Frisk continues. “Flowey is a flower, but he wasn’t always that way. He used to be Asriel. He was the prince of monsters, my mom’s birth son.”

“I didn’t’ know Toriel had any kids besides you. And that’s right, Toriel is the queen of monsters.” Frisk bobs their head in agreement. You couldn’t ever remember seeing anyone else at Toriel’s side besides Frisk on TV.

“No one ever talks about it. It’s really hard for mom. She barely told me anything about it. But she also had another kid, a human one. They’re the first fallen human. That’s Chara.”

“Yeah.” You pick at a loose hem on your shirt. “I kind of know about that.”

“The story says that Chara died after getting sick and Asriel tried to return them to the surface but was attacked and died when we he came back. That’s sort of the truth. Asriel told me.”

“I thought you said Asriel was someone else now? Sorry Frisk, this is all really confusing.” You pull your knees up, leaning your face atop them.

“I know, I’m sorry too. Asriel’s soul is in Flowey now, but for a little while they were able to be Asriel again right before I left the underground. It’s another long story. But he said Chara wasn’t a good person. That they hated people which is how they ended up in the underground in the first place. They were mean, despite all the kindness they received. So Chara made a plan and poisoned themselves by eating yellow buttercups. As a dying wish, Chara said they wanted Asriel to take their soul and bring the body to the surface. What Chara really wanted was to merge together their souls and take over, so they could have their ultimate revenge on humans. But Asriel was able to stay in control. That’s the only thing that saved the surface.”

“That’s inside of me?” Your voice a little high pitched. Frisk nods slowly. “What do they want with me?”

“That might still be my fault. Chara never left me when we left the underground. At first I could feel them trying to fight me, but I stay determined not to let them take over. Eventually, their voice just went quiet. Then one day they separated from me. It was awful. But I see now that Chara simply moved bodies to someone who wasn’t me. They might still want Asriel’s power. They probably still want to end this world. Humans, monsters, everyone.”

Frisk takes your hand and squeezes it. “I’m really, really sorry.”

You can feel yourself panicking a little. An entity that once tried to end all of humanity is inside you. Maybe asleep now, but what about tomorrow? Or next week? But what good would do possess you? You’re just a normal human, nothing special. You don’t even have any link to any of these people or monsters. Why you?

Downcast, Frisk sighs. You can see them blaming themselves. How much had this kid suffered already, you wonder. “Listen, I’m kind of freaked out right now. Really freaked out actually. But this isn’t your fault okay? If determination is what I need to keep the bad Chara at bay,” Saying your own name with distain was odd. “Then I’ll be the most determined person who ever walked this earth. After you, of course.”

You and Frisk started to head down the stairs after a long few minutes of silent hugging. All of sudden you have a soul-deep bond with a teenager. You poked your head in the kitchen and then immediately pulled back, covering your mouth because you made a strange yipping noise. Toriel and Sans are talking, but it’s…very intimate. Toriel is laughing softly with one of her paw completely engulfing Sans’.

“Oh yeah,” Frisk giggles. “Sans used to like my mom.” The way Frisk is trying to stifle a laugh you assume your eyes completely bugged out of your head. “But that was a long time ago. They’re still super weird about it sometimes.” Frisk laughs at your continued shock. “To be fair though, everyone loves my mom.” Frisk beams proudly, and after a few seconds of contemplation you decide wholeheartedly agree. Overall though, you aren’t sure how you feel about such a situation.

Instead of letting Frisk rush in there, you call out saying you were coming in. The pout at your intervention, but there’s no need to make things awkward since you’ve already done at least one other time. As you walk in, Frisk links their arm with yours, grin stretched across their face.

“Seems like you two really had a _heart-to-heart_ , huh?” Sans is rocking on the back two legs of the chair, pleased with his joke.

“You’ve been waiting to say that since we went upstairs, haven’t you?” Knowing more about what’s going on seems to have given you the confidence boost you’ve been looking for. Not expecting that response from you of all people, Sans almost falls out of the chair. Toriel stifles a laugh while Frisk is not too worried in hiding their enjoyment. 

“Alright, alright. You got me.” And for the first time since you met him, Sans gave you a genuine smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of imagine Frisk getting traits of all the monsters who played a big role in their life while growing up.  
> The next few chapters won't be as heavy, but don't worry. Things don't stay good forever.
> 
> I really like that you guys are so inquisitive about where I'm going with the story!


	6. What to do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, I have an exam Monday so I haven't had a chance to much else except study. I managed to finish this chapter on a break. So I hope you guy like it.

The rest of the afternoon was spent around Toriel’s kitchen table, stories traded, laughs had. It was something you realized you missed being so far from home. Maybe you’d call your mom when you got home.

Waving goodbye from the drive way, Sans handed you the helmet from earlier. You cringed at the thought of getting back on that bike. It was bad enough in daylight, and now the sun was starting to set.

“I won’t torture you this time, scouts honor.” Sans knocked the kickstand up, and you settled yourself behind him.

You shimmy the helmet on, until it was comfortable. Shoving it last time was not the best choice. “You weren’t a scout.” You reply.

“Yeah. It was too in- _tents_ for me.” He was already laughing at the joke he very clearly set up. You smacked your head against his back. “Walked right into that one. Just take me home.” You tried to sound annoyed, but your amusement was too apparent.

“I think I know somewhere better.” The motorcycle peeled out of the driveway.

The ride was no better the second time around. You were heaving by the time Sans slowed down into a dark parking lot. Sans parks behind a row of dive bars, an area you knew fairly well. You recognize the back of the neon sign.

“Are we at Grillby’s?” You huff, yanking the helmet off.

“You know Grillby’s?” Sans was genuinely surprised.

You slid off the motorcycle yourself this time, taking a moment to fix your clothes. “Yeah. One of my roommates loves this place. She’s in this weird ‘obsessed with monster but won’t actually speak to them’ phase. She says she’s too intimidated.” You explain.

Sans laughs at the absurdity of it. “No fooling, huh? You humans are hilarious. Was that the one from earlier?” He knocks the kickstand down, and jumps off without even a stumble as he hits the ground.

“No,” You roll your eyes. What a show off. “That was Dena. The roommate I’m talking about is Mercedes.” Not that it mattered. Why would Sans even care about that?

He ushers for you to follow where he yanks open the back door for you, a second entrance from the parking lot. You stuck your noise in the air, and walked past him without staying anything.

“Like I said, human are hilarious.”

It was still early in the evening, but Grillby’s was already buzzing with the early weekend crowd. It wasn’t a huge place, but it was almost homey with dark woods, plush booths, and soft lighting. You weren’t much for bars, but the owner kept the music to a manageable volume and it was never packed wall to wall like some places.

“There you guys are, geez.”

“Aria?” Standing on your tiptoes, you could see Aria sitting in a booth directly in front of you, looking annoying. Papers, pens and highlighters were strewn across the table.

You must have looked surprised, since Aria turned to Sans and sighs. “Did you not tell her I was here? Did you just drag her here?”

“Too much work. You do enough work for the both of us. Don’t you ever stop studying?” Sans plops himself down on the opposite side of booth, and while you would rather sit next to Aria, the current set up doesn’t allow you any space on her side. So you forced to sit with the greater of two evils.

“Not three days before an exam. Some of us aren’t natural geniuses.” She directs her comment toward Sans, who just grins and shrugs. Aria pulls the papers together and straightens them out while sneering. “Plus you told me you’d be here an hour ago. Of course I’m not so stupid to think you’d be on time but I wasn’t going to take any chances.”

“Anyways, how was it? Sans’ wouldn’t tell me on the phone.” You could tell how eager Aria was to know what was going on. That was one thing you learned about her the past few weeks. She really liked to _know._ But her words were also tinged with annoyance.

“Long story short,” Sans was clearly getting any impression that Aria might be pissed off. “Bad Chara is in this Chara, but is dormant. Scared the soul right outta Frisk, that’s for sure.” A server dropped off a bottle of ketchup and that was it. Aria immediately grabs it as Sans reaches out. “Hey that’s mine.”

Aria makes a noise somewhere between grunt and laugh. “You are not drinking out of this in front of me, it’s gross.”

“Eww. You drink ketchup?” You kind of scoot away, face pulled into a grimace.

“Oh yeah, you guys are real accepting of monsters until we do things you don’t like.” Sans crosses his arms in a pseudo-pout.

“Don’t pull that. You’re the only monster that freakin’ drinks condiments.” Aria pushes the bottle even further from his reach.

“We can have an intervention another time. We have bigger problems than the things I drink, don’t you think?”

You turn to Sans, eyes narrowed. “Did you rhyme on purpose?”

That shit-eating grin could have been seen for miles. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

It was super weird to be interacting like this. Not bad weird though.

“Okay, okay. What exactly are we going to do about Chara? What happens is bad Chara…is that what we’re calling them now? It’s stupid, whatever. If bad Chara takes over what exactly happens?” Aria slid the glass bottle back towards Sans. “Don’t you drink out of that.”

Sans pushes the bottle out of the way. “Honestly, I’m not really sure. The fact they left Frisk in the first place means they have something they want. The problem is we don’t know what.” Technically you did know what the bad Chara wanted but you promised Frisk not to say anything. “But we do know the damage they’ve done before. I can only imagine they turn you,” Sans rolls his head over his should to motion towards you. “Into some kind of killing machine. Chara’s got a vendetta for more than just humans now.”

“Isn’t there anyway to separate our souls?” You ask hopefully, but Sans expression give you an immediate answer of no. “Doing that forcefully would probably kill you. They have to willing to go, even though they didn’t ask to share.”

“Yeah, what’s up with that?” Aria pipes. “I thought you said that was a rule. Happened with me.”

“Chara isn’t much for following the rules.” Is the best answer Sans can come up with, you assume. But you’re confused for a second.

“Wait, Aria you have more than one soul too? How?” All of sudden, things made a lot more sense. That must be how she knew you had two souls.

Forgetting that she was annoyed, Aria beamed. “Yep. One of the human souls trapped in the underground joined with mine. With permission of course.” She rolled her eyes dramatically. A smirk emerges across her face. “I figured you’d ask eventually, but I guess when we were talking about it at Sans’ and Papyrus’ you were a little too drunk to remember. It happened when the barrier broke, but we can talk about that another time.””

“Can we not talk about that?” Twice in one day? Aria was never going to let you live that night down was she?

“No need to _throw it up_ right in anyone’s face, right Chara?” Sans’ face did some type of motion like he was raising his eyebrows, except he didn’t have any. It didn’t stop you from staring daggers.

“Oh good, she’s practicing for when she kills you.” Aria cocked her head and clapped her hands together. Sans jumps a little at the comment, surprising you. “Unless we figure out a way to do something.”

You rub a hand over the upper part of your chest around your neck. “If it helps, it doesn’t feel like anything else is there still.”

“For now I think we should just keep an eye on you and you tell us when anything feels weird. I’m sure the bad Chara is waiting for your soul to be weakened. If we see any signs, we can get Alyphs to give you determination to keep it at bay. Otherwise, I’m not really sure what else we can do. Frisk doesn’t know either. So it’s really our best option.”

You leaned back, feeling defeated. “So what? I’m just destined to one day turn into a murderer and there isn’t anything I can do about it except ‘stay determined’? Or have it injected into me? What does that even mean?”

“Determination are what human souls are made of.” Sans said bluntly. “The more you have, the stronger your soul. If your soul is strong, the bad Chara doesn’t have any power. Alyphs has a synthetic determination serum, so if you can’t make enough yourself, we can just give you more. We’ll do what we can to help, but it’s up to you now.”

“Oh.”

“So keep an eye on Chara, if she gets murdery inject her with determination juice. Got it.” That sounds a lot easier than you expect it will really be. “And with that, I’ve gotta go. This crap isn’t going to learn itself.” Aria motioned to the pile of paper to her side. Snapping it into a binder, she finishes packing and stands up. “I’m outta here, see you later. And Sans,” Her voice is threatening. She then cocks her head with a sickeningly sweet smile. “Don’t do anything that would make Papyrus sad.” She said in a sing-song voice.

Sans didn’t move a muscle.

Not that he could.

Sans shoves your shoulder. “We’re moving to the bar.” You don’t move. “Comeon, kid. You at least have to give me a chance to make it up to you. Just give it _shot_. It’s not so bad over there.”

“No shots.” You groan, but get up regardless. He grabs the ketchup bottle and walks over. You shutter, hoping he isn’t actually going to drink it.

Your feet don’t even touch the railing of the barstool. The bartender apparently knows Sans from the underground. That’s something you expected. You didn’t expect her to be a fire monster, lime green flames flanking a hollow pair of almond shaped eyes. It an odd way she’s very pretty in an odd way, but tough you find. She ends a bar fight before it even begins.

 

“Haven’t see you here in a while.” She says, running a rag across the counter. She places a house made beer in front of you and winks. The froth on tops sparks the same way when you mix magic with other substances. “She’s a new one, huh? Cute. What? What?!” The bartender jolts back as Sans is waving his hands frantically, looking nervous. “She’s one of Aria’s friends.” He hisses through his teeth.

“Oh.” Red flames lick over the green ones for a second. You give them both an incredulous glare. “It’s nothing sweetheart.” The owner says. “Just a misunderstanding. Sans’ isn’t dumb enough to mess with any of Aria’s friends. Not after last time right?”

You do not like what this lovely monster is insinuating. Sans has his head down, face covered by his arms. She walks off to serve different customers.

“Well that’s sketch. Didn’t think humans were your style.” You say under your breath, wringing your hands around the glass. How is it warm and cold at the same time?

“Why would you say that?” Fuck, he heard you. He wasn’t looking at you, but you could see the corners of his mouth pulled downward.

You quickly took a drink of the beer, which fizzled all the way down into your stomach. What an odd sensation. “No reason.” You cough out.

The barstool next you squeaks. “Frisk said something, didn’t they?” He’s unimpressed with your ability to lie. “Maybe?” You wince and shrug your shoulders. He doesn’t budge, so you relent. “Okay fine. Yes.”

“Good, because that’s all you’re gonna hear about it, got it?” Sans actually drank the ketchup. Between your disgust and horror, you nodded.

“Don’t worry, I’m won’t _get your goat_ about it.” What the hell, was your brain on the fritz? Sans turned his entire torso toward you, slamming the glass on the table, facing read ‘are you fucking kidding me?’

You could feel heat rising into your face. “So I’ve never had magic beer before, it’s weird huh?” Your nervous laughter apparently the tension.

“It’s not actually magic beer. You can’t give straight magic to a human. It’s a mix.” Sans explains, shaking his head at your current state.

All of a sudden, you’re struck with a moment of revelation. “Wait. Did you just say this beer is mixed with magic? And it’s stable?!” You grab the glass, spilling some over the rim causing it to run over the bar and into your lap. “Shit.”

Sans’ eye sockets widen as he realizes what you said. His grin stretches across his face. “Well damn. I guess Alyphs was right about a human being a help.”

“Hey! I’m always useful!”

“Sorry kid, you know us skeletons, always trying to get under your skin.”

You jump down from the bar stood, shaking your head. “Hilarious. I’m gonna go get cleaned up.” You sigh. You hope magic beer is a little more forgiving and doesn’t stain.

“Better hurry or up I’ll turn into a skeleton wait…ah nevermind. Too late.” You snort out a laugh while Sans looks increasing pleased with himself.

You manage to stay composed until you walk into the bathroom stall. You slam your back against the wall and slid down the floor. Which, admittedly, is pretty gross. But at the moment you don’t really care as you let your face burn up while placing your hands over your mouth to control your breathing. You can feel your heart beat up into your throat.

This is not good. He’d literally only started being nice to you like 4 hours ago. Are you that stupid?

Shit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops. 
> 
> I have another test Friday, so it might be a bit before the next chapter is up. Thanks for being patient!


	7. Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hang out in the anatomy lab a lot.  
> But have a more light-hearted chapter because I'm too burned out to study yeah!

Aria was right, it was cold in the anatomy lab. It was a huge space, but not as blandly sterile as you had imagined. The walls had been painted different hues of bright blues and yellows. It still didn’t distract from the twenty some-odd mechanical tables with body bags on them.

You had never ventured in there before, but you were done with class, still had an hour before you had to be at the lab and Aria had TA hours. Not that anyone else was there. Who comes to TA hours after an exam?

You contemplated asking Aria about how weird you were feeling, but today you felt completely fine. Actually, the entire weekend you were alright. You chalked it up to having ingested magic. You knew it could give humans weird side effects so that was probably it. Sans is a skeleton, but technically so were you to an extent. Not the same kind of skeleton though. It’s a lot to think about, so you don’t.

“So,” Aria is sitting at a rounded podium at the front of the room, flipping through pages of a book absentmindedly. “I bet Alphys lost her mind when you told her about the beer thing.”

You dance around something slimy on the floor. You try very hard to not think about what, or who, it is. “Uh, yeah. Yeah. I thought she was going to pass out on the phone when I told her. She ordered like 12 gallons of pure ethanol and some other stuff to see what we can do with it.” The podium is a little too high for you rest your arms comfortably, so you opt to lean against it instead.

Aria laughs. “How did you even figure that out? I’ve never actually thought about what was in the beer they make at Grillby’s.”

“I was kind of making an ass of myself, Frisk told me Sans use to like Toriel and I said something to myself and Sans heard it. So I tried to change the subject and, while still making an ass of myself, figured it out after Sans told me it was a mix.” You turn to Aria with a laugh in your voice, but she looks kind of horrified?

“Woah, back up there. You said what?”

“I figured it out myself?”

“No, that you brought up that Sans used to like Toriel. You never talk about Toriel to Sans. Why would you do that?” Aria presses her hand over the face, shaking her head. “This is not good.”

“I didn’t know. Nobody told me it was a secret. You didn’t say anything!” You slams your hands on the rounded podium Aria was sitting at. You’re not exactly shouting, but your voice is loud enough to firmly echo throughout the anatomy lab. Your own words boomed around you.

“I didn’t know you knew!” Aria whips out her phone and starts to rapid fire text. “Frisk, that little demon, they are going to get such a lashing.”

“Aria…” You sigh and turn around to lean on the podium again. You look out over body bags. You shutter. “It’s okay for me to be in here, right?”

“Huh? Yeah. As long as everything’s closed and a TA is in here it’s fine. But the skeletons in here are not the ones you should be worried about.” Aria flung her textbook closed, slamming her elbows on top of it and putting her head into her hands.

“You think it was that bad I said something?” You pull at the ends of your hair, moving it in front of your face.

Aria stand up, cracking both shoulders one after another. “He’s probably going to act like nothing happened, honestly. But I’m not gonna lie, when I said something to Sans he didn’t talk to me for like a week. And then he put five alarm hot sauce in the spaghetti Papyrus made…he said the next time I felt _hot mouthed_ I should remember what that actually feels like.” Aria notices your terrified look. “But that was like four years ago. It shouldn’t be a problem now. He just really doesn’t like talking about it.” She gives you an awkward smile but you don’t feel any better at all.

Your phone make a flittering noise, startling the both you. “Ahh, I have to go to the lab.” You whine. “I’d rather do physics homework. And I hate physics.”

“Oh yuck. I’d take pissy Sans over physics. Glad I don’t have to deal with either.”

“You don’t use physics in med school?”

“Eh…only in pulmonary and cardio like a little bit. Not important! You go! Stay determined.” Aria holds your bag out for you, so you snatch it away dramatically. She gives you a snarky grin in response to your deep frown. You slam your side into a metal table before walking out. Graceful.

The anatomy lab is one floor below the research labs, but you opt to run up the stairs instead of take the elevator to help dissipate the nervous energy. You're kind of out of breath by the time you get the lab, which is embarrassing. You really need to run more often.

“C-Chara! There you are!” Alphys stumbles by with a box much too large for her. You slide in front of her, taking the other end but you almost buckle under the weight. It must weigh like 60 pounds, how was she carrying this alone? “Oh! T-thank you!”

“Alphys, you shouldn’t be carrying this stuff by yourself. Where’s Sans? Shouldn’t he be helping you?” You do a quick once over of the lab, but don’t see him at all. He’s lazy for sure, but he’s never missed lab hours before.

Alphys pulls the box in the direction she wants you to walk in. “We’re j-just doing inventory today since I, uh, w-went a little overboard ordering things after you told me about the beer.” She laughs nervously, ushering you to put the box down in front of the storage room. “I l-like having all three of us working while y-you’re here, it’s the most efficient use of t-time. I t-told him he could work on his own research today.”

With one claw, Alphys tears open the packing tape revealing six glass bottles filled to the brim with viscous, clear solution. Ethanol for sure. “Sans has his own research?” This was the first time you were hearing about it.

“O-oh yes! He’s helps he half of the time, but the other half he works in t-the engineering building. He likes physics m-more than biology h-honestly.” You grab a bottle, looking for the right area to put it while Alphys starts counting what’s already in the room.

“I didn’t know that. What did you do before you left the underground?” Oh, there! That’s where this thing goes.

“I was the r-royal scientist actually. I use to do some monster health-care related things…but…um…things weren’t w-working out so it fell to the b-back burner. Haha. Sans would have thought was funny.” You turn around to get another bottle, but Alphys is still standing the doorway. Her face was downcast. She sees that you’re looking her way and tries to perk up. “I-it was a bigger priority to get out of the u-underground, really. I’m v-very good with mechanics, but I’m h-happy I get to do what I l-like again!”

She hurries out of the room to grab more stuff. You were left to stand there wondering what to make of what Alphys just told you. It wasn’t too like her to talk about herself, so you were happy about that. But you were also a little worried. What exactly went on the underground?

You heard the heavy metal door to the lab slam shut. “Hey Alphys, came back to see if you needed any help.” Yep, you for sure going to stay in the storage closet. You weren’t feeling so hot, probably from what Aria said earlier. Probably.

“Chara? Oh there you are.” Sans poked his head into the storage room, where you just kind of standing around not doing anything. He leans against the door frame, chuckling. “Not to make this awkward, but usually humans have skeletons in their closet, not the other way around.” You assume the noise you made was laughing, but it was more like sharp inhaling that sounded like crying. What the hell was wrong with you?

“Alright then.” Sans’ features were pressed together in confusion about the weird noises you were making. “Did you ask Alphys about the determination serum?” Sans turns around, and you follow him. No use standing around looking stupid.

“The what?” You’ll just settle for sounding stupid instead.

“Seriously, Chara? We need to ask Alphys if it’s okay that you can use some of the serum when you need to? Because you have a bad Chara?” Sans shakes his head as enlightenment spreads over your face. He presses his hand to your back, pushing you towards where Alphys is now distractedly rushing around another package that just came in. You feel your face burn and your stomach drop and you’re just happy he’s walking behind you.

So much for the magic alcohol theory.

“Hey Al, Chara has something she wants to ask.” Sans gives you a final push. The only issue is you haven’t really thought how you were going to ask Alphys considered she didn’t actually know about bad Chara. She smiles meekly, waiting for your questions.

“Uh, well…Frisk…when I went to see them…told me that you have a determination serum that…um…” Poor Alphys looked so confused as you stumble through a possible cause for needing more determination. You give Sans a pleading look and he does his odd eye rolling thing.

“She wants to know if it’s okay for her have some determination serum when she’s not feeling to _soul-full_ , you know?” Sans quickly improvises. Alphys gives half a shrug.

“S-sure. Just ask me before you t-take any so I can put it in a s-syringe for you.” She grins and scuttles away, excited for her new toys.

Sans nudges you with his elbow, which kind of hurts without any cushion of muscle or skin. “Now that wasn’t so hard was it?”

“Thanks.” You give him a quick glance. “So you aren’t mad at me?”

“Mad about what? You having the bad Chara in your soul? I thought we’re already done with that.” You can Sans’ face twist into a frown. “If anything, I thought you’d be angrier at me.”

You wring your hands together. Is angry better than whatever what you feel right now? You think it might be. “No, actually. Aria just told me talking about certain other monsters is not a good thing around you…” You trail off.

You don’t expect Sans to laugh. Hard. “Did Aria tell you the hot sauce story?” You slowly nod, not sure what to make of the situation. “I did tell you not to ask me about it, fair enough. But when she did however long ago, it wasn’t an accident. She was doing it because she thought it was funny. So I just did something funny back.”

Ah, Aria had managed to leave that part out. You felt a little better knowing you wouldn’t be back to square one. Alphys scoots by with another box way too big for her. “Anyways, let’s help Alphys before she hurts herself.”

You supposed this was the Sans you didn’t get to meet before.

You like this Sans much better.

Maybe too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a little shorter than my normal chapter length, but it more served for more insight than anything.  
> You guys are either going to love or hate the next chapter, shit start getting real. 
> 
> Also, is there such thing as horror and fluff genres mixed together?


	8. Papyrus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like the roommates, in my head they're super cute all 4 of them together.   
> Papyrus is so much fun to write. It literally makes me happy when I write it. 
> 
> Here's your warning for blood.

You wake up feeling the cold seep under the part of your blankets that you kicked off. It’s a little over a month since you found out you have a second soul residing in your own, but still nothing had come of it. It was a kind of relief to know you were now headed into winter and you still okay.

It still didn’t stop you from cringing from the weird tarry taste you had developed as winter started. It happened every few days in the morning. You would ask Aria about to later to see if you were getting sick.

“Morning, sleeping beauty.” Dena was sitting in the living room, blanket draped over her shoulders as she stirred her cereal as you scuttle out of your room.

“Morning.” You respond groggily. You start walking into the kitchen dragging your feet when you catch sight of the clock on the microwave. “What are you doing up? You’re never up this early.”

Dena smirks and rolls her head. “I had a very interesting wake up call.” And as if by clockwork, Caroline, your third roommate, runs out from the hallway wearing clothes that are clearly not hers, grabs two water bottles from the kitchen muttering a quick good morning, and rushes back to her room. Dena and Caroline share a wall.

“Oh yuck, is that guy here again?” You sneer, as Dena nods her head. It was nice for Caroline and all, but this dude had the intelligence of a potato with the personality to match. He wasn’t mean or anything like that, you just weren’t a fan.

“Betcha he only lasts another 2 weeks.” Dena shoves a spoonful of her breakfast into her mouth, giving you a chipmunk grin. You roll your eyes at her and give her glance while shaking your head. Her smile falters for a second as she swallows hard.

“Woah, how did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Make your eyes flash red. That was cool, is that an experiment you’re working on? It would have been awesome for Halloween.” Your stomach feels like it was dropped into a pit.

“Eh, I don’t know what you’re talking about. You need to go back to sleep.” You quickly came up with a solution. If there was one skill you had developed from hanging out with Aria and Sans over the past month it was being able to come up with alternative answers on the fly. They were both just so good at it, and you didn’t want to be in the same situation as before with Alyphs. You didn’t like lying, but it was better than the alternative conversation. Besides, it was probably nothing.

“Lame.” Dena stuck her tongue out to indicate she was kidding. You laugh, but silently hope maybe it was nothing more than a trick of the light as you go to get dressed.

You wander through the student union a few hours later with Mercedes after a particularly painful evolutionary biology lecture. “Do you think he knows how dry his lectures are? I would like to think he does.” Mercedes pips as she pulls the glass door open for you to the food court. The professor you ended up getting for the class was certainly…bland.

“I know, I felt like we were in there so long, we probably could have gotten through at least two evolutionary cycles.” You keep walking, but realized Mercedes isn’t next to you. “Mercedes?” You turn around to find her completely red face with her hands clasped over her mouth. You follow her gaze to see a group a students congregating around what looks to be a monster. Which normally wouldn’t be that usual except this monster is a skeleton and wearing some strange battle armor. Unfortunately, this was Mercedes’ usual reaction to monsters. It was like she was star struck every time.

Stranger still, you think you know that monster. You grab Mercedes’ wrist and move closer while she makes some noises in protest but doesn’t actual stop you. Once you get a better look you figure it out.

It’s Papyrus. A very lost, very worried looking Papyrus.

“Papyrus!” You call over the crowd, grabbing his attention. He gives you a look like he doesn’t know who you are, which is fair, you’ve only met him a handful of times besides the party and it was just in passing. It takes him a second to figure out that he knows you, but as soon as he does, be bounds over startling a few students.

“Small human!” Oh that’s right, he does call you that. “I am so glad to have found you!” He wraps you up in a hug you were completely not expecting, leaving you breathless as he squeezes. He puts you back down when he notices Mercedes in full freak out mode. “Is this human alright?”

“Uh yeah. She just really likes monsters. Like really, really.” You breathe out, hand over your chest.

“AND WHY WOULD SHE NOT!” Papyrus bellows, fist pressed to his chest. “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM A GRAND MONSTER TO MARVEL!” You’re pretty sure Mercedes in on the verge of tears at this point, she’s in such shock. Monsters usually avoid her when she does this because it makes them super uncomfortable. Not Papyrus, apparently.

Papyrus rushes over to Mercedes, grasping her hands in his. You’re pretty sure she’s about to have an aneurysm, she’s shaking so damn hard. “Do not weep in my greatness! I know that it is a great honor to meet a monster as amazing as myself!” Papyrus is beaming and completely not understanding that Mercedes is about to completely fall apart at any moment.

You jump in between Papyrus and Mercedes, taking both arms and pushing Mercedes back. She starts to actually breathe again. “That was awesome.” She sniffles, still in tears.

“Papyrus,” You quickly turn as to not lose him in the union as it fills for lunch. He's already distracted by the influx. “What are you doing here? Don’t you usually come with Sans?” Papyrus pulls his hand behind his head, looking sheepish. “Sans forgot some of his notes at our home and asked if I would be so willing so bring them to the lab for him. But even with all my greatness, I cannot remember where the engineering building is.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll take you there.” You’re a little more excited than you want to admit, for reasons not nearly as noble as simply helping out Papyrus.

“SMALL HUMAN! I am forever in your debt!” Papyrus shouts. Before you can take Papyrus you have to handle poor Mercedes. You shove her into a chair at an empty table and text Dena to come get her. You call them M&M codes, for monsters and Mercedes. This isn’t exactly the first time this has happened. Or the tenth. “Dena’s going to be here in 10 minutes, don’t try to move until you feel your limbs again, okay?” you try to say as soothing as possible.

She nods her head quickly. “Sorry, Chara. I’m such nuisance.” She stares at her shoes, shoulders hunched in embarrassment. You smile at her. “Don’t worry, that’s what friends are for right? You’ll get over this eventually. But for now, we’ll take care of you.” She gives you a crooked smile before you walk off to take Papyrus across campus.

“Bye Chara. Uh, b-bye Papyrus.” She squeaks out. Papyrus waves to her in the most boisterous manner possible. Wow, she’d never actually spoken words to monster before. Maybe there was hope for her yet.

“Please do not mention to my brother that I was lost. It would only worry him.” Papyrus says and you both walk out in the cold. It wasn’t normally this chilly this early in the year. Just lucky, you guess.

“You have my word.” You watch a puff of wintery smoke leave with your words. “Ah, yes!” Papyrus responds. He’s practically marching which makes it hard for you to stay in the lead. “Sans does say many good things about you small human! You are very trustworthy I think!”

You feel your face heat up, which isn’t totally unwelcome in the cold. You turn your face into your jacket so Papyrus can’t see. “Sans says stuff about me?” You try to sound as uninterested as possible.

“Oh yes! My brother does not get close to very many humans!” He beams. Not exactly the answer you were looking for, but not a bad answer either. You don’t know Papyrus very well, so you don’t press on about it.

But you can’t say it wasn’t since to hear.

You rarely went into the engineering building, mostly because you had no classes there. It was very modern looking with slick, curved walls and floor to ceiling windows. Papyrus lead the way once you were inside. Much like the medical sciences building, the research offices were in a twisted maze of hallways.

You motion for Papyrus to stay behind the door, as you knock. Sans cracks it open, looking surprised to see you there. “Chara?”

“I brought you a gift!” You practically shout. You were mostly done being the phase where everything made you act like an idiot around Sans. But not completely over it.

“IT IS I, YOUR BROTHER! THE BEST SURPRISE!” Papyrus jumps out from behind the door, causing Sans to laugh along with Papyrus’ cackling. You knew that was a good idea.

Sans brings you into the lab. It’s significantly smaller than the lab you work in with Alphys, but it’s filled with even crazier devices if that’s possible. You’ve never seen anything like these before. Sans tells you it’s fine if you want to walk around and look, so you take him up on the offer.

A certain machine in in particular catches your attention. It’s situated around a corner so you can’t see the main lab area anymore, but you can still hear Papyrus and Sans talking from where you are, and it probably won’t hurt to just check it out. It’s tall, sort of shaped like a telephone booth from a long time ago with an odd green tint to the metal. It actually looks fairly old, and a little beat up compared to the rest of the equipment which is all pretty new. You run a hand along the surface, the metal cool to the touch.

You wonder why you’re so interested in this machine, it’s not even that cool looking. You find that one of the walls is actually a door and you quietly shuffle inside. The innards of the machine is a stark juxtaposition to the outside. There’s a large silvery screen flanked by a dashboard filled with nobs and leavers looking like it came straight out of a bad psi-fi movie. It looks like there was an attempt to restore it a few times with a few tools strewn about, though there a very fine layer of a dust collecting on the dashboard and keyboards. You realize as you slide your hand across some larger buttons you don’t actually know what Sans does in this lab.

For some reason you’re having a little bit of trouble breathing. Too much dust, you think. You slide your hand across a nob, which makes a little light flick on. You immediately turn it off. It gives you an odd feeling in your chest, maybe like guilt? You immediately feel strange, like you’ve come down with a fever complete with body aches. You decide you’ve done enough snooping and open the door to head back to the others.

The next thing you know, you’re thrashing around in Papyrus’ arms and you don’t know why. He has your arms locked behind your head, and you can see there’s blood on the floor. You fall limp as Papyrus takes a deep breath in relief. “Small human, what is going on?” His voice is wracked with worry and for the second time you aren’t sure why. He lowers you down and you realize your entire body hurts, especially your hands, arms and your face. Your peripheral vision is also flanked with a hazy blackness. There are deep cuts and bruises along knife edge and throughout your palms like you were pounding at something, blood still seeping out from some of the wounds.  

“Chara!” Sans yells and you look up. The machine you were looking at now has smoke coming from the inside and parts are scatters all over the place. He storms toward you looking angrier than you’ve ever seen him. “What the fuck do you think you're doing?!” He grips the edge of your jacket at the collar.

“Sans,” Papyrus tries to approach but Sans is having none of it. “What are you trying to do?!” He shouts at you.

“I don’t know!” You cry, trying to release yourself from Sans’ grip, but he’s holding on way to hard. You can hear the fabric starting to tear every time you try to move back. “I was just standing in there and the next thing I know, Papyrus had me!”

Sans’ facial expression changes from rage to relief. “You’re back.” He says to himself. You take a sharp inhale. Oh no. He lets you go.

“Papyrus.” Sans tries to relax his voice, but it’s obvious he’s tense as hell. “Thanks for bringing me my stuff. I’m going to take Chara to see Alphys to make sure she’s okay, is that good?” Papyrus nods, but pokes his head around the door to give Sans a nervous glimpse before leaving. “Are you sure everything is okay brother?” Sans gives him a half-hearted thumbs up. Papyrus doesn’t seem happy with it, but he goes anyways.  

Sans puts his hands over your shoulders. “You’re our Chara, right?”

“I sure hope so.” You respond weakly, shoulders achy where Sans’ has is weight pressed down. Sans relaxes for a second, before wrapping one his hands around yours to pull you out of his lab. Which you apparently just tried to destroy. Maybe you would have elicited another action if your hand didn’t sear with pain and if you could actually walk. Your knees immediately buckle under you, sending you straight to the floor. You’re pretty sure you’re sitting a small puddle of your own blood.

“Looks like the bad Chara did a number on you too.” You still have his hand, but much to your continuing dismay he lets go. He then turns around and kneels on the floor. “Hop on, we gotta get you to the lab.” You do your best to crawl onto Sans’ back but he ends up kind of flipping you forward so he had a better grip. He carries you like you weigh nothing.

As you leave from the back of the building towards the parking lot, try to remember what happened, but nothing comes. “I’m so sorry, Sans.” You mutter into his back.

“Don’t worry about it, I can always fix the machine. It’s wasn’t your fault anyways. We’ve got more important things to worry about.”

You want to find comfort somewhere in those words, but all you can feel is fear and pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that went straight to hell.


	9. Arrival

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't focus on other things until I put it here, so here you go! 
> 
> Warning for graphic imagery

Sans drops you into the passenger’s seat an old, sky blue hatchback. You hiss when you hit the worn fabric of the seat. It’s a stark contrast to his motorcycle, you think. Your vision is going in an out and you think you see blood all over Sans’ lab coat. How much were you actually bleeding? You should probably apologize for that, but you don’t have the energy.

Sans jumps into the driver’s seat, but rather than get going he calls someone.

“Hey.” His voice is low, and you can just barely make out the person on the other line. It’s Aria. “We, uh, had an incident.” You can hear her shouting over the phone, but you don’t know what she’s saying. It still kind of early in the day, and the sun is hurting your eyes so you shut them. He quickly finishes the conversation which you stop paying attention to midway through.

“Dammit it.” Sans pulls his hand over his scalp like he had hair. He looks over at you and shakes your shoulder harder than you would have liked. “Don’t go to sleep, got it?” Skeletons are weird, you think. “Alphys isn’t in the lab. Aria said she’ll do the injection. It’s the only option we have for now unfortunately.” You don’t respond, causing Sans to make a nervous grunt and start the car.

The drive was short but it still hurt. You felt every bump in the road, since Sans’ car didn’t have the best shock absorbers. Every time you open your eyes, hazy blackness encroaches further into your vision. He pulls up to the front entrance of the medical sciences where you can see Aria rushing outside, but she has someone with her. You don’t remember their name, but you remember him vaguely from the party. He’s a big dude.

Aria’s friend opens the door on your side and hoists you out of the car, causing Sans to shout something that sounds like be careful. Eh, maybe you’re hallucinating. As they rush to you to the lab, you go in and out of consciousness and wonder what happens each time it goes black.  

You know when you’re in the lab because it smells like weird metal and alcohol. “Damn it, Chara!” Oh, you heard that. Your eyes flutter open. She’s gripping your arms. Aria’s not the most composed person in the world, but she looks like a complete wreck at this moment. You assume you must look even worse. After a second you realize your vision is coated in blue.

“God, I thought she was going to kill Manny. Can you keep your magic stable for like 10 second, she’s going to keep losing blood if you don’t!” Aria turns around and starts fumbling with some vials. You can hear glass clanking together. You can’t move at all, not that you really want to.

“I’m doing the best I can, alright? This is a fucking mess. Everything was going fine. What the hell happened?” You can hear Sans, but you can’t see him.

The blue relents for a second, and you can feel Aria grab your arm. “Hell if I know! Fuck, I’ve only done this like twice. Sorry Chara, you’re gonna have one nasty bruise after this.”

The needle burns like fire as it slides under your skin and you can feel it when Aria pushes the liquid from the syringe into you. Instantly, your vision comes back to you, except everything looks like it’s been vastly over saturated. Air rushes back into your lungs and your pain has evaporated. But it only lasts a second before you slump forward. Aria catches you on your way down.

“What’s going on?” Your words are a stringy mess. Aria lowers you to the floor so you can sit up. There’s blood all over her. You look down. There’s blood all over you.

“Thank god, it worked.” Aria stands up, yanking off her blood stained jacket and throwing into a heap on the floor. “I’m gonna go get bandages, you’re still bleeding a little bit. Don’t move too much. Watch her.” Aria motions for Sans, who sits down next to you. She rushes out of the room.

“Sans,” You keep your eyes focused on the floor. “What did I do? What happened?” To your surprise, Sans wraps one of his arms around you. You would think you should be blushing, but you’ve lost too much blood for such trivial biological functions. “You know you’re shaking, right?” Sans says in reply to your astounded expression.

“I think you have an idea of what happened.” He starts. You do have idea. But you’re afraid of the whole story. “I’m not exactly sure what happened while you in the back by yourself, but all of a sudden there was this high pitched laughing and smashing. Papyrus and I ran over to see you ripping apart one of my old machines. I didn’t know what happening until you turned around. The look on your face…it was the exact same as the times Frisk was possessed and has killed everyone. It’s the most terrifying thing I’ve seen since we came to surface.” Sans take his hand and rubs your shoulder with it. His other hand is over his mouth like he’s thinking about how to continue. You’re shaking harder than you were before.

“Your eyes were practically glowing red. I knew you weren’t you anymore. When we tried to stop you, you…well the bad Chara I guess, grabbed you a piece of shrapnel and immediately stabbed your arm. They said if we came any closer they had no problem completely disfiguring their new body. Your body. I had to use magic on you, I try not to use it on humans when I can avoid it. But there was no way we could avoid it. But they managed to cut your face before I had them. I was pretty mad about that one.” Sans chuckles, but it’s sad laugher. You raise a hand to your face, feeling slick blood as you trace over a ragged edge which spans the angle of your jaw to you temple.

“Once you came back for a little, I rushed you here. Aria’s friend helped get you up here, but you almost broke his ribs while you were…phasing in and out. We had to tell him someone drugged you and we had the antidote in the lab.” You press yourself to Sans’ side, which feels strange because it’s mostly bone. You don’t really care though.

“But we got you back. That’s what counts.” Even though you’re sure you don’t have anything left in you, tears start flooding down your face. And it’s not a cute cry either. It’s the kind where you're heaving and your leaking from just about every hole in your face, complete with choked sobs and incremental apologies. Sans pulls you into a haphazard hug, so your face is pressed against his chest so that you can make an even worse mess of his clothes.

You’re not sure how long the both of your just sit there pressed up against the wall while you sob. You never realized how afraid you should be of the thing inside of your soul. You had become so good at avoiding things that you didn’t want to think about it finally back lashed on you 100 fold. Sans doesn’t say anything to you and just lets you cry until Aria comes back.

She stumbles into the room, arms filled with clean white bandages and a few bottles. “You would think we’re in a damn medical school it would be easier to find this shit.” She kicks the door shut and drops her material on the closest table. “Chara, I need you to…uh, did I miss something?” Sans rolls you out from your spot where’s there’s now a wet spot.

Aria sighs when she sees how much a mess you are. She grabs a few things and starts getting to work without saying anything. She works methodically, but tries to be as gentle as possible. You want to cry out when she uses alcohol and peroxide over your wounds, but you’re completely cried out. Sans stays next you with his eyes closed, but he’s for sure not sleeping.

“Well,” Aria pats her hands together indicating she’s finished. “It’s not pretty, but it’ll do. Nothing was cut too deep. You shouldn’t scar.” She takes one last bandage and covers the cut on your face, smoothing it out. You look up under your lids. “I know that’s not really the problem.” Aria sits back on her feet.

“You did what you could.” Sans’ voice is worn. “I’ll take her to my house until she’s feeling better. We freaked Papyrus out pretty badly I’m sure. Woulda jumped right out of his skin if he had any.” He nudges you. You smile to the best of your ability. Aria shakes her head through a strained laugh.

It takes about half an hour to get you back downstairs and into Sans’ car. You pass Aria’s friend Manny in the lobby with ice packs over his shirt and try to apologize, but he waves you off. He said he was more impressed that someone so small could pack such a punch.

Aria doesn’t come with you. She does say that if anything happens call her and she’ll be there as fast as she can. “First time I’ll be on call.” She smiles big when she says it, but you can see how worried she is.

The ride is dead silent. Sans keeps nervously glancing over at you, like you’re going to fall apart. You actually feel a lot better than before, but you’re still sore. You just don’t know what to say.

Actually, screw it. You were just possessed, you can say whatever you want.

“This is going to happen again, isn’t it?” You raise your eyebrows when you ask. “We don’t know why it happened this time.” You continue, thumbing the edges of your hair. “So by that logic…” You trail off.

Sans takes a deep breath. “I don’t know. Giving you more determine serum might help. Like consistently.”

“And I’ll have to take it forever?” You look down at the spot where Aria injected you. It’s already turning a nasty shade of purple. One more accent to how marred you already look.

Sans pulls the car up to his and Papyrus’ house and shuts the car off. “I really don’t know. It didn’t feel like Chara was getting any stronger. I feel like we’re missing something.” Sans pauses. “You know what? Let’s just get you inside, alright? We can figure it out another time.”

Why is it that every time you end up in Sans’s and Papyrus’ house, something is wrong with you? It’s always a horrible imposition. But it doesn’t stop Papyrus rushes to the door, yanking it open as Sans’ fumbles with his keys, scooping you up. Sans immediately ushers Papyrus to put you down. He apologizes for his actions and is glad you’re alright.

“Poor small human!” You’re sitting on the same couch as the night of the party, but luckily there’s no feeling of being in the middle of the ocean like last time. You smile brighter than you have in the past few hours as Papyrus hands you what sort of looks like hot chocolate except it looks like it’s mostly froth. You take a sip. You stand correct. It’s basically all froth. “Thanks, Papyrus. It’s really good.”

“It is very fortunate that you are mostly unharmed! My brother would have been very sad if something happened to you! I do not like to see Sans sad.” Papyrus laments, with a single tear in his eye. You purse your lips together, trying to hide another smile.

“Papyrus, you trying to slander me or what?” Sans walks up, bottle of ketchup in hand changed into clothes not drenched in your blood. He sounds normal, but there’s this weird blue coloration splayed across his face. You’re not sure what it is. He throws something towards you, but you aren’t in any place to try to catch it so if just drift over you. Blue blocks your vision.

“Is this your jacket?” You pull it off your face. “It’s a clean one, don’t worry. I’m guessing your still pretty cold from losing so much blood. Sorry to say I think your jacket won’t live to tell the tale.” He holds up your favorite parka, which has huge tears in the arms and is soaked in blood, which looks like maybe someone tried to wash it off. You say goodbye to it before Sans throws it in the trash. Papyrus tells you it’s okay to visit the trash can if you miss your jacket.

Papyrus puts on a video of the robot idol you’ve seen pretty much everywhere in the past few years while the three of you wait around for you to feel good enough to go home. It seems to be older than the robot’s more recently exploits, which means it must be from when they were still underground.

You’re still on the couch, wrapped up in Sans jacket which is much too big for you despite the fact that he’s only a couple of inches taller than you. He’s sitting next to you watching the moving without interest while Papyrus is completely enraptured. He must have seen it too many times before because he’s mutter all the lines as they come. It’s already dark out, and the room in just lit up by the TV and the weak fluoresce from the kitchen.

You pick your head up when you feel something snake around your hand, even though it’s mostly covered by the jacket. It’s a texture you’re not use to, so you glance down. You shudder when you realize it’s Sans’ hand. You’re eye shoot up to him to make sure it not an accident. He doesn’t turn his head, but he gives you a quick glance the edges of his mouth pulled into a slight smile. Yep, intentional.

You and he stay that way until the movie is over. He gets up, freeing your hand and asks if you’re okay to go home. You nod.

You know you’re in hell right now. But hell has its own silver lining, you think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was actually emotionally taxing for me to write.


	10. Chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for all the wonderful comments (and fanart??), I'm so glad you like it so far! 
> 
> I really fought with this chapter, which is why it took a while. But I can be nice to Chara sometimes.

“Oh my god! Chara!” Dena yanks you inside by the lapels of Sans’ jacket. He had dropped you off in front of your apartment, but you told him not to walk you upstairs. It would probably only cause more issues if you showed up bloody and bruised in the company of a skeleton. Your roommates tend to scare easy.

“Holy shit, are you okay?” Caroline practically throws herself from one of the barstools in front of the kitchen to rush over. Mercedes pokes her head from around the corner where the bedrooms are and makes a horrified gasp. Geez, did you look that terrible?

You try to wave them off, but between the three of them you just have no chance of getting off so easily. “Chara, come on. You can’t just show up back here looking like you got run over by a truck with clothes that aren’t even yours,” Dena grabs at the sleeve of Sans’ jacket as she pushes you to sit on the couch, which you yank back from her grip. “And not tell us what’s going!”

“Someone drugged something I ate. I don’t know who. I passed out and fell.” You sort of choke out the words, more because you were upset about lying rather than the event actually happening. You took a quick second to study each other their reactions. Caroline and Mercedes have shock smeared across their faces. Dena, on the other hand looks less convinced. “Why didn’t you go to the hospital?” She says calmly, but she’s trying to search you for whatever the truth is.

“Aria and Sans put me back together. I don’t want to talk about it.” You shrunk back, hoping she wouldn’t pry any further. You knew if she did, your story would fall apart. You shoot Caroline puppy dog eyes. She makes a squeaking noise and comes to your rescue. “Dena, we can talk about it later. She just needs to take a shower and go to bed!” She jumps next to you, squeezing you into a hard hug. It’s fairly painful, but you deal with your savior’s tough love and make sure not to make eye contact with Dena again.

The next day you try to sit up, but your body is so insanely sore you barely make it into the kitchen in one piece. Mercedes pleads for you not to go anywhere and just take the next few days off. You figure that’s okay, it’s only Thursday and you don’t have anything mandatory besides working at the lab. You stagger back to your room and crawl back into bed.

Someone is banging on your door. You open one eye, the blaring red numbers of your alarm clock telling you it’s the middle of the afternoon. A groggy noise escapes your throat, as Caroline pops her head in.

“Hey. You awake?” She says softly, and you nod pushing yourself up from your position. She reaches in to the best of her ability to hit the light switch. She was the only person you knew who was shorter than you.

Apparently you fell asleep on your stomach, which only made you more sore. “Okay good. Um,” She nervously twirls her hair before deciding on the rest of the conversation. “This is going to sound really weird, but there’s a skeleton asking for you. He says he’s Sans, but he might also be the grim reaper so I’m not letting him yet.”

“What?” You’re slightly more alert now, slamming your hand on your nightstand, hunting for your phone. Sure enough you have like 20 texts, a couple from Aria, but most from Sans. They’re mostly along the lines of;

“You feelin’ ok?”

“You gonna answer?”

“If you don’t I’ll come over.”

“Guess I’ll give roommates a good scare. See you in 15.”

The little bit from Aria say whenever you want, she’ll come over to change the bandages out. You text her back quickly to say she’s good to come whenever.

“What should I do?” Caroline whines, rapping her fingers on your door. “Yeah, he’s a friend. It’s okay.” You quickly tie your hair back and try to smooth it out. “Also, I think the inviting in the house thing is for vampires.” You scoop up an old sweater from the floor and shove it over your head. You notice Sans’ hooded jacket at the end of your bed and kick it off.

“Skeleton, vampire, I’m not taking my chances either way.” She flips her hair and walks out of your room. Caroline tries hard, she really does. But you’re not sure if she’s every really going be able to figure out which monsters are real and which ones only exist in stories.

She leaves your door cracked open. You shrink back against the wall, pulling your green comforter around you giving your room a once over. You’re not home much so it’s not a terrible mess, but having Sans come into your room at all? That’s kind of…nerve-wracking.

“Good to know you’re alive.” Sans half knocks, half opens the door. “The little blonde one for sure thought I was some kind of _cuh-reaper_.” Sans accentuates the last word, giving you a quick wink.

“That was a stretch.” You shake your head, but you still can’t help but laugh.

He throws a plastic bag onto your bed. “What are you talking about, it was _killer_.” He glances around your room, which makes your feel a little self-conscious. You’ve only been living there since the start of the semester and was scarcely decorated, bar the small bookshelf next your desk and a few pictures pinned to the wall. He walks in twists your computer chair around, sitting it backwards and facing you.

You turn your attention back to the bag. “What’s that?” You shuffle forward keeping the blanket wrapped around you. Sans shrugs as you pull the bag toward you. It’s filled with candy.

“Figured you needed a pick-me-up after yesterday. Figured sweets would help the sweet Chara, huh?” Sans crosses his arms over the chair and rest his head in the crook of his arms looking pleased with himself.

You can feel you face heating up as you start to dig around the bag, deciding on some kind of chocolate bar. You scoot back to your spot as fast you can, but the lax part of the blanket flops over your face. Before you pull it back, you sort of sink into the bed further on one side. You pull the blanket back just enough so you can see what is it is, even though you already know.

How did Sans even get there so fast? Not that it mattered, since you were sure that if you didn’t eat the chocolate now you’d have fondue in the next few minutes.

“Want me to get off? Probably should have asked first.” He asks, and even though he can’t see your face you shake your head hard enough that he’s sure to see it under the blanket. You had to adjust your eyes for a second, due to Sans pulling back the deep green fabric of your comforter from your head.

Unfortunately for you, you were in the middle of trying to eat as much of the chocolate as you could before it melted. So there you sat, cheeks puffy with half a bar shoved into your face. Sans starts to crack up, shaking so much it was moving the bed. Oh, this literally couldn’t be any worse.

“Damn, why are so freakin’ cute?” You can hear the sound of your teeth clamping down into each other. A hand flew over your mouth to make sure you hadn’t actually broken your teeth. You mostly just feel the rough fabric of your bandages. After a second of assessing the damage, you swivel around to figure out if Sans actually said what you thought he said.

Sans was looking at you out of the corner of his eye with one of the pin pricks of light trained right on you. There was also that strange blue coloring again…holy crap he’s blushing! That’s what that is! He looks kind of surprised with himself, almost like he’s waiting for you to say something. But your brain is currently switched to off.

“Uh…listen. I’m sorry about what happened yesterday. I should have seen it coming. I’m sure how, but I should have stopped it before it even happened. You shouldn’t have gotten hurt in the first place.”

You sunk back into the wall. “Sans…I don’t think…”

“Chara? Are you in there?” Both you and Sans jump at the voice. It’s Mercedes. You’re not sure if either of you are breathing. Does Sans even need to breathe? Do any monsters need to breathe?

After a few seconds of silence, you remember you need to respond. “Y-yeah. What’s up, Mercedes?”

“A friend of yours is here. She says she’s going to change your bandages. Also, Papyrus is here! I actually said hi!” You could hear the excitement in Mercedes voice, but you were distracted by Sans cursing to himself. “But, Caroline is talking to them now.” She continues, sounding a little dejected. But once again, Sans distracts you with a burst of white light.

“What the…uh yeah!” You try to keep your voice steady. “T-that’s awesome! They can come in if they want.” Sans was back in computer chair again. What the hell was that?

Papyrus rushes into the room first carrying one of those tote bags from the grocery store filled with fresh wraps and cotton. “Small human! The tall human is allowing me to aid her in dressing your wounds! Another skill to add to the repertoire of the great Papyrus!”

Aria sauntered behind, her face wrenched into a smile. But you could tell she wasn’t happy. You glance over to Sans, who has his head tucked into the crook of his elbow. Was he in trouble? Were you?

“Hey Chara.” She slowly drags open the plastic bag, peering in. Her face is stoic. “Papyrus, can you take off the old bandages and clean up any dry blood. I need to talk to Sans real quick.” Papyrus salutes her and before you can say anything, Papyrus is diligently working at pulling off the wraps and quickly but as gently as he can. “Come on, Sans.”

“What, you gonna _shaft_ me?”

“Sans.”

Reluctantly, Sans peels himself from the chair and follows Aria out of your room.

“Papyrus, wait!” You flail your hands in the air, until Papyrus relents. “Small human, is something wrong?” Before he can start again, you jump off the bed and slide yourself under your desk. There, you flick open a small vent which leads into the hallway, and partially block it so Papyrus can’t see. You didn’t like using the vent to spy, but you had a feeling this involves you.

You present Papyrus with your arms. “I would rather sit here. Is that okay?”

“Oh was that all? Of course small human! I am always up for a more challenging situation!” Papyrus shouts, and you pray they can’t hear you from the inside. Papyrus is too engrossed in his work to hear anyways.  

“Sans, what the hell is the matter with you?” You hear Aria hiss. You can hear her pacing around Sans.

“Plenty of things. Where do you want me to start?” Sans is trying to sound non-chalant, but the unmistakable tinge of anger is in his voice.

“You know what I’m talking about, dammit. I almost flipped my shit when Papyrus said you came here on your own. You’re seriously going to do this?”

“I’m not doing anything.”

“Oh please. Sure, it’s not your usual thing of ‘easy’” Aria saturates the word so it sound almost disgusting. “But I know you. Now isn’t the time or place and Chara isn’t the person.” You try to get a better look through the vent, but Papyrus has too strong of a handle on your arms. He has one arm completely undone. You grimace at the sight of coagulated blood all over your skin. But Aria was right, most of the cuts are already closing.

You turn you attention back at the vent. “Maybe I’m not going for ‘easy’.” Sans repeats Aria’s tone. You can hear her make an exasperated noise.

“I’ve never gotten in your way before. Only bitched you out after. I’m getting in the way now because this is a bad idea. Back off, Sans.”

You can feel a lump forming in your throat. What was all of that supposed to mean? Did Sans actually…dare you even think it, like you? But what was Aria talking about? The memory of the conversation with bartender at Grillby’s rushes into your head. You’re too sore for this kind of stuff right now, you decide. You can’t even ask, you’re not supposed to know any of this.

You hear you door knob jingle. You shift your weight so you’re completely covering the vent with your back. “Hey Chara…what are you doing under there?”

“Papyrus wanted more of a challenge.” Flawless.

“Whatever floats your boat. Papyrus move a bit, let me help. You’re doing a good job.” Aria sits down next to Papyrus to make sure he’s not roughing you up, and giving him more praise when she sees your arms are still attached. You mentally and sarcastically thank her for giving you quality healthcare. You make eye contact with her for a second. She gives you a sturdy grin and keeps working.

Sans trudges back into the room and drops himself onto the edge of your bed in a huff. The only other time you had seen Sans act this way was when you…uh…threw up on him. And he still hated you then.

Talk about a 180 degree turnaround. You try to keep yourself from turning red thinking about it.

Mercedes and Caroline peer over the door frame. “C-can we come in?” Mercedes voice is shaky and she immediately withdraws when she sees Sans. Caroline is already halfway through the door. “Yeah, you guys can come in. Will you be okay Mercedes?” How ironic. Here you are being put back together with tape and you’re worried about Mercedes.

She nods fervently, but you can see tears starting to form. She sits on the rolling chair far enough away that she doesn’t panic too much. Caroline, on the other hand, opts to drop down next to Papyrus after seeing Sans’ scowl and starts asking him questions. Papyrus loves it.

You lean back into the wall. Maybe one of these days you’d figure out what was going on. But for now, this was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'll just add some Aria yelling at Sans because that's always fun. 
> 
> I'm under the impression Toriel maybe one of the only ones with healing magic, in case anyone was wondering why no one just heals Chara. I also figure a compromise with humans and monsters is that they don't use magic very often in general.


	11. Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DENA HAS ALL THE SASS
> 
> I apologize in advance for my nerd-out at the end, but I've been trying to figure out when do this so here it is!

Friday morning you feel significantly less sore, so you try your hand at making your own breakfast. It’s just eggs but considering you can’t fully grip anything just yet, it’s still a challenge. As usual, Mercedes is the only one up in the morning. Dena and Caroline are a rare sight before 10 AM.

“Good morning Chara.” Mercedes leaves over the breakfast bar, but her voice sounds like it had trouble leaving her throat.

“Morning.” You can’t really turn around, you need all your focus to not drop anything. You successfully manage to smash and flip some of the eggs around.

“So, uh, promise you won’t get mad at me, okay?” She says. That’s not ominous at all. You don’t respond so she continues. “I was really worried that you were badly hurt so I might have called your mom. She’s going to be here this afternoon.”

You jump back as the pan and all your hard work hits the floor splattering everywhere. You sigh watching uncooked yolk roll into the grout between the kitchen tiles. Mercedes squeaks and recedes behind the counter. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I was just really worried! I’ll clean that up.”

“It’s okay.” You weren’t expecting that, especially from Mercedes. Maybe you should have, knowing that was something the four of you talked about when you decided to live together. “I was just surprised, you know how my mom can be…” Mercedes shuffles around into the kitchen and nods before picking up the pan. It’s dented.

You help as much as you can, but Mercedes shoos you away. You shoot a text to Aria asking if she can come over early and trade out your thick bandages for something less substantial, less scary at first glance.

“Sure. Any reason why though?” She texts back.

“For my mom.”

Your mom wasn’t a problem. Honestly, she was great. But she was a constant worrier, especially when it came to you, being the youngest of ‘her three babies’ as she liked to say. She was also a little…overzealous at times, and she liked knowing every that was going on with you. Everything. You hope that Mercedes didn’t say too much. Normally you were fine with telling her the details of your life, but currently you were in a situation way about most human’s heads. Your mom didn’t need that kind of extra stress.

Aria shows up about two hour later when all your roommates are gone for class, but you’re surprised to see Sans and Alphys behind her. “I asked Alphys to come with me...” Alphys waves shyly. It’s easy to forget she employs you. Sans’ makes a noise that would be considered clearing his throat, but without a trachea you just have to assume it’s for show. Aria rolls her eyes and points her finger at Sans. “And he decided to tag along.”

“I’m on a break.” Sans smirks, but it’s a little sheepish. Yesterday’s events seep back into your head, but you try to ignore it for now. It’s not that easy.

The three of them come inside and Aria and Sans both fall onto a couch. Aria says something in hushed tones to him, but his response is to shrug. She snarls in response. Alphys scuttles over and studies you for a moment. “A-aria told me what happened, b-but I didn’t think i-it was as bad as she said. C-can I see the bruise t-the needle left?” You roll up the sleeve to your sweater and you’re shocked by the way it looks. There’s an awful looking bruise situated right in the crook of your elbow saturated in deep purples and blues, flanked with sickly looking greens and yellows crawling down your arm.

“A-aria!” Alphys hiccups, running a cool claw along the length of the bruise.

“Okay listen!” Aria throws her hands up defensively. “I managed to get the vein on the first stick, everyone should just be happy I did that.” 

“It was a _shot_ in the dark, but I think you really _stuck it_!” Sans was already chuckling before he had even finished his joke.

“I’m going to ignore the fact you used me to make a big pun, and I’m taking it all as praise. Thanks, Sans.”  Aria shoves Sans’ shoulder, both laughing. You wonder how the two of them go from steaming mad at each other to completely normal. Well, normal for them.

Sans catches you watching and gives you a quick wink. You try to back up as a natural reaction as you feel your face heat up, but you end up recoiling forward since Alphys is still holding on to your arm.

“I-if it’s okay with you Chara, I-I can give you the shot next time and maybe t-teach you how to do it yourself.” Alphys shook her head, taking another claw and measuring the full damage.

“You should teach Aria how to do it too.” Sans interjects. Aria pulls the hood over his head and yanks on the draw strings, trapping Sans in his own hoodie. Sans just sits there, accepting his fate.

“Well look at that. I can at least close an oozing wound.”

Alphys rolls your sleeve back over your arm and places it back at your side. “I-I can’t believe either of y-you are adults.” The whole thing is ridiculous. You kind of like it though.

Okay, you really like it.

Alphys sits you down at your rarely used dining room table, which is covered in an assortment of all the roommate’s old books and filled binders, to give you another injection per Aria’s convincing. You aren’t sure how she managed it, but she did. Aria gets up to unwrap your mummified arms. They look a ton better from yesterday, surprisingly.

You never really got a good look at the determination serum the first time you had it. It’s a silvery liquid the consistency of milk that turns gold when the light hits it a certain way. Alphys uses your other arm, and with much more precision and much less pain, she pushes the serum in.

There’s an odd sensation of everything being brighter and more defined, you’re much more aware of your surroundings and where you are located in relation to everything else. The feeling settles fairly quickly as Aria starts to rewrap you with what you think is sports tape. It’s significantly lighter and much less bulky. And maybe you look a little tough, too.

“You know what’s weird? I feel like Chara’s skin is healing faster than normal.” She says, tearing the tape with her teeth. “Like her hands aren’t as scabbed up as they were yesterday. Lucky you.”

“D-determination does g-good things for humans. A faster r-recovery time might be one of t-them.” Alphys replies, putting away her supplies. She almost drops them when someone starts banging on your front door. Sans yanks himself out from his hoodie prison and Aria almost hit the roof, she was so badly startled.

You took a deep breath, you were all wrapped up just in time. Maybe there would be less of a scene.  

Aria opens the door and she rushes in, almost running over Alphys in the process despite the fact that she’s your size. She pulls you into a hug that’s much too hard. “Chara! My poor baby! Are you alright? Look at you! You’re just a mess! Why didn’t you immediately call me? Poor thing!”

“Hi mom.” You squeak out. She has her hands ensnared around your upper arms and pushes back to get an actual look at you.

She lets out a sob. “You never think it will happen to your child! Horrible!” Your mom turns you around to sit you down and finally catches sight of the living room. She freezes half holding you over the chair. Alphys and Sans give each other worried glances and you can see Aria is chewing on her bottom lip as they wait for a response.

“And who are these lovely people? And lovely monsters?” You can feel the tension leave the room, but you already knew it would be fine. She whips around and makes her way to each individual, introducing herself.

“These are all new faces! What do you all do?” She’s practically beaming now.

“I-I’m actually Chara’s boss, I’m research f-faculty at the university.” Alphys swings her legs from the air chair she’s chosen. “Research for m-monster health, as I-I’m sure Ch-chara has told you.”

“I help out there, too.” Sans waves his hand above his head. “I’m also research faculty, but I also do research in quantum physics. It’s not very interesting.” Sans crosses one leg over his knee. You know he looks much too pleased with himself to actually believe his work is uninteresting, but at least now you know what he actually does. You’re impressed but damn if you’re going to let it show on your face. The grin on Sans’ face tell you that you failed that endeavor.

Aria grins. “And I’m a medical student. Who should probably be studying.” She puts her head in her hands, attempting to look wistful.

Your mother is extraordinarily pleased with your current situation. For most kids your age hanging out with anyone like your present company would be impressive, at least on paper. But you knew better.

It seems that all is going well, it’s just everyday chit chat. Every once in a while you receive a pat on the head for “being such a smart kid” or “working so hard, making your family proud”. It’s a little embarrassing but as long as she’s happy and not freaking out its fine. She seems to have already dropped the situation at hand which is simply a relief.

The door creaks open, with Dena and another friend carrying fistfuls of grocery bags. “Hey, Chara! I didn’t know your mom was going to be here! Nice to see you again!” She coos as her friend shuffles past organize out what they bought. Dena tended to have friends over and make way too much food, which was perfectly fine with you.

Except something was off. Dena was just a little too peppy as she butters up your mom. Her grin at the moment could rival Sans’. And then you realize. Mercedes may have called your mom, but you knew where she got the idea from. Dena knew you lied to her and she was getting you back at you. You were so going to make her pay for this.

“You know what I’ve always found so interesting? Chara’s name. It’s so original. How did you come up with it?” Dena pours on the sap, knowing full well you’ve never been the biggest fan of your name. Especially now, but she didn’t know that. It was still annoying as hell.

“Oh! Well that’s actually an interesting story behind naming my little Chara!”

“What!? You always just told me you wanted me to be different.” What was happening to your life? Did you know anything anymore?

“No honey. That was what I told you when you whined about your name in grade school.”

You slumped back in your chair, huffing. She wasn’t wrong but still. But so like your mom to pull the ‘you never asked’ card.

Your mom rolls her eyes at your mini temper tantrum. “Anyways, I actually learned about the name from my grandmother. She had an old photo album with some relatives who lived decades before even her. One was a very old photo of one of her grandparents and all their siblings. It was normal to have such large families then. They each had their name scrawled at the bottom. One of her grandparents siblings was named Chara, and I really enjoyed them name.”

Your stomach starts twisting into knots, threating to bring up the cereal you had to settle for this morning. Without moving your head, you lock onto Sans who was giving you a similar nauseated look.

“She did say that the child had been lost during an outing at Mt. Ebott actually. They never found the poor thing. But even though you’re the youngest I felt the name matched you the best.” Your mom was all smiles, sitting neatly and completely unperturbed.

Aria was a complete deer-in-the-headlights, but at least Sans was trying to maintain composure and look interested. You sat up like your spine had become a metal rod with a smile so forced it was hurting your face.

“R-really?” Alphys pips, sounding as excited as your mom looks. Sans’ face immediately falls. “That c-child ended up living with the r-royal family in the underground, i-if my hunch is correct! They were a symbol of h-hope that one day t-the monsters would come back to the s-surface. Chara, I-I believe you’re r-related to the Chara who fell in the underground! I-I think Toriel would l-love to know that!”

“Well that’s just amazing! See, Chara?” Your mom continues talking about the underground with Alphys, but your teeth are clenched so hard together it’s starting to seep into a headache. The lights in Sans eyes are barely lit and you assume a similar, more human reaction from Aria but she’s actually got her eyes rolled back and she’s moving her hands around like she’s trying to figure something out.

All of a sudden, and scaring the crap out of everyone around, Aria jumps up shouting something but it comes out as gibbery mess of words. “Chara, come here!” She actually and literally runs over to you, skidding on the carpet before regaining her balance. You stand up just in time for Aria to grab the sleeve of your sweater, hauling you to the front door. “Sorry! Urgent, uh, medical student stuff! Be right back!” She yanks you out and slams the front door shut.

You try to talk but all that comes out is a strained screech, which is pretty much the way you feel right now.

“Yeah, I know.” Aria is pulling at her own hands. You hope no one walks by because you both look kind of crazed. “Listen, listen. Chara, first, you have to stop, my ears are bleeding.” She grabs your shoulders because really if she didn’t stop you, you’d just keep making that noise and who wants that?  

“This totally makes sense, don’t you get it?”

“I…I’m sorry, what?”

“No, it totally does. That’s why Sans and Frisk couldn’t tell the difference between your soul and bad Chara’s! It’s why I could only see two souls and nothing else…It’s why bad Chara chose to leave Frisk! You’re a better host because you’re related! I bet they could tell how similar your souls felt and thought they could take over you easier than Frisk since your souls are almost identical!” Aria put both hands into her hair, pulling it back in excitement. “Can souls be genetically similar? Sans’ and Papyrus’ magic is pretty similar and they’re brothers and genes tend to skip generations so I wonder if you guys could even be almost the same genetically.” Aria continues on, forgetting that your even there as she plans her extensive diagnosis and work up of your apparent condition.

“Aria…” All of this is going so far over your head. “Are you telling me that I’m basically the perfect person to be possessed by a demon child because I am related to them, and that everyone besides me, you, Sans, and Frisk thinks they’re a perfect angel?” Your voice was reaching back into that screechy range, but you couldn’t help it.

“Uh…probably?” Aria flinches when she realized she was ranting on in her own excitement while you were practically shaking.

You drop, hitting the concrete floor in front of your apartment. “I’m screwed, aren’t I?”

Aria squats down and rocks on her heels so she falls back and sitting next you. “No…” She says softly. But you see her clutch her fist. “No! We’re gonna fix this. I don’t know how, but we’re going to figure it out. I swear on both my souls.” She does an X motion over her chest twice.

 You watch Aria’s display. Maybe it’s easier to be confident when you’re on the outside. But if Chara is really supposed to be a child of hope, maybe you need to start hoping more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters just keep getting longer, I need to chill. 
> 
> I hope you guys liked this one!


	12. Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this anatomy lab which is hilarious ironic and I kept laughing every time I looked up and, hey look a skeleton model judging the hell out of me. 
> 
> 2 of the 5 even lost their heads about it.
> 
> Just kidding.
> 
> I have no idea where those heads are. 
> 
> I know some of the stuff I write is a little out there so if you have questions HIT ME UP!  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/  
> It's still under construction so bare with me.

Aria’s phone rattles against the concrete through her pocket. The two of you were sitting outside your apartment staring into silent, contemplative space.

“Sans says we would go back inside.” She drops her phone into her lap. “We probably should.”  

You push yourself off the wall so that you’re standing. Aria does the same. You reach for the doorknob, but Aria wraps her hand around it blocking your way. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

You shrug. “We can’t do anything about it now.” You want to feel dread, you want to be upset. But you’re just too emotionally spent.

Aria opens the door but you can practically see the gears turning in her head. Are all medical students like this? Probably not, Aria’s pretty out there to start with.

“Is everything alright, Chara?” Worrying mother, check. Worrying faces on everyone else, also check.  

“Yeah. It wasn’t anything important.” You sit back next to her without batting an eye. You get getting too good at this. It’s a little worrying.

Your mom is content with the answer, but Sans is not. It’s been a while but he’s boring holes in the back of your head as you talk to your mother, probably because there had been a revelation he had not been part of. Every once in a while he would turn his attention to Aria who would just mutter “I will tell you later.” In an annoyed tone. He wasn’t a fan of that.

Everyone left a few hours later. For the most part it was nice. But you were right. What could you do about genetics? You were strapped with what you got, right?

Speaking of, your mom stuck around until the next day to make sure you were alright. You wouldn’t admit it out loud, but it kind of nice to be babied again.

The rest of the weekend was mostly you traversing between your bedroom and the living room. And also sitting outside of Dena’s room with Mercedes on Sunday in the morning waiting for the signal scream. You put glitter in Dena’s shower head. Revenge best served with sparkle.

You might not be the bad Chara, but that didn’t mean you were always a goody-two shoes.

It also helped to blow of some of that anxiety you had built up over the last few days. Even if Dena did chase you and lock you out of the apartment for 15 minutes.

You had never been so excited for a Monday before. You were itching to get back in the lab because you and Alphys were so close to a fully stable ethanol based solution of magic. You really wanted to be there when something happened.

It’s bad lab etiquette, but you had your head stuck inside the chem hood, leaning in while standing on a step stool. Alphys had gotten her claws on boss monster magic, which was even more volatile than the average variety. It constantly sparked up, and threated to burn through anything that wasn’t glass. Easy to say, it wasn’t exactly the safest place for you to be. But if anyone wants you to get work done, you can only reach the things in the back if your halfway inside.

“Nice view.”

“Sans?!” You jolt back, only to smash your head on the tempered glass of the hood. You stumble off the step, gripping the back of your head as pain rushed through it. You use the lab table behind you to keep your balance.

“Oh, shit!” Sans comes in front of you. You glare up at him, putting on your best pout. It didn’t hurt that bad, it was just surprising. “Didn’t mean to scare you. Didn’t think I’d get such an _explosive_ response.” He says as soon as he realizes you’re okay.

You weren’t paying too much attention at first, but Sans has hands placed on the lab table on either side of you while his body is directly in front of you. You keep your hands wrapped around the spot where you banged your head as an excuse to keep your head down.

You hear Sans shift and something cool slides under your hands. Oh god, it’s one of his hands. If your face wasn’t already red now it was the color of a maraschino cherry. He hums feeling around the back of your head. You grip loosened as he moves his fingers. “Doesn’t feel like theirs gonna be a bump.” He hums almost next to you ear. When did he get that close? “Trust me, when you grew up with baby bones Papyrus you know what a head bump feels like.”

Skull against skull. At least your skull has some cushion, you know, between your bangs and skin and such. But you’re sure that means Sans can feel how heated your entire face is. “Feels kinda like this.” He says quietly. Oh, bumping skulls. You got it. Maybe you would have thought it was a joke if he hadn’t started burring his hand into your hair, moving it in small circles. You’re breathing starts to become uneven as you push forward in a way Sans knows your reciprocating.

“Ch-chara?” It’s Alphys calling from her office downstairs. Sans is a full five feet back from you before you know it. He’s blue from his eye sockets down, holding a hand over his mouth. “That is not what I came here for…” He mutters to himself.

“Chara? A-are you over there?” Alphys calls for you again. “Be there in a second!” You shout back. Your legs are the consistency of jello at the moment. Sans starts to walk to another part of the lab. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay!” You blurt out. “It’s…fine.” You shrink down as the smile on face widens. He doesn’t say anything and once he rounds the corner he’s gone.

After a moment to catch your breath, you hop down the metal stairs and walk into Alphys’ office. It’s a strange juxtaposition to the rest of the lab, most of her office supplies are pink or yellow adored with frills or ribbons. “Is everything okay Alphys?” You opt to stand behind one of her two yellow leather chairs for guests.

“O-oh, no! N-nothing is wrong!” She happily plods over to you holding something. Her face scrunches together. “A-are you alright? You’re f-face is very r-red, are you s-still not feeling well?”

You press both hands to your face, and indeed there is still some residual warmth coming off your face. “Oh, I’m fine. I think it might just have been hot upstairs.” You rub at your cheeks to help dissipate the color. Temperature wise, it’s actually never hot anywhere in the lab. But you technically aren’t lying. It was kind of heated.

“T-that’s good to hear! I actually w-wanted to know if y-you were f-free to come to a d-dinner party Undyne and I have t-this time every year.” Alphys hands you a card that is patterned with little teal fish and dinosaur footprints. That’s adorable.

“Of course I’ll go! Sounds like a lot of fun!”

“Oh w-wait, Chara,” Alphys grabs at the end of your lab coat. “There’s s-stain here. How did you get t-this?” She thumbs at a pitch black spot. You pick up the tail to your coat. You’ve never worked with any substance like this. It’s caked on the edge and looks like a plaque. Running a finger over it, you find it’s not completely dry and slightly sticky.

“Oh, gross.” You drop the end of your coat. “I-I can have it w-washed if you l-like. I was g-going to take m-mine anyways.” Alphys offers. You take her up on it. A few more lab-coatless hours and you’re free.

It was kind of hard to focus though.

With the sun setting earlier and earlier, you hurry to make it out before it’s too dark. But Aria’s studying the lobby. So much for that plan.

“How’re the battle wounds?” She has herself smooshed into one of those oversized arm chairs.

“Better, almost no scab left.” You lift a hand to show her. “Damn, that determination serum is something else.” Aria laughs.

“Oh by the way,” A lot of humor seeps from her voice. Uh oh. “You wanna tell me why Sans ran out of here doing everything is his power to make eye contact or talk to me?” You knew she knew. You want to respond and tell her, no, nothing happened. He’s just being Sans, but you can’t force any words out.

“Thought so.” Aria flips her book closed. “That’s another issue. I’ll tell you later.” She sits up. “But for now, I think we need to talk to Alphys about the whole you being related to the other Chara. I thought about it, and we” She points back and forth between you too. “Can’t do anything, but she might be able to. She might be an asset to have about the entire thing anyways.”

“The only issue we would have is Sans. I was going to ask him, but he wouldn’t give me the time of day.” Aria shakes her head.

Oh, that’s probably you fault. But mostly his. “Why wouldn’t he want us to say anything to Alphys?”

“Because none of them remember what happened in the underground except the last time Frisk did that reset thing. I only know things because the soul that joined mine lived through a lot of the things Frisk had to deal with. And died through it.” Aria takes a heavy breath, almost like she’s having trouble breathing. She cracks both shoulders and shakes it off. “Trying to tell Alphys everything is really going to be a mess, and who knows how she’ll react. She might not even believe us. I think it will be okay, but knowing Sans he won’t even discuss it. Shit, he wouldn’t even tell me. Frisk had to tell me.”

You could see that. You barely believed Frisk when they told you and honestly, you kind of still didn’t until last week. “That makes sense, but I think we should tell her. I need all the help I can get.”

“We’ll wait until after her’s and Undyne’s dinner party. No need to stress her out when she’s already going to be freaking out about this party. And we also need to convince Sans.”

“Easier said than done, huh?” Aria nods. You wanted to think it was possible you were getting to know both Aria and Sans a lot better, but you were nowhere in the range of how well they knew each other. That was something you only earned with time. And from what it sounded like, Aria may have actually known Sans since before the monsters reached the surface. It was already dark out, so why not figure it out.

“Aria…did you know Sans while the monsters were still in the underground?”

“Hmm. Yeah.”

“How?”

“So that second soul I have? You know it belonged to one of the children who fell into Mt. Ebott.” She stops for a good minute, trying to figure out how to continue. “Sans and I don’t really talk about this to anyone. It’s hard to find the words.” There’s another long moment of silence.

“I guess long story short is that I was underground for kind of a long time before…Asgore got my soul. Sans was really the only friend I had there. For a while at least. We were both a lot younger. The memories from when I was that age sort of just blended together with the memories from the underground.”

“Wait, Asgore the king of monsters Asgore? What did he have human souls for?”

Aria freezes. “Frisk didn’t tell you about that?”

“No.” You’re basically on the edge of the chair.

“Shit, I don’t really think I should be the one to tell you. I mean…basically…to break the barrier the monsters needed seven human souls. Human souls persist after death. They didn’t need humans. Just our souls. Aria shushes you before you have a chance to react. “Don’t ask me anymore questions, please, I’m not going to talk about it here. I already said way more than I should have.”

It’s a bittersweet goodbye, you have a million questions running through your mind. Did monsters kill children? You suppose to them it would seem like a rational choice considering humans trapped them under the mountain in the first place. What would have happened if Frisk wasn’t the one who broke the barrier? Would it have been all out war on humans?

You’re about to start your normal habit of pushing it out of your mind. But you don’t. Doing that has been nothing but trouble for you. Everyone else has been trying to find solutions, trying to help. You’ve been doing nothing but trying to stay innocent to what’s happening to you. Sitting behind the driver’s seat of your car you decide it’s time to start acting like you promised Frisk you would.

You’re determined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No one is free from injuries in this story. Physical and mental.


	13. Piano

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh this chapter. What a struggle. It's kind of silly.   
> So much is happening.

“So what happens at a dinner party hosted by monsters?” It’s a valid question. You don’t to do anything offensive. You cough as Aria hits a speed bump and to your displeasure, that sour tarry taste is back to haunt you. You settled on it being gastric reflux from constant stress.

Aria put her old as hell black sports car into park with a clunk. You’re not really sure if you’re going to survive the whole ride based on the noises it makes. You’d probably be safer on the back of a motorcycle.

Alphys’ and Undyne’s house is 10 minutes away from campus in a nicer neighborhood where you assume the HOA fees are astronomical based on how amazing the lawn looks. The house is a light coffee colored one story ranch. And the mailbox is one of those big mouthed bass ones with a ribbon tied around it. It’s appropriate, you think.

“I don’t think regular monster dinner parties are different from human ones. But this isn’t really regular among monsters. Just be ready to dodge when you need to and don’t get crushed.” Aria snorts, but she’s also being completely serious. You’re not surprised but you also aren’t exactly swift on your feet. You’ve taken enough damage for a while and hope you’re not in the line of fire.

Walking up to the house, you find yourself searching for the aforementioned motorcycle. You can’t find one, but you do see a red convertible with a license plate that says ‘FSTPAP’. Question answered.

“Aria! Chara!” A tsunami of teal and fiery red hair whipped your off your feet, hoisted into a rib-crushing hug with one arm. Your feet weren’t even touching the floor. Aria was trapped in a similar place but at least she was still standing. Undyne sure was happy to see you guys.

“U-undyne, you should p-put them down.” Alphys chuckles and Undyne releases her death grip on her girlfriend’s command. “You see these two losers all the time Al! And ever since one of you decided you want to be a doctor, I’ve been missing one of my buds!” Undyne is probably the only person who you know who can successfully get Aria in a headlock and have her laughing.

Straight from the frying pan into the fire, as Frisk nearly tackles you the moment you’re free from Undyne. “Chara! I’m so happy to see you again!” Without thinking, you hug Frisk back as hard as they’re hugging you. “Me too, Frisk!” You know Aria’s been keeping them updated on what’s been happening, but for some reason it’s immensely comforting to have them near. Frisk is the only one who has any can understand exactly how you feel right now.

“I see how it is. Now you have Chara, you don’t need me.” Aria fakes a whine, and Frisk jumps straight from you to her without touching the ground. Undyne immediately joins in, smashing the air out of the two of them. “Want in, short stack?” Undyne eyes you, fangs poised into an intimidating smile ready to act on her offer, but you vehemently shake your head. “Thanks, but I’m okay here.”

There’s a boom that erupts from what you assume is the kitchen, followed by a pillar of black smoke pouring through an archway enterance maybe 30 feet from the foyer you’re currently in. Papyrus rushes out of the kitchen with Toriel in tow. “My greatest apologies, your highness!”

“It’s quite alright, Papyrus. Though I am unsure how one causes an explosion making pasta.” She takes a paper napkin and wipes some of the debris from her fur.

Sans saunters out from the kitchen, unperturbed by the layer of black soot coating his left side. “With Pap, nothing is _inpasta-ble_ , Tori.” Papyrus whines, chastising Sans though Toriel seems to have enjoyed the joke.

“Now that’s the way to cook!” Undyne hollers, while Alphys is already prepared with a fire extinguisher. Aria escapes the vice grip, but Frisk gets hauled along with Undyne as she heads to the kitchen. On the way Frisk ask if Toriel is okay, who gives them one solid yet sweet nod.

“Is it always like this?” You asked Aria, but she hasn’t completely caught her breath.

Once she does, she gives you a generous wink. “Yep. It’s like nothing else above or below ground. It’s like having a second family. I gotta remember to actually thank Sans for that one of these days.” She laughs and takes off into the kitchen, Alphys and Papyrus following behind with Sans taking the caboose. It was a mess of shouting and cookware smashing together. A clear cut case of too many cooks in the kitchen.

You start to walk down the hallway into the kitchen but Toriel stops you. “Chara, it’s wonderful to see you again.” Toriel wraps you in a warm hug, akin to Frisks’. Even though they are two completely different species you can tell that Frisk really is Toriel’s child. Nurture totally wins that battle in this case. 

“I’ve been…alright. It’s been a tough semester.” You say, using your hands to pull your jacket over what’s left of the damage to your hands. The remnants are completely gone, but it’s just easier if no one sees them.

Toriel studies you for a second, which starts to make you nervous. You remember Frisk saying that Toriel was extremely in tune with souls and that the other Chara was once her adopted child. “Well,” She takes a deep breath. “If you keep hope in your soul, I am sure things will become brighter.”

She places her paw directly over the trace outline where your face was cut before giving you a tender smile. But there’s a look in her eyes you can’t decipher. There’s a strange pang happening in your chest but you don’t have any sense of nervousness. It’s almost like something is pushing you from the inside, but it’s a similar feeling to trying to hold in tears.  

“Hey!” Undyne trudges between you and Toriel, breaking your concentration. “I’m moving everyone into the living room! Even with my girl’s best work, we’re gonna destroy the kitchen again at this rate! Wouldn’t want to leave anyone out!”

Undyne ushers the both of you in the opposite direction from from the kitchen through another archway on the other side of the foyer into a large space, divided into a living room and dining room. Everyone else enters pours out from around a corner which also leads into the kitchen. They’re actually more guests that you expect, equal parts human and monster, already sitting or standing in various locations. The one thing that catches your eye is a black lacquer baby grand piano neatly situated near a picture window.

“That’s a beautiful piano.” It’s almost a whisper but nothing escapes Undyne, apparently. “You play?!”

“Not for a couple of years, but-“ Undyne yanks you over to piano without letting you finish and plops you down on the plush piano bench.

“Let’s hear it!” She drops down next to you, waiting for you to start. Your head is in a slight fog as you just stare at her. Guest are starting to huddle around, waiting on an impromptu recital. You’re not very good with performing, it makes you anxious to be in front of too many people. Undyne grunts in annoyance as the minutes tick by in silence. “Come on? What you need me to start or something?”

Undyne starts playing a slow, drawn out melody. You can tell after a few second the sheet music is in front of you, but there’s no way you’ll be able to keep up with reading it playing right now. You’re too out of practice.

And how, exactly, does Undyne expect you to play to a song you’ve never heard before?

Except that you start playing. And playing well. You haven’t touched a piano in years and you’ve certainly never so fluid. Undyne seems pleased to know that you stepped up the challenge as you play with her. It’s almost like an out of body experience.

You realize it is. You aren’t the one who knows this song. It’s a song from the underground, though you aren’t sure why you know that. It’s your hands playing, your body moving but you aren’t the one playing this song. There’s no pain. There’s nothing feeling forced or makes you sick.

It’s a feeling of contentment.

When it’s over, Undyne pulls you in with one arm as the group claps for your duet. The only one who isn’t clapping is Frisk. A look of worry is pulled across their face. They motion for you to go into another room. “Damn shorty! Didn’t know you had it in you!” Undyne muses your hair like you’re eight and you have to squirm out of her grip. “T-thanks. I, um, need to use the bathroom.”

You run back into the area where you first came in and tip toe into the kitchen. “Frisk?” It’s one of those whisper shouts. You don’t see them, but you get a good look at the generous sized country style kitchen. Except every appliance had been heavily modified with extra metal plating, but the stove stop was currently stained black with previous cooking attempts wrong awry. It was a tank of a kitchen.

Frisk pokes their head around the corner. They shot their head around in every direction looking for ears that may eavesdrop. Once satisfied that everyone is in the living room they leave their post.

“What was that? I thought you blacked out when the other Chara takes over.” Frisk cocks their head, arms crossed. 

“I was hoping you could tell me, honestly. But I guess that’s out the window.” You pull at the ends of your hair. “It just felt like I was playing for them.”

“Chara does like to play piano.” Frisk stares at the ceiling, thinking hard. “They were always peeved because I never learned how to play. Guess they got excited because you do, but they weren’t in position to take over you again.” Frisk reasons, as they sneak over the counter pulling open a flat storage container. They pull out a bite sized cookie and pop it in their mouth. They usher you over and place another tiny cookie in your hand. Rule-breaker Frisk, who would have thought? You’re an accomplice now so you go full out and eat the cookie. It’s delicious.

“Alright smarty, how did I know the same song that Undyne knew?”

“Psh! That’s easy! Chara learned to play piano from Asgore! Undyne spent a lot of time with Asgore when she was a kid and learning to run the royal guard so he also taught her! Of course they would know the same songs.” Frisk stuck their tongue out. Had to admit, they got you there. “Chara’s always been pretty smart, I think. They were always good at figuring out how to get what they wanted.”

“You talk about Chara like they’re not so bad.” You lean against the kitchen counter as Frisk takes another cookie. “They weren’t always so bad. Once upon a time they were my mom’s and Asgore’s kid. They couldn’t have been totally bad if my mom loved them. I think a lot of…terrible things must have happened to Chara to make them hate so much. It doesn’t make them right, it doesn’t change what they did to everyone. To me. But I have to think they weren’t always so bad.” Instead of eating the cookie, Frisk passes it off you. You wonder which one of you it’s for as you take small bites of it.

“Would you just look at that, two very cute little Frisks!” A mechanical voice sing songs. A robot with accentuated curves in hot pink heels much higher than you could ever manage leans against the frame of the archway. “Just kidding. Though you must admit, the resemblance is uncanny hmm?”

Between the panache and the power strut through the kitchen you realize who it is, thanks to Papyrus. “You’re Mettaton!” You blurt sending Frisk into a flurry of giggles behind you. “Like from TV, right?” You realize there’s little puffs of steam pooling out from underneath Mettaton’s hair. “Oh darling!” He scoops you up so that you’re eye to eye with shiny metal. What was it with these people and picking you up? Last time you checked it was not acceptable to just pick up someone no matter how short they are. “I’m always glad to meet fans!” The lift turns into another lung-crushing hug. It didn’t help that Frisk was killing themselves laughing and not helping you at all.

“Sure that’s the one you really want to _sweep of their feet_?”

Mettaton practically drops from his full foot and half taller than you height, but luckily Frisk was able to pull themselves together long enough to sort of catch you as you come down. It’s more like just keeping you from hitting your head on the tile.

“Whatever do you mean, dear Sans? Is there someone else you have in mind?” Mettaton has absolutely no issues getting directly into Sans’ face. Sans doesn’t flinch. A twisted grin forms on Mettaton’s face, as he stands up straight again. “That’s what I thought. Anyways, this adorable creature as yet to tell me her name, hmm?”

You are Frisk finally manage to readjust so you’re both standing and presentable again. “I’m Chara. I’m a student at the university.”

“Of course you are darling! And so lovely!” You take a quick glance over Mettaton’s angular shoulder and the lights in Sans’ eyes are out. Aria and Papyrus walk into the kitchen and all of a sudden you’re not very interesting anymore. Mettaton takes less a fraction of a second to wrap himself around Papyrus, practically running down Aria in the process.

“What the hell!” Aria barks, but Mettaton is already too busy shoving Papyrus out of the room with one mechanical arm wrapped around his shoulders. You can see Sans grit his teeth as they leave.

“I think Mettaton would like you guys again if you apologized for making him short circuit last year during Christmas.” Frisk offers.

“You mean he didn’t like it that we rigged his light display? I thought it was so much better that way.” Aria feigns innocence, batter her eyelashes for Frisk who snorts in response.

“He didn’t need to _blow a fuse_ over it.” Aria gives Sans a high five.

Frisk sighs and picks up your hand, pressing it to their chest. “I’m sorry that you have to deal with them on a daily basis. But I’m here for you.” You may look similar, but Frisk is a lightyears ahead of you in the boldness department. You laugh. “I’m flattered.”

Undyne stomps into the kitchen, cracking a tile. You think Alphys probably should have Undyne-proofed the floor too. “What are you nerds doing in here? Come on! Let’s eat!” She opts to grab Frisk and Aria and drag them out of the kitchen, Aria yelling something about she should not have to stand for being treated this way as an almost-adult.

You’re left alone in the kitchen with Sans.

“Hey.” He says. His eyes are back to their normal pin pricks, but he looks sort of tense.

“Yeah?”

“After we eat can I talk to you? Alone?”

Maybe in another life you would might have thought this would be something good. In another time, another place…if you were another person. Maybe. But that wasn’t the case. You honestly have no idea what this could be at all.

It didn’t stop your heart from trying to lurch into your throat.

“Sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops, I compromised the story's villain.   
> And left you with a cliff hanger.   
> Whoops. 
> 
> And if anyone has any interest about updates or question or to see the most awesome fanarts, here's my tumblr  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


	14. Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to the dump because that's where I belong because I am trash.

Dinner is eventful, to put it mildly. It’s not a sit down thing, but more of a buffet style. Everyone is all over the place, but it’s interesting to watch the interactions. You think your favorite is between a golden dinosaur without arms who looks about Frisk’s age and Frisk themselves. You’re intuition about this stuff hasn’t always been the best, but you’re fairly sure the monster is trying their best to flirt with Frisk and it’s going straight over Frisk’s head. It’s cute to watch.

From across the room, Sans gestures to French doors which lead into the backyard. You give a short nod and head that way to sneak out without anyone seeing you.

It’s cold outside. Scratch that, it’s freezing. The temperature took a nose dive since you arrived, making it a poor place for a conversation. You press your arms into you’re the crooks of your elbows and huddle yourself together on the concrete bench you’ve chosen to sit on. Your other choice was a wrought-iron metal patio set which you wouldn’t go near. Cold metal is the worst.

After a few solitary and cold minutes, Sans finally walks outside.

“Sorry, I had to shake off Aria. Felt kinda shitty.”

“What’s so important, then?” You lean back against the house. You’re happy it’s dark out, because you’re trying hard to stay cool, despite saying it through chattering teeth. Sans sits down next to you, warmth radiating off him. You instinctually scoot closer, because fuck it, you’re cold.

“Was that you playing the piano earlier?” He asks, concerned. You wonder if magic can generate its own heat.

“Yes. No. It was sort of together.” White trails of smoke escapes your mouth. “That’s not important enough for you to talk to me by myself.”

Sans’ brow bone raises on one side. “What’s with the sass, huh? I’ll get to it.” He slinks back into the fuzz of his jacket, which you think is probably warmer than yours. You wonder if your old one is still in the trashcan at his house.

“I’m not being sassy, I’m cold.” You huff, burying your face into your jacket the best you can. A weight settles over your shoulders, Sans’ arm enveloping you and pulling you closer. You can’t tell if you’re less cold from being so close, or because of the heat rising to your face. “Better?” His voice is a little muffled by his jacket.

“Yeah.”

“So how did you exactly play together?”

“I’m not really sure. I asked Frisk and they said it was most likely because Chara likes to play piano but can’t take over on a whim. To be honest, as soon as I realized what was happening I just…let it happen. You probably think that was pretty stupid of me, huh?” 

“As someone who loves to take it easy, I probably would have done the same thing. Less work for me.” Sans shifts his arm so you’re forced to turn to look at him. “You know no one thinks you’re stupid, right? Especially not me. But nothing actually happened right?”

“No. They just played piano.”

You can feel the soft rumble of Sans laughing. “Guess I got all _keyed_ up for nothing. Speaking of you and me…we should probably talk about that.”

It’s silent for a long time as you can feel your heart rate pick up. What exactly does he want you to say? You know this entire thing is a bad decision, but it’s not like you chose to like a talking monster skeleton. That’s completely out of your control.

“Tell me to stop.”

You stay huddled up under Sans’ arm. He’s look away from you so you can’t see his face. “What?” Your breath is shaky.

“This isn’t supposed to be this way, you know? We’re complicating things doing…whatever is it that’s happening.” He shifts so he’s half partially facing you. You feel your chest tighten. You do know that. He takes a deep breath and then continues. “And obviously telling myself or Aria telling me to stop isn’t working. So I figure if you say, we can be done and over with it.”

You scrunch your nose. You think it’s not particularly fair that you have to be the one who decided the fate of…whatever this is.

“What are you waiting for, just say it.” Sans almost growls at the words like he’s angry, but not at you. You continue to stay quiet.

Sans’ face never been that close to you before. “Chara. Please.” The lights in eyes are dim speckles in a seemingly endless void. You bite down into your lip.

You mind is mostly thick haze at this point. Are you really going to say this? You aren’t sure what words are going to come out of your mouth. But you don’t have a choice and you have to take the gamble.

“But…” The try to take a deep breath, but all you’re greeted with is icy stabs to your throat and lungs. “I don’t want to stop.”

It’s much too quick for you to react in this weather, and it takes you a second to figure out what just lunged at you. Sans has his mouth pressed up against yours, and in a strange way it feels somewhere between smashing into teeth and kissing. It’s such a strange sensation, but not in a bad way. It’s actually not bad in any way. Sans lets up a little, since he’s close to knocking you off the bench all together.

He starts to back off, but your brain is so overloaded right now, your only option is to follow your intuition. Which makes you grab onto the lapels of Sans’ jacket and pull him back in and kiss him. Hard. You can feel Sans sharply inhale at your, frankly, very bold move. It doesn’t take him nearly as long as you to decide to continue, pulling you closer by snaking one hand around to your lower back while the other works on getting tangled in your hair. Knowing it’s a more solid situation, you release the jacket opting to wrap your arms around his neck instead.

You’re not sure how much time passes as the kisses get deeper and hands explore more than what’s kosher. A light pours into your face, making you pull back. Sans gives you a look like you’ve taken away his favorite thing, but you both twist around at the sound of giggling.

“Fuck.” Sans hisses and the intruder hurries back inside, tripping slightly on the ledge up. They’re saved by the balance of their long tail and they shut the door behind him.

“Who was that?” You’re embarrassed by how ragged and low your voice sound. You also notice you’re slightly higher than you were early. At some point Sans had pulled you onto his lap. This was not the outcome you expected.

Sans starts to stand up, so you slide off his lap. He still keeps an arm wrapped around your waist. “That was MK. This is not good.”

“Who’s MK?”

“Monster kid? The one about Frisk’s age?” Oh, the one from earlier. “Why is that a bad thing?” You ask.

“Someone probably sent them and Frisk to look for us sine we’ve been gone awhile. If it was Frisk that came out here we might have been alright…shit.” Sans shoves his hands in his pockets. You hear the fabric pull as he grunts in frustration. He pinches the area between in brow bones. “We’re going to have to do damage control.”

“I’ll talk to Aria.” You offer. “She tends to get…less angry with me. Relatively.”

“You sure about that?”

“You want to do it?” That shuts Sans up real quick. “Fine, you win.” He starts to walk around the long side of the house to get in another way. He turns on his heel, and his hand find the base of your skull you pull you in for another long kiss. He back up, face flushed with blue, gives you a wink and disappears.

You sit back down on the bench to cool off. What a damn idiot. Does he know how much more trouble he’ll get the both of you in if you walk looking like a beet? Plus you can’t get this stupid grin off your face, it’s starting to hurt.

After a few minutes gathering your bearings, you quietly try to get back into the house. You feel like you’ve successfully snuck in when you close the door with a soft click.

You see Aria before she sees you. She’s talking to Frisk and MK in the living room. Everything looks civil until MK starts talking but you’re too far out of earshot to know what they’re saying. MK looks over their shoulder toward to door, but instead sees you and squeals something to Frisk and Aria. Frisk clasps their hands over their mouth to stifle an outburst of laughter. Aria is not as jovial as the teens, teeth clenched together and warped into a smile. You wonder if you can break a tooth that way.

Aria looks up to where MK was gesturing toward. Without arms, you’re kind of impressed they can do that. That girl can stare daggers, that’s for sure. She takes deep breath while MK and Frisk continue to make noise. She says something to then, wagging her fingers. They nod and she shoos them away.

Alright, you’re an adult, right? You can talk to your friend, obviously. It’s super awkward and you know it was a terrible idea. This shouldn’t be that bad. Aria sighs, shakes her head and walks over. “Come on, let’s talk.”

Aria asks Alphys if we can borrow her study for a bit, to which she agrees but still seems concerned. It’s unsettling you that Aria’s being so calm.

The study was one of those old fashion types, with a large mahogany desk and deep wood paneling on the walls, the back wall sporting a bookcase. It would have been a beautiful place except every shelf is stocked with anime everything. Figures, DVDs, manga, you name it. Undyne and Alphys had it. The strangest thing was a full sized cut out of some anime character from a show you watched as a little kid. Who would have guessed either of them would be so into this stuff?

Aria gently lets the door close. You choose to sit in one of the plush side chairs, but Aria picks to sit directly on the desk cross-legged.

“Okay, listen.” She takes a second to think. “I can’t stop you or Sans from doing anything. I know that, especially because this is a duel effort. Yelling at him is one thing, but I’m not stupid.” She rolls her head back. “You guys were just supposed to get along. I think you guys went a little further than that.”

You laugh nervously.

“Chara, you have to know why this is a bad idea right?” You don’t say anything. You pick at a loose thread on the chair. “Do you remember that Sans originally thought you were the bad Chara parading around as a regular person?” Aria’s voice is stringent, but wracked with concern. “It’s because your souls are almost identical. What happens if you’re together and you switch but the bad Chara is able to pull off acting like you? The outcome would be awful, to say the least. Chara and Sans have tried to kill each other before.”

You hadn’t thought about that. Sans tends to make you…forget that things could get to that point. It was a scary thought. When you had switched back from the outburst in his lab, he couldn’t tell it was you then. The last thing you would want is to hurt anyone. Were you even physically capable of injuring Sans? And if you did attack him as the bad Chara, what would happen to you?

“Do you get it now?” Aria starts to shift like she’s getting off the table. You stop her. “That’s not everything, is it?” You know there’s something else. All the off-handed comments, all the innuendos you’ve heard over the past few months.

Aria shifts back to her position, running her hand through her hair. “It’s not everything.”

“After Toriel turned Sans down…it was really hard for him. We had only known each other for maybe six months. He didn’t know what to do with himself. So I started introducing him to other humans…you know the phrase the best way to get over someone is to get under someone?”

You nod.

“Sans maybe took it a little too far. It really wasn’t my problem, I couldn’t care less who he slept with. It seemed to make him feel better, so why not? But just in general, people started figuring out that monsters who were strong could do anything with their magic.” Aria’s settled into the desk, one arm propping up her head balanced on her knee. She gives you a quick glance.

“What does that mean?” You’ve heard rumors about that kind of thing. But you had never really given it any thought. There was just so many other things happening.

“It means anything you can imagine, Chara. Which means Sans didn’t need to try anymore. People just came to him. They made it easy.” You slide back into the chair, stomach in knots.

“That’s a lot of women.” You say curtly under your breath.

“Well mostly women.” Aria retorts. She chuckled when she catches the face your making. “If it’s easy, it’s easy. If it helps, he prefers women. It’s also not nearly as often as it used to be.” Aria kicks her legs off the desk and leans back on her arms.

You grunt. “That does not help. I’m not sure that means for me though.”

Aria sighs. “Honestly, me either. Sans has done things with friends of mine in the past, but it was totally a one-and-done thing. That’s why I’ve gotten to angry with him about shit like this. Like, come on.”

“That’s what’s weird with you.” She continues. “Normally when I tell Sans to back off, he usually does it, no questions. He usually doesn’t care. But he’s…different about this. About you, I guess.”

Your stomach is doing weird flip flops. Aria coughs to get your attention before you drift back to your own world. “But, that doesn’t mean he’s kicked every bad habit. I just don’t want you get your hopes up and get hurt. I’ve lost friends before over this. I don’t want you to stop being friends with him or me because of something stupid.”

“Oh.” That’s a lot of information to take in. You had kind of put together pieces over time, but you couldn’t imagine it was this much. It was sort of comforting to know that Aria was willing to tell you this because she didn’t want to lose you as a friend.

“I guess that makes me and Sans even for today. I’m not exactly to supposed to tell anyone this. And he is not supposed to pull this shit.” She flashes a toothy grin.

“Let’s get out of here. We’ve got other stuff to worry about.”

Isn’t that the truth? You’re going to have to figure some things out on your own.

Leaving the room, you wonder if you’ll have a sense of normalcy again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I HAD NO BUSINESS WRITING THIS.  
> But I did it anyways.
> 
> Aria just doesn't lose any friends, guys.


	15. Save

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many nice things! You guys are awesome!
> 
> Warning: things of graphic, violent nature.

“Earth to Chara! Anyone home?” Dena snaps her fingers maybe a foot from your face. You jolt out of your daze, rocking the stool at the breakfast bar. “What is the matter with you? You’ve been zoning out all day.”

“It’s true!” Caroline pips and she runs through the living room back to her room with a basket of laundry.

“What the hell happened at that party?” Dena turns and leaves over the counter, using it to crack her back. She starts to round into the kitchen, but you can see realization hit her in the face when you don’t say anything.

“Omigosh Chara! Did something happen?!” You cross your arms on the counter and slam your head into them. “No.”

“Liar! What happened?” Dena’s already in the seat next you, batting her eyes at you. Caroline’s rushed back into the living room as Mercedes pokes her head out from her room. Great, an audience. Your roommates were great, but nosy as hell.

“Was it something with Sans?” Mercedes cocks her head and yours shoots up from its resting place. If it came from anyone else, you would have thought they might have been making fun of you. “Papyrus texted me earlier and said he was acting all zoned out too.” Dena and Caroline make high pitched noises that probably only dogs and babies can hear.

“Since when do you text Papyrus?” Less than two weeks ago Mercedes couldn’t even be in the same room as a monster and now she was texting the most rambunctious monster there is?

“Yeah. He said he would to help me interact with monsters better. Something about a royal guard’s duty. Texting’s a good way to start.” She sits on the floor in the living room with a cautious smile on her face.

“Aww no fair, I want to text Papyrus too!” Caroline whines, reaching for Mercedes phone.

“Wait, you guys are distracted!” Dena pouts. “Was Mercedes right?” She practically squeals the words. Instead of answering, you can feel your face starting to turn red so you shove it back into your arms.

“Don’t bully Chara, Dena. Even if she is dating a skeleton and refuses to tell us.” Caroline giggles through her hands.

“We are not dating! We…uh…” You yelp, biting your mouth shut as soon as you say it. Damn, you fell for it.

Dena jumps out of the chair and walks around the counter so she’s in front of you and just waits there.

“All we did was make out. Happy?” You quietly grumble through your arms. Sounds even worse now that you say it out loud. As annoying and invasive as it was, you do feel a lot of less out of it and much more alert. Embarrassed, but alert.

You look up to Dena’s face twisting between starting to ask you something and then back to contemplation. “Dena, what is it? We didn’t hear!” Caroline asks from the floor. She doesn’t look up from her phone as she types something in. Mercedes phone is resting on her leg. She’s stealing Papyrus’ number.

“How…how do you even do that?” Dena finally asks, hands poised on her hips.

“I don’t know! I didn’t really think about the mechanics of it…what’s so funny?” Your cheeks burn, as Dena starts to laugh. “I’m sorry, I’m not laughing at you I promise. It’s just…you guys _hated_ each other at the beginning of the semester.” She speaks between wheezes, clutching her stomach. “Chara, come on, you cried the first week because you thought he was going to make Alphys fire you! And now you’re very minimally hooking up! It’s funny!”

You sat back in into the stool. Caroline was still whining to know the details of what Dena said, but Dena was still too busy thinking your situation was hilarious. And while you wouldn’t use that word, it was kind of funny. It was true, you did cry. But it was an angry cry! You thought would for sure be fired.

Now you could get fired for other reasons.

The rest of the afternoon was the four of your making fun of each other’s dating histories. Hindsight is always 20/20, you think. Also, Caroline dumped that guy she was bringing over like three days after you last saw him. Even Mercedes finally admitted he probably had an IQ of 6.

Throughout this exchange you got a text from Alphys. Because it was getting close to finals week, you didn’t even want to think about it, there would be no lab for the next week because both she and Sans had to advise their respective graduate students for their thesis presentations. You rarely saw the graduate students, but most of them were pretty nice to you.

Honestly, it was alright with you. You had a ton of school work to catch up on anyways. And it might be alright to have a little distance from you know who.

Which is how you and serial procrastinator Caroline ended up at the library until 2 am on a Thursday.

“I’m never going to catch up.” She holds the door open for you as you walk out. The library is smack in the middle of campus and every parking garage and shuttle stop was equidistant from it. Good in theory, bad in practice. It’s less than a 10 minute walk, but it was still a pain.

Caroline skips up to match your pace. “See? I tried to tell you guys, boys make you less productive. You never listen to me!”

“Or maybe I started working an actual job and my classes are harder this semester?” She sticks her tongue out at your response.

“Huh? You girls tired of hanging out with boys? You should hang out with men.” Drunk and slurring, three larger guys approach you and Caroline. She shrinks behind you as they loom over you. All of them are at least a foot taller than either of you, and wearing well known Greek jackets. And this fraternity does not have a practically good reputation.

“No thank you.” You try to sound civil but the distain is apparent in your voice. You reach behind you to find Caroline’s hand. You start to lead her away, but a huge hand envelops your shoulder. “Come on sweetheart, give us a chance.”

You yank out of his grip. “I said no thank you.”

You heard Caroline yelp as one of the other boys pulls her from your grasp. “She didn’t say anything, so she can hang with us.” Her grabs her around the waist, her feet almost not touching the floor. You can see tears starting to well in her eyes, pleading for you to help.

“Don’t touch her!” You scream, stomping as hard as you can on this guy’s foot. Extra damage was dealt, because your boot had little heels on them. You heard snapping and screaming, hoping you broke some bones underneath his crappy shoes. You flail for a second, until you catch Caroline’ wrist.

“Run! Run!” You shout to her, so she registers it. You both take off in a dead sprint. You can here at least two of them running behind you, screeching every obscenity they can and describing what they’ll do to the both of you if they catch you. Which may be soon since neither you nor Caroline can run for much longer.

You spot a grated AC unit near one of the building. It’s got a small opening and plenty of space for two little refugees. You steer Caroline to change directions, shouting for her to get ready to hit the ground. When you do, you let her slide in first. You try crawling in as fast as you can, but a hand grips around your ankle with such ferocity you thought they might rip it off your body.

“Leave Chara alone!” Caroline cries, and you don’t see what she has in her hand, but she draws blood from the offending arm. You scramble to the back with Caroline, partially obscured by an overgrown bush.  

“Fucking shit! We’re going kill you, you stupid bitches!” One of the guy throws his body against the caging, ratting the entire structure. They start trying to rip at it, and attempt break open the locks holding the structure shut.

Caroline is in a wave of tears and cries, as you fumble with your phone. Should you call the police? Would they even get here in time…you’re about to start dialing but there’s a pang in the back of your head. Sans. It’s maybe a long shot, but you’ve seen him move from one place to the other too quickly to even see! And Aria said he was a strong monster! You send him a text that says HELP NEAR LIBRARY. Between Caroline’s crying and the guys yelling there’s no way he’ll hear you if you try to call.

The sound of metal clashing bring you back to the current situation. They managed to crack through some of the rusted over areas of the cage. You realize you’re starting to cry right along with Caroline, both of you huddled up together. Is this how you’re going to die? Another college campus murder of two poor girls walking alone at night, bodies found mangled and violated in front of the psychology building?

 _Backpack_.

You realize you have your ears covered.

_Check your backpack._

That’s not definitely Caroline. She’s crying far too hard to be able to speak. You aren’t sure who that is, but if this mystery voice is going to help, who the hell cares.

Still huddled into Caroline, you manage to pull your bag around.

_Look in cushioned part._

That must mean where you would keep your laptop if you ever brought it with you, but the things is a relic and you can’t use it unplugged. You never even bother to open that part of your backpack anymore. You feel terry cloth brush your fingers as you pull the weighted object from the pocket. You quickly unwrap the towel from it.

It’s a knife. You’ve never even seen this knife before. It must be close to eight inches, blade looking freshly sharpened. Your hand grips over it like it’s the most natural thing. You have a similar sensation from when you were playing piano at Undyne’s and Alphys’.

Your body starts to move forward. “Chara?” Caroline says between sobs. “What are you doing? Where did you get that?” It’s a whisper among angry, cursing shouts. Another hand shoots through the opening you crawled through earlier. You’re just too far for it to reach you. You prop yourself up on your knees, knife held over your head.

“Chara?!” Caroline wails, but it’s too late. You’ve already jammed the blade of the knife straight into this guy’s arm. He screeches into the night sky as you pull the knife out without hesitation, a stream of fresh blood bubbling from the laceration you made. As soon it was there, the arm is gone leaving a trail of blood stained grass.

You start to crawl out from the opening. You don’t want to, feeling the push back of wanting to stay put. You can hear Caroline’s confused cries and you leave the relative safety of the AC cage.

“Fucking bitch! You stabbed him?! I’ll fucking wreck you!” Both guys are standing together, one of them holding their arm clutch to the chest.

“Be glad I did not take his entire arm off. But it shouldn’t be too much trouble killing either of you since you seem so eager for it.”  

That’s not your voice. Those aren’t your words. The pitch of the voice is a touch deeper than yours with an inflection you recognize, but you can’t peg who has it. This isn’t the same as last time. You’re not the one in control. You will this to end, but nothing happens.

The bigger of the two guys lunges at you like a rabid dog. You don’t even flinch as you easily dodge. At least they’re more agile that you are.

He never hits the floor though. Both guys are tangled up into themselves, enrobed in a shimmering blue glow. You don’t know what’s happening, but someone does.

“Sans.” You can feel yourself hiss the name. There’s a break somewhere in both souls, like they’ve gone weak. You don’t know what it is, but you push your will has hard as you can. You stumble for a second before falling to the ground, dropping the knife with a dull thud. Yep, you got your body back.

After a few second of adjusting to being back, you see Sans. He’s got one hand in the air, bathed in the same colored light. But that’s not what shocks you. It’s his eye. His right eye is completely dark, but his left is a swirling mass of electric blue magic, so much that it’s sweeping like smoke across his cheek bone up towards his skull.

“You idiots must seriously be looking for a bad time.” He smirks, releasing his magic and dropping them to the ground. You feel panic roar from inside, though it doesn’t belong to you. Your attackers run off in a pitch of pure terror.

A flash of light and Sans is directly in front of you, pulling you to your feet. His the lights in his eyes are back to normal. “Are you okay? If they did anything, I’ll go find them and…” You don’t have a chance to respond before your buried in a haphazard hug, you face smooshed into the fuzz of Sans’ hood.

“I’m fine! But…oh no! Caroline!” You push him away, despite the fact you would rather stay where you were, and start running towards the AC cage. She’s already halfway out of the opening on all fours. She’s got both hers and your bag slung over her back. She drops them next to the cage and runs toward you practically knocking you over with her hug.

“I can’t believe you did that! Sans, did you see that?! Chara tried to save us!” Caroline shouts, still locking you in a hug.

Sans is bent over, picking through the grass. He seems to have found what’s he’s looking for and then walks over. “No, but I have an idea.” He said, his smile looking forced.  

“Thanks for saving us.” You give Sans a half smile. His features soften considerably. “Yeah, thank you!” Caroline echoes, still a little shaky. “I didn’t know magic could do that! I was great!”

“As great as it is, you two shouldn’t be out here anymore. I’ll take you guys home, how’s that sound?”

“Huh? How?” Caroline leans over you.

“We took the shuttle and you got didn’t drive here.” You continue.

Sans take Caroline’s wrist, but practically scoops you up in his other arm, pressing you tight against him.

“Don’t worry about it. I know a shortcut.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...either you choose Sans saved Chara and Caroline or Sans saved some assholes from getting wailed on by bad Chara.  
> Up to you. 
> 
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


	16. Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry you guys, I had this all ready to go yesterday and my computer decided it was update time and when it finished I lost about 2000 words.  
> BUT now it's finished and I actually like the way it came out the second time around so I hope you like it!

In a flash of white you’re back in your living room, back slamming into the couch like someone had drop you from 10 feet up. Sans and Caroline are on the other side of the room, both looking dazed. He looks frantic when realizes you aren’t with them, but sighs when we sees you all jumbled on the couch.

“Don’t scare me _dropping in_ like that.”

Caroline’s knees buckle from under her and she hit the worn carpet. Sans lets her arm fall with her. “You alright, kid?” Sans asks her as you do a half somersault off the couch and promptly fall onto the floor.

“Chara?” He sounds worried.

“I’m fine.”

Caroline starts to squeal a string of consciousness that you cannot decipher because it’s most likely too high pitched for humans to understand. She manages to startle Sans in the process, as he takes a few wary steps back.

You opt to stay on the floor. You didn’t realize how exhausted you were but you do know how annoying Caroline is being. “Caroline, spaces between words! And it’s like 3 AM, you’re going to wake up the entire building.” 

“Oh, sorry.” Caroline stands up, mostly un-phased. Luckily, no other roommates are awoken by Caroline’s siren. It’s not like it’s the worst noise you’ve ever heard come out her anyways. “That was just the craziest thing ever. We teleported! And I’m so tired I can’t feel my hands anymore. I’m going to bed.” She promptly marches into her room, no questions asked.

Sans walks over so he’s standing near your head. “She okay? I didn’t think magic, well magic like that, could mentally hurt people.”

“She’s fine. She’s just really disoriented and really tired. She’ll freak out tomorrow morning, I’m sure.”

“What about you?”

You hadn’t really thought about how you were. You were more worried about getting out safe. But honestly you felt horrible. Your body ached, and you were attacked on campus. You actually stabbed someone. Nothing about anything was okay.

Also you had been completely and totally possessed by Chara. You’re in slight denial about it.

“I’m…alive, I guess. I just want to sleep.” Good noncommittal answer.

“Good enough.” Sans knees the coffee table so he has enough room. He squats down and slides his hand under your back and knees, which startles the hell of you.

“What?!” You can feel your face starting to flush, but you also do not want to be dropped.

“We’ve got somewhere to go before you can sleep. Hold on tight, got it? I’m gonna make sure I don’t lose you this time.” He prompts you to grab around his neck, which you do, but only because you know if you fall somewhere else you won’t be so lucky to land in another soft location.

You don’t want to make assumptions, but this sounds like something you haven’t fully consented to yet.

You’re blinded by white light and a rush of what seems to be wind. There’s a tearing sensation, like someone is trying you yank you away from Sans. When he hits the ground, the force is magnifies, sending the both of you flying in opposite directions. You hit the floor and roll of few times on a hard polished surface. It’ll leave a few bruises for sure, but you’re mostly alright. You realize you’re in the lab.

Looking up, you can see Sans was flung into a pile of empty boxes Alphys hadn’t been able to toss yet. Lucky him.

“What the fuck?” You hear Sans shout. You get up and jog over. “I’ve heard about being _swept off your feet_ , but this is some bullshit.”

“You’re telling me.” You offer your hand, helping in out from the mountain of cardboard. Once he’s up, get doesn’t let go of your hand. You’re face starts to burn, but an angry rumble pounds from the inside of your chest. You’re forced to drop his hand.

“So, why are we are the lab?” You causally ask, walking over towards the door to switch on the lights. You hear electricity hum throughout as the lights snap on.

“Why, did you think we were going somewhere else?” He smirks, walking towards the back of the first floor where the industrial sized coolers are.

“No.” You say a little too quickly. You hear his breathe out a laugh, and you’re just happy you’re walking behind him. He reaches into one of the coolers, you can tell he’s very deliberately blocking your view. He shoves something into his pocket and starts walking toward the very back area of the first floor.

You’re not particularly partial to this area of the lab. It will eventually be a two room mini-clinic, where Alphys plans to run the next steps of her research, the closed-controlled drug trials. But as it is right now, it’s mostly half-finished rooms with empty door frames and medical office furniture strewn about the area without a home. She says it will finished after winter break but as it is now it just gives you the creeps.

Sans grabs one of the patient tables and pushes it in the space in between the two door frames, so it makes a clunk as it hits the wall.

“Sit.”

You stay standing in the entry way. “Why?”

Sans reveals the object he’d taken from the cooler. It’s a capped syringe sparkling with silvery-gold liquid. “Didn’t come to the lab on Monday, did you?”

You sharply inhale. Oh god. Because Alphys had given you the week off you had completely forgotten that you needed you have the determination serum injected. That would explain why there was an internal dialog and how Chara had been so ready to take over. You sulk as you walk over and pull yourself onto the table.

“That’s what I thought.”  He chuckles, uncapping the syringe. “Alphys ever teach you how to do this?”

You shake your head. “We haven’t had the chance yet.” What were you going to do now? Wake up Alphys in such god awful hours of the night?

“That’s okay. I had Alphys show me how to do this. I’ve never done it on a real person though. You’re gonna have to be _patient_ with me.” He gives you a sly wink as he palpates your arm, searching for a vein. You cringe thinking about the bruise you received last time. But to be fair, Aria was kind of in a rush.

The first stick is a miss. Sans curses as pulls the needle out, but not before you recoil in pain. Something feels like it’s kicking you in the sternum from the inside. “Hey, you okay? You need me to stop?” You push your arm forward and shake your head.

Sans hits the mark the second go around. A familiar warm sensation pulsates throughout your arm accompanied by the characteristic saturation of the world. It fades after a few seconds, as you shuffle back so you can lean against the wall. Everything inside feels calm.

“Feeling better? Thanks for _sticking it_ out with me.” Sans caps the syringe and attempts to throw it from your location into a biohazard box. It hits the lip of the cardboard and rolls along the floor.

You laugh. “Not much for basketball, huh?”

“I could dunk on you, if I had to.” He says, sauntering over to where the syringe fell, placing it in the biohazard box.

“Speaking of getting dunked on,” He continues. “Want to tell me what this is?” Sans places the knife next you. It’s dirty with the blood of your attacker and the dirt from when you dropped it.

You suck in some air, your eyes darting from the knife to the lights in Sans’ eyes. They’re too hard to read. “That’s…a knife.”

“Wow. Good to know your powers of observation haven’t been lost.” He places both hands on either side of your legs on the table slightly hovering over you.

You quickly relent. “I don’t know how it got into my backpack. I didn’t put it there. I’ve never even seen that thing before tonight.” You sit back against the wall, rubbing your arms through your jacket.

Sans raps his finger on the table. “What else?”

“I guess I was just afraid. They told me where to find the knife. The other Chara…they seemed like they knew what to do. I didn’t know if you were going to make it in time. I just…” You twist the fabric in your fingers.

It’s subtle, but you think you see Sans scowl. “They talked to you? Chara…please tell me you didn’t _let them_ take over.”

Your lack of response, except to wring your hand together, set Sans off. A spark of magic cracks into the air and lights in his eyes are snuffed out. You pull your legs in as close you as the go, a jolt of terror slicing through you. “Chara, what the fuck is wrong with you? Do you have any idea what could happen if you weren’t able to bring yourself back?” His fingers dig into hard plastic cushioning. While you’ve never heard him yell, the voice he uses causes you to shudder and pull your arms around your head. “We could all be dead already. We’re here trying to keep another tragedy from happening are you’re just going to let Chara out because you’re scared? You’re being too weak!”

“I am not weak!” You shout through closed eyes. You’re worried that if you open them, you’ll start crying. “I was afraid, but I wasn’t going to just sit there and let me and Caroline get killed! Chara helped us! And I was able to get back! They’re still afraid of you, that’s how I got back and now I see why!”

Your words echo through the empty lab. You can hear Sans take some steps away from you. When you open your eyes so see Sans looking directly at you. The lights in his eyes are back, but they’re dim.

“Chara…I didn’t…” You slide to furthest side of table and hop off before Sans gets a chance to finish. “Where you going?”

“Home.” You walk back toward the front of the lab, practically stomping. You feel bad about what you said, and no, you aren’t actually afraid of Sans. But what the hell did he want you to do? Just sit there until you got killed?

“Chara, you can’t be serious. After tonight? Besides, we aren’t done talking.” His footsteps follow behind yours.

“Well, Sans, I think we’ve established that I must be an idiot already, so why not? And I don’t really to talk anymore.” You’re being a complete child about this. But it doesn’t matter. You’re so pissed you might try to make the hour walk home.

Sans pulls on the hood of your parka, stopping you. “I’m not going to let you leave.” You try to yank your hood back, but without any extra cushion, Sans’ grip is much stronger than yours. He sighs, but doesn’t let you go. You refuse to turn around to look at him.

“Listen, I’m sorry about what I said to you. I was just angry. You’re not weak. But, you can’t imagine what it’s like to live the same days over and over again, never knowing who’s going to die this time around. This is the most stable my life has ever been. I don’t want to risk losing anyone, especially if I can’t get them back. And I don’t want to lose you either.”

You turn around slowly. Sans has a half-smile as he drops your hood. The silence drags on for a few minutes. “I’m sorry too. I don’t want to walk home. But I’m still kind of mad at you.” Sans puts a boney hand over his face, as he tries to suppress a laugh.

“You’re something else, you know that?” Sans leans against one of the table tops. “You can be mad at me, as long as you’re not walking into traffic or drunk frat boys, I think I’ll live.”

You lift yourself up so your sitting on top of the table next to where Sans is leaning. “So what else do I need to know, because I’m probably going to fall asleep in the next five minutes.” Adrenaline and determination only last so long after you’ve been awake approaching 24 hours.

“Well I think you’re being possessed more than we think, for starters.” You lose your balance for a second, but Sans grabs your knee to keep you from going anywhere. “It makes sense, the time of night when you’d normally be sleeping or when your soul is…afraid. It’s times when they may be able to get you. And that when they were afraid you were able to come back yourself.”

“Second point is that they’re somehow getting stronger. That one’s still over my head, but we have to do something soon.” Sans grips your knee. You can feel his frustration bleed through.

You’re worried. Neither of those things is good. But you’re so damn tired. Any energy you had earlier you used up being mad. “You’re taking this better than expected.” Sans shakes your leg a little bit, but you just sort of wobble your head. “No, I am kind of freak out, I just don’t…too tired.”

Sans reaches up and picks your body up off the table, so he’s holding on you’re the same way as earlier cradled in his arms. “Let’s get you home then. We’ll figure it out later. Let’s just hope for a smooth landing this time.”

With a flash of light and rush of wind, you feel solid ground. No one is thrown anywhere much to the collective relief of everyone involved. After a second, you realize this isn’t your living room. It’s your bedroom. You look at Sans with wide eyes, unsure of what kind of reaction you should portray.

“I know your roommates are heavy sleepers, but it probably wouldn’t be the best if I showed up with you like this.” He bounces you lightly in his arms to prove his point.

“Oh yeah. They’re super nosy. They’d bug me about this for weeks.” You say it like nothing’s ever happened but you’re already unconsciously nuzzling into Sans’ chest. He chuckles softly as he places you in your bed.

“It’s late as hell. I’m gonna get out of your hair. Call me if you need anything.”

You don’t even notice that you’ve done it, but your hand clamps around the bottoms of Sans’ jacket. He looks down at it and then back to you. You can see blue starting to creep across his face. You’re sure yours is already an unholy shade of red.

“You need something now?”

Your mind wages internal war in the few seconds that pass by. Stay. No, don’t. Stay. Stay. Leave. Stay. No, bad idea. Yes, good idea. Bad idea, good idea. Stay. Go. Stay. Go.

You release the jacket. It falls back against Sans with a quiet flop. “Sorry…I’m just really tired.” You pull your hand back to rub your eyes to prove you’re telling the telling the truth. Even though it’s only a partial truth.

Because your palms are blocking your eyes, you don’t see Sans behind down to meet your height. You feel him gently press his mouth against yours. It’s a long, drawn out kiss and you make a small noise when he finally pulls away. He gives you a soft smile that you can’t read.

“I’ll see you later Chara.” And with that, he’s gone.

When you finally process what just happened, you slam your face into you bed, yanking your comforter clear over your head.

You really are an idiot.


	17. Toriel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not a big holiday themed writer, but have a chapter for xmas, yay!

_“Holy crap! Chara, are you and Caroline sure you’re okay?”_

“Yeah we’re fine. Sans was able to help us out. Did you know his magic can lift people?”

_“Yes, I know that. Did you guys fill out a report? It’s really serious.”_

As much as you wanted to be as concerned about the situation as Aria was, you were mildly distracted from the phone. You were at your desk in your room clicking away on your old-ass laptop for an online assignment. Why do you even have online work when your class isn’t online? You had woken up around noon, remembering your assignment was due at 5 PM. You hate how crazy stuff gets right before finals week.

“Yeah,” You mumble into the receiver. “Caroline did it this morning, she already sent it in.”

_“And everything’s okay?”_

“It’s okay for now. I didn’t go into the lab on Monday, so I didn’t have any determination serum, I forgot. I had to go to the lab with Sans. I may have switched into the other Chara…” You sigh as you trail off, not because you were upset by it. You were more concerned that you weren’t upset by it.

_“…You were alone with Sans in Alphys’ lab?”_

“Really? That’s what you’re worried about?”

_“Won’t lie to you, I’m not sure who’s more dangerous between the other Chara and Sans. But I’m not going to talk about that because it’s super weird and still a bad idea. But I do have good news.”_

“Enlighten me.” You know it’s a bad idea, Aria really didn’t need to remind you all the time.

But you kept doing things with Sans so maybe you did.

_“Don’t get sassy. I asked Frisk if they thought they had anything that might have belonged to Chara, and they said they do! I’m going to get it from their house later today, wanna come?”_

“Well yeah I want to go. Why is it important to have though?”

_“It’s how we’re going to convince Alphys to try and help us out, duh. We still have to tell her. Oh wait I have an idea!”_

This did not sound like an idea you were going to like. _“You should tell Sans we should talk to Alphys about all of this.”_

“Aria…”

_“Hey, I know he’s been using you to talk to me! He’s not as slick as he thinks he is.”_

You grunt into the phone. You hang around too many people who are too smart. “Fine. But you can’t say anything about anything that happens later, okay?”

_“Deal. I’ll pick you up in a few hours. Are you going to be around during the break? I don’t get off until like 2 days before Christmas. That’s medical school for you.”_

“Yeah, my parents are going to my older brother’s house until the week of Christmas. So I’m sticking around to catch up on all the work I’ve missed at the lab.”

_“Cool. I have to go, have to study. As always.”_

“Talk to later.”

You rapped your fingers on your keyboard. How did anyone expect you to finish any work this way?

You managed to finish your assignment thirty minutes before Aria texted you when she would be there. It’s a good break from the work you had to speed through. You were starting to get annoying with this entire situation, mostly because it was starting to affect your actual schoolwork. And that was not going to fly.

Aria texts you to come down to where she’s waiting in the parking lot. “We’re not taking your car, are we?” You ask as you hop down from the last stair, but she snorts in response. “What else would we take? Sans’ motorcycle?” She glances down at you like it’s supposed to be funny, but she immediately holds her hand up when you shrug in response. “Scratch that. I don’t think I want to know the answer.”

One thing Aria and Sans most definitely have in common is they both drive way too fast. And Aria’s car is much older than Sans’ motorcycle so would it even hold up at higher speeds? There’s no way to know.  You press yourself into the seat, refusing to look out the window. “Can we go a little slower?” You whimper.

“Oh. Sorry. Just trying to make good time.”

You stay pressed against the seat. “Hey Aria?” She makes a noise so that you know she heard you. “Has your other soul…ever spoken to you?”

She drums her fingers on the steering wheel. “Hmm. Only once really. It was before we…oh what should I call it? I guess before our souls merged. They told me they needed a home and I needed something to help fill the cracks in my soul. Oh and they also had something they needed to do. But after that, no. It’s just feelings we share. It’s hard to explain.”

You rub and hand over your sternum. “How can a soul be cracked?” You remember that your soul is a deep shade of black, but you know it’s solid. You wonder if it’s actually black or just…infected.

Aria lets out a strained laugh. “I had a lot of issues during high school. There was a lot of violence I perpetuated towards others and myself because I was so depressed, like I could never help anyone or myself. It’s kind of funny to think about now, when I actually met Sans again. We were both such fucking messes. No one would guess it now!”

“Oh. I for sure wouldn’t have guessed that. You never seem like you’re…” You trial off.

“Yep. It was not a good deal. Always been one for justice, but justice without the words to say it means nothing. And my way of doing it back then was not the right way to do it. Apparently all I needed was a little bravery to figure things out. And of course I’m never really alone anymore. That helps.” She laughs.

Maybe that was a plus. While it wasn’t a comforting type of presence you knew you weren’t ever really alone.

Now you were too curious to not ask. Usually, Aria shuts you down when you ask about this stuff, but since she’s already on a roll you might as well take a chance. “What about Sans?”

She takes a deep breath, sounding a little sad. “It took longer for him, I think. There was the whole reset thing…but Sans had a lot of demons to fight after coming out of the underground, besides from constantly thinking he was back in Snowdin town. He had a lot of nightmares, outbursts, stuff like that. Toriel turning him down didn’t help either.” Aria pulls onto the backroad. You know you’re close to the house.

“Papyrus didn’t really know how to deal with it, and I did my best to try and help but I was a still a mess myself. I mean there were so many times where we would sit outside of his room for hours trying to get him to come out. I would say in the last two years we he really pulled it together.”

Aria’s car clunks into the driveway. “We’re here. You got enough out of me for one day, huh?”

You give her a half-smile. Yep, you hang out with people who are way too smart.

Frisk is waiting on the front step of the grand home. They wave when you and Aria get out of the car and run to you before you get to the front door. “Hi Aria! Hi Chara! I know I told I had something that belongs to Chara…but I can’t find it.”

Aria grabs Frisk, giving them a solid noogie before they finally escape in a fit of laugher. “Oh, children.” Toriel stands in the doorway, light pouring out from her home. “It is almost dark, please come inside.” The three of your traverse to the front door.

Aria gives Toriel a half hug before following Frisk up the stairs. “We have to find something, Toriel. We’ll try to find it quick. Can you stay with Chara for a little bit?”

“Of course Aria. Frisk, try to not make a mess of your room. I do not want to see it in such disarray anymore.”

Sheepishly, Frisk nods but it turns into a cheesy grin. They continue up the stairs, Aria in tow.

“Come Chara. I will make you some tea.”

Toriel’s living room is very…floral. And you’re embarrassed that your feet don’t touch the ground from the plush sofa. It makes you feel very small and very child-like. Toriel does evoke a strong sense of motherliness though.

You can hear soft noises from the kitchen and all of sudden you’re feeling somewhat uncomfortable. Not because of Toriel, directly. But partially because there’s no way you could be Toriel. You wonder if Sans could actually like you, even though you’re really the opposite of her. She’s wonderful and graceful, while you’re kind of a dork and you constantly get embarrassed about everything. And also Toriel was Chara’s adoptive mother. That was weird. How old did that make Toriel? How old did that make Sans?!

When Toriel comes back in with a tray stocked with lovely yellow patterned china, you can’t help but flinch. “Did I startle you, young one? My apologies.” She places the try on the coffee table, taking a seat next to you. She hands you a small saucer with a tea cup. Golden colored tea. You actually found that you liked it a lot.

Toriel takes a long sip of her own tea, studying you as she does so. “So it seems as though Sans is rather fond of you. Or so I’m told.”

The statement takes you completely off guard, causing you to breathe in a pool of tea. Throughout your choking fit, Toriel firmly pats your back to help expel the liquid. “I’m sorry! I did not mean to startle you yet again.” Her pats turn into soft rubs as your coughing dies down. You catch sight of yourself in a glass cabinet. Your face is blood red, but it’s probably due to a mix of mortification and lack of oxygen. You hope Toriel just assumes it’s from the choking.

“As sorry as I am for giving you such a fright,” Toriel places her cup directly in front of her. “I am glad that Sans is putting together the last pieces of his life on the surface.” You give Toriel an incredulous look, which makes her giggle softly.

“And if I am not mistaken, you are also fond of him?” Alright, now she for sure knows your face is red because you’re blushing. Frisk was so right, she can read souls like nobody’s business. You can tell she’s mentally patting herself on the back for being right.

“Maybe…” You finally answer. “I don’t really know if it’s anything. Besides, I don’t really think I’m the kind of person he would really like.” You bite down on your bottom lip. Toriel clearly understand what you mean.

“My child, it is because you are not like me that it could be something. I am sure Frisk has informed you based on your pervious statement. Such a mischievous child.” She glaces towards the stairs, shaking her head. “But Sans and I were not destined to be. Everything about such a relationship would have been wrong. The monsters and humans needed to see a strong king and queen to be politically successful. While there was not reconciliation with my ex-husband, having another relationship would have been viewed poorly. And Sans was in no place to take care of himself, let alone anyone else at the time. I would have needed someone who could give Frisk a good life. They had already worked too hard in the underground and deserved to be a child.”

Good thing you had managed to get Aria talking or you would be so confused right now. But you did feel a pang in the back of your head. All of those reasons where very adult, but not because they didn’t care for each other. It made you nervous.

“The timing would have made it an impossibility. Would you like to know something that shows just how ridiculous?” Toriel’s mouth turns upward, a soft paw slightly covering it. You perk up a little bit a nod.

“In the early stages of monsters coming to the surface, there was a group of people who attempted to hurt Papyrus. Aria, Sans and Undyne defended him, and let us just say it ended quiet poorly for those humans. It was very brave, but so very irresponsible. It was quite a scene to watch Aria and Frisk try to explain what happened to police. Could you imagine an eighteen year old and a nine year old doing such a thing?” You laugh at the idea along with Toriel. While you didn’t know what Aria looked like in her first year of college, you could only imagine little her and little Frisk trying to make nice after a bunch of monsters jumped a pack of racists. Those were pretty bad times for monster though.

“Do you understand? We were at very different places in our lives. And even though things have changed, feelings do fade when left alone.”

“Yes. I’m still not sure about the whole idea of it.” You admit.

Toriel is about to say something else to you, when Aria and Frisk burst down the stairs. “Finally found the damn thing!” Aria rasises something into the air but almost drops it when Frisk crashes into her.

“Language please.” Toriel huffs. Aria mutters an apology as Frisk takes the object from her.

“Chara, this is it!” They drop it in your hand. It’s a shimmery gold necklace with a heart shaped locket attached to the long chain. You give it a tug, but the chamber is smashed shut. The longer you hold it, the shakier your hands get. Your fingers continually try to encase it, but you have to fight the urge. You can feel pounding in your head and your chest. It gets harder and louder by the second.

Aria pulled the locket from your hands. “Everything okay?” You give a quick nod and your pulse quickly drops back to normal. What the hell was that thing?

“Frisk, why do you have that?” Toriel asks. Worry and concern drip from her voice.

“It was with a bunch of stuff that was brought up from the underground. I wanted to see if Alphys could get it open.” Damn Frisk, you think. Quick thinking little devil. Toriel still looks wary but she nods her head regardless.

“We’d love to stay Toriel, but Chara’s got finals next week. We’ll take this the lab and have it back ASAP.” She flashes a winning grin. Aria nudges you until you stand up and start walking towards the front door.

“It was good to see you both again. Please do not be strangers.” Toriel winks impishly, which makes a slight flush to cross your face.  

“Yeah come hang out again!” Frisk and Toriel wave to you as you get back into the death machine, aka Aria’s car.

As soon as she hits the main road, you realize.

Tone of the voice, the inflection, the proper articulation.

Chara sounds like Toriel.

This is so complicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will more Sans stuff in the next chapter, no worries peeps.


	18. Sensitize

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Another one! 
> 
> I also managed to finally use my favorite joke EVER.  
> It's so nerdy but ITS THE BEST.
> 
> And yet I continue to be creative trash.

As much as you wanted to ponder all the things changing your life, you had finals to focus on.

Four exams out of the way, no problems so far. Last one was in two days, genetics. It was never your favorite subject and now you were even less fond of it. Seeing as yours had royally fucked you over.

You wander out of your room after a few hours. Mercedes is already there, making a pot of coffee. “Hey Chara. Oh, you look exhausted.”

“Yeah. I had a bunch of exams this morning. I haven’t been sleeping too much.” You slump over on the counter.

Mercedes pushes over a mug, with light swirling liquid. “I know you don’t really like coffee, but it could help. I put milk in it.”

The mug is warm against the coldness of your skin. “Thanks Mercedes. Guess I’ve been a bit of a mess lately.” You drum your finger on the ceramic. You try take a sip, but the bitterness makes your cringe. And considering you still get that weird bitter taste in your mouth from time to time, more bitterness wasn’t exactly welcome.

Mercedes laughs when she sees your expression. “Still not a fan huh?”

You take another big gulp, but it does no good in making it more tolerable. “I don’t know how your guys drink this stuff. Thanks anyways Mercedes, but I think I’ll try to stay awake on determination alone.”

It was a nice thought to try and use will power to get through the rest of your studying, but you wake up with a start, face buried in your textbook. How long had you been asleep? Genetics isn’t your favorite subject, but it’s never put you to sleep. You must be more tired that you thought. It’s a little embarrassing. Your laptop screen blares with a with search engine. Why is it on? You don’t even use your computer when you study.

You’re about to shut if off when it strikes you to see what the last thing you searched was.

_Mt. Ebott._

_How to get to Mt. Ebott._

_Getting inside Mt. Ebott._

And several variations of all of those.

You grab your phone and take a picture before you do anything else. Your hands shake as you try to hit the touch screen. You immediately send it to Sans with the description;

“This wasn’t me. What does this mean?”

Sans calls you about two minutes later.

_“Hey, are you at your apartment?”_

“Yes.”

_“Stay there, I’ll be there in 15 minutes.”_

You shift around uncomfortably in your room. Why did he sound so worried? You know that this couldn’t be good, but it was still just a computer search. If he ever explained anything to you himself it might not be so annoying. It might not even mean anything. And now you have to deal with being around Sans while you’re gross and exhausted. Awesome.

You wander outside. The sun already threatens to set, but being outside makes you feel a little better. Your steps echo in the stairwell and you choose the bottom stair to wait.

Sans gets to your apartment complex earlier than he said he would. You know because you hear the familiar roar from his motorcycle. He pulls it into the closest parking spot and practically jumps off it. He rounds another car and stops when he sees you sitting on the step.

“How come you didn’t do the teleport thing since you seem so freaked out?” You lean your head into arms. A group of students who you know live another building walking across the way stop, chattering and pointing at Sans. You think they’re being stupid since your school has a pretty significant monster population. Is a skeleton that odd? Sans turns in their direction and waves, causing them to shriek and run off.

“It’s not teleporting, it’s a shortcut. And I try not to use magic unless it’s an emergency.” He nudges you to stand up, but you don’t move. “It’s getting cold out here. Plus we need to figure out what those searches were all about.”

You poke your head inside your apartment but there’s no way around it. Dena and Mercedes are in the living room. “What’s the hold up?” Sans starts to push the door open. You managed to avoid a crisis last week, but so much for that.

You don’t make eye contact with either of them as your stomp through the living room. Sans takes his time, saying hi to both roommates and mentioning to Mercedes that Papyrus says she needs ‘monster practice’. You wait near your door until Sans finally makes his way into your room.

Before you walk in yourself, you hiss low enough to both of them so you know Sans can’t hear. “It’s nothing, don’t say anything!” Mercedes cocks her head with a strained smile, but Dena gives you a full thumbs up while trying to control her laughter. Dammit.

Sans is already at your computer, looking through the searches. It makes your stomach jump even though you know you haven’t looked up anything questionable in a while. Still.

“Alright, they got me. I have no idea why they want to go back to Mt. Ebott. But safe to say you won’t be doing any hiking any time soon.”

“Fine with me. I’m not much for hiking anyways.” You shut off the monitor lest Sans wants to keep digging around your personal files. “But I had Alphys give me a shot on Monday. Why are these things happening? Does that mean it’s not working?”

You drop down on your bed. Blue swims though the sea of your green blankets. You fumble with your blankets nonchalantly to cover it. Sans must know you never returned his jacket, but that fact your sit around wearing it every once in a while is on a need to know basis. And he did not need to know.

 

“We need to talk to Alphys. I think I’m…we’re becoming sensitized to determination serum.” You dig a hand into your hair. “I don’t think it’s working anymore. I fell sleep for two hours and...Alphys might be able to help.”

Sans sits down next to you. “I don’t really want to do that. Was this Aria’s idea?”

“Does it matter? She’s not wrong.” You rock forward so that your feet touch the floor. “I just don’t know how much longer I can do this. It’s already starting to affect my school work and I can’t afford more outbursts. It’s going to start affecting other things. I feel like I have a disease or something.”

“It’s a little like a disease. But seeing you like this just makes me _sick_.”

“That’s not funny.” You shove him a little, but he doesn’t even budge. You bundle yourself into a ball on your bed.

“I’m always funny.” A smile stretches across Sans’ face. “But what do you want to do about this now? Even if we told Alphys right this second we can’t do anything immediately.”

You pull at the ends of your hair. You’ve been doing it so often you’re worried if you’ll eventually pull all your hair out. “Going to sleep…it’s a little…”

The lights in Sans eyes flicker. “Chara? Do you not want to be alone?”

Maybe if you pretend he didn’t actually say it out loud it would be like he didn’t actually say it.

“I can stay if you want me too. I’ll need a yes or no at some point.” Sans stands back up, and casually strolls around your room. Is he trying to mess with you?

You stay in a huddled ball, fairly sure you’re hot enough to keep the entire apartment heated for days.

Standing in front of you Sans shrugs, but he’s looking elsewhere. “Guess that’s a no?”

How often does anyone get a second chance on the surface? Probably not too often. Your hand reaches out, pulling the hem of Sans’ jacket. He’s about to say something, but you yank the jacket hard enough that he’s forced to take a step forward.

“Oh.” His face spreads into a wide grin. “Got it. Let me call Paps.”

Sans leaves your room, cell phone already pressed to his head. Jerk doesn’t even have ears, you grunt to yourself. What the hell are you doing, you didn’t actually do that did you? So what if you’re worried about the other Chara, is that really important? Sans is going to stay here? Really? Why didn’t you just punch yourself in the face, would have been less stressful overall. 

Sans walks back into your room, phone still pressed to his face and slowly closes the door. “You’ll be fine Pap? Yeah I know you’re no baby bones. Just don’t get to _bonely_ without me.” You can hear Papyrus wail over the phone.

“You’e gotta love Papyrus…Chara. Are you okay?” You managed to partially tangle yourself in your blankets during your mini freak out. You try to release yourself from your entrapment, but you slide off the bed in the least climatic way ever landing on the floor with a plop. Sans shakes his head while laughing, but then gives you a strange look.

“Is that my jacket?”

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Is it possible to actually melt into the floor and die? Because that would be lovely right now. You throw your arms over the face, but can still see Sans picking up the jacket checking to see. He nods at it and tosses it at you.

“Good to know it’s getting some use. I never wear it anymore.” You sit up, peeking over the plush fabric. He’s still standing in front of the bed, like he’s waiting for another reaction. “Plus it look way better on you than it does on me. Keep it.”

You sit there in your pile of blankets and hoodie, not really knowing what to do with yourself. Sans keeps an eye on your and he flips through your genetics textbook. You just watch him in a haze, wondering exactly how you got to this point in your life. “I have that final on Friday.” Your voice is just as hazy as your mind is.

Sans picks up the book and snaps it shut. “Want any help?”

Is he serious?

Shit, he was so serious.

You’d never had such an intense study session. Sans drilled out on equations and theories and hell if you didn’t know Hardy-Weinberg equilibrium and all of its little nuisances in and out at this point. And while you’re about to burn out hard-core he looked like he barely even broke a sweat.

“Is it that late already?” Sans drops your book and notes in a heap on your desk, some of the papers getting crushed in the process. You pout, knowing your notes are basically ruined.

“I thought you were supposed to be lazy.” You yawn pulling Sans’, well your, jacket tighter around you. You’re wearing it now. It’s sad but you can’t help it.

Sans drag himself onto your bed to the corner furthest away from you. “I am lazy. That was kid’s stuff, it was easy.” He slouches into the wall, putting both hands behind his head. You cuss at him and throw a pillow at him, but he just lets it hit him in the face and leaves it there. Probably trying to prove his point.

“Want to hear a biology joke?” He said, slightly muffled by the pillow.  

“No.”

“If I was an enzyme, do know which one I’d be?”

“Sans, no.”

“DNA helicase, so I could unzip your _genes_.”

“SANS!” You throw your only other pillow at him, but the desired effect is not reached as it just causes the other pillow to fall off of him.

“Chill Chara, I was only kidding.” He laughs, either at his own joke or at how red your face is. “Well, only half kidding.” He mutters just loud enough for you to hear.

Awkward silence drifts in the air. Sans stays where he is with closed eyes, but with a splatter of blue across his cheekbones. Maybe it would be in both of your best interests if you just went to sleep, except you’re completely pillow-less.

You try to crawl over without disturbing Sans, but his eyes shoot open just as your about to grab one of them.

“What are you doing?” His voice is surprised but low.

The word almost gets stuck in your throat. “P-pillow.” He presses his teeth together as he closes his eyes again. You pull one toward you but can’t get your legs to work well enough. You’re not exactly sure what you’re waiting for. Eventually you figure you’re just starting so you sit back on your feet.

“I’m not going to do anything. I keep making things worse or getting in trouble whenever…who am I kidding, it’s not helping you or me by doing this. I was just going to stay here and make sure you’re alright. It’s the easiest thing to for my time.”

“That’s…” You should really be agreeing but you just feel kind of shitty. You guess Sans really is that lazy. You guess you’re just too much work.

“Unless you started something.” Sans leans his head over, but you’re just sitting there looking completely bewildered, mouth slightly agape. “But I’m not particularly worried about that. You’re an even worse pacifist than Frisk.”

Oh. He was trying to challenge you. Question was, do you go directly into his trap or just go to sleep like a responsible adult who has self-control?

Eh, can you really be considered a responsible adult? Apparently not.

You half drop, half throw the pillow down next to you and crawl over Sans. His jolts a little bit when he sees you’re practically on him, but you steady yourself on his knee, which is jarring because whoa, patellas move around whether your human or monster. You throw your leg over so you’re neatly straddling his hips and press your hands to his chest. And whoa, spaces between ribs, that’s new.

And then you…didn’t think about what’s supposed to happen next. You do know in general, but not specifically with a skeleton. Not exactly the same as human guys. You drop your head into his shoulder. “I didn’t think this through. I don’t know why I did this.” You admit.

“I don’t know either, but I’m not complaining.” He flicks his shoulder so you pick your head back up. “Want any help?” Sans takes your chin between his fingers leading you close until you’re kissing. Each time your mouths meet, the kisses get deeper and more intense. You start to link you hand through Sans’ ribs, but he grimaces. “Not there, hurts near the sternum.”

“Sorry.” You mumble against his mouth, doing your best not to pull away. You slide your hands further around.

Sans mimics your motions, except against your bare skin since he apparently found his way under your shirt, which send chills up your spine. “Don’t worry about it.” Sans shifts his hips against you, and you groan because of it. Sans pulls you so you’re basically on top of him, as he slouches down lower. You’re so doomed.

Something warm slides into your mouth, with the texture of glass but still able to move fluidly. Wait. What? A hand flies over your mouth and you yank away from him. Sans’ left eye calmly blazes with electric blue magic along with something sticking out of his mouth in the same color. It’s a tongue.

Sans lets out a strained laugh. “Should have warned you huh?”

You stare at him for a second, trying to process what’s actually happening. ‘Magic can do whatever you want it to.’ Now you know it’s true. Your face burns, but it doesn’t stop you from kissing Sans again.

“Yeah, you should have warned it. It’s super weird.” Sans slides you back for a second, giving you a contemplative look. “But my entire life is insane so it’s nothing I’m not used to.” You pull Sans’ face back towards you, taking everything in because what else are you going to do? Stop?

Right on cue, you should have seen it coming. You would be stopping. Your chest start pounding, but not in a good way. It wrenches and tears behind your chest wall, making you double over.

“Chara? Hey, Chara? Are you okay?” Sans sits up as you sort of roll off of him, but buckle down into the bed as the pain waxes and wanes. After a few moments, the pain relents and you sit up. “Yeah I’m okay.” Sans shakes his head, confusion and concern in his back to normal eyes.

“Really, I’m alright now. I think _someone_ didn’t like what was happening so they made sure I had to stop. I don’t think they can do any worse than this right now.”

Sans slumps back against wall. “You gotta be kidding me. This thing is making my life too hard.”

You cautiously scoot next to Sans, so you’re mostly snuggled against him. “Gosh Sans, I’m so sorry this is ruining your life. It must be so hard for you.” Sarcasm drips from every word.

He runs a hand through your hair and lets out an exhausted chuckle. “Yeah, yeah. I don’t need shit from the both of you.”

It takes a while, but eventually the both of you fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. RIBS HURT LIKE A BITCH IF YOU HOLD THEM TOO CLOSE TO YOUR STERNUM PEOPLE BETTER LEARN. Trust me on this guys.  
> 2\. Uhhhh so I've never written anything close to even slightly explicit (I do not think this crosses the line but it's getting close ohmygod) but yeah  
> I don't know what I'm gonna do about that.


	19. Remember

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys really liked that last chapter.  
> And I'm over here still in shock that I wrote that. Seriously. 
> 
> I needed something cutesy for this chapter.  
> Instead I wrote something angsty. Ugh.

_“Chara! Stop! That’s not fair! You never let me go first!”_

Who is that? You feel like you know them well, but they sound so far away.

This voice must be a friend. They sound like a friend. You’re running through somewhere dark, illuminated by soft, silvery violets and blues. What game are you playing? How can you forget its name when you know it so well? Are you winning? Of course, you always win. Except when you let your friend win. Only on special occasions. You continue to hold the lead as they tail behind, calling your name.

You’re somewhere new. A table in a cozy living room which you’re too small for. That’s alright, you just let your feet kick back and forth. Your friend is there with you, also too small for this big space. A sweet smell wafts from the kitchen. You feel so at home.

_“Chara! Mom made your favorite!”_

You tell them it’s their favorite too.

But now you can’t eat it. Your breathing is shallow. Someone is crying, trying to apologize. It’s your friend but they’re blaming themselves for you condition. You try to sit up and tell them it’s the way it has to be and everything will work out for the best, but the pain is too much. Your muscles are deteriorating, your heart rate is slowing, your body is shutting down. No one knows how to help you. You’re dying.  But this is what you want. This will make everything right.  

You’re dying again. Your chance to make every right has gone horribly wrong. To take your own life was one thing, but now your choice takes another. It’s your friend. You just wanted to do what you thought was right, but they felt differently. Your friend didn’t know how you truly felt. You didn’t know how they truly felt. Blood mixed with tears falls into a bed of golden flowers. Together you die, a death pained with the scars you bear together.

And yet they still call your name. How can anyone be so kind so someone who’s done such wrong?

“Chara! Chara, wake up!”

Your eyes snap open, only to see darkness. Air catches in your lungs as you scramble around in your confusion before someone catches your shoulders.

“Hey, hey. You’re okay. It’s okay, calm down.”

“Sans?”

Oh right. Sans stayed over at your apartment. In your room. With you. Alone.

And you’re pressed against him, blankets wrapped around the both of you. Right.  

“Yeah.” He breathes when you stop trashing. “I think you had a nightmare. You were shouting and crying in your sleep.” He pushes back your hair, which is slightly damp. You realize your sweating despite the cold.

“I’m pretty well versed with nightmares.” He continues with a sight chuckle. “Want to talk about it?” Sans massages the back of your neck since you’re still a little riled up.

You bring your finger to touch your face. It’s tender and drenched with tears. “Was it? It didn’t feel like a nightmare.” Your body reacted like it was a nightmare, but your mind isn’t running at full speed, the way you would expect it too.

“Well, what was it then?”

You try to relive the dream. Your recollection of it is starting to fade, but you feel like you can’t call it a dream. Parts of it where blacked out, but there was a faint sense of familiarity. “A memory.”

There’s a long stretch of silence before anyone says anything again. “Yours?” Sans lazily drags his fingers through your hair. Normally, you really dislike it when anyone messes with your hair but you can deal with it for now.

“I don’t think so.” You shift around until you’re comfortable again. “They were broken memories, and I couldn’t see anyone. But it started off really content and slowly became worse and worse. It was awful. Do you think it’s a bad thing? Do you think Chara showed me them on purpose?”

“While I can’t say if it’s good or bad, I doubt they let you see those memories on purpose. Things like that…they’re too personal.” Sans takes a deep breathe. “Makes you vulnerable.” His voice is tired, you’re losing him to sleep. Which is fair enough considering you’re starting to drift off also. It was a quick rush of adrenaline, but the moment is long over.

“No more nightmare memories for tonight?” He yawns, pulling you into his side.

“No promises.”

You prove Sans right. You made it through the night without incident.

You had no finals today, that’s tomorrow’s issue. But did have another nightmare to deal with.

Sans was already letting himself out of your room before you had a chance to stop him. Knowing your luck, you would certainly have an audience in the living room. You yank a different hoodie over your head, as you pull a brush through your hair. You’re already multitasking, you won’t be able to stop him. Dammit.

And there they were. “Hi Sans!” Dena and Caroline chirp together in a singsong voice. Mercedes tried to accompany them but it came out garbled and high pitched as she ducks behind the counter. They fucking practiced.

“Hey.” Sans shakes his head with a chuckle. You, on the other hand, stand next to him somewhere between fuming and embarrassed enough to jump out a window.

“Thanks for the warm welcome. Good to see you again.” Sans saunters inbetween Dena and Caroline to lean over the breakfast bar. “Hey, is the one behind the counter Mercedes?” Sans leans over the counter, as Mercedes furiously nods her head, almost in tears. “Geez, kid. I don’t bite. But Pap says if you’ve got time this weekend he wants Undyne to help you with your issue. Don’t know if that’s gonna help, but good luck.”

Yeesh, Papyrus was enlisting Undyne? Maybe you should go with her. You’ll ask later. Sans walks towards the front door giving a quick goodbye to the rest, waggling his finger for you to follow. You march through your living room daring anyone to say anything. No one does, but you’re hoping you’re making it clear to not say anything later. Though you highly doubt it.

“You sticking around during the break?” You shut the front door with a click when Sans starts talking.

“Yeah.”

“So Monday’s good to talk to Alphys? We should also figure out what’s up with that…memory thing you were talking about.”

Huh. You kind of forgot about that. “Yeah, that should work. I’ll tell Aria when I see her tomorrow.” You watch a wisp of white smoke escape as you speak. “Who knows about that stuff though? Maybe it’s not a bad thing. I’ll be okay though.” It apparently snowed last night and everything was coated in a thin layer of white.

As you observe your new wintery surroundings, Sans takes a hold of your wrist. He tugs you quickly so his mouth hits yours directly. It’s so fast it barely registers. “If you ever want me to stay over again, just let me know. Preferably when _someone_ can’t voice their opinion on the situation. But you know, whenever you want works too.”

Your response is to babble until you can form the word “Okay.”

“See ya.” You watch Sans walk down the stairs.

“Yeah, bye.”

You lean against the door to open it but when you move your body into it the door jams when you hit something solid.  

“Ouch!” The door seemingly responds.

“Caroline?”

You hear shuffling happening on the other side of the door followed by something smashing into the floor. The mass in front of the door in gone so you push the door open with ease. Mercedes is stretched across the entire couch with her foot latched on the armrest, Dena’s at your rarely used dining room table barely sitting in a chair, and Caroline is on the floor next to the coffee table which is overturned.

“What are you guys doing?” You ask as a growl, but you already know the answer. Listening to roommates conversations with boys, it’s a thing all of you have done before to each other. You’ve only even been on the inside of the apartment in this type of situation and to be honest, you’re a much better look out than Caroline.

Dena lets herself crash to the floor. “Sorry Chara! But he actually stayed over! I can’t believe you did that! You never do that!” She falls back onto the floor. She’s clearly in a state of shock.

“I…we…didn’t do anything!” You shout in frustration. “You guys are jerks, it’s not what you think…Caroline!” You turn to the shortest of the roommates, hoping she’ll come to your defense as she always does when you give her puppy dog eyes.

“I’m sorry, but it’s kind of nice when it’s not me. It’s usually me.” She shrugs with an empathetic smile on her face.

“Come on guys, we shouldn’t bother Chara about it.” Mercedes cuts in, pulling herself into a criss-cross sitting position on the couch. “But…it really isn’t like you Chara…was it weird?” She practically whispers, like no one knows what she would be talking about.

You flush. “I told you guys already nothing serious happened.” Dena blows a raspberry from her corner of the room. You blow one back. “If anything ask Caroline, she’s the one who dated that ice monster last year.” Take attention off yourself, good. You mentally apologize to Caroline for totally throwing her under the bus.

“Oh yeah, I forgot about him.” Mercedes hums, as Caroline crawls around the coffee table to pick it back up. “What ever happened to him?” She questions, but Caroline just rolls her head in a circular formation.

“Eh, he was nice and everything, but he didn’t talk too much. He was too emotionally unavailable.” She plops down on the couch next to Mercedes.

“OHMYGOSH.” After a lengthy time of actually keeping her mouth shut, Dena finally pops up. “Wait, I know what to do!” She practically jumps up, running into the hallway where the bedrooms are. After a few seconds she runs back out, wearing Sans jacket, which is oddly a little small on her, and a pair of your oversized sunglasses.

“Hey!” You cross your arms over your chest. “What the hell?”

“Sorry! I’ll give them back in a sec, just…” Dena repositions herself so she’s facing Caroline with her hands forming into finger guns. “I would say,” She tries to use her deepest voice. “He gave you the _cold shoulder._ ”

You, Mercedes and Caroline just stare at her.

You’re the first to go, erupting into a horrible fit of laugher. You clutch your sides, slowly losing the ability to breathe. Mercedes goes next, giving an unattractive snort following by silent heaves. Caroline rolls into her knees, wheezing. You seriously can’t believe Dena just did that, with that smug look on her face. She always does it when she gets all three of you at once. She also starts to crack up. It was just so ridiculous.

Despite everything that’s happening, maybe this sense of normalcy is what you need.

You press against the front door the next day, a little before noon. You’re finally finished with your last exam. You know you destroyed that genetics exam. You make a mental note to thank Sans later.

“Hey! How your last final?” Dena’s sitting in front of the couch in her pajamas, two outfits laid out in front of her.

“It went well, I think. What are you doing?” You drop your bag near the front door and walk over to examine her clothing spread.

“I have my interview today, remember?” That’s right! Dena’s a year ahead of you and your other roommates and has been in the process of applying to medical school. Her interview at the medical school at your university is today. “I can’t decide between these pants suits, since I hate wearing them.” She clicks her tongue against her mouth.

The suits were mostly identical except that one was a soft charcoal gray with a blue shell and the other was black with a red dress shirt.

“Blue one.” You say without hesitation. Dena raises an eyebrow, but brushes it off and agrees.

“You think Aria will be around?” Dena asks, as she gathers both outfits up to go change. It’s not a thing you often see, but you can tell how anxious Dena is.

“Maybe. I think she said she sometimes helps with interviews.”  

“Oh cool! It would sure make me less nervous! Wish me luck!” She runs into her room before you get a chance to respond.

You’re excited, but for some reason you’re also a little nervous.

It’s probably nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the roommates. They very quickly developed on their own even though I hadn't intended for them to be so integrated. I like it.
> 
> I think I've develop this pattern where it goes from terrible thing to good thing or vice versa.  
> I hope it's making the story flow well. Let me know! 
> 
> If you have any questions, or just want to be friends visit my tumblr!  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


	20. Undyne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SO SORRY YOU GUYS
> 
> I wrote like 2 different chapters and totally hated them so I had to start from scratch plus the holidays and it was just a cluster.   
> I will say that updates may be slower from here on out but I'm gunning for minimum 3 updates a week. Thanks for staying with me! 
> 
> Wanna see crap I drew for this, fanart or ask me why I'm so slow? Visit me;  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/

“Monday, huh? Yeah, that I’ll work.”

You’ve seen Aria dressed nice, but she looks like a different person in her white coat and professional dress. It’s sort of strange and it makes her more intimidating than she normally is. She’s in the lobby with a small group of students are dressed in formal outfits. Dena’s in the group, chatting to another interviewee. Most of the medical school interviews were over, but some of the students hung back for more information. You figured it would be an okay time to fill Aria in.

“Awesome. Right after we’re done with lab.” You backup since you’re starting to attract more attention to yourself. It’s not really your thing. “I’ll see you later. See you at home Dena.” She gives you a spastic mini-wave until you’re out the door.

From one nervous roommate to the next. The next morning you parked your car in front of Undyne’s and Alyphs’ house a soft layer of snow blanketed over their front lawn. Mercedes was in the passenger seat of your car, counting one to ten every time she took a breath. There was no way in hell you were letting her drive to her ‘training’ as Papyrus called it. She could barely keep herself together just sitting there.

You nudge Mercedes to leave the safety of your car. She squeaks in response. You can already see Papyrus building…something in the front yard out of the few inches of snow. It’s kind of impressive.

“Small human! Scared human!” Papyrus leaps over his creation with unyielding excitment to the car. You can see Undyne leaning against the door frame, waiting. Mercedes falls back to avoid being enraptured by a hug, leaving you to talk the full brunt of it.

“Hi Papyrus.” You squeak out while you’re slowly being smothered. He examines you for a second while he still has you in the air, and decidedly puts you down when he realizes you’re handling his hug for two people.  

“Pap, is this the nerd we’re helping out?” Undyne walks down the driveway standing directly in front of Mercedes who had not seen her coming. If Mercedes already has a healthy fear around Papyrus then Undyne is the definition of intimidation. This fact certainly not lost on poor Mercedes. She’s pressed so hard into your car she might just become part of the paint.

When you’re full oxygenated, you place yourself between Undyne and Mercedes. You don’t even want to venture what Papyrus told her what the issue was and go for just telling her yourself. “Undyne, this is Mercedes. She’s so overwhelmed with how amazing monsters are she’s developed a phobia of them. Papyrus says he’s going to help her overcome her…problem.”

Undyne’s gratuitous laugher startles you and send Mercedes in the early stages of a panic attack. “Is that was it is? That’s awesome! I like you already!” You would call a code M&M, except you’re the doctor on call, as Aria would say. Papyrus shuffles over and you hope he can do something to diffuse to situation.

But life isn’t that easy. “Scared human! Come with me! Undyne will help us later in training!” Papyrus takes a fistful of Mercedes’ arm and drags into the front yard. You’re surprised when she doesn’t immediately buckle from the stress, but you can see she she isn’t totally with it right now. Could you call that improvement? For now, you’ll say yes.  

“Guess that puts me on the bench for now. Come on, squirt.” Undyne gives you a firm push toward the  porch swing near her front door. You stumble with the force and you can hear her laugh through her teeth behind you.

“So,” Undyne sits before you do, and helps pull you up next to her. The swing is set a little too high. How does Alphys get up here? “Where did you come from anyways?”

With your brow furrowed, you reply. “Huh?”

“I obviously know you work with Alphys, but you just showed up just like Aria did. What is it about science nerds?” She shakes her head, amused with her own joke. You wonder if she really does mean nerd as a term of endearment.

“I don’t know. We became friends when I started working the lab since I’m around the medical science building a lot. She was nice to me, isn’t that how this kind of stuff works?” You know she’s means no harm by her statement. It’s just Undyne. “But what did you mean, Aria just ‘showed up’?”

“Yeah. Didn’t Sans or her tell you? You’re with them all the time.” Undyne smirks, her one good eye trying to read your reaction. “Eh, neither of them talk about that kinda shit too often. She’s a human from the surface. Not like Frisk, who became our besties underground. Maybe a week after we got up here she showed up with Sans to place we were staying. No explanation. And let me tell you, a human making friends with one of us that early on was totally not a thing. But weird than  that was she and Sans didn’t act like friends at all. Not for the first month or so anyways. I thought she was awesome, didn’t take anyone’s shit.”

There’s a solid 15 seconds of silence as you watch Papyrus makes Mercedes practice talking to small snow sculptures of himself. You can tell she’s crying every time he gives another booming instruction. You could probably hear him a mile away. It’s going...adequately.

“After that they were real close, which was good for Sans probably. He had some issues once we got to the surface. That’s what Pap told me anyways. Never acted like it around us.” Undyne kicks one leg out over the other so she’s sitting cross-legged. She’s trying to get you to ask something, and you have to admit, you’ve thought about it a few times, but you couldn’t figure that would be true. So you never asked them. But Undyne was daring you too.

And you’re trying that whole not-such-a-pacifists thing.

“They, uh, never dated each other right?” Oh god, it sounds even worse out loud. You hope Undyne doesn’t tell either of them you asked, that would be super embarrassing. You’re actually kind of afraid of the answer.

Undyne bursts out in a fit of rumbling laugher. “That’s what everyone thinks! But, nah, they’re not like that. They’re like me and Paps except not nearly as cool. You walked right into that.”

There’s a slight ball of tension that dissipates. You know that wasn’t the case at all but Aria’s always so reluctant to talk about their past you could never be sure.  

“Yeah, Papyrus is pretty great. It’s nice he’s doing this for Mercedes. It’s like exposure therapy. I really hope we don’t have to call EMS though. She’s been on the verge of a panic attack for like 10 minutes.”

Papyrus is making Mercedes so some kind of obstacle course while asking her questions about her likes and dislikes. It would be kind of cute, if Mercedes wasn’t a waterfall of tears and mucous. Leaving her standing in a now leveled snow fort as she tries and collect herself, Papyrus bounds over. “Undyne! I request your assistance for phase two of my glorious plan!”

You’re going out on a limb, but you propose that phase two was a failure. Having Undyne pretend to suplex Mercedes while giving her compliment was probably not a good idea. You really should have asked Papyrus to tell you what he was going to do. All the excitement made her pass out for a few minutes.

Luckily, she woke up right before you called an ambulance and you managed to get her inside and to the dining room table so she can sit with a full barrier.

“Scared hu…Mercedes! Please accept my greatest apologies! It seems you were not ready for phase two!” Papyrus stays a good distance back in the kitchen with Undyne. “Yeah, sorry for trying to suplex you. It worked with Frisk.” She shrugs trying to play it cool, but you can tell she feels bad.

Alphys walks in with a warm cup of tea, which smokes a familiar scent into the air. Having only heard the very generals of the situation, Alphys wanted to be of help. Undyne tries to grab at her sweater to stop her but she’s already out of reach. “I t-though you might like s-something to help c-calm you down. T-this always worked for m-me.” You’re sitting ramrod straight, waiting in case you need you catch her head from hitting the table.

Without batting an eye, Mercedes accepts the mug breathing in the warm steam radiating from it. “Thank you, Alphys.”

There’s a few second of deathly silence. Followed by Papyrus;

“I AM INDEED A TACTICAL GENIUS AND WONDEROUS FRIEND!”

“Mercedes! You didn’t…Mercedes!” You latch onto her, shaking her back and forth. After looking at your like you’ve gone clinically insane, she comprehends what actually happened.

“Alphys!” Mercedes whips her head toward the small yellow friend, who looks flustered. She never knew about Mercedes’ condition so her normal shy demeanor is being tested. “I can talk to you! Like a normal person!” Mercedes plants herself in front of Alphys, but just far enough so that there would be no accident touching. Rome wasn’t built in a day after all. 

“Is…is it t-that weird to t-talk to me?” Poor Alphys. You could see Undyne in the kitchen clutching at her sweater with bright, adoring eyes.

“No…I mean…I’ve been really afraid to even interact with monsters but now I can talk to you thanks to Papyrus. And Undyne.” It’s cute to watch the both of them be weirdly nervous around each other.

Papyrus bounds into the dining room shrieking in joy, which send both Alphys and Mercedes reeling. Undyne catches him before he continues his onslaught of terrorizing anxiety driven souls with his love. “You alright, you ‘fraidy cats?”

Alphys gives a weak smile while pressed against the table, and Mercedes can just muster a thumbs up since she’s now back on your side of table, making it vibrate with her trembling.

“She’s cool.” You answer for her.

Papyrus looks defeated, most likely because his hard work earned Alphys a new friend to talk to and he wanted to ‘converse with the new and improved less-scared-human’. Undyne instead offers him a snowball fight for position of head of the royal guard of the front lawn, whatever that means. It’s a deal he takes without hesitation.

Alphys sets up you and Mercedes with some warm drinks to get Mercedes calm and chatting more easily. Turns out they actually have a lot in common. They’re about to start on something when there’s a melodious knock at the front door. There’s no wait for a response when you the door opens.

Sans rounds into the living room, sopping wet. You clap your hands over your mouth to stifle a laugh. You also had no idea he’d be here, but you aren’t complaining.  

“Did y-you get caught in the s-snowball fight?” Alphys tries to act innocent, but she’s sputtering giggles between words.

He shakes a sleeve ro relieve it of a glob of snow. It hit the floor with a wet plop. “Yep. Just not my _fort_ -e.”

Alphys brings Sans to a back area of the house where you’ve never been to go get dry. You’re taking another sip of tea when you hear something clack on the table. Mercedes has her chin in hand, giving you the biggest, smuggest grin you’ve ever seen her even attempt.

“What?” You bring blow over the glossy liquid. You’re still not that good at drinking hot drinks, but you’re getting better. You decides it’s okay to take a sip.

“You look happy. You really like Sans, huh?”

You never get to take a sip. You almost drop the mug, but Mercedes apparently has the foresight to put her hand underneath the cup to keep it from smashing to the floor. People just need to stop giving you tea all together.

After the cup was secure and away from your or the edge of the table you frown at Mercedes. “Why’d you say that?”

She sits back in her chair. “Why else would you have come with me?”

“What? I didn’t know Sans was coming today. I came for you! I came because I didn’t want you to die.”

Mercedes eyes sparkle with appreciation, but your brain does some math. “Wait, did you know Sans was coming?”

Lights out. Mercedes nervously shifts in her chair muttering that she had no idea what you were talking about. You stare at her until she nervously hums that maybe she had an idea. She’s saved when Alphys and Sans walk back into the dining room. He’s wearing just a gray turtle neck without whatever jacket which is a little weird. He’s not nearly as bulky without it, but he’s not small either. Still cute though.

“Oh, l-let me take t-those mugs.” Alphys hurries over, taking the drinks into the kitchen. “Let me help Alphys!” Mercedes jumps out of her chair, and is mostly unphased as she walks past Sans into the kitchen. Alphys tries to protest, but Mercedes practically yelps that she wants to because “I can actually do that now!”

Sans watches her leave the room, completely unbelieving of the situation. “Did…Papyrus’ training really work?”

“I want to say yes, but they may have also just scared so badly when Undyne tried to friendship suplex her that they might have shocked her fear right out her. It’s still a work in progress.” Sans pulls up the chair Mercedes was in and drops himself next to you.

“My bro is the best at whatever he does. I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised.” Sans tilts the chair back and bit giving you a quick glance. You’re becoming painfully aware that you’re technically alone with him yet again. You hadn’t seen him much on Friday, still finishing up with some of his grad students, so you were totally composed. But now you could feel your heart rate pick up and your brain decided to start replaying things that happened earlier in the week.

Not really what you need right now.

“Yeah.” You say absentmindedly. “Papyrus is awesome.” You continue to kind of stare into the void because it’s honestly safer than making eye contact with Sans.

You unfortunately don’t have a choice, when he locks your cheeks between his fingers. “What was that? You sound a little _iced_ over. No reason to be so _cold_.”   

You pry his hand off your face because he can see you turning red. “That’s pretty snarky coming from someone who was drenched from snowballs in the face just a little while ago.” You turn your nose up to him, but he doesn’t relent, instead taking the back of your neck and forcing your head over his shoulder. You can feel heat burn in your face.

“That’s nothing compared to how drenched I can make you.”

Well, shit. That was completely unexpected. You were finally starting to get the hang of acting normal around him again and then he pulls this.

The worst part is that if it weren’t for somebody, you would find yourself trying to figure out how to make him make good on what he said. Such is not the case, and you escape his grasp seeing as you already desecrated Alphys’ and Undyne’s backyard and managed to not actually get caught. No reason to test your luck now.

You stumble for words before anything comes to mind. “Oh yeah,” You wave your hands around to put some distance between you and Sans. He’s visibly amused by how flustered you are. “Aria said Monday works for her, I didn’t get to tell you. Looks like we’re totally set.” You babble, peppered with nervous laughter in attempt to distract and calm yourself down.

You’re saved when Papyrus and Undyne run back into the house. “Good effort solider, but you can’t beat an old ocean salt like me!”

“Undyne, I thought you’re from Waterfall.”

“Details, details.”

The next few hours is more, slower paced training for Mercedes which goes significantly better overall.

You really wanted to be more helpful. But Sans his hand so far up your thigh under the table you might actually explode. You decide if this is good or bad, but you don’t put an end to it. Ugh.

Hopefully Monday has a much clearer outcome that whatever the fuck is going on now.

Dammit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a cute chapter, that can't be good.   
> WE TALK TO ALPHYS THE NEXT CHAPTER LETS GET SHIT MOVING


	21. Alphys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHO HAS SCHOOL TOMORROW.  
> Med school sucks for breaks. Ah well. 
> 
> Have some plot.

“Hey Alphys.” Aria lets the heavy metal door clank shut behind her as she walks in near the end your work hours on Monday.

“H-hello Aria.” Alphys doesn’t look up from the flask of bubbling red solution. Finally, finally, a mixture of boss monster magic, ethanol and acetaminophen was proving to be stable. A mixture earlier had too much magic which made the glass crack, which causes the pain killer to react to the heat and almost blew your eyebrows off. That is, if Sans hadn’t dragged you away right in the nick of time.

This new mix, however, was starting to settle into an almost gel like mixture. It was insanely exciting. Alphys wastes no time getting it into a sealed container and rushes off to the fridges.

Sans is on standby in case of emergencies, but with the liquid safely stored and Alphys out of ear shot he gathers the three of you into a huddle.

“You two sure we should do this?” Sans shoves his hands in his lab coat pockets, look skeptical.

Aria waves him off. “Yes. You want to help Chara don’t you?” Sans grunts something that sounds like a yes.

“I’ll go get her. Here, hold this.” Aria drops the locket from Frisk into your hands. You feel a surge go through your body and you’re thankful you had your weekly dose of determination earlier that day. “Also Sans,” Aria turns back quickly, finger pointed. “You’re going to explain the whole Chara thing from the underground to her. You know what happened the best and she’ll listen to you.” She practically runs toward Alphys to dodge Sans’ argument.

“Damn it, I knew she was going to do that.” Sans leans against the lab table looking defeated. You make your way over after you finish cleaning up and stand next to him.

“Thanks for doing this. I know you don’t really want to. Sorry I’m messing up your life.” You play with the edge of your own lab coat. That weird black gunk left yellow stains. Your actions are interrupted when Sans grabs one of your hands giving you a hard, reassuring squeeze.

“Don’t worry about it. In any other case, I would never do this. Neither would Aria.” He lets go of your hand when Aria and Alphys starts to walk up, leaving you feeling the sterile cold.

There’s worry pressed into Alphys’ strained smile. “Is e-everything okay? W-what do you need to t-talk to me about?”

Sans has Alphys sit down as he starts to run Alphys through Frisk’s journey in the underground. You’d heard it from Frisk before, but hearing Sans retell the story was...different. When Frisk told it, there was so much sadness and sense of self-blame you wish they didn’t have. It made your heart hurt. With Sans there was such a deep set anger, he was constantly having to bite back works and keep himself at an even tone. Alphys stops when he starts to describe Frisk resetting.

“Sans…y-your saying Frisk c-could…still can…we c-could never m-make it work.” She keeps her gaze to the floor. You whip your head to Aria who’s sitting on the counter as silent as you’ve been. She shakes her head and shrugs. She doesn’t know what Alphys means either.

Sans simply nods and continues on. Frisk was right about not knowing anything detailed between Chara, Frisk and Toriel’s other child, you can’t remember their name. He only knew when Frisk can became Chara, and that by the time he did know it was far too late. Alphys tries to argue, saying that it must be a mistake. Chara is a royal child a symbol of hope. You and Aria solidify Sans’ statement by shaking your heads with hard frowns. You can see the fight drain out her when she exhales.

“Does T-Toriel know a-any of this?”

“No. I think we’d rather keep it that way for now.” Sans doesn’t explain anymore, but Alphys seems to understand.

“So w-why tell me t-this now? It’s been more t-than five years. W-why are we d-digging at old wounds?”

“Because our Chara seems to have inherited…Toriel’s Chara. There’s a strong chance she’s related which is how it they may have jumped from Frisk to Chara. We might have a way to test both the DNA in case you need it. And she’s for sure the host, Alphys. That’s how Chara got hurt a while back.” When Sans looks over the lights in his eyes are dim as Alphys looks at you for confirmation.

“It’s true.” You mumble. “They haven’t done worse, yet. But…Alphys is there any way you can help?” You hold out the locket to her. She slowly raises from the chair and shuffles over in her regular Alphys way. You drop the locket into her thick claw as she takes a hard moment to study it.

“I-I’m not sure if I t-totally believe this. B-but I do know t-that I don’t want you t-to be hurt. So I’ll h-help.” You felt so horrible unloading all this onto her.

“Thank you, Alphys.” Aria says without missing a beat. “We didn’t want to drag you into this, I promise. But we’re running out of options. Do you have any idea what we can do?”

“Actually,” Alphys studies the locket for a second and then yanks a hair from the top of your head. You yip in surprise, hands flying to the crown of your head. Sans and Aria exchange confused looks. “I t-think I do. If I c-can use Toriel’s Chara’s DNA in c-combination with determination and m-maybe a few other things we can h-have something stronger to c-combat them. It’s not a final s-solution. But it m-may work better t-than what we’re doing now.”

“Oh!” Aria jumps from the table so she’s standing next you. “Sort of like how antibiotics work? Like quinolones?”  

“Correct. I-I would like all of you to s-stay around for the next f-few hours, please.”

No problem there. Sans had already wandered off to who knows where and Aria dragged you into one of the stadium style classrooms where she was studying. There’s maybe two hours of silence, with only the thin hum of music coming from Aria’s oversized headphones. You tack away on Aria’s laptop to keep yourself entertained until she stop her music.

“Oh yeah.” There’s a slight smugness in her words. “I forgot to ask.”

“What?” You sit up from the desk you’re laying back on. This can’t be good.

“How did you convince Sans to go along with this anyways? I tried before and he flat out refused, the asshole.” You know the normal tone of Aria’s voice when she’s annoyed at Sans. This is not that tone. There’s almost a laugh to it.

“I just asked.”

“Really? Dena said he was at your place.”

Your breath hitches in your breath while your stomach drops into your feet. What the fuck did Dena say to her? Dena likes to make all sorts of theories and implications so who the hell knows what she told anyone! Aria looks like she’s going to ask something, and you’re sort of freaking out inside. You have to clear it up before gets out of hand as you mind races too quickly to actually think this out.

“Well, that’s…”

“I didn’t have sex with him!” You blurt out, interrupting what is sure to be an accusation.

“good…what?”

“What?” You voice is almost a whisper. She’s just staring at you like a deer standing in the middle of the road waiting to be hit. Oh no. She didn’t know.

“I…I wasn’t saying that. I was just teasing you. That’s, uh, good too I guess.” Aria rubs the back of her head looking uncomfortable. But nowhere near as uncomfortable as you must actually be.

“I thought you said Dena said he stayed over.”

“She only said he was there Wednesday. Wait, he stayed over? Actually, you know what? I don’t want to know. Not my business.” Aria slides the chair out from the lengthwise table, making her way to the end of the row. She’s already half way up the stadium steps toward the second floor before you decide you follow.

She stops when she hears you practically running up the steps to catch up with her but doesn’t turn around. “You know, I’m kind of tired of you and Sans treating me like I’m doing something wrong. I already said I was leaving it alone, so why are you freaking out? I’m supposed to be your friend, not the cock-block police, okay? Sorry for not wanting either of you to get hurt.” She continues to take long strides up the steps you know you won’t be able to keep up with.

“I just don’t want to disappoint anyone.” The words come out shaky. “I feel like all I can do is keep asking for help and I just keep making everything harder on everyone. I’m sorry.” Aria turns around, but she’s too far and it’s too dark that close to exit to see her expression.

“I feel like this all my fault. That if I was stronger…like Frisk…or you…” You hold your breath to keep yourself from tearing up.

“Chara.” Aria slowly walks down to the step you’re at. “You don’t really think that, do you? You’re not weak. And not a single part of this is your fault.”

You know that. But it’s hard to feel like you’ve done anything to help. You’re not partial to the idea of needing to be saved and it’s slowly been eating at you. “Guess I’m just unlucky, huh?”

Aria snorts. “Yeah, maybe. Better unlucky than dead.”

“Thanks, I feel a lot better.” You rolls your eyes. You wring your hands for a moment. “And to be honest, you’re not the problem when it comes to clock blocking.” You rock back on your heels. It takes Aria a good bit to figure out what you’re insinuating, but when she does, she almost takes a misstep down a step while she hisses a laugh through her teeth.

“It’s good to know at least one Chara actually listens to me!” She teases once she regains her balance.

“It’s not funny.”

 She might have continued but her phone starts rattling down where both of your stuff was still situated. Aria hops down at least two steps, sometimes three, at a time to get to and no way in hell are you even going to try that.

“It’s Alphys. She says we should come back to the lab.”

Damn, that scientist works quick.

Back in the lab, Alphys explains how this new determination serum is expected to work in technical terms, but the complexity is completely lost on you. Good thing you’ll be the test subject, you think. “We can test t-the final product on Friday, s-since Chara recently had her normal determination injection. We don’t want any c-cross reactions.” Everyone agrees that’s a good plan. “We also n-need a full proof way to t-test that this other Chara is fully subdued.”

Aria hacks out a laugh which earns you a wide-eyed stare down from Sans. You bite you bottom lip and shrug, giving the best non-verbal sorry you can.

“There’s a way, Alphys.” You finally say. “I can do that.” Aria blows a lackluster raspberry at your solution. Alphys nods and continues on with her report.

“J-just to make sure I’ve g-got my calculations correct, I’ll n-need to check your soul, please. I n-need to check HP and LV.”

“You don’t really think Chara has LV, huh Alphys?” Sans says, more as a fact rather than a question.

You raise your hand. “What are those?”

“HP can be considered a monster’s health, for humans it’s a scale for how much damage their soul sustains.” He explains. He bobs back and forth until he’s ready to continue. “LV…well it stands for level of violence and that only applies to humans. You get it by killing monsters.”

“But there’s no way our Chara has any.” Aria huffs, but Alphys shakes her head. “I-I still need to c-check. You know t-that. Sans? C-can you pull her s-soul? I’m r-really out of p-practice.”

“Sure.”

The first and only time Sans had removed your soul, he still hated you and it was not a fun experience. You flinch when he raises his hand. “Chara, it’ll be okay. It won’t be like last time.” He says in a voice low enough that no one else can hear. “You’re safe with me.”

You feel your heart flutter for a second, but the sensation is replaced by a force deep in your chest. It pulls away from your body, revealing the same pitch black heart. Except now little black wisps of smoke dance around it as it shimmers in its own dull light. It’s actually kind of pretty looking at it through fresh eyes.

Sans immediately backs away from you, hand protecting the lower part of his face. “What the fuck.” You can hear Alphys take a very audible gasp.

“What is it? I can’t read souls!” Aria tries to peek around Sans, but he pushes her back when she tries to get close.

“H-her LV…it’s…so high.” Alphys mumbles keeping her distance.

You can feel the panic starting and you start to hyperventilate slightly, reacting poorly to Sans and Alphys palpable fear. Have you been hurting monsters and not knowing about it? Are you really blacking out like Sans says you are? Oh god.

“Hold the fuck up!” Aria growls, pushing Sans arm of her way. “There is no way Chara has killed anyone. Don’t you think someone would know if monsters or people were up and disappearing? I know this is a trip down the memory lane from hell for you guys but come on.”

Alphys continues to jostle herself around, but Sans actually takes in what Aria says. “Guess that’s true.” His tone is still low and questioning. “But how the hell can you get LV without…it’s still a huge problem either way. Think you can do something to fix that too Al?” She gives a curt nod, jotting down what you suppose she needs.

“That’s all I-I need. You can p-put it back now.” Alphys squeaks out as Sans pushes your soul back from wence it came. “I’ll do my b-best to get something t-that will work for you Chara. I w-want to help.”

After everything had calmed down a bit, Aria returned to the classroom to continue studying and Alphys to finish your new medication. You and Sans were sitting in the lobby. “Sorry for freaking out back there.”

“That’s okay. I guess it was a shock to everyone.” You give Sans a half smile, but you still feel kind of crappy. Aria had to be right, it was the only thing that made sense. But then…can you get LV any other way?

“Anyways,” Sans exaggerates the word, you can tell he’s changing the subject. His grin is huge and cocky and you are not digging it. Like you don’t know what he’s going to ask. Like he doesn’t know the answer. Ass.

“What exactly was your plan to check if the other Chara is really blocked by your new drugs?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAHAHA what's the plan, I don't know the plan, hahaha. 
> 
> But I've seriously been waiting forever to put this in the right part of the story. Hope you liked it.


	22. Heat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I TRIED SO HARD YOU GUYS. I hope it's up to par.  
> I changed the rating tags just in case. There will be more as the story continues, don't worry. 
> 
> And I'm apologizing in advance for this chapter and probably the next few.

“What do you mean you’re not coming?” You lean over the edge of the podium Aria’s sitting at. You’re in the anatomy lab, but only for a minute. There’s first years milling around and a body bag is actually open but you refuse to look.

“One, you’re not supposed to be in here right now.” You’re aware, but Aria said she wasn;t coming out of the lab, what were you supposed to do? “Two, I have a test Monday.  And three,” Aria gets up and jabs an anatomic skeleton model behind her in the chest. “And this is three. I don’t need to be around to know if that medication you took today actually works, right?”

You keep your eyes straight, reminding yourself to not look in any direction. “Everyone’s going though.”

“No. Now get out of here before I get in trouble and you throw up.” She sticks her tongue out as you shield your eyes to leave the lab.

“Still not coming, huh? Told you she wouldn’t.” Leaning against the wall, Sans smirks.

“That’s pretty cocky considering you won’t even go in the anatomy lab.”

“They have skeletons suspended by their heads in there.”

“Sans. Of all the things in that room, you’re freaked out by the plastic models?”

He shrugs and starts walking toward the elevators. “Guess they’re just not the crowd I like to _hang around_.” You groan, hurrying in to the elevator before he does. You try to smash the door close button but he’s only a few steps behind you. No that you would have actually closed him out for real.

“Am I pushing all the wrong _buttons_? I guess we were bound to have our _ups and downs_.”

Ups and downs? Hell, if that wasn’t the truth than what is?

“Chug, chug! Come on, squirt is that the best you’ve got!?” Undyne chants as you cough up sparking, magic beer. It fizzles in your throat before forcing itself down. Sans grabs it away from you before you get another chance to try. You didn’t get to go to Grillby’s super often and magic beer is better than any other in your personal opinion. You want it, but you’re probably not getting it back even though it’s only your second drink.

“Sans!” Undyne slams her fist on the table, violently shaking every glass unlucky enough to be on the bar top. “What a wet blanket!”

“Undyne, Sans does not wish to be bathed in the alcoholic regurgitation of the small human, Chara!”

Oh good, Papyrus does actually know your name. That doesn’t stop both you and Sans from cringing at the mention of that lovely memory though.

Undyne continues to slam the table, but now it’s accompanied with hearty laughter. “Damn Paps, who taught you say that?”

“Alphys!”

“Damn right! Best girl in the world!” Undyne hooks Papyrus over the shoulder, grin almost reaching to her fin-like ears. You can tell she’s putting on more of a show than normal since Alphys chose to not come to the bar. “You and me, we’re on such a roll Pap! Let’s take on the dogs at poker! They’ll never know what hit ‘em! You two nerds coming?” Undyne’s shit eat grin could even rival Sans’ right now.

You held your hands up and gave an apologetic look. There’s no way you’re playing cards with those dogs. They’re just too good. Sans also declines, saying it’s too dog-eat-dog out there. Undyne says he’d be no fun to play with anyways and drag Papyrus away.

You turn back to face the bar. “Can I have my drink back?” You reach out for the glass but Sans pulls it further away. “You’re not feeling nauseous at all? Dizzy? Don’t know what’s going on?” He peppers, sort of adding insult to injury.

“Oh, please. You don’t care about how I feel. You just want to stay clean.” You stand on the rungs of the barstool so you can make a final attempt to get your drink back.

It’s a failed attempt because Sans intercepts by wrapping a bony hand around your arm. “You don’t think I care about how you feel?” Sans chastises you in a joking tone, but you can feel him pulling you face closer to his. Your face starts to heat up with the change in personal space.

“See, look at that. You’re already getting flushed. Maybe we should go outside to cool you down. We’ve got a job to do anyways.” He lets you go, and you drop back into your seat.

“Are you serious? It’s freezing outside.” While it’s true there are a few people milling around the front terrace, you will not be one of them. Plus, you’re doing anything in front of people. People!

Sans dramatically throws his hand over his chest. “You don’t trust me?”

You take a few good seconds to think about that. You see his expression change from assumed to mild annoyance. “Sans, it’s _fucking_ freezing outside.” He rolls his eyes, displeased with your answer.

It a weird way, it pleases you that Sans can’t reach the floor while sitting on a bar stool so when he hops off he stumbles a little bit. You blow air out through your teeth. “Oh, and I’m the one who’s had too much?”

“Hey, I make the jokes. You, come with me.” Sans links his hand with one of yours, pulling you from the bar. The bartender, the same green flamed coated monster cocks her head, but you mentally tell her you don’t really know what’s going on. She bounces on her feet and then goes back to filling a pitcher.

Against better judgment, you walk through the back door to the rear parking lot. “I see you didn’t take your bike. That’s because it’s cold as hell.”

Sans sighs and pushes open a rickety gate. “Are you finished?”

“It’s cold and now I’m going into a dark alley with a skeleton.”

“Apparently you aren’t.”

You know you’re being annoying. Its part alcohol, part cold, part freaked out. No matter how on top of it you tried to act, you were directly told by Alphys earlier that day to make sure you do whatever it is that makes the other Chara react at some point today and tell her if the desired effects were achieved. You don’t know how she would feel knowing her new medical creation was being put through the ropes in an alleyway on the side of Grillby’s. You weren’t sure how you felt about it.

It’s not as dark past the gate, the area illuminated by small standing lights emitting warmth from them. In fact, it’s not even cold anymore but you’re definitely still outside. You whirl around to Sans who closes the gate. “It’s a break spot for the fire monsters. Too cold outside for them to really _cool off_. Which you also kind of need to do. _Chill_.”

The bench placed there is small, barely enough room for two people so you’re squeezed up together.

“This is…weird.” You finally say after a few long moments of sitting in silence. Sans nods into his hand, elbow resting on the arm of the bench.

“I’ve got an idea. How about you ask me questions. For each one I answer, I get to do something to you, based on how good or bad the question is. Get the ball rolling.”

You’re wary of who’s actually benefitting here. But you suppose it’s worth a try. “Okay.” You rock back and forth for a second before thinking of anything. “How old are you?”

Sans picks his head up out of his hand. “In human years?”

“Yes? What are monster years?”

“That’s two questions.” There it is, that shit-eating grin. You purse your mouth, arms folded, waiting for your answer.

“Monster ages work differently than humans, mostly because we had no access to the sun. Our years and timeframes from the underground don’t match up well with the calendar cycle up here. But if I had to venture a guess, late 20s, early 30s?”

That’s a relief. You were worried for a second he would be like 500 years old and that would be kind of weird. He could also be ten or more years older than you, which is only marginally okay. Before you can dwell on it, Sans already is using one hand to press the small of your back closer to him, other hand gripping a shoulder so your mouth had nowhere to go but to his. It’s a deep kiss, the kind that almost sucks the breath out of you with slight exploration around each other’s mouths. He runs his hands up past your cheek and into your hair. There’s a roughness about the way he pushes your head forward so that your mouths are completely connected that you’re really into. But it’s over right as it starts. You’re very aware of the disappointment on your face when he pulls away.

Sans leans back into his previous position. “Next question.” He’s seriously committing to this game, apparently. If one player wants to play mean, you can do that too.

“How old is Toriel?”

Brow bones go up. You congratulate yourself for catching him off guard. “Uh, maybe late 30s. She stopped aging like Asgore did when their kid passed. Boss monsters, what are you gonna do?” He shrugs, looking sort of listless. Crap, maybe you went too far. It’s too late when you see he’s still got at that huge grin when he hoists you onto his lap.

“If you want to play mean, we can do that.” There’s a faint blue glow seeping from Sans’ eye which travels to the oversized zipper of your jacket. The light yanks open the zipper with alarming speed, while Sans’ hands are already pushing your shirt up.

“H-hey, we’re outside!” You voice is already way too unsteady as his hands travel under your shirt and bra. “No one’s coming out here.” Is all he responds with before something cool and blue is trailing up your abdomen. The noise you make is somewhere between a moan and cry, which is maximally embarrassing. His hands are extremely textural, ranging from completely smooth to uncomfortably coarse, but all of it feels good. You can feel every bump against your skin, which is becoming more sensitive by the second. You grab onto the back of his head, giving him the okay to move. He continues to knead your chest while doing generous laps with his magic tongue, slowly trailing higher and higher. Shivers run up your spine.

He’s at the base of your breast when he finally backs off. He keeps you in his lap, but he at least has the courtesy to pull your jacket together.

“Next.” His voice is deep and throaty. You know the only reason she’s stopping is because he wants to win.

“You’re an ass.”

“That’s not a question. Speaking of, how are you feeling, by the way? Nothing feel like interference?” He shifts you around on his lap, so you’re completely facing in front of him.

“Acutally, I feel fine. Not a peep.” You’re a little shocked because you actually managed to forget for al little bit and you can see Sans’ shoulders relax. Tense without muscles, what a concept. But if you want this to continue you have to think of something good. “Why are we doing this? I thought you couldn’t stand me before.”

Your jacket is back open without an answer, just one of Sans’ hand finding itself in its previous position. You’re about to protest, but he’s starts talking before you get a chance to.

“Are you crazy? Do you have any idea how hot you are?” Hot’s not normally a word you get. Usually it’s adorable, cute things more suited for your stature. It’s a welcome change. “Do you know how pissed I too see someone like you walking around possessed by that thing?” Tongue hits your chest without warning, a fast gasp escaping your mouth. You melt into the motions as he rakes your back with his fingertips. 

His words are followed by something solid slide against your crotch. The heel of Sans’ hand grinds between your legs, giving you a dull pressure that feels way too good causing more heat to build in your core than there already was. You give him a confirmatory groan, that yes, that’s good. You have to hook your arms around his neck so as not to be pushed off by the increasing speed of Sans’ hands. You continue to grind up against him, and he returns a satisfied noise.  

“Was that the first time at the lab?” Most of your words come out as moans, but more questions the better right?

“Nah.” He mouths into your throat. You arch your back, pushing into him further to show you approve. He goes back and forth between tasting your skin and speaking, leaving with shocking moments of cold. “Probably six months earlier just around the bio building” Sans’s hand leaves your crotch, throbbing and needing, but starts to work at the buttons of your jeans. “Did some background to see if you were doing the lab thing, I put your name at the top when I saw you were applying so Alphys would be sure to pick you.”

“Wait.” You move your hands between him and you, pushing his shoulders back. “What do you mean?”

“Huh?” Sans’ face is flushed, slightly confused. His fingers are still anchored to those buttons.

“What did you mean you put my name at the top?” There’s a hardness in your voice that shouldn’t have been able to appear, but there it is.

Sans realizes what actually came out of his mouth. “I…to watch Chara…it wasn’t…”

You scramble off him, shoving your shirt down and zipping up your jacket with the same furiously his magic had. “Are you telling me I didn’t earn that position?!” Your voice is low, but it’s still a little screechy due to previous events. Sans doesn’t move.

“You…this whole time…it was because of Chara?!” Stupid. You feel so stupid. You dig your fingers into your hair. Everyone around you, all the first you made…anger bubbles into your throat. “And then what?! You would get Chara out and then…bang me?! Was that it!?”

“Chara, no, listen for a second…” Sans stands up, trying to keep you calm, but you’re far past that. He shakes his head, arm outstretched. His face is downcast.

“No! Don’t touch me!” You shout, slamming open the gate. "Guess you fucking won your little game!" Is the last thing you say to him before storming back into Grillby’s. You can tell he doesn’t follow because the door doesn’t open immediately after you come in. But you couldn’t leave. Papyrus had driven you.

You swallow hard and stomp out to the terrace. Papyrus waves at youas you pass, so you try to act fine for his sake and wave back before throwing yourself outside again. There’s no warm place here, but you’re so angry you don’t care. You shout gibberish and pace in circles until someone stops you.

“Whoa, calm down there.”

The voice comes from a big dude sitting at one of the steel tables, but he’s vaguely familiar. You know you’ve seen him multiple times, but he’s wearing a heavy winter coat with the hood up.

He places his hand over his chest. “You almost break my ribs and now you don’t remember me? I’m crushed.”

You wrack your brain, before it hits you. “Manny?”

“Oh good. Chara, right?” You nod your head. “You wanna sit? Or talk about whatever the hell that was? I’m good for a listen, ask Aria.” Oh that’s right, he a medical student. Aria study together often since. If he’s friends with her, he must be trustworthy to some extent.

“My positioned at the lab was rigged.” You hit the metal chair hard, but your still steaming so the pressure doesn’t shock you as much as you normally do. “Sans put my name at the top for…personal reasons. His own reasons.” You grunt.

Manny shakes his head and laughs. “You are still in undergrad aren’t you?” It’s a little condescending the way he said it. You’ll wait to see if he has a point to make before getting angry with another guy tonight. “Listen. I’m 28. If I get an opportunity, no matter what the means, I’m going to run with it. No one in this world gets in just by a stellar resume. You have to be someone they want. Are you good at what you do in the lab? Do you know you’re smart?”

You nod your head again.

“So then it was something that worked out for you. It’s not like you cheated to get there. And if I know Sans at all, which is just enough, he’s also smart enough to have picked someone who wasn’t going to fuck over Alphys.” Manny kicks his feet on the table. “Feel a little better?”

“Yeah, actually.” You give him a quizzical look. Manny laughs for a second before explaining. “I study with three girls all under 25. You get good at this shit after a while.”

You jump over and give him a quick hug, one to thank him and two because with your anger subsided, you’re absolutely freezing again. “Also,” You settle back into your seat. “Don’t you have a test Monday?”

“Yep. Aria’s been texting me for like an hour. She’s gonna kill me but I really needed a drink.”

You both laugh before getting up. You wave goodbye to Manny and tell him he should study a bit. He shrugs and says everything is luck anyways. You go back inside because you at least tell Sans you’ve calmed down. Even if you are still a little angry with him.

“Papyrus,” You walk over to the poker table, and see he and Undyne are losing. Badly. A large white dog high-fives a smaller white one. You had done a quick once over of the bar and even checked in the back, but you couldn’t find Sans anywhere. “Do you know where your brother is?”

“Yes small human! He said he was unwell and returned home!”

He went home? He was the one who pissed you off!

This can’t be good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...the medicine worked. 
> 
> I just, it's so hard to write this stuff. I'm working on it. 
> 
> GAH.


	23. Speak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm apologizing again.  
> I like drama. I like ruining things.

You’re slumped over a plush cream colored couch, back to the seat cushions, legs dangling over the armrest. The drive to your parent’s house for the holidays didn’t take long, but it felt like the drive went on forever. Leaving the bar the night before was mildly upsetting considering Sans just up and disappeared. You texted Papyrus after he dropped you off at your apartment at returned to his home. All he said was that Sans was in his room, door locked and he didn’t sound happy about it.

You tried to text him a few times between last night and what was now afternoon on Saturday. If you didn’t have to go home this morning you might have even stopped by his and Papyrus’ house. But it was no use. You weren’t sure if you should be worried, or afraid or what. Mostly you felt crappy.

“Sweetheart, if you stare at your phone any harder you’re going to burn a hole through it.” Your mother knees your feet, indicating that they shouldn’t be on the couch at all. Your response is to make a dramatic exasperated noise as you sit up. Your mom laughs, continuing her inspection of the living room to make sure it’s still spotless. While she’s normally errs on the side of cleanliness, the holidays make her nothing short of the cleanest freak.  

It’s weird to be back at your parent’s house again. Being the youngest by a significant amount of years gave you almost full rein over living arrangements when you were a kid but holidays were usually a gaggle of siblings and significant others and friends and whoever else. It was strange being back without all that, since both of your siblings already had families of their own.

And now Sans wasn’t speaking to you. Awesome.

“Instead of being a lump on my new couch, why don’t you go let Lola out?” She flashes you an innocent smile, but she really does just want you off her new, prized sofa. You’re gone less than 3 years and she replaces you with furniture. Typical.

You walk into the kitchen, which is the fastest way to backyard. It’s hilly back there, but it’s perfect for a certain someone. “Lola? You want to you go out!?” Big, golden, and running at full speed at the sliding glass doors, the overzealous Labrador almost turns you into roadkill. She’s a giant goober, but starting to show sights of her age. You love you anyways.

You slide open the glass door and Lola romps around the backyard before bounding back in your direction. Lola slows so you can do your best to scratch as much surface area as possible. “You know Lola, if you were the one playing poker I would have played. I really think I could beat you. And then nothing would be all weird.” You bury your face into fur. Lola gives a confused yip. She’s only interested in being pet, not your personal problems.

As Lola does her doggy thing around the backyard, so you prop yourself up on one of the many boulders littering the landscape here. You can see Mt. Ebott from your house, it’s probably only 20 miles from here. It looms over the horizon in a way it never had before the monsters arrived. Snow caps the tip, and trails down the smaller path of rolling mountains behind it.

“What do you want out there? I don’t understand.” You whisper to yourself, but sort of to Chara. You know they can hear you when you speak. Just not what you think. Of everything that’s happened to you so far, Chara still remains the most elusive.

_I have no intention of telling you anything._

The shock of hearing a response, causes you lurch back and lose your balance on the boulder. You slide down to hit the snow with a sizable force. Lola trots over to lap at your face and then continues with her own activities one she’s sure you’re fine.

“Did you just talk to me?” You’re not sure where to direct your question.

_I suppose I did. Since when are you able to hear me?_

“Since about thirty seconds ago. I thought you were completely asleep.”

_That medication makes me extremely lethargic, but no. I’m no longer dormant at all. Whatever you’re taking now that the poor, pathetic excuse of a scientist made for you seems to have some adverse side effects, wouldn’t you agree?_

“I’ll say.” You’re still laying on your back, but damp slush is starting to seep in through your less than adequate winter clothing. The medication seemed to have worked well yesterday, but since you had to take the medication twice a day maybe there were some unexpected consequences. This being one of the worst possible things.

_And since I’m alert enough to let you know, could you please stop your affair with that skeletal idiot? It’s extremely annoying and to put it simple, it’s disgusting._

You stand up, brushing whatever snow off you that you can but enough of it has already melted. “You’re the one who tried to hijack me, okay? My body, my rules. Besides, he won’t even respond to me.”

_Just ask the double soul. She seems to have far too many answers for a surface human in any case. Not that it matters any to me._

You clap your hands together to get Lola’s attention. Enough outside time. “Double soul? Are you talking about Aria?” You rolls your eyes at how Chara continues to use insults and descriptive factors to talk about anyone. “You seriously can’t expect me to believe you don’t know everyone’s names.”

_Why should I use their names? They mean nothing to me._

You let out a weepy sigh. “Whatever. Even if I was going to ask her, it’s going to have to wait until she’s done with her exams.”

You wait for a response but it’s completely silent. They did say the medication made them super tired so you hopefully assume they’re down for the rest of the day. You’ll have to tell Alphys about this. You shoot her a quick text but you know to not expect a response for a while. She tends to get overenthusiastic with social media and often misses messages. You know this can’t be a good thing.

“Chara, honey, you I accept you no matter what,” Your mom walks up, throwing an oversized towel over Lola who drops to the ground to roll around in it. “But try not talking to yourself so loud, okay? Great.” She pats your cheek and continues back into the living room.

Oh if only she knew the half of it.

The next couple of days were quiet from an excitement standpoint, both from your parent’s side and no word from Chara. Though your mom did insist that you come with her around town so she could show off “her little scientist.” Your dad still had work, so there was no one to save you from being totted around like when you were in middle school. By the time Monday rolls around you’re completely wiped out. You sleep the vast majority of the day, feeling groggy and listless. When your mom expresses concern, you say it’s probably from the stress of school and working finally catching up with you. She gives you some cold medication and tell you to buck up.

You were sitting on your bed, phone pressed to your ear when your mom finally lets you have a moment to yourself. The dial tone goes on a little long, but you might have called to early. Aria could still be in her exam. But Sans still wasn’t responding to your texts so it really was time to try to figure out what the hell was going on.

_“Hello?”_

“Hey Aria. What’s up? Is this a good time?” You kick a flipped edge of your comforter, which at some point was changed from your favorite yellow one to a new white one with flowers on it.

 _“Yeah, I just finished my exam. I’m heading home for the next week. Everything okay? You sound kinda weird.”_ You can hear a car door close.

“I’ve been really tired lately. Probably just my mom making me run all over town.” You smooth out the comforter in front of you. You wonder for a second if you should say anything about hearing Chara, but decide to wait until you’ve heard from Alphys. “So weird question, have you talked to Sans in the last few days?”

 _“Actually, no. I was just all over the place this weekend. Why? Is everything okay?”_ There’s a ting of worry in her voice.

“I was kind of hoping you would know. He hasn’t responded to my texts since Friday after he left Grillby’s. But I know he’s okay because Papyrus told me so. He’s mostly been in his room.”

 _“So you don’t know what happened at all? I guess I’ll try to ask later, but if he’s been holed up it could take a while.”_ She trails off, sounding frustrated.

“We, uh, kind of had a fight. But it was because I found out Sans rigged the applications so I’d get the lab position so he could watch the other Chara! I got really angry, but that’s a normal reaction right? I didn’t do anything wrong?” You felt dumb, you know that’s not your fault. Even if you overreacted you still have a right to. Hopefully?

There a long stretch of silence. _“I didn’t know he did that. What a shitty thing to do!_ ” A wave of relief hits you. So you weren’t being irrational. _“It’s a good thing you’re so smart, otherwise Alphys would have had his head on a spike.”_ You guess Manny really was right about all this.

You slide forward on your bed, almost falling off the edge. “So be being upset wasn’t a bad thing right?”

_“What? No. You should be pissed. He didn’t even think about you as a person when he did that. But I can’t imagine he would get upset over that. He knows when he fucks up. Let me stop by his house and I’ll call you back.”_

You sigh. “Thanks Aria. I know you probably don’t want to be dragged into this.”

_“It’s fine. Besides, if Sans is pissy no one happy, especially Papyrus. And no one wants a sad Papyrus.”_

You totally agree with that.

The next few hours are painful to just wait around. You wander around the house, watching the sun set through the windows. You even do the dishes with all of your nervous energy. Your dad sees you doing chores, praises you for being a prime example of a child and pats you on the head before continues to the basement. You father is a man of few words and you’re totally fine with that. Balances out with your mom.

When you phone rings again right after dinner you lunge at it with a horrible ferocity. You mom and dad seem a little worried, but you tell them it’s something the lab very important and bolt up to your room.

You put on your best nonchalant voice as you softly close to door. Your parents are already worried. “Hey.”

_“Hey Chara.”_

That’s not a good tone. Aria’s voice is low and subdued, sounding so defeated.

“I guess now it’s my turn to ask if something’s wrong.”

_“Well…he didn’t say anything exact. But he wouldn’t talk about you though. He just said to ask you, but obviously neither of us are filled in.”_

“We’re still at square one then.” You pull at the ends of your hair. All that build up for nothing.

There’s a long pause before Aria sighs again. _“Actually…Chara…I think square one is where you should go back to. All the way back.”_

Your stomach flips. “What does that mean?”

_“Remember…remember how I said not to get your hopes up about Sans? And that old habits die hard?”_

Your stomach drops in your feet while you feel like you’re going to throw up all at the same time. Of course that’s how it’s been, how it’s going to be, how it probably always was. There’s no way anyone who already doesn’t make commitments would wait around for some kid with a genetic predisposition for a demon child from hell.

_“Chara? You still there?”_

“Yeah, I’m still here.” You use every ounce of willpower to make sure your voice doesn’t crack.

_“You okay?”_

“Yeah, yeah. It’s not like we were ever dating or anything.” You choke out something that sounds like a laugh. “I wasn’t expecting anything, and I already knew that was a thing that could happen. Is happening.”

Though you can’t see her, you know she must look skeptical. _“If you say so. If it helps, I already bitched him out. But if you want to talk, you can call me whenever.”_

“Thanks, Aria. But really, I’m fine. Thanks.”

_“Uh, okay. I’ll talk to you later.”_

“Later.”

You lean back on your head board trying to process what just happened, giving your phone a toss. It hits your comforter with a soft plap. You feel like shit. All you want to do is hide yourself under the covers for the rest of your life and cry. But you refuse to. You knew this could happen, maybe always was happening. You can’t let it break you down, especially not now.

_Can’t say I’m surprised._

“Go away Chara.” You wanted it to sound annoyed, but your voice was finally cracking.

_Monsters are just like humans are now. Being above ground made them just as cold-hearted. It’s that sad? Then again, that skeleton has always been one for hurting people like us._

“Like us? That’s pretty high you to think.” In an odd way, Chara’s being helpful by giving you a way to vent. But you would still rather they just be too tired to speak.

_Some monsters are just trash from the start. If only you knew what he and that disgusting yellow lizard are truly capable of, the things they’ve done…you would be better off without them._

You stay back against the headboard, scraping your nails against the wood. The only person you’d be better off without was Chara, but you’ll take the bait. “Why don’t you tell me then?”

_That’s something I would be willing to do if you do something for me._

That bait you will take no part in. “I don’t think so. I’ll live without knowing.”

_Fine. You’ll agree eventually. As for now, I’m feeling as exhausted as you are. I’m sure we’ll speak again soon._

“Too soon, I’m sure.”

Silence. Everything is soaked in an eerie calm as you see snow fluttering down outside your bedroom window. While it was a pain, you were glad Chara was able to distract you. You know you should be completely overwhelmed, but you’re just so tired.

For once, the feeling of numbness is completely welcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay terrible side effects!  
> PSA never take a medication that hasn't been thoroughly testing in clinical trials.


	24. Sight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hurt my own feelings writing this.

“S-so the only problem is t-that they occasionally t-talk to you?” Alphys paces around her office while you sit in one her yellow chairs.

“So far.” You shrug. Chara actually had only spoken to you one other time besides those two times while you were home. The new term had started back up and was already proving to be a tough one. You managed to do an exceptional job of keeping it together so far, besides the increasing fatigue from the stress of keeping it together.

“Maybe we’ll just add an e-extra dose. Take another p-pill during the day. I’ll do s-some more testing this week.” Alphys gives you a quick smile before ushering you out the door.

Sans is standing near the door rifling through some papers. There’s eye contact for a second but he immediately looks away and starts speaking to Alphys. He walks by without even sparing a glance. Ouch.

You work methodically and alone until it’s time to leave, mostly prepping vials of your new monster medication for testing. It starts in two weeks. Only Alphys is in the lab when you tell her you’re going home. Your chest wretches but you choose to ignore it.

The next time you’re in lab it goes the same. You show up, Sans blatantly ignores you, Alphys acts weird about it and you work on your stuff alone. This is far worse than was Sans was being an asshole to you. He at least had the decency to speak to you then. Talk about being pitched to the trash. But what could you do about it?

“Chara!” Caroline burst into your room, a few days after that. You’re buried under your covers, having had to take a nap. She crosses her arms, trying to be sassy. “Again with the naps? You’ve taken one like every day this week.”

“I’ve been tired.” You grumble, pulling the blanket over your head.

“Well it’s time you woke up! Let’s go to Grillby’s!” Caroline yanks back your warm blanket, exposing you to the cold.

You grab them back. “It’s a Thursday.” Besides, did you really want to go back there, wounds still fresh? Not really.

“Grillby’s starting doing a promotional thing and it should be a lot of fun! Please come with me! Thursdays are the new Fridays!” She pleas in a sing-song voice, still trying to pull you from your nest.

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. And you just don’t want to date human guys. Get Dena or Mercedes to go.” You’re still so damn tired. You could probably sleep through the night at this rate.

Caroline whines in a high pitched noise. That gives you a nice jolt. “Dena laughed at me and said no, and I know she’s been doing better but Mercedes still cried yesterday when the bunny guy next door said hi to her. And you’ve done nothing this week. Please, please, please!”

“Okay, fine!” Anything to make her stop. “I’ll go, but when I say we leave, we leave! Got it?” You jab a finger in her direction, but the effect is lost when she jumps at you, wrapping you in a hug. “Yay! Thank you! Thank you!”

Caroline had already found herself a group of monsters your age to make buddy-buddy with. To be fair, you weren’t being much fun. You were sitting at the bar, now nursing the same beer from an hour ago. You didn’t even want it, but Caroline was so excited to go she offered to drive.

“Hey sweetie. I’ve never seen you here looking so down.” There’s a faint green glow projecting onto the table from the bartender. She’s propped up on both arms, sharp eyes trying to read you.

“I didn’t really want to go out today, but my roommate really wanted to come. I haven’t been feeling so great. Grillby’s is great an all…”

“You’re not offending me, huh. I don’t know how some of these kids come out so often to be honest. But you’re usually here with _that_ whole group.” She does a once over of the bar area but everyone seems content with their situation.

“Uh, yeah. Well, it’s a Thursday.” You’re very off your game today. She shrugs. “That’s never stopped them before, but if you need anything let me know. I don’t like seeing sad faces around here.” Someone calls the bartender over for a refill.

“Chara!” Caroline pops up next to you, face glowing with excitement. “Oh. You don’t look very happy. Come hang out, these guys are fun! They’re going to teach me how to play poker with those fluffy dogs!” She whips around, giving her new friends a wave. You can see there’s one guy who sort of looks like a tree who keeps a lingering look a little too long.

“I’m fine here. You go, have fun for the both of us.” She pouts for a second, but decided to go on ahead without you, to your relief.

The bartender rolls back around, shaking her head at your still mostly full drink. “Your friend is a real firecracker. Most people don’t warm up to monsters that quickly.”

You crack a smile, still looking in Caroline’s direction. “Those sounded like jokes.” When you turn back to the bar, the bartenders face, though coated in flames, is wracked with distress. She shakes it off after a second or two.

 “My uncle who owns the bar, Grillbz, use to be friends with Sans in the underground, you know? I’d met in a bunch of times when I would visit. He’s changed a lot, but still makes those ridiculous jokes.” She shakes her head, like she can’t decide if that’s a good or bad thing. But you don’t really want to talk about Sans right now, despite your slip-up. You’d rather just get him to tell you what’s going on.

“He’s here, you know.” She taps her fingers on the counter top, leaving little wisps of green flame each time she does it. You swallow hard. “Really?”

She runs her hands over her face. “Yeah. Hun, I think you’re a sweet one and you don’t deserve bad things. So I hope you aren’t mad with me.”

“Why would I…”

She cuts you off before you get a chance to finish. “Backroom, one door down from the ladies room.” Someone attempts to flag her down to order a drink. She sighs and does to complete her work.

You stay sitting for a minute. That was certainly ominous, you think. After taking a second to brace yourself for who knows what you push back and slide off the bar stool, wading through small crowds of people. It a damn good turn out, you have to admit. The back hallway to the bathroom is mostly empty, except for two girls gossiping about something that looks exciting. But that’s none of your business.

You stand at the only other door besides the entrances to the bathrooms. You almost wonder if this is a joke. Actually, you really hope this is joke. You know what the alternative means. Do you knock? Is Sans really in there? You decide whatever it may be, you’ll just push the door open.

And you immediately wish you hadn’t. The room is mostly full of fully boxed inventory, but there’s an old couch and table arranged almost like a break room. There, a girl with very full curves and big hair had herself draped over someone else. She’s grinding against him and you try to look away but it’s one of those situations where the shock is keeping your eyes stuck. There’s blue smoke snaking around her head and shoulders. She yanks her head around, realizing someone came in. There’s a few second of the most uncomfortable eye contact you’ve ever had.  

“Ah, uh, sorry, wrong room!” You garble, trying to reach for the door handle but you’re just hitting air since you still can’t look away. As she leans over and your suspicion are completely correct. The person underneath this vaguely familiar girl is indeed Sans.

“Chara?” Only took him two weeks to say anything to you and all you wanted to do was die. Sans hands are pulling at this girls waist, to keep her from falling off him. You slam the door shut and run out into bar area.

Where is she, where, where…there! Caroline is hovering over her new leafy friend, but fun time has to end now. “Caroline!”

“Oh hey…what’s wrong?” Caroline must see it before you feel how ragged your breath it, how badly your face is burning.

“We need to leave.” You grab her hand and pull her towards the door. “Now.” On the off chance Sans did decide to speak to, you weren’t going to have it. Not now. No way. You can tell Caroline’s about to protest, but giving you another once over changes her mind. “Okay.”

You start to pull her through the door, but she quickly gives her new friend her phone number. Priorities.

Once safely in Caroline’s car, which you’re sure Sans had never seen before, she asks. “What happened?”

You pull at your face, pressing your skull into the headrest. You can feel tears pricking at your eyes, but you will absolutely not cry. “Sans is in there.”

She cocks her head. “That’s bad?”

You roll your head over slightly, so you can see Caroline out of the corner of your eye, “Sans with another girl.”

She slumps back against the seat. “That is bad.” She turns to look at you, expectantly. “Are you going to break up with him?”

“Uh, you can’t break up with someone you were never dating.” You cross your arms over your chest. The least you could do was try to not sound upset about all of this.

Caroline strains for a second, you can tell she’s wracking her brain. “Are…are you sure?”

Hand over your face, you blow out as much air from your lungs as you can. “Can we please just go home?” Caroline frowns, but nods. You’re just way too tired to deal with this shit.

And yet you have to, because you still have lab on Friday. Stay composed, act like it never happened you tell yourself as you walk through the front doors. As you past the front desk, the receptionist gives her normal welcome. You raise your hand to wave back, but your hand slowly falls as her features start to piece themselves together in your head. Her smile also begins to drop with realization.

The receptionist. That’s who was in the room with Sans. It’s confirmed as her face erupts red, and she immediately buries herself into the computer trying to pretend she didn’t see you. That’s fine with you, as you practically run past the desk. This is the worst.

And it’s just one disaster after another as Aria storms out from one of the classrooms, just about ready to rip someone’s head off. She searches the lobby for a second, before she sees you. You flinch when she B-lines it in your direction before hitting a hard halt. “What the fuck happened last night?”

“What?” You squeak out.

“As in why am I getting texts from all of your freaking roommates freaking out about Sans?” Hands slam to her hips. Of course Caroline told Mercedes and Dena. Of course they asked Aria since you refused to say anything. Fuck.

“I…he…it’s not…” You still don’t want to talk about it. If Sans decides he doesn’t want to even look at your anymore what can you do about it?

Aria gets tired of waiting for an actual answer through your stuttering and just pulls you toward the elevator. “I do not have time to deal with this. We are fixing this bull shit issue _now_.”

“Aria, no!” But you’re already in the elevator.

“What did he do?” She practically hisses.

“It’s not my problem.” You sigh. “But I went to Grillby’s yesterday with Caroline…found him in a room with the receptionist. He can do whatever he wants.” You lean back against the fake chrome siding, rubbing at your arms.

Aria takes a sharp inhale, but doesn’t say anything. You practically see her seething from the inside out.

“Aria, it’s like you said…”

“No it’s not.” Aria says through clenched teeth. “He doesn’t do shit the way he has in the past two weeks. And we are finding out why, now.” The elevator dings on your arrival, and Aria marches out. You have to jog to keep up with her.

The metal door slams into the wall of the lab, Aria having kicked it open like it weighed nothing. “Sans!” She screams, whipping her head around looking in every direction. Sans saunters out from the second floor staircase, looking annoyed. You think Sans is about to turn around and go back but he actually does walks down the stairs. You can feel yourself panic a little bit.

“What’s up?” Sans says, face deadpan. He doesn’t even acknowledge you standing behind Aria. It’s practically a stand-off between her and Sans, both waiting for the other to react.

“You want to tell me why you’re being a complete asshole?”

“Hey, I’m not the one who started it.” He shrugs. “Guess she didn’t tell you that, huh?”

Aria looks over her shoulder at you. You shake your head. “I don’t know what he’s talking about.” She rolls her eyes. “Great, I’m playing more telephone for you two? This is fucking pathetic. Sans, stop being cryptic and just fucking tell me.”

Sans sneers a little bit, clearly disliking Aria’s tone. “I’m not the one who decided to get pissed off and find the next dude at the bar to hook up with.”

Wait, what? “I never did that!” You push past Aria, so you’re the one standing in front of him.

Sans clacks teeth. “Yeah right. Fucking saw you on the terrace.”

Your give that a quick recap. He couldn’t have thought...but he did. “I wasn’t hooking up with anyone. I was talking. To Manny.” You try to keep your voice level, but it’s flooded with new found anger as you point at Aria, indicating she could probably get proof if needed. You realize your hands are starting to shake. “He calmed me down, and I went to look for you after to talk to you about what you fucking did!” Every other word is coming out screechy.

For the first time, he looks like he’s actually taking something in. You hear Aria breath out behind. “Shit, that’s true. Manny told me he talked to you on Friday.”

Sans features change from uninterested to slight horror. “You didn’t…but I saw…”

“You saw nothing! You just made a damn assumption! I don’t do things like that!” He put you through hell for that?! He wouldn’t speak to you for such a shitty reason!? Why wouldn’t he ever just talk to you!

“Sans. Did you start hooking up with other girls again to get back at Chara?” Aria almost says it to herself, but both of you for sure hear it. Sans looks away, lights in his eyes going dim, confirming it.

Aside from your own anger vibrating at your core, you could feel a secondary pressure. It was all too much. “You just think you’re so fucking smart!” You yell directly at him. “You think you know everything, and that you’re above asking! I can’t…I can’t be here! I can’t do this!”

Sans just stays where he is looking down. If there was anyway, you had apparently absorbed all of Aria’s previous anger and storm out of the lab. Aria follows for a second calling for you to stop, but instead you start running. You hightail it down the stairs, practically at full sprint. You’re out of the building in a hot minute, jamming yourself into your car. You can’t tell if anyone followed you. You don’t care.

It takes a few minutes of reckless driving to bring yourself down. You’d almost hit another car twice. But you couldn’t go back, but where could you go now? A heavy sob leaves your chest but you try to shake it off. No crying.

_I know where you can go. No one will find you there._

You don’t immediately respond to Chara. “I…I don’t know.” You’re not supposed to give in the Chara, no matter what the situation. You know that. You know what Frisk said, what everyone’s been saying. But you don’t know what else to do right now.

_Pull over into the parking lot in the next mile._

You do it. You’re not particularly far from school, but its good you stopped. Your vision is starting to blur out as fatigue hits you hard. You can see a bus stop down the road and a few local business lining the street. “Where?” You finally ask.

_Don’t worry Chara. I’ll take you there._

And everything goes black.

When you finally come to, you’re face down in fresh snow. As you pull yourself up, ever muscle in your body screams from soreness and from the cold. You’re only in your lab coat. You have no idea where you are until you look up.

You’re at the base of Mt. Ebott.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was a lot.  
> I need to take a chill pill or something. 
> 
> Get ready for more drama!!


	25. Deep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so happy so many of you liked the last chapter it made me soooo happy!
> 
> We still have a way to go, enjoy!

“Chara! Why are we here?”

Silence rings in your ears as you’re graced with no response.  

“Chara?”

Still nothing. The medication must have warn them down faster than they expected. In short, you completely lucked out this time.

You’re currently at the base of Mt. Ebott, alone, with no idea how you got there. Actually, you had an idea of how you got there, but that wasn’t the biggest issue at hand. The sun was starting to dip behind the top of the mountain and were severely underdressed, having left your winter clothes in your car. How long at you been out here? It was only early afternoon when you ran out of the medical sciences building. Fresh snow was starting to trickle down, threatening to erase the trail of footsteps leading down the mountain. As much as it hurt to try, you needed to start walking down.

You found your phone still neatly tucked into your pocket. You had to call for help.

So many missed calls. Aria must have called about 40 times, and there were also a number of calls from Papyrus, Undyne, and Alphys. And some from Sans. You instantly swipe away your missed calls, bringing up the dial screen.

 _“Chara?! Holy hell, where are you!? Are you okay?! We found your car abandoned and you weren’t picking up your phone!”_ Aria shouts into the phone, voice struck with an odd mixture of terror and relief. You have to pull the phone away from your ear as she shouts.

“I-I’m okay.” Oh, you’re colder than you thought, as your words come out in shivers. “I’m at Mt. Ebott.”

 _“You’re…what? How did you get all the way there?”_ Aria’s voice drops. _“Please don’t tell me…”_

You sigh, feeling ashamed. Dammit, you’d be tricked. You were lucky enough to regain consciousness before anything worse happened, you thought. “Yeah.” The moment of disgrace is short lived, as you keel over and start gagging.

 _“Chara?! Chara, what’s going on!?”_ Aria’s voice is mixed with the sound of your own vomiting. When you open your eyes, a grainy sob escapes you. The taste is horribly bitter tearing at the back of your throat with the consistency of tar. When you look down, there’s a pool of black and brown around your hands. Please don’t be blood.

“Aria, I need help!” There’s only so much you can take in 24 hours. Hot tears flow freely down your face as you cry into the phone on your hands and knees, freezing the cold.

 _“I know you don’t want this, but Sans and Papyrus are the closest to you right now. Just try to get close to road. And send me your location!”_ You can hear the strain in Aria’s voice, but you hang up and do as she says.

She’s right, you think as you trudge forward until you come up to an empty camping parking lot. You don’t want to see Sans at all. You push a pile of snow off a picnic table and huddle yourself up on the table top. You just sit there and cry, mostly because it’s giving you something to do besides shiver.

What had you done to deserve all of this? You never thought of yourself as a bad person. But everything about your life was a complete mess. What the hell did Chara want? You curl up tighter, trying to preserve your own body heat. The sun was almost gone and you were too afraid to check the time on your phone to see how long you’d been waiting.

A red sports car does something akin to hydroplaning in the snow road, but manages to stop before sustaining any damage. You can hear the door open, as you stand up to start walking towards Papyrus’ car. You watch Sans get out of the car and you guess that’s his version of running until he’s right in front of you. “Chara…” He breathes out, like it’s the most natural thing in the world. “Come on, lets get you out of here.”

When Sans reaches out, you pull back. “Don’t touch me.” Your voice cracks with shivers.

There’s a pain looked on his face, but he shakes it off. “We can talk about this later, now isn’t the time to be stubborn.” He tries again, but you shuffle around him, trying to walk yourself to the car.

“You have no right to say that to me.”

As much as you would like to have walked yourself all the way to the car, you’re in too bad of shape and you fall to the ground with a soft crunch. Too tired from crying, too sore from walking up and then down a snowy mountain, too cold from being underdressed. Sans picks you up without asking, walking toward the car. You try to thrash to get him to let go, but you don’t have enough energy to do any substantial damage.

Papyrus helps get you into the backseat, but you’re boarder line hysterical by the time they get you buckled in and wrapped up in a blanket. You sob in the back for maybe five minutes before you have nothing left and fall asleep.

When you wake up, you’re in a new strange place. Your eyes are taking longer than acceptable to focus, but at least this place is warm. You pull what feels like blanket around you as your vision builds up. You’re in someone’s room. It’s painted a matte light gray, and the comforter you’re under is a similar color in a darker shade. Nightstand, dresser, messy desk, Sans sitting at said desk.

Oh no. The first noise that comes out of you is a pained groan, which catches Sans’ attention. He’s sitting in a rolling chair which he swings around. He gets up. “Hey. How are you feeling?” He says quietly, moving closer to the bed.

“No! Leave me alone!” Your voice is horse and strained, as you scramble around to find something. You find a limp pillow and mustering up what little power you have, throw it at him. It hits him square in the face. “Get out!” Your voice is picking up a little momentum as you reach for whatever is object is around you.

“Chara, what are you, whoa!” Another pillow whizzes past Sans’ head as you clamor around, out of pillows. “I said get out!” You reach for a fist full of change on the nightstand and hurl them in his direction. They rain down on him, plinking off bones.

“Stop throwing things and listen to me! Fuck!” You threw something heavy which smashes against the wall, and hits the floor with a shattering noise. It may have been a flashlight but you aren’t sure. “Get out!” You wail again, your voice starting to crack.

“Fine, fine.” Sans backs up towards the door with his hands up. You’ve already got some figurine in your hand, ready to fire. “I’m leaving, don’t throw that. It’s Pap’s.” You open your fist, letting the toy fall into the bed, glaring with all your might. Sans gives you one last look before closing the door behind him.

You drop back onto the bed. Having a full blown temper tantrum is a lot of work. No wonder you’d rather be someone who would just rather avoid all this crap. Laying back and taking a deep breath, you study the ceiling.

You’re in Sans’ room. A few weeks ago this would have been far more exciting than you would want to admit. Now it was mostly insult to injury. The stupid bed smelled just like him and now you have no pillow. Why couldn’t they just leave you at your apartment doorstep or something?

There’s a soft knock on the door. “Go away.” You call. God, you sound horrible.

“It’s me…can I come in?” The voice is muffled through the door. It’s Aria.

After a few seconds, you decide. “Okay.” The door slowly creaks open as Aria slides in, closing the door behind her. “So.”

“So.” You echo, wrapping the blankets around you. Aria looks around the room, before picking up the broken flashlight. She grimaces, running her hand over the fresh dent in the wall. “Why did you let them take me here?” You ask, pushing your hair out of your face.

“Their house was the closest. We were really worried.” She answers bluntly, choosing to sit on the floor directly in front of you. “He wanted to apologize, you know.”

“I don’t care.” You huff, crossing your arms over your knees and burying your head into them. You can hear make a frustrated noise. You look away with a deep frown. You both know that’s not true.

“My entire life has gone from great to the worst I could imagine. And that’s without Sans. I know how I still feel. But I was so upset…when Chara offered a place to go, I just didn’t have the will power to say no.”  

“Wait,” Aria shifts so she’s sitting cross-legged. “Chara spoke to you again?”

You nod. “It’s happened a few times. It’s a side effect of the medicine. Alphys knows. They can’t take over on their own anymore I think. But I guess someone where inside, I just let them.” You’re feeling cold again.

Aria drags her hands over her face. “Oh god. This really just getting worse.”

Aria’s about to say something else but they’re a short rap at the door. “Tall and small human?”

“What’s up Papyrus?” Aria responds. You give her a worried look, but she presses a finger to her mouth so you can both hear him.

“I do not wish to interrupt since Chara is not well, but Sans has gone outside. He’s using the cigarettes again…”

“Fuck!” Aria throws her hands into the air. “I thought we were done that shit!” Aria starts to get up. You wrench your face. “Sans smokes?”

“Well he hasn’t for like 3 years, but sometime he does it when he’s really stressed out. It doesn’t cause the same problems it does for human, but it’s still not good for anyone. I’ll be right back.”

Aria leaves the room, grumbling about baby bones, and some actually obscenities. Papyrus stands in the doorway awkwardly, trying not to make eye contact with you.

“I am glad you are safe small human.” His voice is the most quiet you’ve ever heard it. You would rather he was shout like he normally does. “My brother has done some less than heroic things since we came to the surface, but I think he is very upset about what he has done, though I not exactly sure what. The great Papyrus wishes for you to please speak to him. I do not like to my brother sad. I do not want to see you sad.”

You give Papyrus a small smile. “I’m not sure there’s anything to talk about.”

You can tell he’s not satisfied with that answers. “Human determination is much stronger than monster determination. If you use it, I believe it is possible to make things better.” Papyrus walks out of sight, leaving you to your own devices.

You wondered if Papyrus actually knew more about the entirety of the situation than he let on. Either way, Papyrus is one hell of a brother. But is this something you even want to fix? Maybe once all of this is over, everything will just go back to way it was before.

It’s sound much less appealing that you hoped it would.

You hear the front door slam shut. Aria’s back upstairs, closing the door the Sans’ room. She drops herself back onto the floor, looking far beyond annoyed.

“I don’t get it.” You say, watching her grumble to herself.

She picks her head up from her chest. “Get what?”

“You and Sans. You seem to work a lot harder than he does.”

“Eh, that’s because I’ve actually been okay since starting my second year of medical school. It’s usually me that’s the problem.” Aria crosses her legs, looking pensive. “It’s just particularly bad for him right now.”

You look out the window for a second, and even though the blinds are closed you know it’s already night. “How did you guys even become friends? I know you met in the underground, but…”

Aria runs her hands over her face. “It’s kind of complicated.”

“Maybe if I understand why you’re friends with him, I can figure out how I feel too.”

That got her. She raps her finger on the floor, gears turning. She takes a deep breath through her nose. “You know what’s weird? I’ve never actually talked to anyone about the whole thing.” You scoot forward on the bed, so you can hear her better since her voice is fairly low now.

“This is going to sound so bad.” Aria rubs her hand over her mouth, almost in an attempt to pull the words out.

“You know how the other humans who fell were killed right? And that, hopefully, most of them joined with other humans after the barrier came down? Our souls and memories are one. Whatever happened down there is now part of me.”

You nod.

“Anyone who knows what happened just sort of assumed that was the work of the King, Asgore. Kept our souls locked up until he had seven. Most of the children fell to him, but not all of us.” Aria steals a quick glance at you, facial expression unchanging. She exhales loudly. You can feel your own heart rate picking up.

“I fell to someone else.”

Please don’t go where you think this is going. Please, please. “Who?”

“Sans.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's throw shit! Let's have a tantrum!  
> Let's make things terrible! 
> 
>  
> 
> You know what kind of loser draws draws their own fanart?  
> This one does!  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


	26. Bravery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my goodness, I made you guys feel such things about Sans and Chara and everything  
> I like it that you still told me you were enjoy it even though it's pretty frustrating haha

There’s a heavy silence hanging in the air. You’re in Sans’ room with Aria. She’s supposed to be telling you how they become friends.

Instead she just told you Sans caused a child’s death in the underground, causing their soul to be trapped. A soul that belongs to her. So in a roundabout way, Sans killed Aria.

“I don’t…” You can’t think of any words. How do you process something like that? Aria’s just picking at the carpet with a dark smile on her face.

“I don’t remember a time before falling. But when I did, the underground was really different than how it was when Frisk fell, or so I’ve been told. It wasn’t nearly as technologically advanced.”

Her voice hitches for a second, but she continues anyways. “Most of us who fall ended up in the ruins. Toriel tried to keep me from going further into the mountain, deeper in the underground and that Asgore would just take my soul. Either way I was trapped. I wasn’t much for being contained. I had to try.”

You know most monsters understand that Aria has two souls, but you wonder if Toriel remembers Aria from then. That one day, a child who died would show up with that soul. It’s a little dizzying to think about.

“I got attacked a lot. I got hurt a lot. I hurt a lot of monsters.” Aria clutches at her chest for a second. You mimic the motion, remember about your own LV. You don’t know if yours is real. Aria’s must be. You can tell she’s watching you take that in.

“There wasn’t too many chances for me to avoid fighting, plus that was just something I was good at. I think I was into boxing or something. The monsters who recognized me as a human were hell bent on getting me to Asgore. I thought they were just that. Monsters.”

Another long silence. You don’t blame her. You can barely kill a bug. And that soul was a child.

“Eventually,” Aria readjusts herself so she’s more comfortable against the wall. “I found myself in the Hotlands. That’s where I met Sans. He was little,” Aria makes a motion, showing you just how small. “close to that soul’s original age. Maybe nine or ten.”

“He was the only monster who didn’t try to attack me right off the bat.” You raise your eyebrow at that. Aria shakes her head and rolls her eyes. “It wasn’t because he’s lazy. He was…really different then. The lights in his eyes were a lot brighter. He got a lot more excited about things. But he was still a kid, and he got to do things he was great at. He worked with Alphys in the lab down there with some big shot royal science. I never got to meet him though. Sans said if that happened I would be dead in a second.”

Aria hisses through her teeth. “What kind of person makes little kids work in a lab?”

 “I was in the underground for a long time. Sans was all I had. And, really, I was all he had too. Not that I could remember what the other soul’s life was like before, but whatever makes a kid jump into a hole in a mountain can’t be good. So I have to assume Sans was the closest thing to a best friend I ever had. It felt that way, anyways.”

“I was a lot of fun, during that time.” Aria perks up a little bit. “I gave Sans a chance to actually act like a kid and not the tiny scientist he was expected to be, and Sans made it possible for me to actually live in the underground somewhat safely. It’s actually pretty cool down there when everyone isn’t trying to kill you. And I got to help take care of Papyrus when he was really little, but he doesn’t remember that.” Aria’s excitement quickly recoils. “It’s better that way.”

“Like I said though, I was never a fan of being contained. I found my way down into the lab once. You know how kids get. Sans told me to never go down there so of course I wanted to. But it was a mistake. I saw things I shouldn’t have. There were these terrible machines, doing…stuff to monsters. I don’t even know what it was, and I never asked. Not even now.”

Your chest burns for a second. It’s not you, but somehow you manage to push the feeling down.

“But worse was what happened to humans who fall. Alphys later made these container things to keep human souls alive for prolonged periods of time. But back then…they had to preserve the bodies to keep the souls. There were these long tall tubes with little bodies in them floating in liquid. You could see the glow of their souls being kept alive by who the hell knows what.”

“I had to get out of the underground. I was really upset that Sans had a hand in all that stuff, but I never blamed him for it. But I knew I needed to try to get out. I didn’t want to be a body in a tube. When I told Sans he completely freaked out. He said I was much safer just staying where I was, but I knew I wasn’t. I had been lucky up until then. It would only be a matter of time before I got caught anyways. So I left, despite how upset Sans was about it.”

Aria thumbs at some of the change strewn around the room, her mouth moving just enough for you tell she’s trying to think how to word whatever comes next. You nervously pull at the edges of your hair.

“It took a while, but I eventually made it to the captiol. I was going to try to approach Asgore myself. Which means I would have to fight and kill him to get out. That’s how it worked. But for a kid, I was an excellent fighter. I thought I could do it. I never got to find out.”

“Sans was waiting for me in the castle. I didn't know what he was doing there. Apparently he was some kind of judgement keeper then, even as a kid. He begged me to just go back to Hotland and that what I was doing would just get me killed, and the LV in my soul meant he needed to stop me i didn't. I said that would be better than being some type of freak experiment. I told him he really was a monster and that it was their fault i had any LV in the first place. I set him off with that.” Aria’s face wretched with what almost looks like shame. It’s gone in a second.

“You have to understand, Sans was still little then. His magic was poorly controlled, and I knew that. We tried to practice but monster kids just can’t always control themselves that way. He only meant to restrain me.”

Aria stays quiet for a long time. “You know how I crack my shoulders all the time?”

“Yeah.”

“I could never do it until I gained the second soul.”

There’s a full lump in your throat.

“Sans’ magic was too much for him. He ended up smashing me against a wall. He broke both of my shoulders simultaneously and crushed my chest. It’s the most painful thing I can ever remember, this life or the other. The second it happened, I knew I was done for. There was so much blood, god. My soul was already fading fast. He’d hit me too hard. He knew that. He ran over to me, pleading for me stay awake, stay alive, stay determined.”

“But it was too much. I begged him to just kill me.” Aria has her head in one hand, trying to keep her voice steady. “Just destroy my soul and don’t let Asgore have it. I remember screaming it at him, telling him that if was ever really my friend he would do this for me and end it. Being completely dead was better than the alternative.” She takes a deep breath. “But he didn’t…I was down there for such a long time. Fuck, we were so little." 

It’s another minute before Aria starts talking again. You’re already on the verge of tears yourself, but if she won’t cry about it neither will you.

“Frisk saved us. All of us. But a soul without a body is destined to die out. That’s when that soul found me. And you already know about that mess.” Aria sadly laughs. “Having two souls filled all the broken parts of mine, that was the deal. They only wanted one thing in return. They wanted Sans to suffer the same way they had.”

You’re completely bundled up in the blanket and you just want the story to be over, but you want to keep listening. You need to know.

“And it was totally doable back then. You remember how bad it was five years ago? Monsters were always getting attacked. No one would have even known. So I did everything I could to find him. But when I did…he knew who I was. Not this version of me, but the actual soul.” Aria ushers to her entirety. “He told me I had every right to hate him and want him dead. And he equally believed he didn’t have the right to be alive. But he was because he had others to take care of. He was so different from how I remembered.”

It’s so quiet in the room you can hear you own breathing.

“He said what he had done to me what the biggest regret he’d ever have. And from then on he did whatever he could to make sure he never had to do that to someone he cared about ever again. He quit working with the royal scientist, taking little Papyrus with him. That scientist apparently disappeared a few years after he left. He did whatever he could to stay out of the way of humans and whenever he had to do his judgment thing, unless they proved to be nothing but destruction, he always let them through.”

Aria gives you a quick glance. Right. Chara. Complete destruction. You hope those are memories you never see. 

“He then said, if it wasn’t for Frisk, he wouldn’t mind if I was the one who killed him right then and there after everything that happened. But he wanted to be on the surface. He said that he knew my soul, my original soul that belongs to me needed much more than filled holes to be fixed. The same went for him. Sans said in exchange for showing him mercy, we would work to fix my soul.”

“And I agreed. And believe me, I made Sans work for it. I was a fucking mess.”

Aria gives you the first genuine smile in the entire time she’s taking.

“In reality, the part of my soul from the underground never wanted to kill Sans. They were just so hurt. Completely betrayed. But he only did what he knew. I really just wanted to be friends again. That doesn’t make it okay, but dwelling on it forever won’t fix the issue.” Aria ducks her head low. “Sound a little familiar?”

You stare down at the bed. “In theory I guess?” You shake your head. “He didn’t physically kill me.” Your voice is low. “But what he did to me he did it on purpose. Like literally to get back at me for something I never even did.”

Aria rakes the back of her head. “In the long run, I’m partially at fault for that. When everything went down with Toriel, I let Sans think it was okay to do…eh…stuff like he did to make himself feel better. I’m not justifying it at all though. If he wants to fix this he’s going to have to do it himself. And really I should be the last person endorsing this.”

“Aria,” You put one hand to your face dragging it down. “You’re both fucking crazy.”

Strained, weak laughter fills the room.

Another knock graces the door. “Humans?”

“Yeah?” Aria responds, laying back against the wall.

“I believe the situation has taken a turn for the worst. I require your assistance once again.”

Aria walks over to open the door. “Pap, what’s wrong now?”

“Sans…is lost” Is all he says.

Aria make a very audible gasp. “Fucking hell! Can I not get a fucking break today?” Aria pushes past Papyrus, clearly much more riled up than when it was the smoking.

You pull it together long enough to slide off the bed, taking the comforter with you. “Papyrus, what’s going on?” He rubs at the back of his head as Aria sprints down the stairs. “Sans cannot control his magic very well when he is lost. He is mostly harmless, but it is still scary.” Papyrus gives you a quick glance. “Not that I, PAPYRUS THE GREAT, am fearful in any way for my brother!” With that he shoots down the stairs following Aria.

You wonder if you should just stay up here, but there’s a huge crash from downstairs that makes you too curious. Obviously from what they were talking about it Sans wasn’t physically lost, but this didn’t sound good either.

You scuttle down the stairs and from the kitchen when something clamors across the floor as if it had been rolled from the opening, weakly hitting the floor with a clank. It’s a pan, coated with blue magic but it almost looks like the magic is melting. You bend down to pick it up, but it’s too hot to touch almost burning your hand. You’ll leave it where it is.

You venture toward the kitchen, keeping yourself mostly behind the doorframe. Papyrus is there, looking concerned, urging everyone to be safe. Aria’s back is to you, but there’s some type of glow in front of her. Sans is in the corner, blue magic with yellow shocks is dripping out from his eye socket with weak smoke like a dying fire seeping from it, but there’s no indication of his actual eyes. It’s just empty magic.

When Aria side steps to avoid an entire chair thrown at her, you see it. Her soul. If yours wasn’t bathed in a hellish black you say they looked pretty similar. It’s larger than yours, still crystal like, mostly yellow with patches of orange emitting deep orange swirls around it.

“Sans, come on! Do you really want to do this?” He absently hurls another chair toward her but it’s such a poor, weak throw it just clatters to the floor, no damage done. Papyrus was right, this was almost pathetic to watch.

Despite this, you decide that Aria is somewhere between the bravest person or the stupidest. She literally just told you Sans killed her with his magic. And now she’s just sauntering through it and taunting him?

“Aww, you that upset over Chara? I would be, you fucked up dude.” Sans raises his hand, but all it does is knock a glass of a table. It doesn’t even break.

“What was that? You’re just digging yourself further in the hole, you know. She’s not even going to want be in the same room as you if you keep fucking up.” You realize Aria’s taunting him because it’s making his magic weaker. You’re not particular pleased she’s using you as material though.

Aria lets out a dramatic sigh. “You know how much this sucks for the both of us. Do you really want that?” She says nonchalantly, stepping over the chair. The table cloth is ripped from the table, but just flutters to the floor, as Sans takes shallow, listless breathes. Aria shrugs. “Guess it’s going to be the hard way.”

 “You ready Papyrus?” Aria takes a quick look over her shoulder, as she rolls up one of her sleeves, but keeps her attention focused on Sans.

“The Great Papyrus is always ready!” He announces.

“Good.” There’s a split second where you’re not entirely sure what happens, but with a quick look around the kitchen Aria’s dead in front of Sans, arm pulled back. She manages to jam the majority of her hand inside of Sans’ eye socket, opposite to the one overflowing with magic. You flinch when it happens, because who the hell wouldn’t? Sans freezes up, and when she pulls her hand back out he collapses to the floor. Aria’s running toward Papyrus, trying to hold back a scream. Blue magic engulfs her hand which looks like it’s spasming out.

“Get it off! Get it off!” She pounds her feet on the floor as Papyrus dissipates the electric blue magic. She drops to her knees, still clutching her hand. “Fuck, I forgot how much that hurts.” She whines.

“What just happened!?” You shout. Only Papyrus and Aria look up at you. Sans is apparently out cold.

“Oh. You see all that?” Aria cocks her head, hand pressed tightly to her chest. You see how red it is. You nod in response.

“Basically that was a monster panic attack. Monsters call it ‘being lost’. It’s similar in build up to a humans, but you know, magic and shit. If they happen to be a strong monster you just need to cut off their magic or you can wait it out. I’m not that patient. Sans’ magic normally comes from his eye, but it’s more centralized when he’s like that. So you just jab your hand in there. It’s like an off button.”

“Does that always work all the time?” You crane your head in the kitchen further. 

“No, he just gets really pissed off if you do it to him while he’s normal. I know, I’ve tried.” She laughs, using only her feet to stand up. “Damn, that hasn’t happened in such a long time.”

Papyrus is already riffling through the freezer, dumping ice into a plastic container. He places it on the now bare breakfast table. Aria bounds over, shoving her entire hand into it. This clearly wasn’t the first time this has even happened. Your stomach ties in knots. What the hell did you get yourself into?

Aria and Papyrus sit at the table, looking exhausted. You’re tired too so you decide to join them since you’ll fit in anyways.

After about 10 minutes Sans starts to come too. You feel a little bad just having left him on the floor, but Aria said it was better to not move him. It’s better that he figures out what happened on his own. Besides, he deserved to stay on the floor right now.

Sans wakes up about 15 minutes later. “What the fuck?”

“Morning, asshole. Have fun with your little temper tantrum?” Aria says, swirling her hand around half melted ice. Papyrus gets out his chair to help Sans up. Sans presses at his skull, the way someone does when they have a terrible migraine. It’s quiet for a while as Sans observes the terrible state of disarray the kitchen is in, plus everyone’s current state. He stares at you longer than you’re ready for, but it’s when he sees Aria is when realization hits his face.

“Fuck.”

“Fuck is right.” She replied smugly, with a touch of annoyance.

“And you saw this?” Sans points to you, and then waves his hand around indicating he means what happened in the kitchen.

You nod, making sure not to make eye contact.

Aria groans dramatically. “Between the two of you, you’re going to put me in an early grave.” She takes her hand out of the container and dries it on her sweater.

“Oh!” Papyrus shakes the entire table. “Then you would also be a skeleton! That is an excellent outcome!”

Aria gives half a snarl at the comment. But you start laughing. You know everyone must be looking at you like you’re insane, but soon you’re joined by everyone else.

Nothing was better. Nothing had been fixed. You’re still incredibly angry with Sans, don’t know how to deal with your literal internal demon, and you can barely remember what normal feels like.

But everyone’s alive.

So this is okay for now.

But that doesn’t mean you’re looking forward to the days ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So let me explain 'being lost' really quickly because this chapter was hella long and I didn't get to do that. Basically it's a similar effect to a panic attack, but instead of hitting a true flight or fight response that happens in humans I made the assumption that monsters hit a primal state of defense. That's because a panic attack is really just a natural defense mechanism gone haywire. So 'being lost' refers to the state of losing themselves to raw magic that is suppose to be protective. 'Cutting off the source of magic' is the equivalent to someone taking a fast activating sedative, which cuts off the autonomic response in a person. But remember to be nice to real people when this happen!  
> I just made it more dramatic because I can. 
> 
> Thanks for spending this moment with me trying to apply medical science to cartoon skeletons. Enjoy the rest of your day.
> 
> Edit: It seems I wrote it a little too vague, but Aria's actual soul is yellow and obtained the orange soul.


	27. Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My comeback skills are getting sharp. 
> 
> Sharp as a knife?

You’re buried in your blanket and wake up to shouting. You’d had yet another nightmare and now there was screaming in real life. Awesome.

Maybe this was your own nightmare, hopefully spurred by Aria’s story. But it seemed so life-like if not a bit hazy, which made you think it probably wasn’t you. You were trapped some type of liquid in a glass case. There were monsters you’ve never seen speaking and pointing at you. But the rest is a blur.

It’s almost 11 AM on a Sunday. You tried your hardest to get up a few hours earlier, even getting as far as being totally dressed and ready to go, but you never made it past your bed. Last semester you would have been completely appalled with yourself but these days you can barely keep yourself awake, with good reason it turns out.

Your train of thought is interrupted. “What are you doing here?” It’s Dena, she sounds mad, you think as you drag yourself out into the living room. You quickly made yourself look remotely presentable.

“Can I just talk to her for a second? Dena, come on.” You stop yourself before you leave the little hallways where the bedrooms are. Why the hell is Sans here?

“Don’t ‘Dena’ me! Do you really think Chara wants to talk to you? You’re the worst!” She starts to push the door closed, but you can hear it clack up against Sans hands. “If she doesn’t want to talk to me she can tell me herself.”

“Dena, stop.” You walk out from around the corner. You can see she’s in the midst of standing her ground, so her eyes widen with confusion. You shake your head walking up to them. “I’ll listen to what you have to say.” You direct at Sans. Actually, they both look pretty shocked.

Dena glances between the two of you. “Are you sure?”

You shrug. “No.” You walk past Sans, out in the cold. “But it’s what a decent person would do.” You shoot him an icy look, and he’s already starting to sweat.

You’re lucky, you think, since it’s not freezing out today and you hadn’t bothered to put on a serious coat. You trot down the stairwell choosing to sit on the second to last stair before the landing between the first and second floor. Far enough so nosy roommates can’t listen. You prop your head up in your hands.

You hear your front door shut and foot steps behind you. “Can I sit?”

“No.” You point to the landing. “You can stand.”

Sans sighs. “Yeah.” He leans against the guardrail, arms crossed over himself.

“You wanted to talk.” You say flatly. You’re glad you’re still groggy, it’s adding to the effect. “So talk.”

Sans pulls the back of his neck, looking unsure of how to proceed with your apparent uninterested attitude. “Listen, I’m really sorry. About everything, all of it. This was completely my fault.”

“Yeah.” You reply. “It is your fault.”

“Ouch.”

You’re starting to feel a little shaky, but you know you’re finally the one with leverage. You’ve never been in this position with Sans before, ever. If you weren’t still angry, you might think it was fun.

“List everything you’re sorry for.” You don’t look away. Don’t be a pacifist, you tell yourself. He looks at you with disbelief. “Seriously?”

“Well.” You start to push up off your knees. “I guess if you’re not interested in talking I’ll just go back inside.”

“Shit, no. Stay there.” He starts to take a step forward. “Dammit.”

You drop back down, waiting for his response while trying not to look pleased with yourself. “I’m sorry that I assumed you were hooking up with anyone just because it was something I would do. I’m sorry I did do that.” He takes a deep breath.

“I’m sorry I wouldn’t talk to you or hear you out. I’m sorry that everyone else got dragged into it. I’m sorry that you ended up on the side of a fucking mountain. Sorry losing my damn mind like an asshole…why did you agree to talk me again?”

You shrug. “What about the thing with the lab?”

“That I’m not sorry about.” There’s conviction in that answer, and you’re not sure how you feel about that. There’s a sad laugh that follows up on that. “But I guess I’m would be the most sorry for myself if it turned out I actually did completely fuck this up.”

You’re sorry about that too, even though you’re unsure of what ‘this’ was supposed to be.  You try to rub some of the cold out of your arms, peeking out through the stair railings. There’s a few people milling around the parking lot, but that’s it.

“Uh, Chara?” You don’t look up but you figure Sans is starting to get a little anxious since you haven’t said anything for a while.

“Damn. I’ll I’ve been doing is making everything worse. And I guess those meds aren’t working. A lot of use I am.” He says, probably just to fill the silence.

You pick your head up. “It works, mostly. But Chara can talk to me sometimes because of it. It’s harder to tell them no when they can make an argument.”

“They started talking to you again?” Sans puts all his weight back on his own feet. You grit your teeth a little bit. “Yeah, almost two weeks ago. If you actually had the decency to speak to me while I was home maybe you would have known that.” You stand up and start walking toward the stairs.

Sans wraps his hand around your wrist once you reach the second floor, having caught up to you. “I said I was sorry for that, for everything. I was being fucking stupid. What else do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know, Sans!” You shout. “I don’t know what I want!” You rip your hand out from his hold. “Why do you even care? It’s one-and-done right? And we can’t even do that! That’s too much work, right?”

“Of course it’s too much fucking work.” You turn back on you heel to face him, completely flabbergasted. Yeah, that’s exactly what everyone wants to hear. That they’re too much work.

“But here I am. At your apartment, taking shit from your roommates, making a fucking ass out of myself. And yeah, maybe I did some stupid shit but I thought you were fucking finished with me.” Sans’s tone in angry, but its directed at nowhere in particular. He jams his hands into his pocket, pulling at the fabric.  

“And I didn’t do it because I was mad at you. It’s not like I knew you would be at Grillby’s at all on a freakin’ Thursday. I didn’t deny what Aria said mostly because in some way it was true, but mostly in that split second I thought you really should be done with me. Clearly didn’t think one through.”

“Yeah, right. That’s pretty damn convenient.” You growl. While you think it is a little strange he’s going so far out of his way for this, you also don’t want to be tricked for the second time in two days.

“Fuck, do you think I would have done any of that if I didn’t…if I didn’t think getting over you would be harder than getting over Toriel?”

What?

“What?” Your eyes must be completely bugling out of your head.

Sans takes a step back, hand over the bottom half of his face. It’s drenched in blue.

You slowly and carefully take a few steps forward until you just a few feet away from Sans. “What did you say?”

He doesn’t move, keeping his eyes down and his hand over his mouth.

“Sans!” You grab the lapels in a jacket in way even more than you were prepared for. “What does that mean?” You shake at his jacket but he’s too sturdy and doesn’t even budge.

“Trying _rattle some bones_?” He says quietly. You guess he just can’t help himself.

“No jokes!” You shake harder but it still does nothing. “Just tell me!”

“Fine. I like you…a lot. More than _I_ thought I did.”

You just stare at him. Oh. He finally turns his head back toward you, eyes dim. You’re so close to him this way and you realize you’re breathing in very hard. There’s a very real second where you think he might actually kiss you.

It hits you that if he tried you wouldn’t stop him.

You shove back at him with your head down. Really, you just shove yourself away since he still doesn’t move from your force. Dammit, you know your face is getting red and heated. This shouldn’t be happening. What the hell is wrong with you?

“Happy now?” Sans grumbles, letting his hands hit his sides.  

“No, I’m not happy!” You press your hands to your face just for a second. “You couldn’t have told me that before? Maybe avoided all of this!” You just kind of motion to the space in between the both of you.

Sans just watches you have your moment. “It’s not like I knew it was like that. Besides, not like you said anything either.”

“What?!” Was he being serious? “Really? Because the constant blushing, inability to form functional sentences and oh, I don’t know, willfully hooking up with a known serial…I don’t even know what the hell you’re supposed to be!”  

“I didn’t say I didn’t know. Just that you never said it.”

You let yourself make an actual noise of frustration as you pace the few steps you can in the area between your front door and the stairs.

 “And if you’re wondering, I like that about you too.”

“Sans?” You annunciate his name so it’s perfectly clear. He seems a little taken aback by the way you said it. “Yeah?”

“Shut up.” You lean back against the concrete wall, with your arms over your face, if only to make sure he can’t see that you’re smiling just a little bit. You mentally chastise yourself for continually being so damn stupid.

Sans comes up next to you, so you make sure to keep your hands over your face. “If I shut up, would you forgive me?”

You drop your arms, smile now turned smirk. “That’s the best joke you’ve ever told.” You follow it up with what you hopes looks like a scowl but you can’t trust your own expressions right now. “Do you really think this is all you’d have to do? You think I’d just believe whatever you would tell me right now?”

“No, but a skeleton can hope, right?”

There’s a bang that comes from your front door, making you both jump.

“The fuck was that?” Sans’ confusion is etched into his face as he eyes the door.

“It’s just the girls. They can’t hear, we’re too far from the door. One of them probably fell over.” Probably Caroline, you think. She has a tendency to get squished between Dena and Mercedes, since they’re both fairly taller than her.

“Wait, your roommates are eavesdropping on us? And you’re not mad about that?” Sans gestures toward the door, face unreadable. You can’t tell if he’s being serious or not.

You narrow your eyes. “We all do it to each other, it’s not a big deal. We’re up front about our intensions.”

Sans bites down on his grin. “Damn, you sure you’re not a boxer because those are some _serious jabs_.”

Press your mouth together to keep yourself from smiling. You are angry at Sans. It’s annoying that you have to keep reminding yourself of that. You’re going to give him hell and you won’t be letting him off easy or just taking whatever story he tries to feed you in any way, shape, or form

No matter how much you want to.

“So you’ve been having conversations with the other Chara?” Sans runs a hand over the back of his head. “We should tell Alphys, huh?”

“She already knows about it. She called me yesterday and going to change the formula for the drug. Turns out she didn’t realize just how similar our genetics are.” That’s why you’ve been insanely tired the last few weeks. Since the drug was made the subdue the other Chara, it had a similar action on you since you strong share DNA. When you look over at Sans, you can tell he’s unhappy about that. Guess he’s just used to knowing things first. Too bad.

There’s a long stretch of empty silence.

“I’m going inside.” You say bluntly, pushing yourself off the wall, headed towards the door. You’re forced to stop when Sans’s hand catches yours. You don’t turn around.

“I really am sorry, okay?” 

You pull your hand out of his grasp, and nod quickly, but enough so he can see it. “I’ll see you later.” You duck back into your apartment.

You close the door behind you with a soft click. You’re half expecting to be bombarded the second you walk in the door, but your roommates are the kitchen, getting ice for Caroline’s head. You called it.

“So?!” Dena flails her arms out a few seconds of hard silence, clear missing Caroline but almost knocking Mercedes in the face. She manages to dodge.

You makes sure you’re against the door before you slide down and rather than give an actual response you just opt to scream into your hands and bang your feet against the floor in frustration.

“Chara, what happened?” Mercedes asks while putting ice into a baggy. Dena walks over to where you are and sits criss-cross in front of you, but says nothing.

“I just…and then he…but…I don’t know…” You bring your head into your hands, shaking it.

“I hate to tell you this but that was the exact opposite of what we asked.” Dena says softly, giving you a pat on the head. She shifts around making herself comfortable. “Okay, let me ask you this; are you still angry at Sans?”

You nod, not bothering to bringing your head up from out of your hands.

“Did he say anything that changed your mind about anything?”

That one you aren’t sure how to answer that one. If what he said was true, does that make what happened any more forgivable? You don’t know. You just sort of whine in response.

“Well, do you still like him?”

It’s a long time before you finally nod.

There’s a roommate pow wow that occurs over the next two hours where you tell them mostly everything that’s happened over the last few weeks, leaving out specifically sensitive information, which you have to get creative with. Maybe an outside opinion is what you need since your head is all over the place.

“I have no idea what I would do.” Dena says, sounding somewhat bewildered. Mercedes echos her sentiment. “Me either.”

Good to know you aren’t the only clueless one.

Caroline, on the other hand, has a solution. “I would just sleep with him.” 

Dena sputters out a laugh, while Mercedes asks the all-important question. “Uh, why? Isn’t that the opposite of what she should do?”

“Because sometimes what you think is ‘like’ is just sexual tension. Maybe it’s just that for everyone involved.” Caroline crosses her arms looking quite proud of herself.

Dena reaches over and traps her head and part of her torso in some form of a hug. “Guys, she’s ascending a new plane of Caroline-ness.” Caroline struggles to free herself to no avail. “I hate all of you. You’re just mad…” She pops her head out from Dena’s grasp. “That I’m right!”

“Okay,” You roll your eyes. If that was actually the issue, Sans wouldn’t have even bothered with you at all. “Say I do that. What happens if either of us actually does like the other? The what?”

Caroline gives you a blank stare. “Oh. Then I don’t know.”

There’s an eruption of laughter. “You guys are useless!” You stand up, laugher still in your words as you trudge off to your room.

Behind your own door, it’s not so funny anymore. You walk over to your closet, pulling Sans’ jacket out from the corner behind your shoe rack where you had shoved it on Thursday so you didn’t have to see it. The closet seems like a neutral place, so you sit there like the jacket is to give you an answer to all your problems.

Shocker, it doesn’t.

Angry you can deal with. Upset, hurt, those are solid emotions that are easy to convey.

Whatever this was, it making things much harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Caroline tries real hard. 
> 
> I hope you guys are okay with all these super conversational heavy chapters, there were just some issues to try and fix.  
> The alternative was to have Aria and Chara drag Sans for 2,700 words. Which may have worked anyways. 
> 
> OH WELL. On and forward!


	28. Mettaton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NO ONE TOLD ME METTATON WAS SO MUCH FUN TO WRITE  
> I should have done that ages ago

Stupid Caroline.

You just keep repeating that over and over again to yourself as you stand idly in front of the metal plated doors to the lab. It wasn’t really helping you at all. If anything it was getting you more riled up, more confused. No matter how much logic you tried to use to counteract it, what Caroline had said yesterday was still rolling around in your head. You bang your fist against the door, hoping to drown the sound of the voice in your head.  

“Darling, I’m all for a good hissy fit but maybe not in front of doors, hmm?” A long metallic arm raps the door from over your head.

You lean back to get a better look at this visitor. “Mettaton?”

“The one and only, of course.” He says, continuing his initial action and pushing the door open with minimal effort. He uses his other hand to usher you in. You quickly oblige.

“It’s nice to see you again. What are you doing here?” You were slightly implying that it would be surprising to see Mettaton at Alphys’ lab.

“You too, darling, naturally. Alphys asked me to lend a hand with some trial something or other. I do her quite a bit, you know.” Mettaton runs his hands over one of the lab tables, as he leads you toward Alphys’ office. Clearly he’s been here before. “She’ll be making some upgrades to my voice range. I need to be able to hit those high notes, people have such a great expectations of me.”

Alphys rounds the corner from the back of the lab with Sans, both holding a stacks of papers and clipboards. Sans slows his pace when he sees Mettaton, but picks it back up when he falls too far behind Alphys.  Or maybe it was you? You fidget with that thought.

“M-Mettaton, good! Everyone is h-here then? The first p-participants will be here soon. Sans and Chara, you’ll both b-be in the first room and r-rotate in and out. I’ll be doing the trials myself in the other room b-but Mettaton will be there t-too. Just in case anyone has a s-serious reaction, that way those of us w-who aren’t so good with magic are o-okay.” She flushes a little. “And don’t w-worry. The injector is j-just a pin-prick so it’s easy.” Alphys must have seen the face you made. You’d never injected anyone besides yourself and too be fair, you weren’t very good at it.

You were a little anxious when you walked into the now finished mini clinic in the back. Much less creepy, much more professional. You cranked open the nob to the door with a big bronze one on it. It looks like any doctor’s examination room, patient bed on the far wall, cabinets with a sink and an insanely large bottle of hand sanitizer. It is a little small though.

You flip through the research prompt, telling yourself the next time Alphys makes one of these, you’ll edit it for her. Grammar must the only thing she’s not stellar at.

“You excited?” Sans hangs back, drumming his fingers on the plastic-like fabric of the patient bed.

“Mostly nervous." You try your best not to make direct eye contact. You really were going to kill Caroline, putting stupid ideas in your head. "This is the one thing I haven’t messed up yet, and I’d like to keep it that way.” You rock your head from side to side.

“Now what could Chara ever ruin?” Mettaton hovers near the door frame with his arms crossed, giving a dramatic flip to his hair. “I certainly don’t believe that.”

“Why I have an excellent idea, Sans, be a dear and take the first volunteer.” Mettaton doesn’t even wait for Sans’ response, which was clearly to protest as he takes all of three steps across the small room. “Chara can keep my wonderful self company.” With both hands on your shoulders, Mettaton practically pushes you out of the room.

Alphys walks into the hallway with two college aged monsters, showing one to each room. Time to start, you suppose.

One of Alphys’ office guest chairs is the hallway, next to a lab stool. The other stool is clear on the other side, like it had been kicked down there. There are times to ask and there are times to not. You decide not to.

You take the stool and roll over to where Mettaton looks far too comfortable in the plush seat. “Do you really think anything bad will happen?” As much as your trust in Alphys’ ability you’ve had first-hand experience with some of this stuff, and you know to be a little wary.

“I highly doubt it. When she rushes, maybe there’s need to worry. I’m just here because she’s such a worrier herself. It’s precious.” Is Mettaton checking his reflection in his nails?

“Speaking of precious, Alphys and Undyne seem to believe you and…” Metatton points toward the door, a mischievous look cranking at the bolts on his face. “Yes, no?”

“That would be a no.” You say flatly. Mettaton nods like he expected that answer. “That is what I told them. They’re adorable but they just feed each other’s…odd interests. Not that it would be a possibility. It is Sans, after it’s all said and done.”

You’re not exactly sure what Mettaton is implying, but you’re more worried about how many people actually have figured out there was something going on between you and Sans. You don’t get a chance to ask about it because the first participant is done.

They’re a devilish looking monster and while you didn’t pay much mind to they looked like when they first walked in, they now have an obvious pep in their step. “Hang around the building for another hour or so. Let us know if you start feeling weird, got that kid?” Sans points to him to the exit.

“Alphys not done yet?” He mumbles tossing the now empty clipboard back into the examination room. It bounces off the table and clatters to the floor. He groans as he goes to pick it up from the floor.

“That’s quite interesting.” Mettaton hum, re-crossing his legs so that he’s dramatically leaning on the chair.

You study Mettaton for a second. “What is?” Your voice is a little suspicious.

“Sans, naturally.” He raises a perfectly manicured eyebrow. What a time to live in, where robots are prettier than everyone else, you sigh to yourself. “He usually makes such an attempt to see like nothing is an effort. Ironic, hm? But he’s more of a mess than he normally is, don’t you think?”

You glance into the room, watching Sans reorganize the papers on the counter. You didn’t really think Sans was acting that differently from normal, bar his lack of his normal excessive use of puns in everyday conversation. Even yesterday he still had his usual demeanor, despite…what happened. He’s just being more careless than normal, you think.

“I should really be taking advantage of such a situation. He’s just so distracted, maybe he won’t even notice Papyrus is with me.” Mettaton purrs.

“Papyrus?!” You blurt out. There was no way Mettaton was serious about that. It couldn’t be the same Papyrus that could burn spaghetti in a pot, or gave Mercedes ‘monster training’, or tried to build a snow fort taller than himself, got stuck under it and cried when it fell apart. There was no way.

“What about Papyrus?” Sans walks out of the room, starring daggers at Mettaton. “Absolutely nothing, Sans.”

Mettaton is saved when Alyphs walks out with a much sicker looking monster. “The n-nausea should die d-down in an hour or so? Does everything e-else feel okay?” The little mouse monster nods, holding back a hiccup. “Besides this,” They say in a teeny voice. “I don’t feel bad at all!”

Mettaton rises from his chair, offering it to the little monster. “Why don’t you wait here with us until you feel better, darling?” They starting squealing past their noxious state. “Mettaton?!” Sans glares hard as the little monster takes the seat, pleased as punch to be there.

You realize Mettaton had duel reasons to invite the heavily coated mouse to sit. Sans can’t do anything with a witness.

Running the participant trials isn’t has nerve wracking as you thought it would be. Your first participant is a very sweet humanoid monster except she’s like 80% slime. You get her health information and wait around for 15 minutes after the tiny finger prick is given. It almost seems like the trial drug is making her more open and enthusiastic and you talk together, waiting for the time to be done and jotting down how she feels as time progresses.

The rest of the day goes in a similar pattern, and no one was too worse for the wear after it was said and done. While it was fun to run the experiment, you would still much rather be behind the scenes making substances rather than give them.

Alphys takes Mettaton into her office while Sans hangs back to make sure everything was filled out properly. Alphys tell you to stick around for a few minutes until after Mettaton leaves.

“Aria?” You questions when you walk into the front of the lab. She’s sitting on top of one of the lab tables texting. “What are you doing in here?”

“You got me.” She finishes her text and shoves it into the pocket. “Alphys texted me a little while ago and said she needed some help with something, though I’m not she what I could help her with. And why is Mettaton here?”

“He said Alphys was going to upgrade him?” Which still honestly makes no sense to you.

Aria pulls her legs up onto the table and crosses them. “I should have guessed. It’s been a while though.” Aria laughs when she sees your face. “Dude, Alphys made Mettaton’s body. Why do you think he hangs out with us when he’s got a break from his oh so self-indulgent tour?”

“Self-indulgent? Aria, song bird, I do it for the fans.” Mettaton saunters out from Alphys’ office looking pleased. She apparently did a good job. “And I see you’ve dressed for the occasion.” He said smugly. Aria pulls at her oversized hoodie and scrub pants.

“Just trying to look the part. And don’t call me that.” Aria jumps off the table top, mimicking Mettaton’s pose, hips jutted to one side hands firmly planted on them. Mettaton rolls the one eye that isn’t blocked by a layer of hair.

“Anyways, Chara dear, if you’re ever interested in seeing what class feels like have Alphys get in touch with me. I’ll have my people call your people.” Mettaton says as he walks past Aria. She sticks her tongue out at him.

“I’ll keep that in mind, thank you.” You say, half grinning. You probably wouldn’t take him up on that offer. And you don’t even have ‘people’.

“Chao, darlings.” Mettaton struts out of the lab without a second glance back. You wonder how tall you would be if you could walk in heels that high.

Alphys scuttles out from her office, holding a Styrofoam case in her claw. You sigh, thinking that’s probably for you. “Is e-everyone here? Where’s Sans?”

“Here.” Sans practically pops up behind Alphys, making her jump. “Sorry, did I _spook_ you?”

You cover your mouth to block the unattractive snort you make. You can see Aria giving you non-verbal sass and Sans looks way too pleased with himself for the position he’s in. You huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Oh, yes, v-very funny Sans.” Alphys adjusts her glasses. “Since everyone is h-here, this will be Ch-chara’s new medication, but not for a few m-more days, it’s n-not done yet. It’s a s-seems like it m-may be stronger and I w-would rather Chara not be alone since the d-drug has an effect over three d-days.” Alphys fumbles with the case before placing it on the table top.

“Three day?! It’s got a half-life of three days?” Aria face twists into horror. “Alphys, what the hell is in that stuff?”

Alphys kicks at the floor. “I w-would rather not say.”

That’s absolutely terrifying considering the circumstances. “Uh, I don’t think I want to do that.” You say quickly.

“I r-really do think this w-will completely s-stop the other Chara though!” Alphys quips. “I think if s-someone w-watches you for the first day and your o-okay we can keep you on t-this instead.”

“I don’t know Alphys.” Sans leans over to open the case, but seems like they’re really nothing of interest inside. “She’s already been having trouble with this stuff.”

Aria stands right next to you while Sans and Alphys talk about the pros and cons. “Looks like she got invested in making this happen. It won’t be that bad right?” She whispers.

You click your tongue against your teeth. “You’re only saying that because you’re not the one taking it.”

“Well it could work.” She says half-heartedly. “Hey Alphys, if Chara says she’ll take it I’ll watch her. You said it won’t be bad right?”

You take a second to think about it. If it does work then maybe all the issues you’re having now, the nightmare memories, Chara actually speaking to you would be over. It can’t fix all your problems though.

“Fine. I’ll try it. But if it doesn’t work I’m not doing any more new medications.” You cut your hand across the air. You have to draw the line somewhere.

Besides, what’s the worst that could happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. Bad things. Yep.


	29. Dizzy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A sleep deprived Aria is an angry Aria. 
> 
>  
> 
> And just as a disclaimer everyone knows what's going on but there is indication of non-consent. This has been a PSA

“Alphys!” Aria practically screams as she drags you through the lab Friday morning a week and half after you started running trials and a day and a half after you’ve taking Alphys new solution to your little demon problem.

You cover your ears when she yells again, giggling when it echos back. You make the choice that sitting is better than being dragged, and the middle of the floor in the lab is a good spot.

“Aria? What’s w-wrong?” Alphys rushes down from the second floor. “Is e-everything okay? Is Chara okay?” Alphys glances to where you’re sitting on the floor, looking confused. You give her a quick thumbs up.

“Oh, she’s absolutely perfect!” Aria’s voice is steeped in sarcasm, which makes Alphys recoil. “Of course it’s not okay! That freaking drug made her lose her damn mind!” 

“W-what?” Alphys almost whispers. Sans is leaning over the guard rail from the second floor. You wave to him. He looks concerned but waves back.

“Good new, this stuff works. Not a peep from Chara at all even when prompted, says this Chara." She points you. "Bad news, the reason the other Chara probably can’t do anything is because they’re probably just as fuck up as our Chara is!” Aria spins in an aggravated circle much to Alphys' dismay. “Okay, she’s totally coherent but it’s like she has no inhibitions and can’t stop herself from doing whatever! She was wired all damn night and kept everyone awake, ask her roommates! I thought she was going to jump out the window at one point! I can’t even sleep, never mind study! I know I said I would watch her, but I can’t. I just can’t.”

Alphys shuffles over to you, mostly to give Aria a second to calm down. “Chara, d-do you know where you a-are?”

You hum in response. “The lab.” That’s obvious, so you’ll just tell her something else that’s obvious in case she didn’t know. “You’re very yellow Alphys.”

“See?!” She screeches. “And she’s worse when she isn’t sleep deprived! I can’t watch her. I’ll end up killing her.”

“Then what do I do?” You ask. You’re aware you’re part of this conversation but of what consequence you don’t know.

“I w-won’t be here this w-weekend.” Alphys says nervously. “Undyne has w-work out of town and I’m s-supposed to go with h-her.”

You watch Aria and Alphys look up toward the second floor. You will too! Oh, Sans. You can’t decide if you’re okay with that or not.

“Oh no,” Sans grumbles, refusing to leave the safety of the second floor. “Hell no. She is still pissed at me, and I am not watching her while she’s like that.”

“SANS!” Aria really is on her last leg of patience, you think. You’re slightly pleased to have brought her to such a point. Such power. “If you don’t watch Chara, so help me, I will come up and rip every single one of your ribs out and give them to the dogs at Grillby’s!”

Sans drags his knuckles across the metal. “Alright, alright. Shit, no need to _dog_ me about it.”

“Don’t think I won’t come up there!” She says while grinding her teeth.

Sans drags a hand down his face as he walks down the stairs. “Aria, this is a bad idea.”

“I don’t want Sans to stay with me.” You pout on the floor. “He’s mean.”

“Chara,” Aria squats down so she’s eye level with you. “You haven’t been friends very long and I know you’re super out of it. But Sans isn’t mean. I am. And unless you want me to prove it to you, Sans is going to watch you or I will kill you.” She pats the side of your face.

You scoot back. “O-okay.” And people thought Chara was scary?

“What about the roommates?” Sans asks, as Alphys tries to coax you off the floor. You aren’t really into a standing right now.

“Dena and Caroline left to go to their homes earlier, but Mercedes will be. They just know she was freaking out last night, but not about what.” She shrugs, significantly calmer. You wonder how she’s able to switch emotions like that so well.

Sans nods in approval. “That’s not terrible. Mercedes is pretty chill.”

Mercedes is not chill. She’s standing in the living room when you get back to the apartment, Sans practically shoving you through the door. He wouldn’t let you put your hands in the snow.

She winces a little when Sans actually walks into the room, but hold her ground. “Mercedes! Look at you! You’re so brave!” You coo. She shoots you the closest thing she can make to a dirty look before directing her attention back at Sans.

“Aria said you’re going to watch Chara since she’s been feeling…weird.” She cringes when you walk into the kitchen and drink straight out of the milk bottle. “But! If you do anything that makes Chara upset,” She fumbles around with her cardigan until she pull out her phone. You can see that Sans looks fairly amused with her. She holds her phone out, putting on her toughest face.

“If you do anything, I’ll call Papyrus and Undyne and tell them exactly what you did to Chara.”

If Sans has eyes they would have popped right out of his skull.

“Mercedes! I’m so proud of you!” You shout, tripping over one of the bar stools. You dramatically and unnecessarily fall to the floor so you can laugh like a banshee without worry.

“Listen, Mercedes,” Sans puts up both hands like he’s been caught. “I’m just here to watch her. Besides…” Sans and Mercedes give you sympathetic looks as you pull loose strands from the carpet. “What?” You roll over, giggles bubbling up from the back of your throat.

Sans scoops you up from the floor, earning a quick scowl from Mercedes. “Don’t worry! Sans is the worst!” You laugh, but don’t bother to try to get out of his grasp. He could stay like that all day, whatever.

Sans practically throws you on your bed and grabs your rolling chair to sit in. You roll yourself up in your blankets. “Shit, no wonder Aria was about to burn down the building. You’re a pain in the ass, you know that?”

You pop your head out from your self-made bundle. “You don’t have an ass.”

One of Sans’ brow bones rises. “You heard me.” You stick your tongue out and  shuffle so your back in your cocoon.

“You trying to make me the _butt_ of the joke?” He walks over, pulling up part of the blanket. You cover your face and start laughing again. You stop for a second feeling very dumb, but it’ a fleeting moment. You shoot your arms out to the front of Sans shirt in an attempt to pull him forward, but instead your just pull yourself further from your blankets.

“What are you doing?” Sans ask, a slight crack in his voice. He starts to lean down toward you, but pulls back. The motion drags you out too far, and you slide to floor. You think it’s an acceptable location, but Sans doesn’t seem to agree counting the few steps he takes away from you.

“Nothing.” You grin big, feeling your face get hot except you aren’t sure why. Doesn’t matter. “Thinking.”

Sans sits back in the chair, trying not to look at you. Rude.

“Did you know if your put marshmallows in the microwave for more than ten second then explode?” You laugh.

“No, I didn’t know that.” He says, probably only responding to you because it’s easier than not.

“Yeah!” You whip yourself around so you can prop yourself up on your elbows. “It can be a pretty _sticky_ situation.”

The chair creeks when Sans leans back, a look of disbelief on his face. “I can make jokes, too.” You tease. Sans shakes his head, suppressing a laugh. “Talk about a 180. We haven’t had an actual conversation since…well.”

“Oh! That’s not because I’m mad. Mostly.” You continually interlace and unwind your fingers. When you look up from your fingers your realize Sans is waiting for an answer. You actually don’t plan on responding, but your inside thoughts are simultaneously concordant with you outside thoughts.

“Caroline said I just suck it up and have sex with you. But I’m being weird about it.” You continue to observe the intricacies of how your own fingers work.

You whine when Sans gets up and walks out your room practically sweating bullets. You jump up from the floor, following him out to the living room. “Hey, wait! Was it something I said?”

You spend the next six hours jumping between annoying the shit out of Sans and making him question his morality. Mercedes hangs around as long as she can stand, but eventually gives up a few hours in. The worst, or best, part of all of this is that you can’t really stop yourself and you’re completely aware of that. The fun can’t last forever and you pass out around sundown.

You pop out from under your comforter while it’s still pitch black outside. You alarm blares that it’s just past one AM. How you got into your pajamas, you don’t know but you’re more concerned about the fact that Sans isn’t in the same place he was the last time he stayed over. You don’t like that.

As quietly as you hope to be, you trek into the living room to find Sans passed out on the couch, nestled into one corner, arms folded over. “Sans?” It’s a whisper-shout. “Sans, are you awake?”

There’s no response, except for the rhythmic intermittent breaths coming from Sans. You hold your hand out in front of his face to see if any air is actually coming out and sure enough there is.

When did you get in such close prosimity to Sans? You sit on the couch so your back is pressed against his side. In a moment of lucidness you wonder if you’re actually not mad at Sans anymore. Maybe not. Probably not. Maybe you should cut him some slack, he did seem to be trying hard. He would only be in your presence if you seemed okay with it, waiting for you to give him the okay or no go for everything.

Your moment is over when you decide that you should cut him some slack right this minute. You twist yourself around so you’re facing him and prop yourself up by sitting fully on one knee. He wouldn’t be mad right? Even though you made an attempt to think about it, you’re already pressing kisses along the ridge of Sans’ jaw.

As you start to trail down his neck, maneuvering around the small bone prominences there, he starts to grumble but the noise turns into a deep groan when you get to his collar bone. He shifts hard almost knocking you over, and while you try to grab onto his jacket, you miss and get his ribs instead.

Sans shudders awake, and hand going straight to his head. “What…What?!” There’s a fast flash of blue in Sans’ eye and you’re shot back to the other side of the couch. You’re not hurt in the slightest but you’re completely dazed.

“Chara? You scared the shit out of me.” Sans scrambles to sit up straight, still confused, eye quickly dissipating of magic. “What are you…” Sans runs his hand from his jaw downward. “Where you? Fucking hell, Chara.” Sans drops back into the couch, looking defeated.

You’re still trying to get yourself out of a magic haze when you realize Sans is already standing up, and pulling your arm like a child who’s in immense amounts of trouble. He drops you off in front of your room and continues on to start pounding on Mercedes door.

When you hear the door creek open, the first thing that happen is an ear piercing screech. There’s a moment of Sans trying to convince Mercedes she is, in fact, not having a nightmare. Once she’s somewhat coherent you can see Sans pointing at you and doing a lot more hand gestures than you’re used to seeing him make. Mercedes pokes her head around the door frame and you wave to her.

There’s another minute of back and forth before Mercedes shouts “I don’t care what you do! Just let me sleep!” And slams the door shut.

Sans stomps back up to you, grabbing your arm again. “Haha, Mercedes yelled at you.” You giggle as you’re pulled to your feet. Sans doesn’t even bother actually bringing you anywhere and slams the door shut when you’re far enough in the room.

“What the hell are you doing?” He says in an even tone. You just cock your head and shrug. Which is honestly the entire summary of how well you’ve thought this through.

“Listen,” Sans watches you with one eye as you climb on your bed and crawl to the middle. “I am trying to fix the stupid mistakes I can prove to you I won’t do that shit again and not take advantage of this stupid situation. And you are currently making that excruciatingly hard because I know you know what’s going on. And if I do anything you’ll be pissed to shit when you’re done with this drug fucking you up.”

You start to whimper from where you are, putting your hands to your face. “Shit, I’m not yelling at you, Chara.” Sans carefully treads over, holding his hands out in an attempt to be non-threatening. You pull your arm past your face like you’re crying, topping it off with a hiccup. Sans tries to say something soothing to you and he gets closer but as he’s almost hovering over, your arms shoot up around his neck so he’s trapped when you press your mouth against his.

“I can’t believe you fell for that!” You laugh, keeping your hands locked around Sans. A small cord of fear shoots through you when you realize the lights in Sans’ eyes are gone. You immediately let go and push yourself so you’re up against the wall. The words are already spilling out of your mouth, not that you would have been able to stop them. “C-can’t take a joke? I thought that was your thing.”

In a split second, Sans has your hands pinned above your head and he’s directly over you. “Of course I can take a joke. But you seem to have missed a very vital part.” That’s a tone you know. The low, somber voice you’ve become accustom to in the last few week is back to Sans’ smug, laugher filled manner.  

“What’s that?” You twist your hands, hoping to loosen them a little, but it’s to no avail. If there was an emotion smack between worried and excited, this was it.

“Follow up.”

Everything happens all at once with Sans kissing you like he’s starving and his free hand already languidly stroking between your legs, which is only made more intense due to soft fabric of your pajamas. You gasp against his mouth not sure if you’re supposed to be moving away from him or towards him. You aren’t sure about anything currently.

After a few tortuous minutes Sans slows his pace even more, causing you the whine in disappointment. “You want it?” There’s a rough push against your crotch, teasing you from the outside. You nod your head, biting down on your bottom lip. Sans’ releases your wrists, your arms falling at your side in exhaustion.

“You have to say it.” His voice is low and rough, sending a chill up your spine. You aren’t sure what he means, since your mind is in such a fog. “Say you want it so I know won’t regret it tomorrow.”

“I want it…” You say quietly, voice shaky and ragged. “Please.”

Sans doesn’t bother with other formalities, when he slips his hand past your waist band to your entrance. “Shit,” Sans rubs at you with the same painful, slow circulation motions he was doing earlier. But it hurt in the best way as you feel your arousal throb against him. “A guy could drown down there.”

“You think you’re so funny…” You start to complain, but Sans shoves an entire finger inside of you, directing it toward your core. You can’t stop the heavy moan that erupts from you, grabbing Sans’ shoulder and arching into him. It’s a pretty effective way to shut you up.

Sans curses to himself as he picks up speed, and is forced to put one of his hands over your mouth and pressing himself against you because you’re slowly building up very audible volume. When he’s sure you’re got some control back, he threads his hands into your hair, giving it firm pulls now and again. Sans adds a second finger, the natural ridges in his bones causing you to squirm and tighten around him. He does a natural progression of speeding and slowing down, as you try to ignore the slick sound coming from in between you. You can hear Sans muttering to himself, something about tight, but you’re so close to the edge you’re bordering incoherent.

Sans changes the pace to fast, long pulls when he realizes you’re close which send you straight into a massive orgasm. Somewhere in your mind you know you’re not supposed to scream so you bury your head into the crook of Sans’ neck, gritting your teeth.

After it’s over you sag against Sans, breathing heavily. He’s in a similar state freeing both hands from their previous locations so that he’s holding you against him instead. You’re okay with that.

You start to shift around, but Sans gently pushes you against the wall. You wretch your face in confusion, and he swings his legs off the bed. “Uh?” Is the only thing that comes out of your mouth, slightly hoarse.

 “That’s probably enough for now. As much as it actually kills me, you’re still not all there.” He quickly moves his hand from left to right but you can’t keep with the motion. You grab his hand to steady it, quickly becoming distracted by how they’re definitely larger than actual skeleton fingers. Which were just inside you.

“I would rather you be totally here, and not in crazy Chara land if we ever manage to get that far.” He gingerly pushes some of your hair out of your face. “Which brings me to my last piece of advice for the aspiring comedian.”

You may not be totally with it, but you know you’re not going to like what he says when he stand up and grips the door handle, ready to leave.

“Always leave them wanting more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look! Nothing horrible happened! I am also complete trash and need to reevaluate my life as it is right now. 
> 
> Don't worry though. I'm just giving you guys something nice for right now.


	30. Glass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for graphic scenes.

The next morning you’re greeting with a terrible headache. You rub at your eyes, hoping that maybe it will it will help subdue to pain. It doesn’t.

At least you’ve been nightmare memory free for three nights straight. Granted you didn’t sleep one of those nights, but a win is a win. You lay back in your bed, starting to make out muffled voices from the living room. While you would like to decipher the situation from your room, the pounding in your head makes it too difficult.

You don’t even bother to change when you walk out into the living room. Sans and Mercedes are standing maybe ten feet away from each other. “Give me back my phone!” Mercedes jostles forward and back, while Sans clutches her phone. “Not until you say you won’t call anyone. She said it was okay.”

“She though drinking water on her back was okay! I warned you!” Mercedes is doing her best to stand firm, but you can already hear her voice cracking.

“Why are we arguing so loud?” You whine, pushing your hand to where your head was throbbing the worst. You’re still not completely fine, but you can tell the drugs have strongly worn off already. Both of them freeze when they realize you’re there.

“Hey Chara…how are you feeling?” Sans asks carefully, in the same way someone breaks bad news. You study them for a second before you start piecing together your experiences over the past few days. Or rather in the last half day. Your face starts to heat up when you actually remember what happened last night between you and Sans.

While you’re evaluating how exactly you’re supposed to deal with this situation, you watch Mercedes silently shuffle over to where Sans in, who’s too distracted by your response to notice. It’s a swift motion, as Mercedes rips her phone out of Sans’ fingers and launches herself clear across the room.

“Fuck! Mercedes,” Sans tries to keep watching you, but Mercedes is already in a nervous cackle holding the phone up like a trophy. “Don’t call anyone until you ask Chara if she’s okay, right?” He motions to you, but you’re already sitting on the floor in a mortified daze, face covering your hands.

“Oh yeah, that looks like someone totally okay with what happened!” Mercedes shouts, but then whimpers and recoils when Sans starts to walk towards her. Despite your current state, you have to admit that’s only half true. Somehow you were simultaneously ecstatic that it happened and horrified, despite the circumstances. And the circumstances were not good.

Mercedes takes a deep breath which gets your attention. “I’m calling Papyrus!”

“Wait!”

Oh, that was your voice. “We shouldn’t get Papyrus involved, he doesn’t need that.” Sans gives you a look like there might be hope. “But Chara!” Mercedes cries, still clutching her phone with excessive force.

“I can just call Aria.”  You say through your own haze.

You’re on your feet headed to your room, but Sans is already in front of the door. You skid to a halt “You’re only supposed to do that in emergencies!”

“Does this not count as one?” He grumbles. You try to push past him, but you’ve never been able to get Sans to move before so why would this be different?

You take a step back. “I wasn’t all there and you still did…that!” You point into your room, flustered as hell.

Sans leans his hand against the doorframe. “I’m sorry, alright. It was wrong and I won’t even touch you again at all. Can we just not get other people involved, again?”

You rock back on your heels. “I didn’t say that.” You practically whisper, feeling dumb as hell. Without looking you know he’s already got that stupid grin on his face. “But that doesn’t mean you’re not in fucking trouble. And if you ever do that again the other Chara will be the least of your worries because I’ll kill you myself.”

Sans still doesn’t let you in your room, and continues to do so when his phone starts ringing.

“Let me in my room.” You say before he gets a chance to answer it.

“Give me a second, its Alphys.”

You huff, but you suppose if you would accept any excuse right now it would be that. You realize Mercedes is trying to get your attention from the end of the hallway. Since you can’t go anywhere anyways you head over to where she is. She takes both arms and pulls you into the living room.

“Chara, I’m so sorry! He came to my room last night saying you were driving him crazy and I didn’t do anything! You screamed and…I’m the worst roommate ever.” She sobs.

Besides the fact that you’re insanely embarrassed that Mercedes heard anything, but you were more upset that Mercedes was upset. “What are you talking about, none of that was your fault. And I think it sounded worse than it was.” You rub at the back of your head. “It was Sans’ fault!”

Mercedes gives you a questioning look. “I know what happened. But I’m not going to let him off easy.” She nods. It would end up that you would have to calm Mercedes down about this instead of the other way around.

“Hey.” Sans is waiting entrance to the hallway, arms folded over. “Are you feeling alright enough to go out?”

“What?” You almost growl the words, and you can see Mercedes sneer.

“Calm down. Apparently Undyne’s trip got canceled. Alphys says if you’re feeling up to she wants us to meet in the lab ASAP.”

Its awkward waiting for Alphys alone in the lab with Sans. “When’s she going to be here?”

“Few minutes. Aria’s going to be here a little later.” He sighs, shaking his head.

That makes you seethe. He doesn’t have any right at all. “What the hell are you upset about?”

“Because you’re only angry with me on principle.”

“It’s the principle that fucking matters! God, how is someone so smart so fucking stupid?” You angrily pace back and forth trying to keep yourself from completely walking off.

Sans doesn’t say anything else until Alphys gets there.

“Oh g-good! You’re both h-here!” Alphys walks in with what seems like a sense of victory. “I-I’m sorry this d-drug was so h-hard on you Chara, but I h-have the solution!”

“I’ll say.” You say under your breath. Alphys turns to you. “Did you say something?”

“Uh, yeah. I really don’t want to try anymore experimental medications Alphys.” You tuck your arms behind your back, feeling a little bad about telling her no, but you just can’t take it anymore.

“That’s p-perfect because we’re g-going to see the King instead! Asgore s-says he’d be w-willing to help a h-human with a soul p-problem!”

You’re not sure what that’s supposed to mean, but between Sans immediately arguing with Alphys about it and the horrible wrenching pain in your chest, it can’t be good.

“Alphys, are you insane? We’d have to tell everyone everything if we did that. And you want Asgore to learn one of his kids is possessing humans and trying to kill everyone?” Sans motions to you, but withdraws his hand when he sees you doubled over, clutching your chest.

Alphys moves past Sans, to get a better look at. “Chara? Are y-you okay?”

You shoot back up, a smile stretched across your face. “Yep, just some stomach pains. I just need to get something to drink.”

It takes you a hot minute to figure out that’s not you, even though it sounds exactly like you. There isn’t a moment to do anything as you walk toward the back of the first floor. Once you’re out of eye and earshot you round a corner to an areas rarely used, mostly used to store volatile substances.

Your entire body collapses onto the floor, hitting the linoleum hard. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” You hiss downward.

_I will not see Asgore._

There’s a hard spasm completely overtaking your body as you both fight for control. “It’s not your choice!” You want to shout so many someone will hear you, but you can barely speak at this point.

_I am tired of these feeble attempts to stop the inevitable. I will have what I want, and I have no choice but to take it now._

You lose the fight for control. Chara’s determination is far more than yours is. They have a purpose and, good or bad, that outweighs yours no matter how much you want to stop them. You still have some fight left in you, as you try to pull them back when they start crawling over to one of the cabinets. It’s the only one without a thin layer of dust over the handle. They weakly pull open the doors to reveal a few sealed flasks of thick, black, tarry liquid. Fear rips through your soul.

“Chara, what is that?” You cry from inside, pulling harder at your own body, trying to make them drop the bottle they’ve chosen, but it’s not enough.

“Liquid LV. Do you really think I’ve been able to take control against all those drugs? I must admit, that crack pot scientist really does know what she’s doing. But she’s simply no match for her predecessor’s inventions.” Chara removes the cork, sloshing the liquid around in its container. “And it might have worked, but then again, I’ve been the opponent.”

You can taste the liquid as Chara takes generous helping. It’s horrific, burning your throat like dense, bubbling tar with every drink Chara takes. They effectively finish the entire bottle, gagging with the last sip. “That’s the most I’ve had all at once. I’m surprised you never took notice.” They say to you, wiping their mouth and rubbing it on the edge of your jacket. “I was even able to do it while you were in the lab and not sleeping. Much more convenient that way.”

You sob to yourself on the inside. This was happening the whole time, and you never knew. You’d been confident it was under control and now you were completely at Chara’s mercy because of your passiveness.

“Do not cry just yet, dear Chara. The terror has only just begun.” Chara takes out your phone and starts looking through contacts. “You know, I am just the slightest bit sorry someone like you had to be part of this game. I admire how hard you work. There!”

You can see what Chara does, and realize you’re look at Papyrus’ contact information. “What are you doing?” You ask quietly, terrified of the answer. They don’t answer, already having hit the call button.

_“Small human! How great it is to hear from you!”_

“Hi Papyrus.” You can feel Chara smirk as they almost perfectly imitate your voice. “I actually have a small favor to ask of you.”

_“Of course! The great Papyrus is always up for the challenge!”_

“Great. I actually just need you to call Sans on the phone and distract him for a bit. I have a big surprise for him and I need to set it up. Tell him to leave the room for me, too.”

_“That’s fantastic! I am so glad you and Sans are getting along again! This will make him very happy! I shall call right away!”_

“Thanks Papyrus.” Chara ends the call, feeling extremely pleased with themselves. You scramble around in what feels like darkness for a second as Chara wait near the corner for Sans to leave. “Why are you making Sans leave? I thought you wanted him gone.”

“Of course I want him gone, but I do not have nearly enough LV to take him again on just yet. But Sans is just an obstacle. My target deserves the death I give to them.” You can hear Sans talking on the phone with what you can only assume is Papyrus.

As soon as you hear the metal door clunk shut, Chara drops the flask still in their hand to the floor. It shatters, bar a few large chunks of the durable glass. You try to recoil when you realize Chara is reaching for the largest, sharpest piece. They pick it up without regard, letting the cool glass slice through the skin on your hand. You can feel it burn through as hot blood trickles down the jagged edge.

“If you hadn’t have dropped my knife back then, we would have no issue now. This is a little punishment just for you.” Chara laughs, making you watch your own blood fall to the floor.

“Chara? Is e-everything okay? I heard a g-glass break.” It’s Alphys. Chara walks themselves out of the hall, glass blade hidden behind your back. You grimace inside each time they clutch it, eliciting another sharp burn. But what does Chara want with Alphys?

“I am quiet fine, thank you for asking.” Chara rounds Alphys once, in the same way a predator does to prey. Alphys watches you nervously, taking a step back when she realizes something isn’t right. “A-are you sure…” Her words trail off when Chara looks directly at them.

“Chara…why are y-your eyes that c-color…” Realization washes over her face. “You’re not our Chara.”

Chara laughs withdrawing the glass shard from behind. “You’re just as pathetic as I remember Dr. Alphys. And you haven’t changed in the slightest. Still experimenting on innocent souls for your own disgusting pleasure.”

Alphys shutters behind her claws, trying to get away, but stumbles over herself. “T-that, that was a l-long time ago.” She whimpers. “And I w-was only t-trying to keep Chara safe f-from you.”

“Safe!” Chara’s mocking tone turns dark and grainy while you scream for them to stop. You feel a pressure from above pushing your will down. “That’s nothing but a lie! Is that what you thought when you turned Asriel into a soul-less plant? That you were saving him from oblivion? You want nothing more than to play with life, human or otherwise. You never deserved to be saved! You don’t deserve to live!”

This was the first time you felt actual anger radiate from Chara. It pounded around you, blaring in your ears, choking you. They step forward, hand shaking and raised with the already bloody weapon. “And I’d be happy to remove you from this earth.”

You can feel your body moving forward on the attack, but something yanks you back hard trapping your free arm. “I don’t think so.” Aria has you in a half body lock and Chara struggles against her much larger frame.

“Release me!” Chara barks, continuing to smash themselves against Aria. “What? Do you think I’m stupid! I’ll knock you out if I have to!”

“Oh really?” You can feel Chara switch the grip of the glass as it slides past your palm, further digging in. You use every part of you to scream for Aria to let go and get back but only Chara can hear you. It’s a swift and quick motion, but it’s like it’s happening in slow motion as the crude knife pierces Aria in her side. She immediately drops, gripping at the fresh wound as blood seeps onto the floor.

“LV matters here, and mine is far above yours. Size only helps if we were everyday humans. We aren’t. I’ll make sure to end your misery as soon as Alphys is nothing but dust.” Chara shakes Aria’s blood off the glass as she tries to get up but just shouts profanities at Chara.

“Now where was I?” Chara turns their attention back to the terrified Alphys. But once again on your approach you’re stuck. Except this time you’re flung against a wall and held there. “No!” Chara screeches and they struggles against an electric blue force.

Sans is standing directly in front of Aria, one hand on her head and she stays on the ground trying to put pressure against her side, other hand holding you down from afar. His one eye almost looks like its on fire.

“Looking for a bad time?”

The range building in Chara is insurmountable and they pull against a force they can’t escape from. All of sudden you feel a shift and the rage turns into something else. Something dark.

“You must think you are some hero now. You’ve saved all the weaker humans and monsters from me, but only for the first time. If we were underground, you would have let them all die. Just like before.” You can feel the pressure of Sans magic increase.

“You should be much more careful with your powers. We don’t want another accident do we?” The pressure lets up as Chara laughs.

“You’re just as disgusting as that lizard. You are no better than me, using this human for your own wants as often as I do. You think saving them from me will fix how utterly stupid you are? If you believe that, you deserve to turn to dust as well!” Chara cackles from their trapped state.

“Alphys. We need determination serum, now. Pure only.” Sans grits his teeth as Alphys continues to trip over self.

Chara’s heavy breathing is making you lightheaded, as you can start to feel actual tears star flowing. “Stop crying.” They growl, but just knowing you can do something from the inside is enough for you to cry even more.

Sans takes the silence to kneel and check on Aria, but they’re talking too quietly for either of your to hear. “Wouldn’t it be fun if the double soul died?” They muse. “Between that and how he refuses to actually harm you I could even destroy him as I am now.”

“Shut up! Shut up!” You cry.

You give your attention back when you feel Chara shift. “Get that away from me!” Sans already your arm and pushing the silvery liquid into you. 

The feeling of coming back to your own body is both a relief and a nightmare. You collapse to the ground violently shaking and sobbing while making sure you’re actually back to this world. You can see Sans starting to reach for you, but you try to get past him to Aria. You don’t get very far before crumbling to the floor again.

“Aria, I’m so sorry! Please, be okay!” You wail from the ground. Alphys is already on the phone with EMS, as Aria shakes her head. “Don’t worry about it. Shit like this happens to me all the time.” She says feebly and trying to smile. She quickly doubles back down, groaning in pain. Alphys helps Aria sit up, but she’s shaking just as badly as you are.

“Chara, this isn’t your fault” Sans kneels down in front of you. “I know you knew what was happening and everything but you…couldn’t stop it.” Sans puts a hand over mouth, brow bones knit together. “Fuck. I _am_ just as bad as they are. I’m so sorry Chara.”

You can’t even completely register what Sans’ actual sincere apology because you’re so upset about stabbing Aria. You’re still laying on the ground crying into your hands, getting blood everywhere.

 “Sans, the ambulance is going to be here in a few minutes.” Alphys calls from the short distance away.

“You go with her. I’ll stay here with Chara until I can take her there, too.” Sans sits down next to you, careful not to touch you. Alphys nods as she and Sans get Aria down stairs.

You don’t even know how long you’re alone before Sans is back in the lab. You’re sitting on the balls of your feet, checking how deep the cuts in your hand are through hard sobs. You look at him only for a minute through watery eyes.

“I can’t do this anymore Sans.” You choke out. “I’m not strong enough for this. I’m not determined enough.”

Sans pulls you into a hug as you continue to cry.

“I’m so sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter was hard on me and so was this one. I need a nap.


	31. Removal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Is super upbeat and tries to be positive about everything  
> Me writing this: EVERYTHING IS DEPRESS
> 
> But I liked writing about a hospital. I'm a dork.

You’ve never liked the smell of antiseptic.

But that’s what the hospital smells like. A young PA, probably not much older than Aria, methodically binds your hand after placing some type of medical glue over the slashes across your palm. Once again, you’re lucky enough to escape without scars. Physical ones, anyways.

“How did you do this again?” He asks, carefully maneuvering around your thumb.

“Accident. I dropped some glass. I tried to catch it.” You say robotically. Sans took you to ER after at least 30 minutes of trying to calm you down and some much needed clean up. You suppose it was worth the effort since you might have just told the PA you tried to murder someone.

He finishes after that, patting the side of your leg. “You’re good to go. And it was just an accident, don’t stress too much over it. Hope we won’t see you back too soon.” He pulls open the curtain and you thank him on your way out.

“So?” Sans is in the waiting room, flipping through his phone. He’s noticeably alone in the waiting room, most of the other people sitting on the opposite side. It makes you slightly uncomfortable.  

You ignore his question anyways. “How’s Aria?”

“Alphys says they stabilized her and she got twelve stitches a little bit under her ribs but she’s got no serious internal injury.” You drop into the seat next to him, pulling at your hair with your good hand, making a choking noise. “That’s good.”

Sans leans over. “You want to go see her?” You practically jump up from the chair. Sans cracks half a smile. “Guess that’s a yes.”

Aria’s in an actual room when Sans brings you to where she is. There’s another medical student in the room when you get there, so you hover outside. “You would fall with the box full of glass helping Alphys.” They laugh.

You hear Aria laugh back. “You know me, go big or go home.” You try to peek inside and the other medical student spots you. “Looks like you’ve got company.” She says, waving to Aria.

“She’s on an ass ton of painkillers, don’t let her out of the bed.” She whispers to you as she walks out, giving you a wink. “Hey Sans.” He nods to let her know he heard her. She gives a quick wave before trotting off to catch up with one of the actual doctors.

You try to prepare yourself for the worst, but Aria looks…fine. A little bit disheveled, but mostly fine. You still hesitate when you come into the room. Sans, on the other hand, acts like it’s an everyday thing. “Feeling better, you freak? Who jumps into a knife?”

Aria rolls her eyes. “I’m surprised they let a literal walking symbol of human death come into a hospital.”

“That’s offensive.” Sans leans on the edge of the hospital bed. You aren’t sure what you should do. You start to think coming was a bad idea, since you’re the one who, well, it’s a lot to think about.

“Chara, what are you doing?” Aria leans forward, watching you tug at your own hair.

“I just…” You slowly start but Aria groans impatiently. “I swear if you say this is your fault I’m going to call the psych unit on you.”

You start to argue but Aria’s having none of it and with more ferocity than usual. “It’s not your fault! Sans, would you back me up?” Sans just sort of stares off into space, completely unaware that Aria is even speaking to him. “Yo lazybones, which one of us is supposed to be out of it?”

Sans just sort of shrugs in response. Aria gives him a hard stare which she then redirects at it you. You shutter when she does.

“For fuck’s sake, what the hell happened now? Do I even want to know?” Aria hisses, pressing her hands to her head. There’s no answer from anyone as tension hangs heavy in the air.

You assume it’s been too quiet for Aria’s liking. “Sans, go find Alyphs. I asked her to get me food like 15 minutes ago.” Aria pushes Sans with one of her feet under the hospital blanket. Sans pushes himself off the metal part of the bed and starts walking out, making approximately zero eye contact with you. “Check surgery! They have those surgery robots at this hospital!” She calls to him as he’s out the door.

“Okay.” Aria breathes out, rubbing at her face. “I’m assuming you’ll have to rehash the story of however you ended up…well you know.” You grimace when Aria does stabbing motions in the air. “So I’m assuming that little display was because it was a bad idea to leave you alone with Sans, huh?”

“Uh, yeah. Stuff…just happened. While I was on the drug I couldn’t stop myself. But he didn’t stop himself either.” You put your head down, because for the first time in a long time you remember how close Aria and Sans are. You peek out from between your bangs to get a glimpse of Aria’s reaction, which currently just wheels turning.

“Are you serious?” Aria leans back, arms folded over her chest. “He should damn well know better than that.”

“Mercedes almost called Papyrus this morning because of it.”  

“Did you let her? Sans hates making Papyrus upset. Would have taught him a lesson for sure.”

“I didn’t.” You pause, trying to relive the morning but everything still felt like a blur. “I’m not sure why. I was actually going to call you instead.” You wander closer to the bed, leaning on the silver painted bar across the end.

Aria’s face wrenches a little bit. “That doesn’t make sense. I chew Sans out all the time, it wouldn’t have the same impact.” You round the bar and sit at the edge of the bed. “We just keep dragging more people into this hell hole. I just want all of it to be done with.”

You look up when you hear Aria scooting down the bed toward you. “Sometimes you baffle me beyond belief. How do you care so much about everyone else? There has to be something in there for you. Don’t you want Sans to sorrier than he’s ever been?”

“Yes.” You mumble. “I want him to be excruciatingly sorry for it. I didn’t want it to be that way.” You can feel the frown set against your face. You should be resolute about this. It was wrong. Sans was wrong.

“Well that’s good.” Aria rolls her head a little bit until there’s a faint crack. “If you want, I can still chew him out.” You take a second, about to nod but you don’t.

“I should try to handle it myself, huh?” You pause. “But if you do it anyways, can you jam your hand in his eye again?”

You’re both laughing when Sans and Alphys walk back into the room. “Looks like you’re in even more _stitches_ than before.” Sans grins.

“Just wait ‘til later. You’ll see some damn stitches.” Alphys gives Sans an odd look after Aria makes her opinion know, but he just acts like he has no idea what she’s talking about.

“Alright,” A nurse rasps her fist against the corner, holding Aria’s chart. “If we want to get her out of here by tonight everyone’s going to have to go to the waiting room so I can get some vitals.”

Alphys hangs back in the room for whatever reason while you and Sans go out the waiting area near the elevators. Instead of even attempting conversation, you just pick at the loose part of the bandages around your hand listening to the muffled voices coming from a severely outdated TV.

“We should just be done, right?” You finally say, pushing your undamaged hand through your hair. You don’t look directly at him, but there’s no one else in the room but you and Sans. There’s another long silence before Sans answers. “Up to you.”

There’s not a chance for you to think about it before Alphys scurries up, looking somewhat flustered. “Are you f-feeling okay, Chara?”

“I guess.”

“That’s g-good because I w-would like you to t-tell me what happened. I know my last t-try at medication f-failed…and the one b-before that…” Alphys wrings her claws together, shame spread across her face.

“Actually,” Maybe you just should have said you weren’t feeling okay. Talking about it was going to be hard. “Your first one did work. But the other Chara…the bad Chara was drinking something called liquid LV to counteract that and the determination serum. You said something about…Asgore? And Chara lost it, making me drink a ton of it. I’ve been blacking out more than I thought I was and I’ve been drinking that stuff for months.” You pull your legs up onto the chair, huddling yourself together.

Alphys doesn’t say anything in response but when you look up at her all of the color is drained from her face. You turn to Sans, and if it was possible, he would look just as pale as Alphys. “T-that...how?”

“Alphys, were you keeping liquid LV in the lab?” Sans is gripping the wooden armrest of the seat so hard you’re worried he might break it.

Alphys scrambles for a second. “N-no! But I d-did keep the f-formula.” Sans still looks somewhat panicked but seems to accept Alphys’ answer. You get that. Throwing away research documents of any significance is a big no-no.

“B-but how did Chara g-get to it? When d-did they make it? And, o-oh no, how much is in t-the lab?”

Alphys places her hands on her head, like she’s trying to squeeze a solution out from her head. “I…I think…Chara y-you can’t come into the l-lab anymore.”

All of the air from your lungs escapes all at once. No. The lab was the only piece of your life that still made sense, the only place you still had control. “But Alphys…” Your voice is cracked and strained, more than in other situation. You can’t lose this too.

“I-it wouldn’t b-be forever. J-just until I can get a s-secure lock and g-get rid of every last d-drop of liquid LV. W-we also need to w-watch you. The effects of l-liquid LV are…permanent.”

“Alphys, we don’t have to go that far.” Your voice is almost at the point of pleading and you lean forward in the chair. “We know now! I can still come in! Please!”

“Chara, I’m s-sorry. But w-we can’t…take a-anymore chances.” The way Alphys looks at you with what you see as disappointment is the final straw and you feel your heart break to pieces. No matter what Sans or Aria say, you know you’re at least half of the problem. You try to rationalize that Alphys may have just felt bad about doing this, but you were almost too to distressed what was directed toward you and what wasn’t.

“We should probably get you on determination serum again. Just to keep this at bay.” Sans says flatly. You can feel yourself shaking, so much so you’re sure both Alphys and Sans can see it. More injections. No lab. You can’t even trust that you have control anymore.

In an attempt to calm yourself down you pull out your phone while Alphys and Sans quietly discuss your new regiment, one that you haven’t agreed to yet. But instead of being able to distract yourself you see texts from every which way from your roommates asking why you’ve been so strange, if you’re okay, why these things are happening to you and why you feel like you have to hide from them.

It’s too much. You feel like you have nothing left. You can’t even tell your friends the truth anymore.

“I’m going outside.” You stand up, feeling a surge of pain go through the gashes in your hand. You flash a glance at Sans. He’s trying to keep even, but you can tell he’s worried. “I just need to breathe.”

Cold air bites at your face when you leave the lobby of the hospital. You pull up your coat, but it does little from keeping the cold from causing your eyes to tear up. You wonder for a second if it’s just from the wind chill or if you’re actually starting to cry.

You don’t know what to do. This time you’d been lucky. Sans was there to stop you, yet again. But one of these days he wouldn’t be. This time it was Aria. Who would it be next time? Alphys? One of your roommates? Someone who doesn’t deserve to be hurt, you’re sure about that.

In your current state, you’re not sure about what other options you have. If you hope to even have one chance left to keep control it may be worth it.

Maybe this is what determination really feels like.

“Chara?” You keep your vision directly forward. A person passing gives you an odd look, but minds their own business. Once they’re gone you continue. “I know you’re there.”

_This is a surprise. I believed you would want to do everything to suppress me after this little incident._

“Because that’s been working so well.” You try to keep from sounding too disdainful. You called for them, after all.

_Agreed. Though I’m still questioning why you would want to speak with me._

You’re a little taken aback by Chara’s apprehension. It’s almost like your positions are reversed. It’s true. You don’t want to even hear that voice. It makes you ill just to know they’re still there.

“What if I said I wanted to make a deal with you?”

There’s a long silence from inside. You assume they’re contemplating exactly what you just said.

_Why?_

“If this keeps up the way it has, I’ll lose what little I have left. I’m lying to my best friends, I hurt Aria, and if I killed Alphys it would have blood on both of our hands.” Plus you have no idea what could ever remotely happen with Sans, but you keep that to yourself. “I figured if we could make a deal, I can at least avoid ruining everyone else’s life.”

 _Fair enough._ You can hear a hint of laughter behind those words. Earlier today that would have frightened you. But not now. _What do you have in mind?_

“If you swear to not hurt anyone anymore, I’ll take you to Mt. Ebott for whatever reason you want. And that means everyone. We just do whatever you want to there and that be the end of it. If I remove the both of us from this situation, then everyone can go back to their lives.”

_Is that all? Well, I would say we have a deal Chara._

A deal is a deal. You let yourself black out.

When you wake up, you don’t feel the same icy wind you did earlier. You also don’t feel snow, or anything of the like. Your entire body aches and you’re having trouble opening your eyes, but when you do, your vision is flanked with bobbing golden orbs like a dozen tiny suns.

As your vision starts to return you realize it’s a bed of sickly looking wild flowers. You groan, but you don’t seem to worse for the wear. You sit up, assessing exactly where you are.

A dark cavern? It’s a little worrying that the stalagmites hanging from the ceiling are larger than some homes. You follow the cave upward, noticing one large gaping hole at the roof. That’s not where you were last time. Is this where Chara meant to bring you?

“Chara? Where am I?” You ask. You press your hand over your chest, as if such an action would quell your exceedingly fast heart rate.

_Exactly where I meant for us to be. The Underground._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this came out as I hoped it would, it was hard to construe exactly what I wanted to out of this one. 
> 
> Basically, Chara's ultimate solution after feeling like she has nothing left is to remove the both of them since only getting rid of the Chara is currently not possible. 
> 
> Deals with the devil always have a twist though.


	32. The Underground

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This entire chapter is just kids making poor choices.  
> It's great.

“The Underground? I thought you just wanted to go to the stupid mountain! Not down it.” You shout, listening to your own voice booming back at you from the quickly darkening cavern walls. You could see a pocket of sun up against the high part of cavern, indicating the sun was setting. You must have been gone for hours.

You won’t let anyone know where you are this time.

Not that it mattered. You landed on your phone, smashing the screen and back piece to bits.

_I never said anything of the sort. You make too many assumptions._

You huff, but let your shoulders fall. It’s not worth it. “Now what?” You’re slightly perturbed by the way the wildflowers sway when they’re isn’t any wind.

_We find Flowey, of course. It will be awful to deal with in that form he has currently, but it is the only way to bring about Asriel._

“So where do I go? I don’t know if you’re aware, but I’ve never been down here.”

_It is not particularly complicated. I do not have the energy to take over at this time, but I can easily lead you through the puzzles in the ruins. You can handle such a simple task, correct?_

“Puzzles? I thought the Underground was turned into some kind of weird resort where the barrier was broken.” The resort had only opened to the public in the last year after some massive ‘renovations’, so only a handful of people had even gone to it. But it was supposed to be a big deal. The entrance was where the barrier broke was a three hour drive away from the peak of Mt. Ebott and four from the city.

_I highly doubt that…Toriel would not allow anyone to desecrate the ruins. This is the best place to start the search regardless._

It only take a minute or so to gather your bearings and orient yourself. There’s an intricate arch way carved from the dim purple stone in the cavern which you assume is the only way to go. You feel a little shaken walking through, but you’re not sure if it’s you or Chara casting this feeling of unease.

Apparently puzzles are a…thing in the Underground. Not that they seemed particularly challenging. Hell, half of them didn’t even work anymore. “So what exactly was the point of all these things?” You say, sliding past a broken down door, one that seemed like it possibly slid up and down in a trap-like fashion once upon a time. You think for a second you hear footsteps behind you but as you continue it turns to silence.

_Before Toriel revoked her title as the queen, this was a place to capture humans and easily bring them to the current king of the time as per tradition. We will reach the house shortly._

The next room and doorway is in similar disarray but you have to pull away some debris before you can get through. “Does that mean anyone lives in the Ruins still?” 

_Some possibly. Maybe not here, but some monsters adapted to live underground while others were and still are not ready to breech the surface. Isn’t that sick irony?_ You feel a dim laugh from your chest. _To wait your entire life for escape just to learn you won’t be leaving._

“Yeah, ironic.” You echo with sarcasm. That rang a little too closely to your own truth. You look back through the arched doorway, watching some of the rubble trickle to the floor. You tell yourself to relax. You’re here alone.

Alone in person, anyways.

_Are you listening to me?!_

Clearly not, as you fall through the floor with a poorly placed step. It’s not a far fall, but enough to scare the shit out of you and make sure you’ll have a nasty bruise on your back in the next few hours.

_Idiot! You need to stay vigilant here! Do you have any idea how long it would take me to find another suitable host and gain the amount of LV I need if you die?_

You lay back and groan. “And I am okay, thanks for asking.” You stay down, flipping crunchy dead leaves with your hands. You can’t say you expected this to be a fun time. How are there even leaves down here?

There’s shuffling from above and you know you hear it this time. “Are you sure there’s no one here?” You say a little too quickly, trying not to move too much.

_I said probably not. Are you always such a poor listener?_

“Do you always have to be such a jerk about everything? Maybe if you weren’t always so mean to me, I would listen to you!” You sit up, slamming your feet on the ground one after the other. “How do I get out of here?” You huff.

_Fine. I’ll make more of an effort to…not upset you for now. Go to the right, there is a small staircase._

How hard was that? For all the hell you’ve been put through they could at least spare you the insults and nasty attitude.

You’re achy from not one, but two falls in one day as you enter what looks like a courtyard lined with pale stone, encircling a massive tree. There’s something eerie about the lack of wind pulling through the leaves or the absence of rustling grass under your feet. Beyond the tree is a something of a small cottage front which you assume is your current destination.

Okay, small was the wrong word. It appeared small from afar, but it was the same jarring size difference as Toriel’s home on the surface. You almost feel rude going into someone else’s house without permission, regardless of the fact no one had lived there in years.

_I feel as though we have a combined apprehension about entering this home. But I believe Flowey to be beyond the Ruins. It is nothing but an empty home._

You agree, but still feel your heart ache for a second. You wonder what it’s like to enter the home of a family you destroyed. Better to not think about that one. You push open the heavy single panel wooden door with a long creek.

It’s almost pitch black in the home, but you know you’re in some kind of foyer as light pours in. It might have even felt warm, but before you have a second to look around more something slams into your knees and then back. Next thing you know you’re pinned to the ground and screaming, a hand holding your head to the floor.

“Keep them there Frisk!” It’s still dark, but you would know that voice anywhere. Aria’s already got your arm locked between her legs and you feel the familiar burn of a fast needle being injected into you.

“Stop! Stop! Aria, it’s me!” You struggle against the both of them, but you’re still sore from all that falling. You can feel Frisk’s weight move off of you, and you curse yourself for being small enough to have Frisk hold you down in the first place.

“What? You’re not possessed?” Aria scooches back, while you hear Frisk get up and turn on a light. They both study you, trying to figure out if that’s the truth.

“No! I’m not! Why did you do that?” You wait a few seconds to hear Chara, but nothing. They seem to agree with each other that yeah, you’re much less composed than the other Chara is any given situation. “And why is Frisk here!? Why are you here!? Did they let you out of the hospital?”

“Yes they let me out! They told me not to do anything strenuous, but you know. It was more of a suggestion I think.” She grins sheepishly. “And maybe everyone left to go to look for you before I was discharged and maybe I picked up Frisk on the way over because I know this is where Chara would have brought you and Frisks know more about Chara than anyone.”

“It wasn’t really the best idea, but we had to find you as fast as we could. Mom’s going to kill me.” Frisk says, helping you off the floor. “But we thought Chara possessed you and brought you here against your will, like last time.”

“Well they didn’t.” You growl, picking a direction to walk in. You find yourself in a sweet looking living room with a lone recliner and large dining table. It was more subtle than Toriel’s current décor, but still fit her floral, homey motif. “Chara, what do you mean they didn’t possess you?” Aria asks as Frisk hunts for another light switch. The lights come on, but they’re dim with the lack of use.

You move your hand up to start pulling at your hair but you stop yourself. You shouldn’t be nervous about a choice you made. “I made a deal with Chara to come down here. I can’t deal with everyone continually being hurt because of me.”

Aria starts “Chara it’s not…” But you cut her off. “Yes it is! Yeah, maybe it’s the other Chara doing this but it’s my fault too! I keep waiting for everyone else to do something about them and not doing anything myself! And this was all I could think of to do. I know it’s not well thought out but…but you can’t say anything about that because you just got out the hospital and kidnapped Frisk to come down here after me!” Your voice is almost reaching a new octave of frustration. “I didn’t want anyone to find me!”

“Hey, Frisk came willing!” Aria points at Frisk who jumps back. “And that’s do fucking bad!” Frisk nervous laughs at Aria’s lack of sensor. “We came after you because we want to help you! Everyone does! What could we expect you to do alone?”

“Chara?” Frisk sneaks over so they’re next to you. “I know what this is like…wanting to give up because you feel like you can’t do anything but give in.” They grab your hand, studying the backside of it. “But if you have people who want to help, you have to accept that we will, especially when you can’t help yourself.”

You try to take a deep breath but it turns into a hiccup. “I know that. But me being this way…it got you hurt.” You look at Aria who looks as tired and irritated as you feel. “And I can’t even remember what normal feels like anymore. I had to do something. And…how did you guys get down here anyways?”

Aria and Frisk exchange guilty looks. “Once a fallen child, always a fallen child?” Aria raises her hands and laughs.

“Aria!” Frisk scolds. You laugh behind one of your hands. It feels little better.

“Fine, Frisk has this old jetpack thing we used to get down, but it broke when we landed. They didn’t say it was only meant for the weight of one grade schooler.” She crosses her arms, putting her weight to one leg. It’s Frisk’s turn to play innocent.

“But that means we’re stuck here with you until the other get here.” Aria drops herself on the recliner so that her legs dangle over the armrest.

That piques your interest. “Others?”

“Yeah, Alphys, Undyne, Papyrus and Sans.” She pauses for a second, trying gauge your reaction. “And probably now Toriel since you know.” She thumbs at Frisk who groans and walks into a different room which you assume is a kitchen. “They’re coming in through the barrier at the Capitol. I’m not sure when they left, since we’ve got no signal down here. But I figure we’ve got a few hours before they get here.” Aria grins as Frisk walks back into the living room. “But we got here first.” Aria holds her hand up and Frisk bounds over, smashing their hand into Aria’s in a flamboyant high five.

You weight your options. You made a deal with Chara. You were supposed to let them do as they wished without hurting anyone. But it was a snap decision. Could they really be held to their end? You weren’t sure, but if you went back on your end before they did what did that make you?

You decide for now you’ll go with Aria and Frisk. It’s not like Chara can do anything right this second considered you got determination jumped.

“We should keep moving so we can meet up with the others faster. And maybe we should try to stay awake until we find everyone else, just in case.” Frisk suggests, but you can tell they must have similar feelings to Chara about being in this house. They seem to have an air of unease both about you and about staying here.

“Yeah. It’s weird to be here. It hasn’t changed even since I was here.” Aria muses, as they both walk toward the foyer without thinking about it. Aria scoops a discarded bag up, but drops it. Frisk picks it up for her. You grip at your chest, knowing she must still be in a lot of pain and forcing her way through it.

“You were both here?”

“Yeah. It’s where…uh Toriel tried to keep us from going further in the Underground.” Aria shrugs, rounding the corner to the stairs.

Frisk sighs. “She wanted us to stay here so we wouldn’t be killed. But it’s not like that anymore.” Aria runs her hand over Frisk’s head when they reach the bottom. “Yeah, thanks to you.”

Another long, drawn out hallway to a pair of massive stone gates with the same design that decorated the entrance to the Ruins. You suppose it’s appropriate, as Frisk and Aria work to get it open. You try again to see if it’s possible to hear Chara but you can’t.

Not hearing Chara should be a complete relief, a sense of freedom for the small amount of time you have it, a sense of yourself.

But you don’t.

Why?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BONUS  
> This is basically the conversation between Frisk and Aria when they get the house before Chara does;
> 
> Aria: Okay, I need you to tackle Chara when they walk in the door and hold them down. We don't know how bad they are, so go for the knees first. I would do it myself, but I have to do the injection and I should try to not break the stitches.  
> Frisk: I don't know if I can do that, Aria. Won't that hurt Chara?  
> Aria: Nah, if you do it right it's minimal damage.  
> Frisk: How do you know that?  
> Aria: You think this is my first time jumping someone?  
> Frisk: *Panicked noises*


	33. Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I turned the Underground into a tourist location, yay!

Snow.

It drifted down from an unknown source from the ceiling of the mountain, coating the ground evenly in a smooth layer. It was a blessing that the surface was just as snowy, so you were already dressed to handle the weather change.

“How?” You leave out a palm, allowing small flakes the melt into your hand.

Frisk snorts. “Don’t ask. The only answer I’ve ever gotten is magic.”

You have to admit, it’s sort of magical to see snow so undisturbed. The snow where you lived was plowed the second it hits the floor.

It’s an arduous walk through almost a foot of snow, with multiple stops so Aria can catch her breath and make sure she’s not bleeding out from her stitches. Every time she does so, you cringe, feeling pangs of guilt.

“You shouldn’t have come.” Aria pulls her jacket back down after checking the wrapping is still in place. “You’re going to get worse.”

“Huh, that’s weird.” Aria stand up, taking her bag from Frisk. They protest she shouldn’t be carrying it and Aria reluctantly gives it back. “I was about to the say the same thing to you.”

It was starting to get on your nerves that every time you tried to let Aria and Frisk know they shouldn’t be there, Aria would just throw it back in your face. Not that she was wrong, but it wasn’t supposed to happen like this. You were supposed to finally handle this ordeal on your own.

If it weren’t for Frisk, your small arguments with Aria were sure to turn into full blown screaming matches. Tension were too high for regular rationale. But it was like Frisk has a 6th sense to quelling fights, a skill they used far too many time before you reached a large and poorly built gate over a bridge. It was barred off with newer metal pieces with a keep out sign on the other side.

“Mom said she requested the Ruins to be closed off from anyone.” Frisk says, trying to find a place to climb through. You grimace, knowing Chara was right about that. They manage to knock over a piece of wood so there’s enough space for all of you to crawl through one by one.

You can see neat looking clearing, with a small structure near the edge of the forestry.“Hey, it’s Sans’ sentry station!” Frisk runs over to a small building. It looks recently patched up. Frisk jumps back when a white dog pops out from behind the stand. They quickly regain themselves and start interacting. Is Frisk having a conversation with the dog?

You turn to Aria, confused. “Sans’ sentry station?”

Aria shrugs. “I guess? Sans said he worked a bunch off of odd jobs all over the Underground after he stopped working at the lab. I guess sentry was one of them.” You can’t imagine Sans sitting behind a wooden post checking for passerbys as a living compared to what he did now. It seemed like a waste.

“Hey guys!” Frisk trudges over through the snow as fast as their body will go. “We can get a snowmobile to pick us up from here!”

You’ve seen a lot of strange things since monsters came to surface and even more so in the last few months. But nothing tops a large power-puff of a dog in ski gear driving a Christmas themed snowmobile. They mostly yip instead of speak, but Frisk seems to know what’s going on as they usher you into the passenger cart hitched to the back.

“Wow, it sure is different from when I was here.” Aria laughs, leaning back into one on of the seats.

“All of this is new, it wasn’t nearly like this when I was here either.” Frisk explains. “I guess they decided the best thing to do with the underground was to let people visit since it’s so different from the surface. Metatton takes care of most of that stuff.”

“I’m not surprised.” Aria rolls her eyes. “But I guess if they’re doing tourism here, he’s the one to handle it. I just hope everyone who lives down here still isn’t feeling too much pressure.”

“I think its good stimulation to the economy.” Frisk says proudly. You both just stare at them for a second before bursting out in laugher. They frown, clearly wanting to have said something impressive, but they start laughing along anyway. It’s much needed.

You stop when you hear faint music, slowly rising in volume the closer you get to your new destination. Snowdin town, apparently. “Is that Christmas music?” Aria groans as her face wrenches.

“Yes?” Frisk says, cocking their head. “Snowdin’s always been Christmas themed.”

“They have a Christmas themed town? Wait, isn’t that where Sans and Papyrus lived?” You ask. The Underground is so confusing. Aria looks just as confused. “It wasn’t Christmas-y before. It was just a little town.”

Frisk is more accurate than Aria, but not by too much. It’s almost jarringly holiday themed from the red and white directions around with signs to every single building swamped with blaring lights and every decoration you can think of is present. The main strip in lined with kitschy shops and vendors with an unimpressive amount of humans and monsters milling about. The dog pulls over the snowmobile roughly, knocking the three of you around. The bark upon a complete stop and you climb out into a much more manageable amount of snow.

“We’re not going to wait here are we?” You cringe as another jaunty tune blasts through fake rock speakers.

“It’s not that bad.” Frisk tries, they really do. But their attempt is shattered when a monster that looks like some kind of sea plant dressed in a plastic tree suit saunters by. “Never mind.”

Aria glances around the main square, but can’t seem to orient herself. “Frisk, do you remember where Grillby’s is? Maybe we can get a message out to someone to let them know where we are. Because I’m not on enough painkillers for this.”

Grillby’s in the Underground is exactly like the one near the university, except a quite a bit smaller. It’s well-worn and thankfully not Christmas themed. And similarly, there’s a fire monster behind the counter burning bright yellows and red, instead of the ethereal green you’re used to.

“Hey Grillbz! Long time no see!” Frisk runs forward and onto a bar stool, giving the living flame a hug over the counter. You want to tell Frisk to watch out, but they’re not at all engulfed in flames as you expect them to be. You mentally punch yourself for thinking something so rude. Grillbz gives you and Aria a curt nod, but offers no words.

Frisk pulls back, a big smile spread over their face. “Grillbz, do you have any way for us to contact any of our friends? We-“ Aria pulls back on the collar of Frisk’s sweater. “We got separated from them.” She continues, as Frisk gags for a second. “Our phones don’t work down here and we just want to let them know where we are.” Grillbz nods and heads to the back.

“Why didn’t we just say we ‘fell’?” You make air quotes because really you’re the only one who fell.

“Shush. No reason to freak anyone out, right? No one has fallen since Frisk and the fact that anyone can is not exactly a good thing.” Aria says in hushed tone as a human and monster couple walk by, carry out containers in hand.

Grillbz come back out with a huge and ancient looking cell phone. “Oh! Thank you!” Frisk flips the phone around, giving it a slight shake. “Oh. It’s got no battery.”

Frisk jumps up, startling both you and Grillbz. “Oh! Would there be one at Papyrus’ and Sans’ old house?”

“Maybe. Mind if we borrow that Grillbz?” Aria asks, to a slow nod from Grillbz. She and Frisk immediately rush out, while you wait a second to say thank you. It’s hard to tell, but you think Grillbz appreciated that.

“The door’s locked.” The house you were at was set back from the town and significantly larger than any other residences in the area. Despite that, unlit streamer lights dangled from the roof in a slight disarray with snow piled high around the edge.

“Any reason we’re trying to just break in? It doesn’t look like anyone even lives here anymore.” You say, noticing the house has two separate mailboxes, one looking more decrepit than the other. Aria tries her hand at the handle, but just as Frisk already said, it’s locked.

“Shoot. Where else could we find a battery as old as this fossil?” The phone was so large Aria had to hold it with two hands.

“Oh! Wait!” Frisk yelps, and starts digging through Aria’s backpack, tongue sticking out as they felt around. They eventually come back up from the depths with a set of house keys littered with the normal, silly decorations every young teen has. They rifle through their bouquet of keychains until they find a dusty white key.

Frisk raises it in the air like they’ve struck gold. “The key for the shed! It’s where Sans’ workshop was! If there is a battery it’s in there!”

Aria snorts, covering her mouth. “Is that a freaking skeleton key? Like actually made the look like a skeleton? God, Sans is a dork.” You stifle a smile as Frisk stick their tongue out, trying to get your two to follow them around the back. Anything for a joke, you laugh to yourself.

The shed is in the same state as the house, maybe even marginally worse. Frisk jostles with the lock until it clanks open. “Yes!” Frisk practically runs inside when the door creeks open. You follow right after, feeling a little odd about all of this. It was like you were snopping into part of Sans’ past and he didn’t even know you were looking.

“What a mess.” Aria says under her breath while Frisk tries to clear some paper off the lab desk only to rile up a miniature dust storm. Frisk is caught in the storm, but you help wave some of it off with some manila folders you grab from a broken down rolling chair.

Aria is right though. You would never called Sans organized, but this was beyond any mess you’ve seen before. It was almost as if someone had come into the small space just to tear it apart. Blueprints and notes were strewn everywhere, drawers overturned and possible burn marks on the walls and floor. Frisk and Aria were already digging through the mess which you joined, starting at the area closest to the door.

Maybe ten minutes passes with intermittent moments of silence broken by complaining.

“What the…” Aria mumbles after a while, pulling something out of a lower drawer.

“Did you find a battery?” Frisk asks, leaning over her shoulder. “It would be awesome if you did.” You say, already tired of flinging papers around. And half of it was written in a language you couldn’t read so you couldn’t even think to entertain yourself.

“No.” Aria’s voice is hollow, as she pulls out a small glossy square, followed by a dog-eared black leather notebook. “I don’t know what this is.”

“Oh!” Frisk takes the square from between Aria’s fingers as she starts to thumb through the journal. “I know this picture! Wait…why are you and Aria in it?” Frisk passes it off to you. You gingerly take it, more curious than you’ve ever been.

Sure enough, there you are. You’re hanging off one of Sans’ shoulders, Aria standing behind the both of you. There’s a bunch of Aria’s medical school friends in the pictures too and what you believe to be one of Papyrus’ arms off in the corner. You stare at the picture for a long time, drawing a complete blank to when the hell this picture could have been taken. In what world would you and Sans have posed like that together for a picture? Wow. You look really happy, too.

“Frisk.” Aria say quietly, letting the book fall closed. “Sans does remember what happened during resets right?”

“What?” You look up from the picture, gripping it much harder than you had before. Frisk bites down on their bottom lip. “That’s what he told me.”

“I don’t think he can. This journal…it’s filled it broken ideas and scribbles of things that happened from different timelines. They’re not even complete. Chara…come look at this.” Aria thumbs open to a specific page.

You inhale sharply. It looks like madman’s writing with words half-finished and dates completely scrambled. The most jarring thing is your name written over a few times and scratched out with question and exclamation marks dotting the page. Aria’s name is also written, but it’s much less confused and haphazard as yours is.

The most frightening part is that you don’t know which Chara it refers to.

Aria plucks the picture from you. “Chara. Do you know when this picture is from?”

“No. I can’t remember being in a picture like that.”

“It’s from Manny’s party. Back at the start of the school year.”

“Okay, I know I was drunk, but I think I would remember doing that. Plus, Sans hated me then.” You argue. There was no way.

“Except it is. I remember wearing that.” Aria drag her finger over the glossy material. “But I don’t remember taking this picture either.”

Frisk slams their hands together and then over their mouth. They’re shaking. That’s not good. “Aria, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Chara. We’ve been reset.”

You can hear blood rushing through your ears. “What?” You meant to say it louder, but it’s barely audible.

“That’s the only way this makes sense. Frisk, when did you see this?” Aria’s voice is almost deadpan.

They hesitate. “I saw it right before the barrier was broken. When I was down here alone.”

“Fuck!” Aria throws the journal on the ground, landing with an anticlimactic plop. “How did this happen? What the hell happened that we got reset? Frisk!” She whips around.

“It wasn’t me! At least…” You’re trying not to panic as Frisk attempts to find their words. “I don’t think it was. I can usually remember if it’s a long time!” Frisk is almost pleading, but there’s no way they would lie about something like this. Aria storms further into the lab, knocking down a tarp off a large machine.

“Oh my god.” You run up to it, putting your hands to the metal. Shaped like a telephone booth. An identical one in Sans’ lab, except this one is a deep steel blue instead of dark green. “This is the same as the machine I tried to destroy the first time I blacked out, when I got hurt.”

“What?” Aria and Frisk say at the same time. “Holy shit, your right.” Aria examines the machine over you. “I’ve seen that piece of junk in his lab.” You push the door open. More notes and papers are strewn inside.

“This is how he remembers.” You say just so Aria can hear. Frisk is still standing in the middle of the room, frustrated and digging through their own memories, stress clear on their face. “If he doesn’t remember the way Frisk said he does, he must have been using this machine. That’s why we has the same on the surface. In case we were…reset.” It hurts to say the words. You still didn’t completely understand what resets were about, but now that they were part of your reality they were much more terrifying. “That’s why Chara wanted to destroy it. They knew.”

“I wonder…if that’s why Sans thought you were Chara right off the bat. From fragments of a timeline we all forgot, and he just made the assumption…what the hell happened in that timeline?” Aria put her hand to her head, starting to lose composure.

“Guys,” Frisk links walks over and link onto your arm. “If it wasn’t me who reset, then who did it?” You press yourself against them for some kind of stability.

Aria shakes her head. “I have no idea. But I for some reason, I think we’re headed down a similar path. We need to get the hell out of the Underground.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me, connecting FREAKING EVERYTHING IN THIS STORY  
> IT'S VERY EXHAUSTING 
> 
> Plus, dogs on snowmobiles.


	34. Flowey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess you guys called it!
> 
> Or did you?

Without any wind chill, it’s not so horrible to be standing outside.

You can hear Aria and Frisk continuing the hunt for a battery for the oldest cell phone in existence after everyone had calmed down a bit. You needed to take a breather from all the excitement plus your little treasure hunt has kicked up so much dust you thought you were going to choke to death.

You were afraid but of what, you weren’t sure. You still didn’t fully comprehend what it meant to ‘reset’. Obviously there was a beginning to start from but where, or rather, when, was that? According to Frisk and the picture you managed to sneak out without anyone noticing, it would return to Frisk being a child, a time before monsters were on the surface. How many times did you relive your life exactly the same without knowing it?

What happened to cause a reset? Was it bad enough for Frisk to recant their promise to never reset again? Was it even them?

The thing that was bothering you the most was how freaking happy everyone looks in this stupid picture! You pull at it, angry that you feel can barely remember what happy should feel like. Did Sans not care what you were then? Unless…

He never knew, did he? At least not the first time around. He knew the other Chara was in your soul based on his notes and from whatever he did remember, if anything. Could he even feel the difference in your souls? Could anyone besides Frisk?

You press your hand to you head, shoving the picture into your pocket. You hear it crinkle against your fist, which makes you feel a little bad. It’s not yours to damage. Your extremely frustrated and just hurts to think so you try and walk it off into the trees. You’ll come back to the shed in a bit once you’ve cooled off.

Before you realize it, you’re in a fair sized clearing past the wintery foliage. Shit, you’d walked further than you meant to. As you start to turn back, something rustles behind you.

“Howdy!”

A flower, somewhere between a daisy and a sunflower bobs from a snow-less patch of dirt, says in a cartoony voice.

You watch the flower for a second, something niggling at the back of your mind. But you can’t place why you feel reserved. “Uh, hi.”

“Don’t see many humans around this area. Are you lost?” They grin innocently, but it just makes you feel uncomfortable. You shake your head slowly. “No. I can get back, thanks.”

They seem to mull that over for a second. “You should head back before something bad happens.” Their grin widens. You don’t have to be told twice to get out of there.

“Chara!” Frisk is calling for you. “Chara, are you around here? We found a battery!”

You’re about to call back when you catch sight of the flower, stem completely straight, eyes wide.

“You’re Chara?” They hiss, face shifting into darkness. All of the color drains from your face. Oh god.

It’s Flowey.

You really wished someone had reminded you Flowey was a damn flower. You immediately start to mentally call for Chara, but it’s still too soon since the determination injection.

“Chara?” Frisk slips past two thick tree trunks, looking glad to have found you. But they freeze when they see Flowey. “What are you doing here?” Frisk asks, voice quiet.

“I was just staying out of everyone’s way, just like I should.” A twisted grin forms over Flowey’s face. “But it looks like someone else just doesn’t know when to quit. I forgot what Chara’s new host looked like for a second there.” Flowey turns to you, small fangs started to bleed out from his mouth. “So who are you now? I’ll guess the surface human, except you’re not really as psychotic as last time.” Flowey laughs at his own observations.

“What?” Your voice breaks. You should be running, but you still have your end of the deal to uphold. Except Chara isn’t here right now.

“Sure. Chara drove you completely insane by the time you got down here last time. Any time you were…well this you.” Flowey motions to you up and down with a leaf that somehow functioned like arms. “You were a complete nonsensical mess. Screaming, crying, you could barely function.”

You feel fear rip through the souls of your feet, up through your spine straight into your head. Whatever happened last time was worse than whatever happened now. Much worse.

You can see long, deep green vines start to snake up around Flowey. You think you hear Frisk yell for him to stop and for you to run, but you’re frozen. You can’t grasp everything thats happening around you.

Flowey’s vines dip low for a second. “Even if it’s not the same as last time, I might as well put a stop to this now. Don’t want a repeat of last time.” He cackles as you’re pulled up by one ankle into the air as you scream bloody murder. The force is so strong, you think for a second he snapped your ankle, but that will be the least of your problems as more vines crawl towards you.

“Flowey, stop!” Frisk lunges into the clearing, red soul shimmering in front of them. You panic for them, because how to they plan to do anything. Then you see it.

A knife.

Frisk’s unsteady with it, as you watch it flash past one of Flowey’s petals. Despite Frisk’s discomfort using the weapon, you can see the fear in Flowey. You want to tell Frisk to get away, but another thick vine is already working its way around your throat. When you look up again from trying to protect your neck, Flowey is at least quadruple the size he was before, trying to knock Frisk back.

“Let her go! I don’t want to fight!” Frisk yells, missing another dig at Flowey. You can see Flowey’s mouth pull apart pulled into a mocking sneer. “Of course you don’t! But this is a favor to you, you know?” Flowey’s conversation is cut short with a boom of pain. Frisk must have hit them.

The vines untangle around you, but you hit the ground before you get a chance to thank the stars that the vines were moving at a snail’s pace.  

Could you count this as falling, again? Probably not since you’d be dropped, but you’ll add it to the count regardless.

You may be free, but now Flowey has Frisk in a mesh work of vines. The knife is neatly placed on top a roll of fresh snow, waiting. You ignore the throbbing all over and rush towards it. You manage to get to it before Flowey realizes you’re out of his grasp.

“Drop them!” You yell, pointing the knife in Flowey’s direction. Your hand is visibly shaking, and your voice is just a touch raspy from the start of being strangled. You can feel the pull of your soul as it leaves your body, still black as the night is dark. You don’t want to do this. But you have to do something.

Flowey watches studies you once again followed by guttural laughter. “You may not be insane, but your soul is just as disgusting as it was back then. But you have no idea how to utilize LV. I’m not afraid of a human like you.”

Vines move like bullets, much faster than when Frisk was trying to stop Flowey. But they miss. Was Flowey’s aim that bad? No, you were just able to see them as if they were moving in slow motion. It’s an odd sensation, but you don’t have time to worry about it. You need to help Frisk.

The only thing running in your head was to get to the main stem. Even if Flowey is technically a monster, he’s still a plant. You can only pray that biology still applies to this type of flower. You can hear Flowey roar above you with each strike that misses you until you get to the deep green of Flowey’s stem.

You shouldn’t have gotten here as unscathed as had, but you weren’t complaining. You wind back, using as much force as you can to slice through Flowey’s stem. It’s not as deep as you hoped, but it’s enough to send him reeling back. You hear the deep thud of Frisk hitting the snow as Flowey retracts.

“Frisk!” You try to run over, but it’s more a garbled stumble as you work your way to Frisk. You can see them looking up and around, dazed, but mostly unhurt. You’re within reach when a sharp pain burns into your side, sending you flying into Frisk. You both tumble and slide against the snow, groaning in pain when you finally hit a tree, ending your course.

“IDIOTS! Just let this end!” Flowey screeches, poised to attack. You jump over Frisk, covering them with your body. But the attack never comes.

Flowey is instead locked in place, glowing in blue.

“You never do learn, huh?” Sans stand at the edge of the clearing, one hand out. With every pulsation of magic crackling through the air, Flowey’s enormous size diminishes until he’s back to his original size.

“I’m not the one you should be restraining, trash.” Flowey strains to say, trying to move against the force of Sans’ magic. You wonder what Flowey means, but it’s clear that he was using you as a distraction when Sans whips his head in your direction. There’s a moment of hesitation as you sit in the snow with Frisk holding your breath.

Flowey laughs, able to wiggle while Sans is distracted. “Still as stupid as ever! You’ll regret not letting me kill Chara!” He slips into the ground without a trace.

Eerie silence fills the space. Why was Chara so hell bent on finding someone who wants them dead?

“Are you two okay?” Sans stands in front of the mess of you and Frisk, features even. You both nod, helping each other up. You quickly slip the knife into the same pocket as the picture, hoping no one saw you do it. You don’t know what you have done if Frisk got hurt because of you. “That’s good.” Sans nods to himself before, for the first time ever, he becomes visibly angry.

“Chara, what the fuck is wrong with you?” His voice is just a touch above his normal tone, but you take it as yelling. “Aria said you came here of your own free will? What the hell were you thinking?”

Of course they would calls Sans first. He can do the shortcut thing. But this is really not what you need right now. You choose not to answer in lieu of getting yelled at. You start to trudge up back through the trees without saying anything.

“Hey,” Sans follows behind, letting Frisk ride on his back. Frisk wasn’t hurt, they just wanted to and it made them feel better. “I’m talking to you. You almost got yourself and Frisk killed back there.”

“Yeah well,” You growl, pulling your feet through the snow. “I didn’t ask for anyone to come find me! I would have been fine!”

You hear Sans scoff. “Oh yeah, you totally had everything under control back there.” Sans shrugs Frisk off at their request as they decide to run ahead. Clearly not the type of kid who enjoys situations like this. “Chara, we’re just trying to help.”

You spin in the snow, happy to not lose your balance. “All I’ve done is create more problems for everyone! I don’t anyone’s help anymore! And I especially don’t want your help! You’re half the reason I’m in this mess! If you had just left me alone I might not have able been able to work in the lab and had no access to LV!” You stomp in the snow, watching Sans face unravel. “And I know about the reset! I know you knew who I was ahead of time!”

“Then you should have figured out already that in the old timeline you got the lab position on your own.” Sans says flatly. “Since you already dug through all my shit. I can only remember what I can remember.”

Oh. Maybe you are being a little hard to handle right now. Sans grabs the crook of your elbow and leads you toward the shed. “We’re going back to the capitol and leaving.”

“Aria! Frisk!” Sans calls out in the quiet snow, still keeping his death grip on you. “We’re leaving.” He says and they both bound over from the shed. Aria and Frisk both settle around Sans, giving you sympathetic looks before magic begins to lightly crackle around the four of you.

“Make sure to hold tight, don’t want to lose anyone on the way over. Don’t know where you’ll fall. And since I’ve got a bus load, I won’t be able to get you for a while if you do fall. Got it?” You can see all parties nod their head.

_What do you think you’re doing? Get out._

You can feel Sans grip slightly loosen around your arm as Chara’s voice fills your head. They must have just woken up.

_We have a deal. If I had been myself I would have prevented such an outcome with Flowey. I can assure you we will not be attacked again. And if we are, I will take incapacitate Flowey myself. But is a deal is a deal and if you do not hold up your end, I am in no obligation to hold up mine._

You can feel a familiar sense of magic about to pull you through to a new location. In the last second you rip your arm from Sans’ hand. He sees you do it and is about to reach for you and shout but they’re already gone in a burst of light.

Realization washes over you with as a blanket of dread. “What did I just do…” You stand alone behind Sans’ and Papyrus’ old home. You did was Chara said without question. Did you trust them that much?

Or was it because of Sans?

You shake your head. It didn’t matter. You wanted this from the start. No one can be hurt this way.

_Hmm. I was not sure you would do it. Never the less, let us continue. Flowey is no longer in Snowdin unfortunately. We should get moving. And move quickly, he’ll return soon to look for us I’m sure._

“Right.” Your head is all over the place. At this point it’s just easier to let Chara take the lead.

You take off down the poorly paved road to who knows where.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Waterfall! Waterfall!


	35. Intent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! 
> 
> CHECK OUT THE TUMBLR BECAUSE I'M DUMB AND [DREW A THING](http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/post/138393852379/someone-wanted-to-know-what-happened-after-they?is_related_post=1)  
> And also find out why [writing is and will be somewhat delayed](http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/post/138248099429/sorry-all-it-may-be-a-few-days-until-the-next#notes)

You’re relieved when you hit solid ground again, pulling away from the slushy banks of Snowdin. You have to slow to a walking pace as you start over a heavily reinforced bridge above a dark waterfall. There’s a couple humans and monsters taking pictures while another dog driven snowmobile putters at the sentry station you passed earlier. It’s almost as empty as Snowdin, if not more so.

“What is this place?” You say just above a whisper. You didn’t need strangers watching you talk to yourself.

_Waterfall. Maybe you have yet to figure it out, but the old king was not very apt at naming locations._

“You mean Asgore?” You don’t have time to stop and admire the grandiosity of wild water smashing into a darkened abyss below. 

_I don’t. We can discuss this another time, but for now we must keep moving. Did you tire out that quickly?_

“I don’t do a lot of running, okay?” Recently you had been running a lot. But not exactly for fitness purposes. Besides, Chara should know you’d be found again eventually. As much as you would have liked to believe no one was going to find you, Mt. Ebott was clearly the first and only place you’d go.

Maybe on some level you had tipped the peak of insanity. You didn’t feel crazy, but your actions might be seen that way. You were taking directions from a sociopathic demon child and actively trying to elude the people who wanted to help. Well, trying to help.

_Just keep moving. And please try to not step on the echo flowers. They may let us know if someone is coming, or has already been here._

A high pitched voice resonates from around your feet, causing you to jump back. You can see the sway of a shining blue flower, bobbing along with the words it hums. It sounds like a child asking something, but the message dissolves into laughter.

“Echo flowers, huh?” You stroke the silky petals as it repeats your words back at you, higher and quicker.

_Stop messing around._

You stand up, hissing through your teeth. “Alright, bossy.” You mean to start at a light jog, but traveling through Waterfall is like running through the night. For every part of Snowdin that is like the surface, Waterfall is not. Black, brackish water laps at the stakes the bridge you’re walking on, glistening stones dotting the cavern roof like stars. It sends a slight chill through you, thinking about how much the Underground attempts to be like the surface.

But it isn’t. And it could never be. A world where night and winter can last forever.

It was beautiful but you could see why the monsters wanted to see the sun so much.

“How are we going to find Flowey, exactly? He didn’t seem particular excited to see me. Actually, it was you.” You shove your hands into your pocket, almost hitting the sharp edge of the blade. You forgot it was there. You brush up against the photo, a spark of resentment reaching the tips of your fingers.

_Whether he likes it or not, Flowey has a natural propensity to my location and vice versa. We have to get close, but once we do he will be sure to reveal himself. And like I’ve said, I can handle the situation._

You’re not so sure about that. Guilt creeps into your chest. You’re just dragging everyone down further, so despite your fear you have to keep going.

The ground beneath your feet beings to illuminate, but the source is a bit beyond you. The water before you glows with a bioluminescence like you’ve never seen before. Your pace slows as you try to mentally process the sheer extravagance of it all.

“You won’t get away with this.”

You stumble back, having almost stomped on yet another echo flower. “You won’t get away with this.” It bleats, the sound foreign but the voice familiar. There’s a deep threat in there.

_That was faster than expected._

You nod to someone who can’t see it. You cautiously continue on, greeting by exactly what you expect.

Sans is leaning against a telescope viewing station manned by an elderly turtle man. They’re making light banter, considering the slow pace business seems to be going. Sans looks over his shoulder, promptly ending his conversation with the jovial senior.

Sans saunters over. “You got me good Chara.” Sans walks over shrugging his arms and shoulders. “First the thing with Papyrus, then the thing back and Snowdin. You’d think by now I’d be able to hear the _hiss_ of a _copycat_.”

It takes you a second to figure out what was Sans is talking about. That’s right. Chara can throw their voice to sound like you. And Sans thought it was Chara, not you, that pushed away from him in Snowdin. You try to keep your face as even as possible. “But this ends here.”

If Chara can sound like you, why not the other way around?

“And now why would Chara even want to go with you or return to surface. Let us be honest. Are you not half the problem?” Your voice comes out smooth, but you’re completely panicking inside. Not to mention as soon as you started talking Chara absolutely lost it and it’s hard to concentrate with unstoppable cackling happening in your head.

Sans gaze darkens. Don’t be scare, don’t be scared, you chant to yourself. “You existence is the whole problem. I made mistakes this time, but at least Chara made is past Christmas.”

“What?” Your voice breaks. Sans cocks and brow bone. You have to maintain. “You can blame me all you want. But Chara’s already agreed to do this. Just go back to the surface with everyone else.”

Alright, you’re not doing as good as a job as you were before. You see the suspicion on Sans’ face. Time to try a new angle.

“You think you’ve got me figured out.” You use your regular tone again, rounding Sans. You want a clear view of the path ahead.

Confusion twists into Sans’ face. “Chara?”

You click your tongue against you teeth. “I’m so sick of this. You always act like you know what’s going on, but you can’t even tell the difference between me,” You pull your hand down from your head and out. “And Chara.” You motion towards your head.

 _How interesting_. You can hear Chara echo in your head.

“Shut up.” You whisper. You don’t really need the encouragement. Sans is still just watching you. You can see the upset etched into his face that it was you who pushed him away.

“Did you know this entire time, Chara hasn’t been out. Not when I was alone, not with Aria and Frisk, and not with you.” You pace around, just talking to fill the silence. “And yet everything is still a secret. I mean, this entire time our timeline was already reset. And you never said anything. You just let us keep going forward acting like you know everything, just like always. I know about resets. Frisk can do them! Why not just tell us!” You throw your hands up.

“And why!” You yank the photo from your pocket, shoving it into Sans’ face. You’re close enough for him to grab you but he doesn’t move an inch. “What is this!?” You plucks it from your grasp, as you take a few steps back, safely out of reach.

“What exactly…” You start to growl but Sans interrupts.

“Friends.” He says flatly.

“What?”

“We were just friends in that timeline. Nothing else, as far as I can remember. You deteriorated too quickly for anything to happen even if it was possible. At one point then, I hoped it would be.” It feels like Sans is staring right through you as you keep a hard look pressed into your features.

You’re almost afraid to ask, but you have to. “Flowey said something similar. What happened?”

“It’s fuzzy.” Sans sighs. “But I think we assumed you would be okay since you had Chara inside you for so long without any issues before you started at the lab. We never knew about the liquid LV the first time around. It was probably started about two weeks after we took this picture.”

Sans waits a while before continuing. He quietly contemplates while giving the photo multiple glances. “You would forget where you were. Forget how you got somewhere. Lost track of days. That was just the start.”

Both you and Chara are intently listening. “Do you know this?” You ask softly, as Sans takes another pause.

 _No. I do not remember such a reset._ You can tell that’s the truth.

“I tried to write down what I could remember. But I know you would break down in tears, screaming. You would break things and hurt yourself in fits of rage without a reason and at random. It was then we realized Chara was slowly tearing you apart from the inside out. I guess they took the opposite route this time around.” Sans makes a noise that is almost a laugh but not quite. “I can’t remember who was killed that time line. Guess I don’t want to. Then it all just…ended. Wasn’t sure we’d ever get this far again after that.”

_It is possible that is a true story. But only Flowey will know. It seems he remembers that timeline well. I will make sure you know the entire truth. I am curious as well._

It’s a tempting offer, and you still have a deal to uphold. “I’m not going with you. I’m finishing what I started.”

“Chara, this isn’t about you anymore.” Sans voice drops, rumbling with the anger from earlier. “If it was just you, or just me, maybe there would be some kind of choice here. But it’s not. Other people are going to be hurt. Or worse.”

You hold your ground. “No.”

Sans puts his hands up. “Fine.” You’re already ready to argue, so this is a sizable surprise. You’re uncertain he means it.

“I’ll let you go and do what you came here for.” Sans holds up a couple of skeletal fingers, letting his other hand fall into the pocket of his coat. “But on two conditions. One, you leave Frisk and Aria out of this. They’re both looking for you, but I won’t let them be hurt because this is your choice.”

The words sting as they come out of Sans’ mouth. But he’s right. You’ve already injured Aria once and almost caused Frisk to be hurt earlier, but that was your whole reason for coming into the Underground alone. You wait for Chara to agree before you do.

“Good. Second, you’ll be judged like any other fallen human.”

You feel Chara shake. You have a vague idea of what that means. “Judged?”

“Yep. Normally, only humans with pure souls get to see the king but we can’t use those rules anymore. But we’ll change the rules a little. If you get past me by the feeling in your soul you can go back the surface as whoever, or whatever you are by then. That goes more for the other Chara than anything else, really.”

You don’t move. You remember what Aria told your about her death as a fallen human. You remember Sans had to ‘stop’ Frisk in other timelines. It was a terrifying gesture.

_He cannot be serious. He thinks he would have any ability to stop me now? I mean, us. To stop both our goals._

“What do you mean, whatever I am by then?” You breathe out. You can hear Chara trying to save the situation but you’re not listening.  

“You may not be human by the time you’re through. You won’t be a monster either. You could be something different all together. Something worse.” There’s no amusement in Sans’ face. There’s only the long lines of a frown and a hint of hoping. Under any other circumstance you might think it was a threat. But it isn’t. “Chara, I would rather not do this at all. I would rather keep trying to figure out another way. But I won’t stop you anymore if this what _you_ want. But you need to know what the consequences are of going through with this.” Sans rubs a hand over his face, pleading to you.

“Still want to go through with it?”

You hesitate. No. Chara promised to not hurt anyone as long as you did this. They’d been good so far, and you couldn’t see a way for them to go back on it.

“I’m going to finish what I started.” You repeat.

Sans lets out another exasperated sigh. “I hope for both of our sakes this ends up differently than I think it might. I’m sorry.”

Sans shakes his head before a flash of white takes him away.

You stand in silence, alone.

Holy shit, he was actually going to let you do this.

_That was much easier than I thought it would be. Looks like he’s taking an old approach to a new game, hmm? He is just the kind to sit back._

You don’t like Chara’s tone, but you’re already in so deep you aren’t sure you’ll ever come back for air. There’s nothing to do except keep walking.

Chara directs you off the beaten path with vigor, as you watch beads of light float up from the mystical water. As amazing as is it, you’re worried it’s not exactly safe if you were to fall in.

Through scream through your mind. Was this really the right choice? Were you really doing this for the greater good of everyone you’d already hurt, everyone’s whose lives you spun into turmoil?

You think Chara’s excitement amount this path was all for nothing, until you see an overgrowth of golden flowers which made their way up part of the wall like vines on a trellis. In the center Flowey is slumped over and sickly, petals wilted slightly. He catches sight of you and releases of sigh or disappointment.

“You must really be an idiot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what was up with the cat jokes. I just like cats. 
> 
> Also, I really hope that didn't come off as Sans actively threatening Chara. He's just telling her if things go sour he has to stop whatever that would kill everyone. 
> 
> But get ready because who knows what's going to happen next!!  
> (Hope you're ready)


	36. Offering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY CLIMAX ARC
> 
> Thank you guys so much for your well wishes! I'm basically better, but this week was just hell in a hand basket.  
> I dislike making you guys wait as much as you dislike waiting.
> 
> But here it is!
> 
> Thanks to [shizukopride](http://shizukopride.tumblr.com/) for editing this! I needed it haha

 You don’t know exactly why but you’re standing in front of Flowey once again.  

Flowey sighs deeply, dropping over the bed of golden flowers which bare an uncanny resemblance to him. He’s somewhat wilted over which strikes you as strange. He barely contrasts against the dark earth of waterfall.

He almost seems…sick.

On your own, you would have already hightailed it out of there regardless of how curious you were, but Chara ensures that won’t be the case when they take over with minimal effort.

“Are you not happy to see me, Flowey? I have been working my hardest for months to return to the underground to see you again.” There was nothing endearing about the words coming out from your mouth from Chara. “And you greet my host by trying to destroy them. I would have thought you would be ecstatic.”

Flowey doesn’t look up. “You really don’t remember that reset, do you?” His breathing is labored and even from inside you can tell something’s wrong.

“What is wrong with you?” Chara crosses their arms over their chest, clearly unhappy both with Flowey’s current state and his response.

He lets out a strained laugh. “Seems like your little host can use a knife just as well as you can.” Flowey straightens out slightly, revealing a nasty gash across his thin stem. You cringe. You only did what you had to, but you still felt a pang of guilt for hurting anyone. “I’m surprised you let yourselves overlap so much.”

You can feel Chara twist your features into a grimace. “What are you implying, exactly?”

“No one can read you better than I can, and the last time you were here there was a clear line between your soul and hers.” Flowey’s mouth twists into a mocking smile. “But there seems to be some bleeding over this time around. Sure took you a lot longer to get here.”

You question what that means from the inside, but it seems Chara is just as uninformed as you are. Flowey notices the confusion, and laughs.

“You mean neither of you recognized that? Can’t you tell that your personalities and actions have changed? I don’t know the surface Chara at all, but I know you’ve never let anyone read your emotions so easily. And now I can tell exactly what you’re thinking without batting an eye.”

You shudder as Flowey speaks. Wearing your heart on your sleeve. That’s your quality. You’re not very good at hiding how you feel through your expressions, and back when Chara first appeared…they were almost stoic, uncaring and even tempered. Now they were explosive and did things like laugh without regard.

And you…were much less passive than you used to be. People used to interrupt and talk over you all the time, and you severely disliked confrontation. You never thought they were bad qualities, but it had never occurred to you before the last few months that you wanted to change any of that.  

What it really Chara’s influence or was it you?

You can tell Chara’s having the same internal struggle as you. They’re probably extremely displeased with something like this.

“Enough!” You slam your hands over your ears to muffle Chara’s shouting. “I’m not here for your speculations. I’m here to correct a grave mistake from a long time ago.”

Flowey finally makes direct eye contact. “Not this again.”

“Going to the surface in the state you were in after I died was a mistake. Asriel’s soul was still weak and mourning. There was no way we could destroy the humans in such a way. My intentions were not to have you killed.” Chara continues on, completely ignoring Flowey’s comment. “But we can do it correctly this time. You should not have had to die at the hands of such disgusting creatures.”

Flowey shakes his head, petals dragging along with him. “Chara.”

“We can restore our form together and make up for all the time we’ve lost! I almost destroyed my own soul moving from Frisk to another human for this!” Chara laughs darkly. Oh. No wonder they were so quiet for so long.

“And this human’s soul will serve us well to provide you with the power you need.” You feel a hand fall over your chest.

Everything stops for just a second. A bolt of terror strikes through you. Did they mean your soul? You bang through the darkness on the inside, pleading for an answer. You’re terrified of what that means.

Chara pulls at your chest, letting out a strained cough as you continue to pound away. “What are you upset about? Chara, you will be part of the most powerful creature in the world. Besides,” Chara chuckles softly, “our little deal never included your self-preservation.”

You want to say the emotion you feel is panic, but it’s so far beyond that. This was always part of the plan. Your soul was always disposable to Chara. You thought maybe there was a chance things were changing, that you were getting along. But nothing could be further from the truth.

In your desperation you’d agreed to your own death.

“Once we join together with Flowey again, I will not be just Chara anymore. Only Chara agreed to not harm anyone.” Their laugh echoes all around you, shaking you to your core, mocking every cell in your body.

Now you’ll cause everyone else’s deaths too.

“Chara.” For a moment you’ve forgotten Flowey’s presence. He looks unimpressed and unperturbed like he expected nothing less. “I already know all of this. My answer was no the first time and it’s still no.”

Chara halts. “What?” You’ve felt a similar feeling emanating from Chara. They’re trying to suppress a bout of rage. “What do you mean ‘no’? This is what we have always wanted.” Their voice shakes despite their attempt to keep even. “I did all of this for you. For both of us. To take revenge on the humans who destroyed everything, who killed you and destroyed our family! To end all of humanity!”

“The only human who killed me was you,” Flowey states without batting an eye. “Even now you still think it was a bunch of terrified, weak humans who ended Asriel’s life? Who broke our family apart? If you don’t think that was your fault, you’re delusional. Thought maybe you'd learn after all this time.”

Chara takes a ragged step forward. “Have you gone insane without your soul?”

Flowey scoffs, bearing sharpened fangs and glaring eyes. “If you hadn’t been so hell-bent on your own goals you wouldn’t have dragged me down with you. No one told you to eat a bunch of poisonous flowers to turn us into that disgusting creature. You probably tricked this human just the same way you tricked Asriel. The same way you tricked me.” Flowey chuckles to himself. “I have no intention of ever giving you any satisfaction anymore.”

You grip at your throat. Chara’s anger is slowly choking you, depriving you of the outside. You can still breathe, but the pain is still there. It ebbs after a few torturous seconds as Chara calms themselves down.

“I won’t fall for such a pathetic ploy.” Chara shakes their head continuing to head towards Flowey. “The only reason you say that is because you still have no soul. Once you receive Chara’s soul, you’ll return to your senses as Asriel and we can be as great as we once were.”

“Wrong again.” Flowey smirks. A dull blob of weak white light pulsates before him. “Humans being in the underground let me collect little shards of souls to rebuild. Who knew, huh? Humans sure are careless.” Flowey shakes his head, looking pleased with himself. “Didn’t even have to steal it. They would just fight or be sad and boom, a little bit of soul for me.”

Despite Flowey’s proclamation, his stitched together soul is still barely glowing and honestly kind of pitiful looking. It’s barely a fragment of a soul, even you can feel that. But it does make sense. If a soul can be damaged, why can’t a few pieces be lost in the process?

But what you feel more than anything is Chara about to completely lose it. Tremors shake you, knocking around your consciousness, filling the space with heated anger.

“You ungrateful…” Chara steps forward, reaching deliberately into your coat pocket. “Delusional, pathetic excuse for Asriel.” Flowey flinches when Chara pulls out the knife. “If you refuse me again I will not hesitate to destroy you.”   

“You must be stupid. You’ll never be the Chara I grew up with. Go back to hell,” Flowey spits.

The second Chara lunges forward an ear-splitting crack reverberates from every direction giving you only a second to react. It sounds like the shattering of glass hitting the floor and splaying into a thousand pieces.

The next few seconds is a dizzying blur as you hit the ground, the knife tumbling to the dampened ground. You lay there for a few seconds before realizing you’re in control again.

It takes another second for you to scramble away from Flowey.

“Huh.” He cocks his head. “Thought I was dead for sure this time.”

“What?” You pick the knife back up, hands still shaking with Chara’s residual effect on your body. “Did…did you know this was going to happen?” You ask.

“Not this way.” Flowey shrinks down for just a second, wrenching in pain but regaining himself after a few moments. “Chara still attacked me but I was in much better condition to hold them off until Chara couldn’t keep hold of your form. Though you’re much more coherent this time.”

You sink to the ground, letting your hands hit the floor as you sit, but not releasing the knife. “What happened to me then and why didn’t it happen this time?”

Flowey shrugs. “If I remember it right, Chara made you go insane quietly until almost everything that made you human was gone. Chara has no problem controlling someone who had absolutely no control over themselves. It probably would have gone the same this time, but I’m guessing that smiley…Sans had an idea of what was going on this time. His influence tends to alter timelines.” He muses. “Chara said you killed a lot of people and monsters before you came to find me.”

You shudder. “Me or Chara?”

“I don’t know the details. At that point, I wouldn’t put it past both.”

“Do you…know who?”

Flowey hums in thought. “Alphys for sure, a bunch of surface monsters, some people you live with? Oh, and Frisk? They were badly injured. If you didn’t reset, they probably would have died.”

“Wait!” You shout, startling Flowey. “What did you just say?”

“You almost killed Frisk?”

“No! The other thing!” You’re up on your knees now, shuffling forward. You want to react to the fact you killed your own friends, but your mind only had one focus. “You said I reset?”

“Oh. That. Well you can’t reset on your own like Frisk can, but I have the ability to let someone else do it. I can’t use it without a full soul. I just offered it to you and you took it.” Flowey smirks, twisting a short vine to his height.

At first, you think he may attack you again but rather than launch an assault, the vine burrows beneath the black ground. It digs around like pulsating blood vessels, outlining some type of figure with exacting speed. The ground slowly raises, forming a bar of earth, the word ‘reset’ etched into it. With a final flick before removing the vine, the lines illuminate in a deep golden color.

“You were desperate before, practically begging me to stop everything. Killing you would have done no good but there’s always a chance to try again. I guess I owe you, so if you want to, you can.”

You stare at the ground as it shimmers in its own magical light. So you were the one who reset. From what it sounded like, you weren’t even you anymore. You were nothing but a shell with a soul, exactly what Chara wanted. You suppose no one would have blamed you back then considering how many lives…were taken. What a mess you were. How much of that world had been broken?

But what about this world? Was this one worth ending to start over new? The reset changed enough that your sanity had been saved and no one had died, but that didn’t mean it was anywhere near perfect. Chara was still within you, waiting to do who knows what.

You have no way of knowing what future you’ll have, but you know you want to see it someday.

“Thank you, Flowey.” You stand up, taking a step back from the reset. “But I don’t think I’m going to need this.” You give a soft smile as the raised floor begins to sink back from its original location.

“Suit yourself.” Flowey returns to his hunched over position in the flowers, breathing somewhat shallowly. You watch silently for a second before you realize Flowey is eyeing you back.

“What are you looking at? Don’t you want to leave already? Fix your little problem?” Flowey smirks, but his eyes are downcast.

You’re done biting for bait out of curiosity. That’s gotten you in more trouble than anything else. “Are you really okay? You’ve helped me before. I could at least return the favor.”

Flowey scoffs at your offer, but you aren’t offended. “Even if there was something wrong, which there isn’t, you couldn’t do anything about it.”

“Alright.” You don’t believe Flowey. At the same time, you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. You start to leave but Flowey stops you when he calls your name.

“I forgot to ask, you and my Chara really are related?” His eyes are a little wider than before, peaked with green. Maybe in another life he would look almost innocent. You nod quickly.

“Ah.” Flowey takes a second to process that. “Makes sense. Your souls are pretty similar. Would have been nice if you were the Chara who fell.”

“Maybe.” You let your mouth pull into a small smile. Flowey shakes off the moment, scowling again.

“Why are you still here? Get the hell out of here.”

You don’t need to be told twice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter theme: Flowey's done with Chara's shit.
> 
>  


	37. True

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All hell broke loose in real life, sorry for making you guys wait.

You hadn’t heard Chara in almost two hours.

Or rather you guestimated it had been two hours after aimless wandering around Waterfall’s bioluminescent rivers and humming echo flowers. The novelty had worn off. You just wanted to be out of here already.

Despite your newfound distain, you called out to Chara multiple times for help or at least a hint on how to get the hell out of this swampy maze. You seethed with anger as you tried to get them to respond. You really were nothing to them, and they were going to sacrifice you like you were nothing. They deserved to never have a voice again, you think as you grit your teeth.

You call again, to no avail. You know they’re still there, but Chara seems to be unreachable for now.

To be fair, you had no idea how long you’ve been awake. If you let yourself, you could probably pass out just about anywhere at this point. You know from any experience with Chara that blacking out does not equal sleeping. It had been night when you arrived. Who knows how long it had been since then.

“Are…are you lost?” A timid voice weakly makes itself known. You wobble when you try to turn to get a good look at the source.

You want to laugh, but you’re aware enough to know that’s not good social etiquette; plus you’re too tired. A monster which bears a striking resemblance to a cheesy sheeted Halloween costume of a ghost. They won’t make eye contact with you, looking bashful.

“Oh…I’m very sorry…I didn’t…” The ghost starts to whimper while floating backwards. “You probably don’t need my help…” They sniffle, tears forming at the base of their eyes.

“Wait! I do!” You call, startling them. They blink back a few watery droplets. “I’m really lost. I just want to get to…the…uh…capitol?” You motion with your hands. Do places here have actual names or are they all just descriptions?

“Oh. If really need my help…I can take you to Hotland at least. I’m…Napstablook.”

You breathe a sigh of relief. “Thank you. I’m Chara, by the way.” 

Conversation is slow with Napstablook, but you’re grateful for the stretches of silence. You assume that most would questions why you were alone in a strange, dark swamp. They mostly wanted to know if you were okay. It’s nice.

“Do you like living in the underground?” You ask as you enter another dramatically different environment which would be pitch black if it weren’t for the deep blue glow of some type of tree and matching foliage.

Napstablook switches between nodding and shaking his head. “The surface is just so…busy. Everyone wants to talk…and my cousin insisted I live with him…” Napstablook sighs. “But it’s more peaceful here. And…I can’t let the family business die out.”

“That’s great you care so much about your family.” You narrowly avoid tripping in a shallow divot in the path. Someone really needs to invest in street lights or something.

 “It’s just snail racing…but thank you.” Napstablook hiccups and slows. “Well…this is my stop. Just head through that…dark…scary cave and make a left. The elevator will take you…to the capital.” He shifts uncomfortably for a second. “You’re welcome to visit again…if you even want to…”

What is it that makes monster so much more generous that humans, you wonder. Is it because their soul is their entierty? Or did years in the Underground make them humbler and want to work together?

Would humans have reacted the same way?

What would human be like if they were trapped, with no means of escape?

It would probably be a very horrible place.

You shake your head and give your attention back to Napstablook. “Thanks so much for helping. I would have been lost in there forever.” You chuckle. You would have found your way out. Eventually. Maybe.

“It was nothing…bye.” Napstablook hunches over but you can still the edges of a smile. You wave as he phases away in a way that is much more ghost-like than monster-like.

You make quick work of getting through the cave. That is until you hit a wall of humidity followed by a rush of heat. You strip off your winter coat, wondering how temperatures can change so vastly based on location.

You realize why you’re so hot when you leave the cave. Lava. And a lot of it. It bubbles and cracks threateningly from below. You clutch your jacket close as you traverse the bridge to solid ground. And just as Napstablook had said, there where multiple directions to head in. The left was the most well-worn from passersbys, clearly the way to go.

As soon are you head in that direction you find yourself bolting back. Hopefully, Frisk hasn’t seen you even though you has seen them. They’re having a conversation with some type of swirling fire monster, but you didn’t stay long enough to get a good enough look. You can’t let them find you now. You decide maybe now’s a good time to take Sans’ warning and stay away, mostly because you can’t determine what Chara might do. It’s a risk you’re not willing to take right now.

You end up in front of a building partially under construction, the deep gray façade being removed and replaced with clean, shimmery silver paneling. For a moment, you’re deterred by the ‘do not enter’ sign, but in your rationale that means Frisk wouldn’t go in there either. Right? 

You quickly slide past the yellow warning tape. The looming double doors you sneak through are vaguely reminiscent of the ones from the lab in the medical college; metal plated, bolted down, and heavy as hell. You jump when it smashes shut, cursing to yourself because of how loud it closed.

You have no idea what this building was supposed to be. Something says maybe at one point it was a place for observation or research based on the large screens, but most of the walls have been over taken with partially completed exhibition booth, spotlight tracks crossing the ceiling is a mess of wires and switches. Only one booth is finished, reading;

 ‘Museum of Underground Entertainment: The Life and History of Mettaton’

Alright then.

At least there’s a bathroom in here. Maybe you’d feel a little less groggy if you splashed some water on your face. The door swings open at the slightest touch, but you’re too tired to actually take in your surroundings since it’s already so dark inside.

You don’t even have a second to hunt for a light switch when the bathroom door snaps shut and a deep rumble rises up from the floor. A weak light hums to life when you realize you’re not in a bathroom, but rather in beat up elevator. It grunts and quakes as it slowly descends to who knows where. You jump up and start banging on the door, but you can’t imagine anyone would hear you.

The elevator slams into the ground, knocking you off your feet and onto the metal flooring. The door whizzes open, the mechanical whirring stops, and the light goes out.

You wince as you look up, greeting with nothing but dark green tiles and a vending machine. But you know exactly what type of place you’re in. 

This is a lab.  

_Why are we here?_

“Oh.” You stand up, checking that your body can still function after yet another fall. “Now you want to talk?” You hiss, walking towards the vending machine. You decide you won’t take a chance with anything inside. Plus, it wants gold coins as payment.

_I do not want to be here._

“Shut up.” You growl. You feel a startled shock from inside. “This is my body and I don’t give a shit what you want anymore.”

_Is the deal off then?_

“No. I fulfilled my end of the deal. You have to follow through with your end forever.” You’re not sure where you’re pulling this logic from, but it doesn’t matter. Chara doesn’t respond.

“But you will tell me where were are.”

_This is the royal laboratory. The true laboratory. The one above was built long after the death of the first royal scientist._

You wander in, forcefully denying Chara’s pull away. “Stop fighting me. I think the power went out. If this is a real lab or whatever there should be a circuit breaker somewhere.” The hallways are long and narrow and much like the rest of the Underground has its own mysterious glow providing just enough light.

_The lab runs off of magic._

“Fine, a magic circuit breaker then.”

The next open area is filled with beds. They’re covered in a fine layer of dust, but it gives the feeling of once being sterile and well maintained.

You start checking the walls and behind and around the countertops for any clues of how to restore the power. “What kind of experiments did they do down here anyway?”

_Depends on the subject. It all pertained to opening the barrier. Some of it was human experimentation. Some on monsters. Alphys was very instrumental in ruining the lives of many a monster._

You know how they meant it, but Chara’s affect is completely flat. They sound like they have no emotion or regard for anything. You can usually hear the distain or mocking. It’s unsettling.

_The double-soul spoke of it, the human projects. Keeping the bodies and souls contained. I was the first human to have their soul trapped here. When I fell,l I was brought here by the young Asgore. He and Asriel were practically identical as children, you know. He only did what was expected of him._

You didn’t ask for a story. But you’ll listen anyways.

_The old king had every experiment run on my soul that was possible at the time. The Mt. Ebott had been mostly uninhabited until our family arrived._

You cringe at that. But they aren’t wrong. You start to move into the next room.

_How do you think they discovered how many souls were needed to open the barrier? Why do you think I have abilities far beyond the average human soul? Do not misunderstand, it was expected outcome to trap a child for the betterment of monster-kind. But I stayed in a state of chronic youth due to state of my soul. That is until the old king passed away._

Chara’s voices hitches as you enter a room full the brim with overgrown golden wildflowers. They wretch through the tiles, over taking the hallway in a weed like fashion, cracking the mirrors as they snake up the wall.

_Horrible. There is nothing left here except how Alphys destroyed Asriel with these disgusting flowers. She saids she was trying to save his soul to appease the mourning king. Instead she made a soulless shell of the kindest soul to ever grace this wretched world. She deserves to die._

So that’s why Chara hates Alphys more than anyone else. You can understand the circumstances, but that doesn’t make it right. “Killing Alphys doesn’t save Asriel or Flowey.” You state bluntly.

_I suppose not. But those who cause suffering deserve to suffer._

“That’s a big statement coming from you.” You grunt, turning back down the dim hallway.

_I suffered for monsters. Everything Asgore knew about souls came from me. When he became king, he had me removed from my decades of imprisonment and made me part of the royal family._

“And you repaid them by tearing them apart.” You wonder who Chara would have been if they had remained part of your family and living among humans. Their hate spanned much longer than their time in the Underground. It makes you sick to think about.

_That was never my intention. Destroying humans meant getting the necessary souls to have monsters retake the surface. They would all be eradicated for their revolting actions against monsters._

In a twisted way, you get it. Chara may have gone about it in a malicious way but they only wanted to save the world they had become part of. And clearly they have the capacity to forgive if they could get past being a human test subject for so long. Maybe once upon time there would have been hope for them. You can’t imagine there is now.

“That’s neither here nor there anymore.” You say quietly. “Monsters are on the surface, and they’re much stronger than us. There’s still problems, but it’d already done with. You should be done with it.”

_Strength. Interesting._

A chill runs up your spine. Their familiar tone is back. Why?

“Chara?!”

You spin around. The voice is far, but not too distant. It’s Frisk.

“Damn. I guess that’s the only way out.” You huff under your breath. “I’m here Frisk!” You shout back. You don’t want to be involved with anyone until you’re at this capitol place. But you don’t have much of a choice right now.

You try to move forward but your body collapses, a heavy tug-of-war surprising you from the inside. “Chara! What the hell are you doing?” You cry, using every ounce of your own determination to hold them at bay.

_You are correct. Monsters are stronger than humans. Maybe I have been attempting this incorrectly. Asriel will be sure to understand my position when he sees the power I can acquire with a monster’s soul. I can still have what I want._

“You promised you wouldn’t do anything to anyone!” You huff, maintaining a thread of control.

_You said it yourself earlier. The deal was complete._

“Not on your end!”

_Do you think I’m stupid? I know how a deal works. And ours is over._

You’re too tired. You don’t have enough fight left in you to stop them.

“Chara? Come to elevator!” Frisk calls again.

Chara stands your body up. “Coming!” They call back with a voice almost indiscernible to yours. You bang from the inside, trying to force your way back out.

“Do not worry. No one will die until I’ve gotten the soul I want.” They laugh.

“And with this body, getting it will be easier than I could have ever imagined.”

You know exactly who they’re talking about.

Sans.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to [shizukopride](http://shizukopride.tumblr.com/) and [GorillazObsessor](http://archiveofourown.org/users/GorillazObsessor/profile) for editing!


	38. Direction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG  
> Ugggghhh
> 
> Enjoy some angst.

“Chara! I’m so glad you’re alright!”

Frisk throws their arms around your neck, pulling you into a tight squeeze. Chara stiffens against their touch. You growl for Chara to let them be, hoping that they really will keep from hurting anyone for now. “How did you end up down here?” They push back, a wash of relief over their face.

“Thought it was a bathroom.” Chara says, turning your head away. “My mistake.” They’re clearly trying to avoid looking directly at Frisk.

You suppose if anyone knows Chara to any extent besides Flowey, it would be Frisk. And you can tell Chara has no intention of being caught.

“At least you’re okay. I was able to turn the power back on from one of Alphys’ old computers.” Frisk grabs your wrist and pulls you into the run down elevator which had only recently dropped you to the depths of the run-down lab. It hums to life, lifting you back to the upper floors.  “We were really worried that you got hurt when Sans accidently dropped you.”

“You think he did what?” Chara scoffs for a second, almost losing your inflection. You were also curious as to why Frisk thought that. Sans did think you were possessed when you pushed him away, and maybe he didn’t want to worry everyone. He could have lied, but you doubt Sans would purposefully make himself look like that much of an ass.

The elevator grumbles as metal screeches against metal. The doors grind open as Chara follows Frisk out. They start out the door when Chara laughs. “You…don’t actually believe Sans dropped me, do you?” The attempt to keep their voice similar to yours goes unnoticed by Frisk. They continue on out of the lab. Frisk just stands there for a second, confused.

“What do you mean?”

“I chose not to go. I said I planned to go alone, so I did.” You feel a smirk crawl onto your face, turned so Frisk can’t see. “Besides,” You grit your teeth from the inside, thinking that Frisk doesn’t need to be dragged into your personal problems. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing Sans has ever done to me.”

Chara glances over your shoulder, catching a glimpse of a deep frown set into Frisk’s face and they trot behind you. You wish they would realize that you’re leading the way when you should have no idea where you’re going.

“Isn’t that how he treats every human? Using them for whatever he likes, telling lies and never really caring about any of them unless there is some kind of ridiculous circumstance?” Your hands go up like it’s such an obvious thing, but Chara is careful to keep your back to Frisk. You breathe out, thanking the stars that Chara left out actual details.

You feel a force push down on your shoulder, as Frisk’s fingers dig into the fabric of your shirt. “Hey! What’s the matter with you? That’s not true! Sans cares a lot about us!”

Chara rips your shoulder out from Frisk’s grasps. “If you really believe he’s not using you and everyone else all that determination must have knocked out your common sense.” Frisk stares at you with a mix of horror and hurt. You snort at Chara’s frustration starting to pour out.

“I’m just tired.” It’s a shoddy attempt to cover their tracks, but Frisk doesn’t say anything after that. If they had kept going, Frisk would be sure to figure them out.

The elevator to the capitol is not what you expected. The light brassy metal is oversized and sparkling with a red, blocky L and one printed near the top. It much too modern, really. Frisk knuckles the button as you both wait in heavy silence for the elevator to arrive.

“Aria said…you and Sans fight a lot and he’s done some…bad things in the last few months.” They sigh. “I know he’s not the nicest to all humans but you’ve been around longer than most other people. I hoped things would be different. But I understand why you would think those things.”

You so badly want to talk to Frisk. You want to know things from their perspective, you want to figure out why you’re so mixed up with someone who might understand. You want to figure out what made you want to trust Chara and why you stopped heading warnings. Maybe together, you could figure out why everything went to hell, more than once.

But Chara just stands in silence in your body, unmoved.

Frisk shifts around uncomfortably, maybe because of you, maybe because of the heat, until the elevator arrives at its destination.

The ride is painfully quiet until Frisk mumbles. “I hope after this you don’t leave. It’s nice to have someone around who knows what it’s like. And if the other Chara can hear me…”

Both of your interests pique. Maybe for them more than you.

“I know you’re not all bad. I wish you could find what would make you happy. I wanted to help you but I couldn’t. I couldn’t save you. I’m sorry.” Frisk rubs their own shoulders. “But maybe this Chara can.” 

You would say that Frisk’s small, hopeful smile is killing you inside, but you’re already inside so there isn’t really anywhere else to go. Chara still doesn’t say anything, but you can feel them contemplating something under a heavy veil of tension. What that thing is, you can’t decipher.

When the door rolls back when you reach your destination, Chara is practically tackled against the wall.

“You little shit! I was so freaking worried!”

Chara growls as Aria hugs you so hard you think you might pop a lung.

“Don’t do anything to her.” You warn. You can feel just how hard Chara rolls your eyes.

“Are you okay?” Aria shoves you back, giving you a once over. “No broken bones? No lacerations?”

Chara ducks your head. Ah, hiding their eyes. No wonder they wouldn’t look at Frisk. “I’m fine. I’m just tired.”

“Yeah, of course. Come on Frisk, let’s take her to castle.”

The Capitol is amazing. Most of the buildings are in varying shades of gray with splashes of bright color-blocked art. It looked somewhat recent, but it was fantastic.

“It is so different.” Chara whispers to themselves.

You knock around so you now they feel it. “What does that mean?”

“Nothing you need to worry about.”

Frisk taps your shoulder. “Did you say something, Chara?”

“No, I didn’t.” Chara responds dully.

“I like the colors too.” They whisper. “My mom says it’s the best thing they’ve ever done in the Underground.”

“You know, you’ve put me through so much you could at least tell me whatever I want to know.” You growl. “Maybe you could actually be helped if you just let people listen.” As the last words fall from your lips, something that feel likes an angry rush of air, whips around you causing you intense pain.

Guess that’s a no.

The castle is a replica of Toriel’s home in the ruins. At least the first level is. If you weren’t laying in the black abyss that is the inside of your body, writhing in pain, you might have asked what the rest of it looked like. After a few moments, the pain subsides.

“H-hey! Everyone’s back!”

Guilt wrenches at you. Alphys. You know what happened wasn’t your fault, but if you had been stronger…more determined…

“Damn kid!” Undyne punches you in the arm, hard enough to hurt but not enough to leave a bruise. “Stupid as hell, but I gotta say you’ve got some balls to jump down here by yourself!”

Chara shrinks back, holding the spot where Undyne had hit. There’s no time to think as Papyrus already has you in a vice grip embrace, yelling about how worried they were for the small human.

“But you were so brave! I, the Great Papyrus, am very impressed! Are you not impressed Sans?” Papyrus whips around, but no one is behind him to your relief. “Oh. How odd! Sans was here just a moment ago!”

“I believe we should let Chara rest. They’ve been here so long. It’s been almost 15 hours since you left.” Toriel walks out from the hallway, one claw gloved in a bright yellow oven mitt, the other already reaching for Frisk. So that’s how long it’s been. You can’t decide if it’s felt longer or shorter.

Chara completely freezes up, watching her move toward Frisk through wide eyes. “I am sure she would love to regale you with her adventures, but for now please rest my child.” She places her free claw around Frisk’s shoulders. “For now, my runaway child, a very irresponsible medical student and I need to have a serious conversation.”

Aria turns towards your and mouths ‘help me’ but even if you were you, there’s nothing you can do for either of them. They’ll survive.

Maybe.

You close the door to a good sized room. It’s stripped bare except for two beds and a beat up armoire. Chara shakes, pressing themselves to the door. They’re taking long, drawn out breathes, hand clutched to your chest.

You can feel it. Doubt, uncertainty and something else. It’s faint, but it almost feels like regret.

“Rethinking things?” You snarl.

“Of course not.” They spit back. You can’t feel anything anymore. “You think those fools can change anything? You think you can? You are pathetic. ”

“You sure didn’t feel like you wanted to hurt anyone. And stooping so low to call Toriel a fool?”

“Shut up!” They hiss. “Nothing is more important than gaining power for my goals! Asriel will surely be returned, and together we will mold this world, glorious and perfect!”

“And who, exactly, is supposed to be part of this world? You keep saying you hate humans, but you seem to hate monsters just as much.”

“These monsters have been tainted by the surface.” Chara straightens out. “Starting over is the most reasonable choice.”

“Or you can just accept the way the world is and realize it’s not as bad as you think. Sure some bad…actually, some horrible things have happened in the last few months…” You’re frustrated with the entire situation. But do you hate them for it? “It’s mostly because of you, but if you would just stop fighting it…”

Chara slams your fists against the door. “I said for you to shut up! You are nothing but a convenient vessel! Stop acting like you have any understanding of who I am!”

“Is everything alright?” Toriel calls from afar.

Chara responds weakly. “Yes!”

“Convincing.” Your voice has a slight laugh to it.

Chara drops themselves onto the nearest bed. Regardless of which one of you is out, your body is far overworked and exhausted. It only takes a few second before you’re out cold.

When you wake up a few hours later, groggy and still on the inside. The soft murmur of voices you fell asleep to has turned to complete silence. You wish there was a sun in the Underground, if not for any other reason than just to tell time. There’s an old analog clock on the barren nightstand.

“What time is it?” You gurgle.

“Midnight.” Chara pulls their feet off the bed, rifling through your jacket, which had been haphazardly thrown to the floor. They pull out the knife, giving it wipe down with the hem of your shirt. “If you really are insistent that I leave the rest of them untouched, this is the time to go.”

You swallow hard. “Where are we going? Why are you doing this?”

“We’re going to be judged, of course. An actual boss monster’s soul would be better fitted to the situation, I suppose.” Chara hums, as they open the door trying to make no sound. “But a boss-like monster’s soul will be enough. I will just have to make sure I take it quickly enough, before . Even though all the monsters here are extremely powerful and would suffice…” Chara pushes your hair from their face. There’s a mirror in the darkened hallway.

Your irises shine blood red, mouth curled into a heinous grin.

“But that bag of bones has been in the way for too long. Removing him will ensure my victory.”

You can feel chills run up your spine, burning into your throat.

“Finally,” They breath out, turning to an identical set of stairs which brought you even deeper into the Underground from the Ruins.

“The end is coming.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The answer to your question is yes.  
> Yes we are.


	39. Sans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *plays megalovania on repeat for three days straight*

Light pours into whatever place you’ve entered, coating everything in golden rays. 

The light blinds you for a second, but when your vision returns you can see stained glass windows adorned with the same symbols from the entrance to the ruins. Tiles alternating between pearly white and glistening gold line the hall, catching the sun. Tall pillars flank the walls in every direction.

“So.”

Chara turns to the direction of the voice.

“Last time, I just assumed which one you were. Let’s not play games. Just go ahead and tell me.” Sans walks out from behind one of the pillars. You gasp from the inside. He looks completely exhausted. You’re not completely sure of Chara’s plan, but Sans being so tired can’t bode well.

Chara hisses a laugh through your teeth. “You are so incredibly lazy you cannot even venture a guess. But in no way am I surprised.”

Sans sighs, pinching his brow bone between his thumb and forefinger. “Just let Chara back in control so we can go home, huh?”

You’re confused. Sans made it sound like something was supposed to happen the next time you met. Everyone keeps talking about fallen children and judgement. But if you’re missing something, so is Chara.

“What are you talking about?” They fold your arms over your chest.

“As a human, you’re judged based on your LV. But all of your LV is artificial. Congrats, you managed to not kill anyone this time around you little freak. Which means the both of you are free to go.” Sans shrugs, looking uninterested. “If you were some type of monster hybrid thing, I would have to judge you based on your destructive potential, like a monster. But seeing as you don’t look or feel any different, I’m guessing even Flowey can see how pointless this is.”

Your teeth grind together as Chara grips the handle of  the knife, which was secured in your back pocket , with unyielding ferocity at the mention of Flowey.

“Just give it up already . ” Sans continues.

There’s a long stretch of silence. You can see Sans is patiently waiting, but for what? For Chara to just return control to you? For them to concede?

A rumble of a laugh erupts from your chest. “Idiot. How dare you speak of things you know nothing of. Flowey can never understand the way he is now. He is nothing but a shell of Asriel without his soul, without his thoughts.” Chara starts to walk forward, an air of wistfulness about them. “I know my Asriel would understand, he would see what my goals had been. What they are. He just has to be returned. Then together, we can recreate this world.” Chara wavers from their normal strict control, their voice peppered with manic beats. You shake from the inside, afraid of what they may do.

“I think you missed the boat on that one.” Sans smirks, as Chara paces diagonally trying to assess the situation. They’re acting similarly when they tried to attack Alphys.

Chara laughs. “Don’t I though? I believe there is an opportunity right before me.”

It takes Sans a moment to register what Chara’s implying. His face twists, changing from confusion to shock and finally landing on disbelief. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

Chara shrugs, confidence building. You bang your fist from the inside, but Chara refuses to waver. “Unlike some fools, I prefer to stay serious and focused at the task at hand.”

Chara’s not directly look at Sans, but if he thinks you didn’t see the quick wisp of blue escape his eye, he’s wrong.

“Did our Chara finally get to you? You want me too now?”

You would be completely mortified if you weren’t freaking out about the fact that Sans was actively provoking Chara. They’re equally as disturbed as you are, but Chara is much more disgusted with  the insinuation, distain clearly etched into your face. “If I wasn’t so repulsed by you, I could have easily killed you at any time.”

Sans cocks his head. “But you didn’t. But why not just go for Asgore or Toriel? They’re actually boss monsters.” A mocking smile stretches across Sans’ face. Chara glares, as you feel your mouth turn downwards. You don’t understand. What is Sans’ trying to prove?

“It’s because you can’t this time around, can you? You can’t bring yourself to hurt mommy and daddy after spending all that time with Frisk and now with Chara, huh? Guess you’ve gone soft.”

It happens too fast for you to comprehend. Silver of the knife, a flash of blue. The last time you looked, you were maybe 20 feet away from Sans, and yet now you were across the room. A thick, smoky blue fog fills the hall, illuminated in patches by golden light. You can see your soul, black and pulsating erratically, floating in front of you.

“You may not be a boss-monster per say,” Chara shouts, voice ragged and deep, they lunge into the smoke like a rabid dog. “But give yourself some credit. Call it a gift, since your tendency is to be so overly cocky.” Chara snorts. “It’s not like you use the power you’ve been given anyways. You’ve always shirked your responsibility, giving up the crown after every death despite you being the next most powerful monster in this world.” Something moves behind you. “You don’t deserve the power of a boss or a boss-like monster. You deserve to die.”

“Chara! What the hell are you doing!?” Hot tears stream from somewhere, and they feel real. Usually things on the inside are just abstract feelings of emotions. But everything is just overloaded between the two of you.

Chara hisses low. “Idiot! Stop crying!” They shove a fist to your cheek, stopping the flow. “It’s hard enough to see as it is.”

Chara jumps back before you get a chance to respond. Right where you were standing, two glowing femurs and a humorous are jammed into the ground, uprooting the tile. They slowly phase away, leaving nothing but a damaged floor.

“Losing your touch, are you? An infant could have dodged that.” Chara cackles while staying on the move. You whimper. “Don’t distract me, unless you actually do have a death wish.” They whisper as they round a pillar.

Okay. No more talking. If you had to fight Sans as yourself, you’d already be dead for sure. This is further proven when something you didn’t see at all cracks into the pillar, scaring the ever-loving shit out of you. Chara has your body under control through, already sprinting across the room. If you knew you had this much potential, you would have joined a track team in high school or something.

“Stop attacking from the shadows, coward!” Chara shouts. “Let me have your soul! Give up!”

The fog billows apart like the red sea, Sans situated at the far end. A single eye blazes with magic, grin dark. “Not gonna happen, kiddo. I gave you the chance to just walk away, so just walk.” Sans shakes his head. “What’s the point anyways?”

It starts subtle and low. It slowly gains volume and speed, maniacal and angry. Chara’s crazed laughter echos from every corner of the room, crushing down on you. “What’s the point?! Someone like you could never understand! I have nothing but Asriel left! All I need is for him to understand! I would do anything for Asriel!” Chara marches forward, switching their grip on the knife. They tremble with some mix of distorted pleasure and hatred.

“You would never know what I feel.” Chara shrugs and shakes their head. The action is strange and twitchy. “What happened back then…between Asriel and I…it was for the betterment of our family. The betterment of monsters. But you…you just let your own brother die! You are nothing!”

Another blurred second, wind rushing out from your lungs, boney fingers strained against your throat. Your feet aren’t even touching the floor as Sans grits his teeth together. “Shut your fucking mouth.”

You can still breathe, though. Chara cranks against Sans’ hand with broken laughter. “You really do not have the will to actually injure this human. I was correct, I did not even need maximal LV. This is going to be simple.” The knife skims Sans’ hoodie, as you hear it clank against bone. He drops you without a sound, shifting back.

Chara doesn’t give him a second, already jumping towards him. The knife swings wildly, missing him by inches with each strike. You can see the sweat forming on Sans’ skull as he dodges, still exerting just enough effort to do so.

While you’re wondering why Sans just hasn’t done the blue light thing, you realize he’s been trying. Everything has been moving so quickly you hadn’t noticed the waxing and waning of blue in the periphery of your vision. The blue keeps shattering apart as Chara continues their assault. Back in the lab, Chara was taken off guard. The rules of a direct fight must be different. You try to hold them back, but they’re too far gone, wild with ferocity. 

Chara halts. As if from nowhere two large, animalistic skulls float , each the size of  a car. The y growl and snarl, electric blue magic crackling around them. Sans stands between them, head low. Chara’s nervous energy pulsates through you as they scramble back. Magical energy buzzes through the air, you can see your hair starting to rise with the static.

And then you can feel the electricity. You feel the minute stabs and shocks. You’re back? Why? Completely disoriented, you fall to the ground. The knife falls to the ground, reverberating against the tile. In front of you, the animal skulls have formed swirling balls of thumping magic, poised to attack.

You realize what’s about to happen. He’s going to take you both out at once. Maybe it could work, but you just can’t let it end this way. “S-sans! It’s me! Stop!” You sob, hoping your voice is loud enough over the earsplitting buzzing.

Sans’ head pops up. “Chara?” The mouths of the beasts close, taking their noises with them. They phase out. “Chara? Are you back?” Sans starts to jog toward your crumpled, crying form. You still don’t know what happened. Did Chara just give up? Were they afraid? You certainly are.

Sans is only a few feet from you, reaching out. And then you know. You know where Chara had gone, and you know why. You’re too confused, too disoriented to fight back. Your hand goes directly into Sans unlit eye socket, under Chara’s control.

It burns like nothing you’ve ever felt before. Pain climbs from fingertips and latches to every possible surface. But Chara doesn’t flinch as your skin bubbles and sizzles. Sans growls and stumbles back, pushing you away. A hand flies over the socket, his magic flaring out of control.

“I cannot believe the both of you! Fools!” Chara reaches down, scooping up the knife in one swift motion with your good hand.

And then red.

The front of Sans’ chest oozes out, blood pooling onto the floor in front of him. Both of his hands struggle at the wound, still confused from the assault on his magic. He trips back, breathing raggedly. Sans ends up sitting down and still focused on the wound as he bleeds out. You scream from the inside, horrified. You can’t believe it. Chara used you until the very end. And now…

Chara screeches a laugh, tear s streaming out. Whose they are, you don’t know. “Finally! Finally, your soul is mine! Everything will be mine again!” They choke out, trembling. The knife shakes and they take slow, purposeful steps towards Sans. Its gleam is replaced with thick red, dripping from the blade.

“This ends now. Die!”

And then blue.

You’re slammed to the ground, engulfed in shining magic. “What!?” Chara’s voice reaches a new octave as they struggle against the force. “How is this possible?!”

“Frisk! Aria!” Sans shouts, now standing on two feet, magic intact. Frisk sprints on from behind a pillar near the end of the hall to Sans, while Aria rounds from the far exit carrying a large, glass cylinder with metal plating.

Chara continues to scream as Frisk and Sans exchange some worrying glances. Frisk’s soul appears, brightly shining and strong. They approach you slowly. Sans’ face is stoic and unmoving, but Frisk’s face is filled with pity.

“Chara…” They start, rounding your soul with their hand taking care not to touch. “This is going to hurt really badly for the both of you. That’s what Asgore said. But this is the only option left. I wish…I wish I could have saved both of you.”

Sans places a hand over Frisk’s shoulder before giving them a curt nod. You don’t know where Aria went. Together, Sans and Frisk reach toward your soul, despite Chara’s terrorized protests. A human hand and skeleton hand plunge into your soul, a small shock of black explodes out.

All you feel is pain. It rips at every seam in your body, tearing in every direction. No matter how much you scream, the pain just burns through you. It feels like being burned alive and drowning at the same time. The burn from Sans ’ magic is nothing compared to this.

You’re sure this is it. You’re going to die. Everything is blanketed in black until…

It’s gone.

The pain is gone.

The noise is gone.

Chara’s gone.

“Aria! Get it now!” Frisk is yelling. Something flies overhead. Light flashes.

“Got it! I got them!” That’s Aria. She sounds freaked out.

There’s more yelling, more scrambling around you. But you can’t be bothered to get a better look. You feel like you’ve been hit by a truck and then it backed up just to run you over. At least there is a sensation of floating.

Never mind, Sans picked you up. “Hey. Anyone home?” He asks softly.

You muster up just enough energy to speak. “Yeah. And you know what?”

There’s a slight smirk in his face. “What?”

“I think I'm  the only one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're not done just yet ya'll.  
> But we're getting close. 
> 
> I really hope you guys liked how this chapter ended up. It's a big deal since I've never gotten this far in something I've written, and this scene has been in my mind for months. As always, thanks for reading guys.
> 
> And thanks to my awesome editors!


	40. Petals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm not dead! 
> 
> Kinda. 
> 
> I hope you guys like this one and it was worth how long it took me to get it up

“Oh god, can someone else grab this thing?” Aria groans, holding the cylindrical glass and metal device with just one arm, trying to keep herself as far back from it as she can. The glass rattles and shakes angrily, a mix of black and red smoke blazing from within.

Sans half tosses you in an attempt to readjust, breaking your focus on the smoke as it wretches in its cage. You groan from how sore you are. Even if you wanted to protest and walk, there’s no way you could have. “Aria, you’re seriously not afraid of the soul containment units are you?” He laughs. You feel your face heat up.

Uh, what? Now? You thought that shit had stopped months ago.

“Excuse me, but you weren’t trapped in one of these things for who the hell knows how long!” Aria bites back, as Frisk comes over to steady the device with her.

You turn your head to get a better look. You gasp as the smokes starts to die down and you see a soul, identical to Frisks smashing into the glass walls. Frantic and desperate, the little soul continues its rampage with no signs of stopping.

“Is that Chara?” Your voice is strained and confused. It’s still a surreal feeling that Chara isn’t part of you anymore. Empty isn’t the word you want to use, but it’s along those lines.

“Yep.” Sans nods.

You click your tongue against your teeth, watching Frisk and Aria lift the containment unit. “How…I thought you said doing that could kill me.”

“To be fair, it almost did.” Aria rolls her eyes as she and Frisk head toward the door.

“I asked Asgore what to do.” Frisk turns over their shoulder, walking backward. “I know you guys didn’t want me to, but I didn’t know what else to do. He said there was an ancient way to separate souls that had been fused together, created even before the war between humans and monsters. When they still lived together.” Frisk pauses, giving themselves a second to think. “That’s why almost no one knows about it. Asgore was told about it when he became king, in case a fallen human managed to get the soul of a really strong monster. It’s normally for a fused monster and human soul, but it works for this too…I guess.”

“It’s a little complicated for my tastes, but it got the job done.” Sans says. “All you need is a human and monster willing to actively engage the soul at the same time. Basically someone holds, and someone else pulls.”

“That’s a little oversimplified, don’t you think? It was still sort of a shot in the dark…” Aria grumbles, and she and Frisk struggle to figure out how to walk up the stairs. Sans shakes his head, one eye going dark and other illuminating with magic. The container rises from their grasp and floats unceremoniously upwards. Aria crosses her arms over her chest. “You couldn’t have done that earlier?”

“Had _my hands full_.” Sans pushes his arms forward just enough to indicate he was talking about carrying you.

“Speaking of almost dying…uh…” You search for a place to look that isn’t Sans’ chest which is still splattered with something that resembles blood and end up watching the container float.

Sans shakes silently with laughter. “It’s ketchup.”

Your head shoots in his direction. “What?”

Sans shifts you around a bit, and sure enough you can tell. That’s for sure not blood, and it’s definitely kind of gross.

But of course it would be ketchup.  

“How did you…” You start. Aria and Frisk flank either side of Sans.

“It was all part of the plan!” Frisk chirps with a slight giggle. “We knew we had to get Chara to fight so we could engage your soul!”

Aria nods. “We were a little bit worried about Flowey, but after what happened in Snowdin we figured it actually wasn’t a problem at all, right Frisk?” You think Aria’s tone is questionable as Frisk nods eagerly, which strikes you as odd but decide to ignore it for now.

It makes sense though. If you knew what was to come, Chara would have also known and everything would have been pointless. There was something that was still bothering you though. “But…when Chara was pretending to be me…”

“Chara,” Sans shakes his head. “Maybe that would have worked a while ago, but you really think we can’t you guys apart? You got me in Snowdin and maybe for a minute in Waterfall, but come on. Maybe not by your souls, sure. But you and Chara are completely different people.”

“Please!” Aria laughs boisterously. “I knew the second you walked out the elevator it wasn’t you! Chara’s got nothing on you!” She gives you a light punch to your arm. You wince.

But you still have to smile. Somehow in all of this mess you ended up surrounded by people who seriously care about you. You do wish there was a way that Chara could have had that as well.

You shake your head. You shouldn’t be worried about that.

“Oh, do you want any determination serum? I grabbed a whole bunch of crap from the lab you know…probably more than I needed to but hey. We should be prepared.” Aria laughs. You shake your head. You will never let one of those damn needles near your arm again.

Frisk tugs at one of Sans’ arm, knocking you around a bit. They might care about you, but they’re still pretty tactless in a group; you laugh to yourself. “Asgore is going to be so excited that it worked! Are you excited to meet him?”

“M-meet?” Your voice cracks.

“Yeah. Asgore! He’ll be here tomorrow, he says he wants to know everything that happened. Alyphs already got you guys excused and everything…Chara?”

You’re visibly shaking. “Hey. You okay?” Sans halts as you reach the top of the stairway.

“I…I can’t…” You continue shaking but you aren’t sure why you feel so terrified. “No Asgore…or Toriel. Not now.”

You take a second to look up. Aria and Sans are visibly confused at your out-of-proportion reaction. Frisk just silently watches you. How far does a gift to understand people reach? Does Frisk see something that you can’t?

Sans slowly lets you down to the floor, making sure you can still stand as you start to calm down. “I don’t really get what the issue is…but should we take her back to Snowdin?” Sans says slowly. “There isn’t really anywhere we can go besides that if she can’t see Asgore…or Toriel.”

“I guess.” It’s clear that Aria’s apprehensive. “You should take Frisk and Chara there. Then come back and help me get this to the lab…or whatever’s left of it anyways.”

“Um…” You stumble a bit, but Sans doesn’t give you any chance to fall. You’re grateful for that at least. “What’s going to happen to Chara?”

Nervous glances are exchanged.

“We’re going to take Chara’s soul apart piece by piece.” Sans says quietly. You stop breathing. “Their soul has persisted so long, the only way for them to go is to voluntarily go…and you know as well as we do…they just don’t have the _heart_ for that.”

You releasing the air you’d be holding in. “That’s not funny.”

“Wasn’t supposed to be.” He says flatly.

Silence fills the corridor. Chara made your life hell. They broke you apart. They never cared about you, you know that. They just had their own, blinding goals to complete. You were just unlucky enough to be the person they could most easily use.

So why did it hurt so bad knowing they were going to die?

“Come on.” Sans says offering a hand to you. Frisk already had his other one, not looking up from the ground.

You take it. There’s no one to tell you otherwise now.

In a burst of light you’re back in the cold. You realize you don’t have your coat as a shiver penetrates your spine shocking every already battered nerve. Sans quickly pushes the door open to the locked cabin from earlier. Frisk bolts inside, also severely underdressed but you’re not energized enough to rush so Sans just sort of pushes you in.

There’s not much light, but you can tell the setup of this home is fairly similar to Sans’ and Papyrus’ house on the surface. It’s significantly smaller and very empty, but its almost feels like you’ve been here before.

The lights come on. Oh. Nevermind. You would have remembered such a garish carpet; shag carpeting in a zigzag pattern. Why are you surprised?

“You guys gonna be okay here by yourselves for a while? There’s not really anything to eat. We haven’t been here since ‘Mettaton Land’-” Sans rolls the lights in his eyes while making air quotes. “-started being built.”

“I think we’ll be okay.” Frisk says and you slowly make your way over to what you hope is a bean bag and not a trash bag, since there is no other seating, and drop yourself into it. Okay, good. Bean bag.

“Okay.” Sans fidgets. You wonder if he’s just hanging around waiting to be able to make another short cut. “Just…uh…let me know if you guys need anything.” Sans gives you a strange look. You turn away, hoping that your face is hot because you’re still feeling shitty.

And with that he’s gone.

You huddle into yourself not really sure what to think.

But you know there’s more as Frisk walks up to you. “I didn’t want to say anything while Sans was still here.”

“What’s that?” You say in a much more nonchalant way than you expect to.

Frisk wrings their hands together. “Well, I didn’t know you were in lab when I came to Hotland. Flowey told me.”

You don’t shift even though you’re surprised. “Why?”

“He said he was worried. About both of…you.” Frisk searches your face, but you figure you’re too tired to give a real reaction. “Sorry. Of all people, I should know it’s just you in there, huh?”

Yeah, you think. Just you.

“Flowey was worried?”

“Yes. They were worried Chara would do something drastic, which they did…so, we should really thank him.”

Frisk helps you to your feet. “What do you mean? How can we thank him?”

Their head sinks a little. “You know, it’s weird. Flowey said if everyone lived we’d end up back here. I don’t know how he would know. But it makes me think he’d be here too.”

As Frisk tries to explain how Flowey apparently has predictive powers, the door opens to reveal none other than a swaying yellow flower.

Sickly. Graying. Wilted.

Dying.

“Flowey?!” You and Frisk shout in horror.

“Looks like you two losers managed to make it out alive, huh? Good to know.” He says weakly, as a gray petal floats away from his body and lands gently on the snow.

You don’t know how to react, but Frisk clearly has the same confusion as you do. “Flowey, what’s happening to you?”

Flowey hisses, but quickly erupts into a cough. “It’s my fault really. Shoulda known I would have been done in by at least one Chara.”

“When we fought here earlier…when I cut you…” You whisper. “I knew you were weak from it but...”

“It’s not a big deal.” He says. “I really had hoped there was a way for you and Chara to live, but I guess it’s good enough to know one of you had. Besides…” Flowey shakes his head a bit. “My Chara would totally lose it if I died. Which I am, so, you know.”

Your heart feels like its crumbling. This was your fault. No matter what, people had been hurt because of you.

“Actually, can I ask a favor?” Flowey grunts, one eye open. You and Frisk exchange looks. After a few silent seconds of considerations you nod.

“Can I see your soul?”

There isn’t chance to answer. You feel the familiar pull as a light bursts from your chest. You expect to see darkness but instead a glistening, crystalline heart hovers in the air, bathing the white snow in the true color of your soul. At first you can’t see what color it is, but after it settles it’s fairly close to your favorite color, still with a darkened border. But it’s bright and strong.

It’s not what you expected to see which causes you choke back tears.

“Chara…it’s so pretty.” Frisk says softly with a sweet smile. You agree.

Flowey quietly observes the humming pulsations of your soul, no longer so black. “Just like I thought. There’s still a little bit of Chara left in you.” He sighs, content.

You look at your soul a little closer. Indeed, within the saturated color of your own soul small pockets of vibrant red pop in and out between the layers. Clearly different.

“I’m glad at least a little of them will survive. Thanks.”

Your mind races. No wonder you were afraid of Toriel and Asgore. No wonder you’d been so upset to learn Chara is set to die. Even though you’re separated, you had really started to become one person. As more and more thoughts floor your mind, you remember something. Aria. What had she taken from the lab? Just determination serum or…

“Flowey! We might be able to help! If you just stay here and wait! I think we have a medicine I’ve been helping Alphys make, it could help!”

Flowey cocks his head, clearly unable to believe that would be the truth. “There’s no medicine for monters.”

“There is now!” You try to shout, but you’re still too sore. “It’s real!”

“Do you really have something like that?” Frisk gasps. You suppose they never really knew what you did in the lab.

“I’m not sure, but I think Aria probably has some, so Flowey if you just stay here…” You plead. You have to try to help him. But he’s already shifting away. “Where are you going?”

“Chara, Frisk. Thanks. I get what this is about. But I think enough is enough, don’t you?” Flowey smiles, but it’s filled with pain, from both his slow decay and from the hurt of truly losing Chara. No matter what he had said to you and Chara back in Snowdin, back in Hotland, Flowey wanted to stay with Chara as much as Chara wanted to stay with him.

“Flowey.” You drop into the snow. “Please. Try. For the little bit of Chara in me. Please.”

Flowey hesitates. You don’t want him to die. You don’t want Chara to die. You know both of them have done horrible things. But you also know they haven’t been who they wanted to be, who they should have been. Lives unfinished. You can try to give at least Flowey a chance.

He sighs. “Chara…I’m sorry.”

With a light crunch, Flowey disappears into the snow.

You fall back on your knees. Useless. Hot tears start to stream down your face as you let yourself sink to you knees. Who you cry for, you dont know.

You can’t do anything alone.

You can’t help anyone alone.

Why?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter may have been slightly influence on my current state of school-induced psychosis haha. 
> 
> But in all seriousness, he next few months are going to be really hard for me. But I'm super determined to finish this, I've made it so far so I will. Don't worry. My updates may be fairly sporadic in the next while, and I think I might release two chapters the next time I update (for...reasons). So again, thanks for being patient with me guys.
> 
> And remember, if you want to ask me stuff, or just bug me you can always do that on tumblr!  
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


	41. Close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very nervous about this chapter.  
> And the reason it took a while was because this is a two chapter update!
> 
> PLEASE READ BEFORE CONTINUING 
> 
> This chapter contains smut, but you, the reader, will have full control of whether or not you part take in any of it. As you read the chapter you will come across a warning and a link. Depending on your personal preference you can keep reading on or you can click the link which will take you directly to chapter 42.  
> This has not bearing on the overall story line, so if you decide it's not for you, you don't have to worry about it. 
> 
> I hope you guys like it, whatever you pick, and I hope this chapter works out okay.

Frisk had managed to find a bunch of a blankets stored in a closet alongside an array of the most random items. Which consequently tumbled all over them in an attempt to get the blankets. They didn’t seem to mind though, popping in the carnage with a big smile plastered to their face.

You take the darker of the two comforters and cocoon yourself in it. It’s a little dusty but you can manage. It’s better to be warm and your clothes are a mess anyways.

Frisk plops down next to you, wrapped in their own blanket. “So what happens now?” They slowly ask.

“I guess…it’s over.” You reply. Is it really over though? Just like that? Shouldn’t you feel some sense of victory or relief or…anything? “We’ll probably go home soon and everything will go back to normal.”

What exactly is normal though? You turn to Frisk. You can tell they’re thinking the same thing. Chara had been an integral part of their life, if not more so than yours. But you didn’t have any of what you had now before Chara. Sure, maybe the position at the lab would still be there. But what about Frisk, Alphys, Aria…what about Sans?

Or is normal before anyone of this? Do you go back to being a normal student with no connection to any of the people and monsters you’ve met up until now?

Is it forgetting what has happening for all this time?

“If it’s worth anything…” Frisk starts, leaning against you. “I’m happy that of all people you were the one related to Chara. Maybe if they had you before they fell…they never would have fallen in the first place.”

What an idea. You personally didn’t think you had any serious impact on Chara, but maybe Frisk has seen something you didn’t. “Maybe.” You sigh. “In a way, I guess I should thank Chara. Without them, I wouldn’t get to meet you, huh?”

“Yep. I’m pretty much the best.” They squirm around in their blanket while laughing.

You crack something of a smile. “Yeah, okay.” You snake an arm out to push them a bit. “You’ve been hanging around Sans too much.”

“You always talk about me when I’m not around?” Sans pushes open the door, smirking. You pull your head into the blanket as Aria follows him in and passes him, making sure to quickly elbow the top of his head. “Don’t be a jerk.”

“Me? Never. You know I’m only _jerking_ them around.”

You assume it’s something of a peace offering when Sans drops a plastic bag stuffed with the entire candy isle of a gas station in front of you and Frisk. You wish you had the vigor that Frisk did in their pursuit of sugary nourishment, but between getting your ass kicked by everyone today you’re just not up to it.

You realize there’s something floating in front of your face. It’s a bar of chocolate, in holographic Mettaton-themed wrapping. Sans is at the other end of it, holding it out to you but not making eye contact.

He gives it a slight shake, clearly wanting you to take it. “You like chocolate, right?”

You pause, still just watching the bar. Your silence confuses Sans, forcing him to actually venture a look.

“I like chocolate, I guess.” You finally say. “It’s not really my favorite. And I’m not really hungry.” You say softly, still holding fast to your disinterest in eating at the moment.

Frisk pops out from their barrage of sugar. “Chara likes chocolate.” They’re mumbling to themselves mostly. But the sentiment is understood.

In a way, you’re somewhat flustered Sans somehow paid attention to something about you. But of course it would be just your luck it was not really your quality. Your mouth dries up a bit.

“Sorry.” Sans withdrawals the candy in a haze of awkwardness and heads toward the kitchen, ducking in without another word.

When you pick your head up, you see Aria leaning against the door frame to kitchen. She looks completely unimpressed with the entire situation, but you can also see her clutching at her side uneasily. Stitches. You wonder if she’s more sore than she acts.

“Hey, Frisk. Undyne asked you call her after we got back. They’re already at the lab.” Aria walks toward the two you, holding out a cell phone. Frisk peels themselves away from their snacks to abide Aria’s message. They grab the phone giving Aria a worried look before headed upstairs to make their call.

Aria moves into the Frisk spot but doesn’t sit down. “Something wrong?”

You shift around uncomfortably, trying to keep a straight face. “I could ask you the same thing.” You sulk. Aria snorts. You know Aria knows what your real answer is.

She rolls her eyes. “Okay, better question. Out of all the wrongs, which is more wrong? That you’re a mopey mess despite the fact Chara is gone, or that?” Aria uses her thumb to point over her shoulder toward the kitchen. Where Sans is.

“Can they be equally the worst?” You say quietly.

Aria sort of bobs her head side-to-side, accepting that as answer. “I get it. But there isn’t anything we can do for Chara at this point.” She sighs as she watches a frown etch into your face. “And I know what is going on with you in Sans is basically in the shitter,” Aria gestures around in circles before refocusing her attention to the matter at hand. “But you have three options. You either leave it as is letting life be awkward, you forget about all of it, or you get some kind of closure. You gotta figure out what you want. Don’t think about anyone else, for once.” Aria hands you the chocolate bar Sans tried to give you earlier. “Just think about it, okay?”

Frisk, being well timed as always, comes out from on the rooms upstairs. “Can someone come with me to Alphys’ lab? Undyne said she wanted to me to help, I think.”

While you would have liked to offer to go, there were too many reasons not to. The least being you could still barely move and most being you don’t know if you can deal seeing Chara’s soul again, knowing it was doomed for destruction.

“I’ll take you, Frisk. I don’t think Chara’s up for a trip yet.” Aria shrugs, still gripping at her side but still gives you quick glances between words, daring you to tell her otherwise. Frisk nods and with a jacket much too large for them is already halfway out the door. You smile, wishing they could share a little of that energy with you.

Aria grabs her bookbag following Frisk to the door, but whispers to you before taking her leave. “Like I said before, think about it. See you later.”

After the door clicks shut, you wrap yourself a little tighter in you blanket. You study the candy bar, hoping maybe it could somehow give you the answer.

Chocolate can only solve so much.

“Hey.” You look up. Sans is across the room, still close to the kitchen. “Who left?”

“Aria and Frisk. Alphys wanted Frisk for something.”

Sans nods, rubbing behind his neck. The only sound is a light clank as bone hits bone.

“I know I’ve said this a lot in the last couple of days, but I really am sorry Chara. Shoulda done more to help you rather than hurt you. Whatever you want from here, I owe it to you.”

Hmm. Yeah. You think that’s pretty true. But you aren’t 100% sure what to do. You suppose maybe it is closure you need. Maybe you just need to say it outloud.

“I’ve never really been in a situation like this, you know?” You say. “I can’t even remember what I used to be like. I don’t know if this is something I would have ever done if it was just me all that time.”

“That’s a big vague statement.” Sans’ brow bones rises.

“I think just…everything. Coming down here, being so reckless, making crap choices…” You purse your lips and rise your own eyebrows, hoping Sans innately understands what specific events you mean.

Sans nods. “Does that mean there’s nothing now?” He’s now making direct eye contact, serious but also sad.

“I can’t tell yet. But I do know the entire situation hasn’t been…good.” You say carefully. It wasn’t terrible per say, but it certainly wasn’t the ideal either.

“Maybe…maybe we just say we’re done messing around. Maybe you learn to just be friends with just this Chara.” You try to gesture toward yourself but you’re still in a blanket burrito so you give that up.

“What do you mean?”

“Well you know, the whole time you’ve know me I was also ‘Chara’. Things about me were different, are different. You were different too. You didn’t really give a crap about anyone except all of them, right?”

Sans bobs his head in agreeance.

“It’ll sort of be like trying again.”

Sans smirks. “Sort of like…”

“I swear if you say reset.” You jokingly growl.

For the first time in what feels like forever, you both laugh.

“But yeah,” Sans grins. “Whatever you want.”

“Oh, one other thing.” You say as the laugh tapers off.

“Yeah?”

“Is there anywhere to sleep? I’m so damn tired.”

Sans gives a half smile. “Yeah. You can stay in Pap’s old room. First door at the top of the stairs. That bed’ll _drive_ you right to sleep.” Sans chuckles at what might have been a joke, but you don’t get it. “If you need anything, I’ll be in the next room over.”

Sans already has the door to what you assume is his room in this old home by the time you get up the stairs. You push open the door, and low and behold. A racecar bed.

You laugh to yourself. Of course.

It’s not exactly what you wanted to say, but you do feel a lot better. But you’re too exhausted to worry about it now. You have all the time in the world to figure yourself out again.

Maybe you would be okay.

**[OKAY. If you’re content with what happened in this chapter and are ready to move on, do not keep reading, do not scroll down, do not pass go and[PLEASE CLICK THIS LINK](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5319449/chapters/15394426) and you’ll be taken right to the next chapter!]**

**[If you’ve been waiting for smut forever, then read on ahead.]**

Or maybe not.

You sit up, wide awake, maybe an hour later.

You grind your teeth for a second. The phrase ‘whatever you want from here, I owe it to you’ and ‘whatever you want’ is blaring in your ears. You thought your way would work. And it will in time, you reason. But something was still so off. You know he didn’t insinuate it at all, but you can’t help but wonder about it. Maybe what Sans would use for coping…could you use it to actually get closer to closure?

You flop back into the bed. Are you insane? Is that something you would do?

You don’t know. So much time has passed that you’d had Chara’s soul slowly leaking into yours, always with something to say…you can’t tell what would have been going through your head now.

But this? Isn’t a little selfish?

You sit up again. Wouldn’t that just be it? It is true you’ve done so many things to try to appease everyone else…

You crawl of the bed before you can talk yourself out it. Is it stupid? Maybe. Is it a huge risk? Yep.

But last time you made a dumb choice, everything ended up fine.

Sans’ door is slightly cracked open, just a bit of dim light peeking from the bottom and the side. You don’t even bother knocking and just kick open the door before you lose your nerve.

“Chara?” You clearly startle him. Sans room is much smaller than Papyrus’. Its must darker, so much less overall than his one on the surface. “Everything okay?”

You freeze for a second. You didn’t really think this far ahead. “Uh. Can I just chill in here?”

How very apt, you groan to yourself.

“Sure.” Sans responds apprehensively. He seems awfully confused, opting to watch you carefully as you sit on the far end of the bed.

Sans continues what he was doing before, scribbling away at a stack of papers. Probably grad student stuff. The silence is incredibly uncomfortable, especially since Sans keeps glancing in your direction. You feel yourself starting to chicken out, mostly because you keep thinking of reasons you shouldn’t do anything.

But you’re mostly…curious.

You’ve gotten pretty close and it’s supposed to be good…

“Chara, are you sure okay? You keep making faces. And I’m not even telling any jokes.” Sans says, putting the papers off to the side.

Ah, that’s embarrassing. And it certainly doesn’t help that Sans situated himself in front of you, placing cool hand bones under your bangs to feel your head. “You’re not sick, right? You’re red as hell, but you’re not hot.”

“That’s not what you said before.” You mumble.

You know Sans heard you, but there’s a sense of disbelief. “What?”

You decide you don’t want to explain yourself and instead grab the lapels of Sans’ jacket, pressing your mouth against his teeth, a familiar but still strange sensation.

Sans pushes you back, both hands almost digging into your shoulders. “Chara?!” It’s not a yell as per usual, but there’s significant surprise in his voice. “What…didn’t we just talk about this?”

“Can you just…I don’t know…just humor me, okay?” Excellent reason, you tell yourself sarcastically.

“You sure you don’t have a fever? No…uh…medicine, or anything?” Sans asks slowly. His face his coated in blue. You’re first response is to make a hiccupping noise, but your voice comes quickly afterwards.

“Yeah. I’m fine. I know exactly what I’m doing.”

“You know what you’re doing.” Sans repeats after you. “Really.”

“Really.” You can feel your face heating up. “I know.”

Now whether this was a good or bad choice…it doesn’t really matter at this point.

Sans doesn’t wait for another response, before pulling you back towards him, continuing what you had started. It takes approximately 15 seconds before he snakes his tongue into your mouth as you start pulling his jacket down from his shoulders. It’s somewhat of a frenzy, Sans threading his hands into your hair while you try to match his ferocity in kisses, limbs getting caught all over the place.

As he continues to explore your mouth, he makes an attempt to pull you onto his lap, as you squirm against the hard pressure of actual bone.

You pull away for a second, bot for effect and to be more comfortable. “You really are fucking lazy.” You pant.

Sans takes the opportunity to push his face against your chest, still sheathed by your clothes. Which are sort of dirty, you remember.“Hmm?”

“You always make me sit on top. Lazy.”

Sans shrugs, pulling your shirt up. It makes an attempt to stick to you, but Sans isn’t having it. “Can’t argue with that.” He follow the course of your shirt with his tongue. His tongue shocking against bare skin. “It’s better this way. The view is a- _laze_ -ing.”

You groan, both from the joke and from the way Sans is working his mouth against your breast. “That was the actual worst.”

“Let me make it up to you then.”

Sans does something to his tongue as he drags in over your nipples and onto your sternum, hands drifting your hips to hold you down. It feels almost like electric sparks, but less painful and more…amazing. You arch into every lap, scrambling for something better than his skull to grab onto. You accidently get a rib to close to his sterum in your haze, causing Sans to yelp and yank back, bucking straight up into you.

You want to make an attempt to apologize, but the way Sans had just moved against you tempts you to grab another rib. Lucky for him, he doesn’t give you the chance shifting his hands from your hips around and under your thighs. It happens so fast in a single effortless motion, that Sans jerks you so your half way down the wall. He’s neatly situated between your legs. And at some point during this he managed to pull your jeans half down your ass.

You’re slightly disoriented from the quick flip, and now pulled down towards the end of the bed you’re not sure of heads, tails or anything in-between. “Sans?”

Sans makes a noise to acknowledge he heard you, but he’s too busy making final work of any clothes still in the way.

The tongue is no longer anywhere near your chest anymore. It’s now down where your underwear used to be, tracing far enough out of your eyesight. The surprise almost shoots your hips into the air, but Sans clearly has a much better handle on the situation than you do, holding one of your hipbones to keep you from hitting the ceiling.

“Still good?” He mumbles softly. Somewhere between the squeaking noises you’re making you’re able to convey a yes, which is good enough for him.

And really, really good for you. An entire blast of magic runs itself the entire length of your spine and in combination with the way Sans can move his mouth and tongue, shit he can make it vibrate and pulsate and every...you can taste blood from how hard your biting down on your lip to keep from screaming. Whoever was the first human who decided it was worth their time to do this with monsters made an excellent choice. You jolt back and few more times, pressing your hands into your face.

You yelp out in pain. Dammit, you forgot how fucking sore you are. “Shit.” Sans pops up, crawling over you. “Shit, was that me?”

“No.” You push a hand through your hair, trying to catch your breath. “Not from this anyways.” You flash a slick smile.

Sans smirks, pressing his face into your neck while using a knee to make sure he’s settled between you. “Think you’re funny huh?”

“You got a problem that?”

“Nope.”

And there you go, deed done. And it’s certainly not human, that’s for sure. You didn’t even get a chance to see if it even looked human. There isn’t a natural sense of human warmth, but it’s not even close to bad. It’s actually pretty fucking great.

And it just now occurred to you that Sans only ever took his jacket off.

But why worry about it now?

It’s nice that Sans is making an attempt to be nice. He’s working slowly but whatever foreign, magical appendage is inside you is twitching angrily with anticipation. You reciprocate with a breathy moan and buck into him, urging for more.

“Fuck.” Sans groans driving into you harder, the solidness of his hip hitting the flesh of your ass only makes it that much more intense. “Why didn’t do this sooner?”

“Because,” You mutter, then scream a little bit when he makes the magic dick start vibrating to the point you can’t remember what the other words to your sentence were.

Sans pulls back on your hair, exposing your neck, so he can run his teeth against it. “Because why?”

“Because you’re an asshole.”

Sans loses his strong hold trying not to laugh and his head hits your collar bone. “Nah, you’re right.” He picks himself back and slams into you one, hard. You completely melt into it.

At some point you made an attempt to bite down on Sans’ shoulder but it is indeed made of bone and that was not the best idea so you just grab on instead.

You plan on cursing but it just comes out a scream as the magic unexpectedly expands to actually fill you out. Like actually growing, and it’s a more than you could ever be ready for. “Ah! Sans! Too much!” It’s completely overwhelming.

“Fuck, give me a second.” Sans pulls away from you, and even with him trying to take the intensity off you end up going straight over the edge anyways, arching your back so hard you’re worried it might break. You’re happy no one else is in the house. You didn’t realize you could actually scream that loud.

“Hey. You okay?” Sans says quietly rolling off you, as you just kind of lie there.

You think about that for second. “Yeah, actually. I think I am.” You feel a lot better.

You sit up, searching for your lost clothes. There’s not much light in the room, but you can still see Sans’ face wrench a little. “What are you doing?”

“Going back to my…Papyrus’ room. I’m tired.”

“You’re not gonna stay here?”

You pause as you get your pants back on. That was the last curiosity you had. You don’t feel so strange anymore.

“No. I’m not. Like I said, we’re done messing around. Right?” You smile.

“I mean…yes…but we just?”

“Yep. You have to get to the end to start from the beginning again.” You reason. “Plus, it’s one and done, right?” You wink.

Sans just sort of stares at you, sitting back on the bed. “Chara, you are something else.”

As soon as you leave the room to actually sleep, you hope Sans isn’t upset but you think he gets it. But you can’t help but feel a rush from being so bad.

Maybe having a little bit of Chara left in your wasn’t all bad.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (OMG this chapter was forever long)
> 
> Was that weird? I hope I didn't mess it up.  
> It came out oddly more real than fantasy and kind of silly. 
> 
> But it was fun to write so I hope those of you made it all the way here enjoyed it.


	42. Ruin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to this chapter!
> 
> However you got here, I'm happy you made it!  
> And I hope the last chapter wasn't weird. 
> 
> But now we're here!

You suppose no matter what changes have happened in the past few month, people shouting to wake you up is just forever a part of your life from here on out.

You sit up in Papyrus’ old racecar bed, listening to Aria not just shout, but screech your name. You’re a little too groggy to full respond just yet, but her tone is quite alarming.

“Chara?!” Aria bursts into the room, smashing the door into the wall. You blink a few times, still unable to completely comprehend to situation. Aria practically launches herself at you landing maybe 2 feet away from your face, brows furred and breathing heavy.

“Uh?”

After a few seconds of assessment, Aria drops back into the bed allowing herself to curl into her bad side, groaning. “Oh thank god.” She says, exhausted. “Shit, I hate running.”

“Did…did I miss something?” You inquire just as Frisk barrels through the door with Undyne. They’re both breathing raggedly, concern plastered to their faces. Aria raises a hand with a thumbs up, which is followed by huge sighs of relief.

You’re very confused.

“Since it’s usually about me, I’m going to assume this is about me.” You quip, crossing your arms over your chest. Aria just sort of puffs out a laugh in response. Why were they so frantic?

There’s a knock at the doorframe. “An explanation would be appreciated.” Sans says, leaning against the frame. You feel a little weird, but that’s not important at the moment.

Aria sits up, no longer looking relieved. A pang of fear shoots through you.

“Chara got out.”

You can’t feel your arms, or your legs, or anything. You aren’t even sure if you’re breathing anymore.

At the same time the sound of wood cracking echos in the room. Sans managed to grab at the wall so hard he broke the doorframe. “What the fuck does that mean?” His voice is deep and reverberating with anger.

“You heard her.” Undyne turns her head away. “You’re damn smart enough to know what that means.”

“How?” Sans growls.

“It was my fault!” Frisk huffs. Now that they’ve caught their breath, they’re on the verge of tears. “It wasn’t on purpose.” They sob.

Sans takes a second to recompose. “What happened? And I’m assume you guys rushed here to make sure we only had one Chara, right?”

“Yeah.” Aria nods while looking you over again. “Just one soul. But, yeah. We had Chara in the containment thing, and Alphys was trying to get substantial power back to the lab that’s underground. Well, even further…what exactly happened again Frisk?”

“Yeah, kid.” Undyne echos. “We rushed out of there so fast, I’m still not sure exactly what we’re even supposed to be chasing after. I mean I get the jist, but…”

“I just…” Frisk wrings the end of their shirt. “Alphys wanted me to check if Chara’s soul was completely there and whole so that her idea could work. I know it was just the soul, but they looked so sad in the dark and I thought maybe if I moved them so they could at least look at some before…well before…you know…and I couldn’t move it alone and it  fell and smashed open. They just…exploded out of there! I’m sorry!”

“Frisk.” Sans doesn’t shout, but even you shake at his tone. “You can’t give everyone mercy.”

You don’t like the way Sans said that. You might not have to forgive everyone, and they may not deserve mercy but a little kindness doesn’t need to be shot down. Frisk was just trying to help.  

Frisk hiccups in response. “I’m sorry, Chara. I’m just happy you’re still okay.”

“But now we gotta find that little creep, bring ‘em back before they come back here or find someone else.” Undyne puffs. She leans over to Frisk slightly. “Right? That’s what it was?”

Frisk sniffles but nods.

“Right.” Aria says. “So we need to get looking. Frisk, you and Chara should stay here, keep each other out of trouble. Sans?” Aria leans over so she can see him. He’s still seething. “You, me and Undyne should get looking. I’ll go with you, since I don’t really know what we’re supposed to do with them if we do find them.”

“Fine.” He says curtly. “Let’s go. And you two.” You and Frisk flinch. “Don’t go anywhere. I don’t think your body can take another shock.” You nod. Probably true. “And if things go south we kind need Frisk intact to do the removal thing so…just stay put, okay?”

Together, you nod. Though you’re a little apprehensive.

About an hour later, you and Frisk and back downstairs, alone. There still isn’t much food in the house, but they’ve managed to find some noodles.

“Chara, how do you know when pasta is done?”

“You can just taste it. Or someone told me you can throw it against the wall and if it sticks it’s ready.” You make a motion of throwing something from the kitchen table.

“What?” Frisk laughs. “That’s not true!”

“I just said I heard it. Nothing else.” You shrug.

It feels nice to laugh but you can tell your forcing yourself. Your mind keeps jumping back to Chara. You remember what Aria had told you about soul on their own. Without a body or containment unit they’re too unstable, destined to fade into nothingness.

You can’t imagine what that must be like. Waiting to fade, nothing left.  

Frisk clangs a utensil against the pot. “Chara? Are you listening?”

“Oh, sorry. I guess I’m still a little groggy.”

They sigh. “I know you’re still worried about Chara.” Frisk sighs. “But we have to listen to everyone. We need to stay here.”

You run your hand through your hair. Dammit Frisk, they always see right through you. “No, you’re right.” You say half-heartily. But you need to protect Frisk too. You can’t make them do that.

So you won’t. You have a moment of revelation and plan formulating.

Frisk places a bowl of plain pasta in front of you and is about to sit with you at the table when you stop them. “Frisk, can you do me a huge favor and grab my blanket from upstairs? I’m still kinda sore.” You give them a sheepish smile.

“Oh! Sure!” Frisk chirps, already bounding of the kitchen.

You take a deep breath and silently follow them out of the kitchen, grabbing the now empty pot. It’s hard to move quickly and quietly with how sore you still are, especially up the stairs. But you manage to do it without Frisk seeing you before they go in Papyrus’ room. Once you can’t see them anymore, you slam the door shut. You hear them yelp in shock, but you don’t have time to think about it.

You smash the pot into the door handle, jamming and breaking it.

“Chara?! What was that?!” Frisk cries, running back toward the door. They jangle the knob from their side of the room. “Chara?”

“I’m sorry!” You shout back. “I can’t let you stop me and I can’t let you get hurt!”

“Chara, please don’t go! It’s a bad idea! I have to keep you safe too…” They whimper.

You put you head against the door for a second. “Frisk, if I’ve learned anything about myself in the past few days it’s that I make really bad choices. But they’re mine. And I have to try to help Chara.” You pull yourself away from the door and run down the stairs, before they get a chance to response.

You grab a black hoodie from the closet and look upstairs before heading out the door.

“Please forgive me for this.” While it was directed at Frisk, you really hope everyone forgives you in the end.

And that you’re still alive at the end of it.

You managed to get pretty far in your plan. Your new issue is that you have no idea where to go from Snowdin. Should you even stay in Snowdin town? Toward Waterfall? Or…the Ruins.

Yeah. The Ruins feels right.

That unfortunately means more snow trekking than you were hoping for. And hopefully Toriel’s dislike of anyone wandering around there hopefully ensures that no one else will be looking for Chara there. You have to keep telling yourself that once you get to the stupid Ruins you’ll be able to feel your feet again.

“E-excuse me.” You poke your head over the sentry station at the edge of Snowdin Town. The dog manning the station lets out a gruff. Not nearly as nice as the dogs from before. “Can you p-please take me to the entrance of the ruins?” You’re trying not to shiver, but at this point you just sound like Alphys. “I was t-there a couple of days ago and I dropped something of m-mine.”

The dog gives you an odd look, as well as a dog can, but agrees.

It’s a quick and silent ride in the snowmobile cart. You don’t like just sitting around because it gives you time to feel bad about tricking Frisk, doing something to put yourself directly in harm’s way, hoping that Chara hasn’t done anything either of you would regret.

The snowmobile slows to a halt. The dog cocks its head as you leave the cart. It gives rumbles a bark, pointed to the sentry station. Another dog pokes its head out, giving a curt nod. You can see another, smaller, snowmobile parked around the back.

“Oh! Yeah, it’ll probably be a while for me to find it. I can ask that dog to take me back after…” Your words fade off. You take a second to appreciate how good you’ve gotten at making up believable scenarios.

The first dog drives off without a second glance. But the second dog, you’ll have to be wary of. It’s watching you like a hawk.

You walk towards the barred off area headed to the Ruins, feeling eyes on your back. It’s okay, you muse. You have a dog. You know how to handle dogs. Maybe it won’t even notice.

You make a break for the opening the barricade, squirming through the opening. The dog at the sentry station sees you. It barrels toward you, but it’s too large to fit in the small space you squeezed through. You try your best to run, but your legs can barely muster a ragged jog. The sentry dog continues to bark and howl in a rage, angry you’ve broken the rules but you don’t have time to explain or apologize.

You figure you don’t have much time to get back to the Ruins before one of your friends find out the news that a short human ran into the Ruins alone.

You remember the trek to the Ruins not being very long, but clearly that was just hindsight bias. Or maybe you’re just attempting to get there quickly, but the continual stumbling and falling into the snow in your haste is actually slowing you down.

But you can’t stop. You’re determined to find Chara before anyone else does.

You trip to the floor as soon as you get to the deep purple stone gate that marks the start of the Ruins. Despite the pain that radiates up the heels of your hands from catching yourself, you’re happy to be out of the cold.  

You’re making a big assumption, but you personally think no one would be willing to rummage around the Ruins as the first place to look. “Chara?” You mean to shout it, but it comes out as a whisper.

This is going to be harder than you’d hoped.

That includes trying to get through all of the traps in the Ruins. And so far, not so good. You’d managed not get speared on two separate occasions, but you did get dropped another 20 feet into a pit. Yes, falling. Your specialty.

By the time you get the gates in front of the Ruin, you’re whole heartily discouraged. There’s a slight possibility you sprained at least one of your ankles and part of your hair is so matted you’re probably going to have to cut it.

“Fuck.” You mumble. You feel like an idiot. How can you just go off a feeling and think Chara would be there? You’ve looked pretty much everywhere. And they could have picked anywhere in the entire underground to go, or better yet just found someone else to thrust into the fiery pits of hell Chara hell.

You drag yourself through the carved archway. You guess someone will be there soon enough and bitch you out for making crappy choices so you might as well wait in a safe spot. That flower bed in the cavern is as good as any place to wait.  

But someone is already there. Someone you don’t know.

It’s a kid. Maybe a two or three years younger than Frisk. They’re sitting in the flower, slowly pulling the petals off from one. They examine each one before letting them fall to the floor.

You can’t help but watch for a second. They’re so small, and they look so downtrodden. Who would have left a child alone here? On second thought, how did they even get there? They didn’t look like a jumper…

You watch them for another minute, until their body starts shifting. You can’t help but gasp, catching their attention. You think maybe it wasn’t a person after all, but just a monster who can shapeshift until…they turn around. They’re closer to your age now. And they so similar to Frisk.

So similar to you.

“Chara?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys are happy.


	43. We

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The need cannot be quelled.

Back at your parent’s house, there is a television in the guest bedroom that must be at least 30 years old. The screen shows its age as the images wax and wane in pixilated, static-like streaks, distorting the pictures as it moves.

You didn’t notice from a distance, but now you see. The same phenomena is happening to the person in front of you now, making you painfully aware of how unstable Chara actually is.

And yet they’re actually in front of you. No one had ever mentioned being able to see the person who a soul belonged to. Maybe no one found it worth mentioning.

“I am the only who can do this, of course.” Chara states dryly, shifting from a more adult form to around Frisk’s age. “You really do need to control your facial expressions better. It is no challenge whatsoever to know what you’re thinking.”

You frown and shuffle back and bit.

“But that should come as no surprise. I am levels above the average, pathetic human soul.” Chara shoves their hands into their pockets tucked under an oversized yellow and green sweater, actions not matching their usual tone of superiority. “It’s as though I can make a body from magic, just like a monster.” They brag, but are interrupted by a large distortion in their body, pulling their chest away from their abdomen for a moment. “But perhaps not well enough.” They smirk.

The silence that ensues is almost painful as you continue shrink back, unsure of how to proceed. Okay, you did find them first but now what?

“You’re…not going to do anything?” You ask carefully. You are standing right there, no protection and about as beat down as you’ve ever been, completely vulnerable to Chara’s need for a host.

They shrug. “Is there a point to do such a thing? I would be separated from any soul I try to invade, so trying to put effort into a building a suitable vessel had no merit anymore.”

“Oh.”

Chara studies you for a second. It’s an extremely strange sensation, seeing them judge you from afar rather than from inside. You decide you don’t like either sensation.

“Why are you here? You look like death. The others may be completely incompetent but I do not think they would be foolish enough to send you to try and collect me.”

You take a deep breath. “I came to you look for you myself.”

Chara turns to face you dead on. “Why?”

“Well…I’m not really sure why myself.” You twiddle your fingers near your mouth. “I know Frisk was really upset about what happened. And just the thought of your soul being pulled apart…”

Chara raises an eyebrow. “So you pity me?”

You’re about to say no, but do you? Pity doesn’t feel like the right thing, but Chara’s already walking toward you. “No…I just…”

“Is that what you, nothing but a convenient blood-related host, think about me? Me?! I should think you have no position to be feeling pity for anyone else when you have been useless.” Chara growls. Their figure distorts again back into an adult form, their face wrenching darkly.

“Do you still not understand your position?” You try to move back, but hit a cavern wall. You whip your head to the side to see if there is anywhere to go, but your escape routes are already trapped between Chara’s arms.

When you turn back to face them, you lose all ability to move. The orifices in Chara’s face are burning, oily pits of blackness, searing and angry. “You dare pity me?!”

You try to respond but there’s no air left within you. Every part of you shakes as cavern wall crackled against Chara’s increased force.

And then they’re gone.

Or so you believe, only for a moment.

You’re too afraid to move for at least a minute. You wait until you’re breathing returns to an even pace before even trying to look around. But when you do, you see a small soul with what look like cracks in the otherwise solid crystal floating back to the flower bed. Once it reaches its destination, Chara’s body reforms but only to a child’s size.

They stay faced away from you. “I can only sustain a form over my own deathbed, as you can see.” They say quietly. “I could not have done anything to you even if I had truly tried. I suppose I truly am pitiable.”

“I don’t pity you.” You say weakly. “I’m just sad this is the situation. It didn’t have to be this way.”

Chara sighs. “I gave you the chance to leave. You should have just done it.”

You stare back at the cracks in the wall. “So what? You’re just trying to scare me away?”

“Despite the amount of crying you’re capable of, you do not actually run off very easily.” They shrug. “A miscalculation on my part.”

You can see a soft, dim red light eminate from Chara’s chest for an instant. “What happened to your soul?” You ask before thinking. Whatever, you have a right to ask.

“Idiot.” Chara scoffs. You take a sharp breath in. They sound so tiny. “Can you not see for yourself? It is falling apart. A soul with no purpose has no reason to keep on surviving.”

“So then…why not just let it go? Isn’t that better than being torn apart in a lab?” You respond, finally pulling yourself away from the wall. You’re still shaking a bit though. “Isn’t it?”

Chara turns around, looking apathetic. “It would have been fitting. I was reborn in the underground in a lab. It would have been appropriate for my death to come about in a similar fashion.”

“But you ran away when Frisk dropped the containment device anyways.”

“I might as well give them one last chase, do you not think so?”

“Chara.” You growl. They look at you, surprised that you would use that tone, despite how scared you still are. “You don’t want to disappear, do you? You have one purpose you’re still trying to hold onto, aren’t you?”

They chuckle. “It seems as though out souls truly did mix. You’ve become quite astute to my intension.”

“You still can’t let go of what happened with Flowey?” Your voice cracks, but you’re doing your best to stay bold. “Not that it would matter anymore.” You say sort of to yourself.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Chara’s façade breaks for a second, a hint of worry seeping through.

You kick at the ground, as few stray pebbles rolling over toward the flower bed. “Flowey’s dying. It probably won’t be long before his body is too weak from the attack from earlier in Snowdin.”

“What?” Chara almost shouts. “That can’t be…”

You grit your teeth. “Why do you even care? You hate Flowey when he isn’t Asriel and tried to kill him in this time lines and in other ones.”

“Do you really think I was actually going to kill him? I just needed him to say he would join with me and we could remold the world! If he would not agree by word, I would make him agree by force!” Chara screeches, their body almost torn apart by the outburst. As their form comes back together, Chara sighs. “But it seems such a course has only brought about the worst outcome, yet again.”

Chara looks directly at you. “Tell me something.”

You nod.

“Everything that happened to both Asriel and I…those things were solely my fault?”

You watch them as you think about an answer. Chara is manipulative, stubborn, strong-willed…but if they were a child when this all happened, could it really just be that Chara was a malicious beast? “I don’t know.” You answer. “I think you’re spiteful and angry. But I don’t think you meant to hurt the only person you actually cared about. The only family…” You take a deep breath. “Maybe you have a serious reason to hate humans as much as you do. Maybe something that was my family…our family’s fault. From the surface. I don’t think it was just you.”

Chara’s eye widen, glistening red. “I appreciate you attempt to remove blame. But I, as well as any other, can see this was a failure to the core and I am the one at fault. I have caused my own death not once, but twice now. And Asriel’s as well.”

A slow, heavy grin pulls at Chara’s face. “I really am just a disgusting human, am I not? The exact thing I set out to destroy. How pathetic.” They laugh, putting a hand to their face. “And now there is nothing that can be done for either of us. I am sorry, Asriel.” Chara pulls their palm down. “And I suppose I owe you an apology as well?”

You shake your head.

You’re about to tell Chara as long as they’ve got it figured out, it’s okay with you when something off in the distance crashes.

“What was that?” You ask, but realization quickly hits you. “Oh no.”

Chara shakes their head and smooths out their sweater. “I suppose our time together is over. Surely the ones coming will be able to return me to the lab and end my life here. I will say…thank you for being the only one to actually allow me a chance to try, regardless of the process or outcome.”

You’ve never felt Chara genuinely smile for all the months you inhabited the same body. And yet now you’re able to see it.

It’s very faint, but you hear someone call to you in the distance.

Flowey and Chara are going to die. And there isn’t a thing you can do to help either of them. You really useless alone.

Which means, if you aren’t alone…maybe you can do something.

“Chara!” You shout, just slightly startling them. They look at you in confusion, clearly meaning to have ended the conversation.

“Do you want to save Flowey?”

They stare you down for a minute and slowly nod. “Nothing can be done though.”

“We can fuse our souls!” You flail your arms for a moment. “Your soul is already breaking apart, so that mean two would can make one soul, right?”

“I believe you may have hit your head at some point.” Chara shakes their head. “or you really are an idiot.”

“Do you want to live or not?” You shake your fists. “Do you even want to try to help Flowey…Asriel? Don’t you want to save someone instead of hurt them? Even once?”

The only thing you’ve done is confuse Chara. “I do not understand. After everything I have done…why?”

You rack your brain as fast as you can. “Because if you care about at least one person you can’t be all bad! And you want to save your family…well so do I! We’re family whether you think so or not.”

You hold your hand out. Determination isn’t something you’ve always been able to have. It’s not something that was easy for you to understand in the context of monsters and human.

But now you get it. “Well?”

Your name is called again, clearer and closer than before. “Well?!”

A child’s laughter rings throughout the cavern walls. “Very well Chara. I will become part of you. I hope neither of us regrets this.”

Chara grabs your hand, hard. Their figure explodes into a pixilated mess, leaving only the pieces of their soul grabbing at your fingers, snaking up your arm.

Your soul appears, shining and trembling. As soon as it takes full shape, glistening from its own internal light Chara’s soul plunges into it. You scream, feeling a thick burning sensation from every muscle in your body as the pieces of Chara’s soul try to settle with yours. It doesn’t hurt but it almost feels like a supernova erupting from the pit of your gut, radiating out to the very tips of fingers and toes.

There’s a rush of images. Moving, trying to take shape, infiltrating your own thoughts, emotions, memories. Nothing makes sense, events flip and move out of order. You grasp at your head, flashes of light and tremors grabbing at every part of your mind, smashing two people into one.

Your knees buckle as the rush subsides.

There’s a moment of complete confusion. You don’t know where you are. You don’t know how you got there or why you’re so sore. You can’t even remember your name.

“Chara?!” Someone calls. “Chara, are you here?!”

That’s right. You’re Chara.

And not just the Chara who is a junior in university. Not just the Chara who works in a lab and doesn’t always make good choices and has really amazing friends. You’re the Chara who killed so many in many different timelines. You’re the Chara you tried to destroy the world. You’re the Chara who wants nothing more than to help Asriel.

You’re the Chara overflowing with determination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be interesting to write from here on our, since NOW TWO CHARACTERS ARE ONE HAHA.  
> And don't worry, more about why this happened will be explained. 
> 
> I apologize if anything is written wonky, my brain can only do so many things at once.


	44. One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's fun to read comments when new readers come through. It's like going on an adventure again. 
> 
> VERY ANGST about the current situation at hand.

“Chara!” Frisk runs through the gate, a little beat up from the Ruins. Though significantly less than you. That doesn’t seem to be hindering their enthusiasm, though. You’re a little surprised by that, considering you trapped them in Papyrus’ room to basically run off to your doom.

A bubble of laugher finds its way into your throat, but you suppress it. You didn’t think that was funny before.

Aria is close behind, tired but relieved.

Then horrified. She lunges forward and yanks the back of Frisk’s sweater, pulling them back towards the gate.

Aria pulls Frisk behind her, despite their confused protests. “Sans! Sans! Get over here now!” Aria screeches, looking like she’s ready to actually fight you.

You’re somewhere between scoffing and being worried. After a minute, you seem to have come to an internal agreement that you should do what you can to not provoke anyone.

“Which Chara are you?” Aria hisses.

“What?” Frisk cries, now accepting Aria as a body shield. Frisk focuses in on you, concentration seeped into their brow. Their frown grows as they come to slow realization.

You have to defuse the situation somehow, but Aria is complete hardhead. Whoa, you pause. That’s a little aggressive. Much more than something you would have thought before.

It’s strange. You can’t hear Chara at all, but you feel them. There’s feelings and thought but you just can’t fathom where they’re coming from. But they’re coming and melding with yours.

“I’m not going to ask again.” Aria growls.

You rubs the back of your head. “Do you remember back at the beginning of the year when you thought my soul was like yours? Two souls that are one?” You realize you’re looking at the floor, but you almost force yourself to look up. Aria’s and Frisk’s eyes are wide with shock.

“Chara, you didn’t…” Even though she’s visibly upset, Aria relaxes a little bit.

“What are you guys screaming about? All he echoes are giving me…a _skull-ache_.” Sans saunters in, contemplating his latest joke. He stops once he actually surveys the surroundings.

“Was that supposed to be funny?” You spit out, before getting a chance to stop yourself. “Because your attempt at comedy is really the joke here.”

Aria slams a hand over her mouth, trying not to laugh. Sans looks incredibly unimpressed as Frisk tries to figure out if they need to stop anything before it starts. You can’t decide between being proud of yourself or mortified, at least until you see a wisp of blue pool out from Sans’ eye. Now you’re a little worried.

Good to know it’s a mutual feeling.

“Guess we know who’s who, huh?” Sans smirks.

Aria puts her arm in front of Sans. “Slow down. Look again.”

Sans gives you a once over but clearly isn’t feeling patient, opting to just go ahead and pull your soul from your body.

Solid proof of your coming together with Chara is displayed before the group, as red dances wildly around the original color of your soul. It’s still a little dark, and looks as confused as you feel. But it’s warm.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Sans grits his teeth together. “What kind of bullshit is this?” There’s a burst of blue from Sans eye, but it immediately dissipates.

“Yeah.” Aria sighs. “And I doubt that trick from before could do anything for a merged soul, huh Frisk?”

Frisk nods, keeping their eyes completely fixated on your soul. “Not if they both agreed…”

“I suppose you being such a know-it-all really does come in handy, doesn’t it?” You huff. Crap. “I mean…”

“Chill out, huh?” Aria tries to keep even keeled, but you can hear the bite in her voice. “It takes a while to actually be one person again. And that’s one hell of a soul to merge with. Chara, what the hell were you thinking? Do you have idea what either of you just did?”

You close your eyes, inhaling sharply. “Yes. No. It’s just something that happened. I don’t know what will happen from here.”

You take a quick glance at Sans. Yep, clearly pissed off. You sigh. You guess it must seem like after all that trouble you just ended up picking Chara over everyone else. There is some truth to that, but not in the way it must seem to everyone.

“I wasn’t ever part of this world you guys are in.” You slowly start. “The one with monsters and magic…I’m not something special. I wasn’t like Frisk or like Chara, who were able to make their own way and actually do something. Good or bad. I was only ever a problem, someone dragged in by chance and by blood. I was never in control.”

“Chara, that’s not true.” Frisk says meekly. A deep frown is set into their face.

You shake your head. “No, that’s the truth. My existence is what started all of this, the same way your existence is what freed the monsters from the underground in the first place. But just the idea that both of us, Chara and I, were just bad endings waiting to happen...” You lose focus on the people around you for a moment. You spent a long time not wanting to feel useless or weak. Now you aren’t. “Alone, Chara and I were those bad endings. Someone dies, things are left forever unfinished. It’s asking for a reset.  But maybe together we, no, I can change something. I can stop being some weak link and start being a player.”

An image rushes through your mind. Flowey.

Flowers. Thrown room. Now.

“Chara…” Aria starts but you cut her off, forcing your soul back into your body. You start walking over. “There’s no time to figure this out, we have to go the capitol.” You bark.

You turn to Sans. “Take us there.”

The lights in his eyes pierces straight through you, but you’re unshaken.

Aria turns to face you straight on. “Why?”

“We need to go to the capitol. Flowey is going to die if we don’t.” You say, staring straight back at Sans, trying to withhold a new bout of anger, which is causing your voice to reverberate.

“Now that’s a joke.” He chuckles.

Aria’s right about the merging personalities thing. You grip your hands to your head as a stabbing pain shoots through it. It only lasts a second before you explode.

“You listen to me you trash bag of bones!” You scream, taking a complete fist full of Sans shirt. “You think you’re so fucking smart, don’t you?” You wait a second, but there’s no response. Only shock. “So then why do you fuck up so damn much? Stop being a lazy piece of shit and actually start doing something! You are going to do whatever I say, and you damn well know why!”

You feel a tug on the back of the jacket. You quickly release Sans, feeling sick to your stomach. You don’t want to look at Frisk’s or Aria’s faces. And especially not Sans.

So you’re surprised when you hear Aria laugh. “Well that was interesting. But I think we’ll deal with those issues later. Sound good?”

You nod.

“Oh.” You turn to Aria, still hanging your head low. It’s rare you have an outburst like that, but it came on so naturally. You don’t really like that. “You did take some of the experimental medication from the lab that Alphys and I were working on, right?”

Aria nods. “Yeah, I told you that already right?” She rustles her backpack.

You shrug. “Just making sure.” You turn back toward Sans. “Please,” You strain to say. “Take us to the capitol.”

Sans doesn’t say anything and just extends a hand. There’s clear hesitation for you to do so, but you grab the bones of his hand anyways. You suppose this time, you won’t be making an attempt to get away.

“Hey Aria,” You hear Frisk whisper as they walk over. “What happened before?” Aria makes some attempt to just brush it off and say they’ll talk about it later. You hope Frisk just drops it.

In a nauseating flash of light you’re in a new location. Or rather, somewhere you’ve been before. And not just when you fought Sans. You have vague memories of running in the great hall, playing under stained glass with someone. You grab at your chest.

Aria leans over and whispers. “It’s weird right? Remember something that isn’t yours to know.”

You nod. A pang strikes your chest again, the image of a small monster dances in the periphery of your vision, escaping your glances. They look like Toriel.

It must be Asriel.

You shake it off. You figure now isn’t the time to deal with this. “Can I have the medicine?” You ask Aria, but she’s already digging through her bag. You look up making eye contact with Sans. You have no idea what to feel. It’s probably a mutual feeling anyways.

“Here.” Aria hands you a vial and a capped, but empty needle. You take a deep breath.

“Chara?” Frisk, still wary but curious, walks up to you. “Is that really going to save Flowey?”

“I don’t know. But If I don’t try…”

Frisk places a hand on your shoulder. They smile. Yeah, Frisk would understand.

You don’t ask if anyone wants to come with you, already knowing exactly where to go. You also don't think anyone would come with you. In an odd way you did just betray all of them.

Aria and Frisk jog behind you, an unexpected wave of relief washing over you. Even though you technically aren’t alone, you didn’t want to attempt this as one person. 

“Not coming?” Aria directs towards Sans as you’re about to leave the room. He shrugs. “I’ll stick around here for a bit. Call if you need me, I guess.”

You turn around before leaving the room. Sans gives you an odd look, somewhat suspicious but also interested. “Thank you.” You say before turning back to the doorway.

Another long hallway. The only thing you can hear Aria and Frisk behind you. The silence besides that is deafening.

You can only feel Chara. You can’t hear them. It’s an odd feeling of oneness. It’s not like being a singular person, but it’s not like sharing either.

There’s little comfort in the extreme anxiety radiating from inside.

“We’ll be okay. We’ll do it together.” Frisk says to you, as you get the entrance to the throne room.

You nod.

That’s right. Together, you are strong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little shorter than most but it was so hard to write because I had to change both Chara's personalities and make it one somewhat cohesive personality.   
> If you're wondering why Chara doesn't have more formal speech, the souls mostly combine from the inside and don't change the host characteristics. (Also it read super weird) 
> 
> Hope you guys liked it!


	45. Sacrifice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hey! 
> 
> I told you I was going to keep at this, even if it took me a long time!  
> I've just been insanely busy you guys but I kind of have some semblance of my life back and some time to do what I want.

“Hey. Chara? Are you alright?” Frisk pulls at your sleeve. You realize you’ve stopped in front of two dark, silvery, massive doors engraved with the insignia of monsters. A vague memory tells you you’ve never seen those doors closed before. You frown.

You take a second to recompose, an action you would have ever found so simple to do on your own. You reposition the grip you have the shaft of the syringe, feeling the weight of the liquid inside. “Yeah.”

Aria raps her knuckles against the door, causing a soft echo the rumble down the hall. “So is Flowey just half dead in there? And he is really in there, right?”

“Probably. To both.” You pull back an emerging sneer. You’ll have to be more aware of your newly changing body language and that you can’t allow Chara’s predispositions overtake your own. “It’s still just a feeling.”

“What are we waiting for, then?” Frisk asks quietly.

You make a move to enter the throne room but the doors are as heavy as they look. Even with the additional effort provided by Aria and Frisk, the door barely budges a few inches with every heave. Every push seems more and more futile, sending waves of doubt through you. Maybe your gut feeling was wrong. There really was no basis for you to think Flowey would even be here.

With a gap barely large enough for Frisk to even stick their hand through, the doors fly open knocking the three of our forward toward the stone floor. Luckily the fall is broken by some type of foliage.

Dead foliage.

This room is supposed to be filled with the vibrant yellow flowers which someone manage to grow with no sun. There should be soft green of grass under your hands. There should be thick vines creeping across the stone floor, climbing up the walls around the edges of the doors.

That can’t be right, you think as you crinkle some dull yellow petals trying to get back on your feet. This room was supposed to be so well taken care of by Asgore, and despite the years away from the Underground you doubt it would have become like this.

“What happened in here?” You hear Frisk whisper, taking their time to stand back up.

Aria’s already on her feet to you. She motions her head toward the center of the room, face wrenched in disgust. You swallow hard, not sure if you’re ready to see. But you figure together or alone, you would never be ready.

Frisk gasping doesn’t make it any easier to raise your head. You do it anyways, and feel your stomach hit the floor.

Flowey is curled around the throne, soft white light slowly being pulled from the already drained flora. There’s black sludge forming in a pool near the base of the throne where the flowers have melted into oblivion, as crumbling dark vines twist and slink through the liquid and back up toward Flowey. He jerks and twitches, once yellow petals now deathly white and withering on the tips. His face shifts between pain filled grimaces, empty grins, and one with large protruding fangs and blood red eyes.

You can’t stop your voice from pouring out. “Flowey!”

He looks over weakly. But he’s not really looking. It’s an empty stare, eyes looking right past you focused on nothing. He shifts them back and forth for a moment, possibly taking in his new environment or maybe just moving instantly.

“Shit, he’s so far gone. Are we too late?” Aria’s voice is slightly muffled past her hand which encircles her mouth.

“He’s not dead yet.” You spit.

Aria glares without turning her head. “Maybe not the body but…Frisk?!”

Frisk screeches. You turn on your heel, just in time to see Frisk lifted from the ground, blackened vine gripped around their ankles. You start moving toward them, shouting illegibly until you hear something thump behind you. You whip your head back, watching Aria get dragged across the ground by a similar sickly looking vine. Both of their souls emerge, flashing in a panic as Flowey mindless pulls them closer to the throne.

“Flowey stop!” You scream, hurling yourself towards him. Maybe if you get the serum in him he’ll regain consciousness from whatever is happening. But you’re afraid. You’re terrified of being caught in a tangle of vine.

You’re afraid but determined and you certainly don’t want to die. But no feeling knows what else to do. You just have to trust what’s inside.

Your plan goes awry as you’re whipped in the chest, flung back into the stilled closed metal door. Your back smashes into it and you drop to the ground, the wind completely knocked out of you. You curl into yourself trying to keep from passing out from the pain.

You can get up on your knees after a minute or so, but the pain from being thrown like a rag doll is still overwhelming. Frisk is being hoisted faster than Aria is being dragged, but you notice a trail of blood seeping in a trail from her.

“Chara!” Aria screams between labored breathing. She starts to say something else, but another vine wraps around her torso, cutting straight into her where her stitches are. Instead she just writhes in agony. Frisk struggles against their captor, but the more they do, the more they’re engulfed by angry vines.

Flowey just stares blankly through a hollowed smile, fangs bared. He can’t hear you, you know that. And if you keep running at him, you’ll get killed. He must be on the edge of animalistic, a monster on the verge of death with nothing left but instinct trying to take whatever magic he can to stay alive. But something strikes you as odd. He’s keeping you at bay, not trying to take you.

You pray there’s still something left inside him that remembers, that knows. But now isn’t the time. You watch sight of Aria’s and Frisk’s souls. They’re starting to dim out. You panic, they’re dying.

Despite the bitter taste in your mouth you turn down towards the hall.

“Sans!”

Silence.

“Sans, please! I need help!”

Nothing, but your own voice desperately echoing back at you.

Could he even hear it? Or was he ignoring you? Did he stay behind knowing you were leading everyone to their deaths? Was this punishment for becoming part of the ruthless, spiteful Chara? Or was it because of who you were before…

You get up, deciding to rush Flowey again. Maybe you can get to a vine, something to slow him down, to stop your friends from their souls being drained away.

You have no idea how fast you’re moving. Your vision is tunneling, focused on a single free vine, snaking towards Frisk. You can only hear your heavy, pained breathing in your ears. You can hit it, you can.

It notices you. There’s no time to backpedal. It speeds toward you, ready to strike. You cover your face, bracing for impact.

But it never comes.

Instead, parts of the wall knock into you. It hurts, but it’s not enough to knock you off your feet. Brick tumbles at your feet, coated in electric blue light. The whole room glows blue.

“Sans!”

He doesn’t respond, no joke or quip. He’s perched atop one of his monstrous animal-like skulls, smoke dribbling from its mouth. Bones with speared edges slash at the vines entrapping Aria and Frisk, freeing them without too much hassle. Two smaller skulls collect their limp bodies before he fires a blast in Flowey’s direction. He’s able to protect himself from most of it, but you can tell he took some of the hit as he curls back, withering even further.

With a moment of silence, Sans jumps from the skull and approaches you. “Are they…?” Your voice cracks but your face remains stoic as the small skulls lower Frisk and Aria to the floor.

“No. They’re alive, barely.” He says.

You can hear Aria gargle a bit, lifting her hand into the air.

“What the hell are you made of?” Sans sighs. “Not important. Shut up and don’t move.” He pushes Aria’s blood soaked hand back down.

Frisk is barely conscious, trying to reach for you. You push their hand back down, following Sans’ lead.

Sans quickly uses part of Aria’s shirt to at least cover her reopened wound. He stand up, wiping the excess blood onto is shorts. “Alright. Let’s get this over with.”

Flowey is already starting to pull vines back around him, eyes alert but lifeless.

You grab at Sans’ jacket. “Wait. Sans. Don’t kill him yet. Please.”

“What? Are you insane? Wait, what am I saying? Of course you are, now.”

You scowl. “Would you listen to me? If I can use this maybe I can still save him!” You shove the syringe up towards him.

Sans drags a boney hand over his face. “No, it can’t Chara. It never could.”

You freeze. “What?” You shake your head. “But…it’s made to heal monsters…we’ve been working on this almost a year.”

“Chara, use your brain. I know the smart one is still in there. It’s meant to heal monster souls.” Sans shakes his head. “Flowey has barely enough left to be considered a monster at all.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” You whisper, anger shaking in your voice. “Why did you just let me walk in here thinking I could save him?!”

“How the hell was I supposed to know this would happen?” He motions the entire scene, bodies on the floor, Flowey struggling to get enough energy to move, you barely able to stay standing. “I thought you’d come in here, inject a practically dead monster, he would die anyways and that would be the end of this shit show.”

You think for a second. In reality, that’s what you expected as well. Just that Flowey lives instead of dies. Gears continue to whirl in your head, pieces coming together. Right. Souls are the key.

You face Sans head on. “Then do me one last favor.” He cocks his head. He won’t agree until you tell him what you want to do, you know that. You present the syringe to him.

“You said Flowey needs more soul for this to work right? And Flowey told me he had been collecting small fragments of souls left behind from humans to survive. I have an idea. If this works, please save him. If not, then save Aria and Frisk.”

“Chara, are you fucking joking?”

You shake your head and smirk. “That’s your job isn’t it?”

Sans stares at you for a good second. He’s trying to see if there’s a separation between you and Chara still. But there isn’t. “You got me. I don’t know what you’re going to do but I just can’t win.” He shrugs and takes the needle. There’s a part of you that wants to cry in relief, while the other is solely focused on the task ahead.

“I know you’re _dying_ to get out there but you don’t get the option of not coming back.” Sans’ smiles half heartily as you start running towards Flowey.

At least this time you’re both vouching on everyone living.

Flowey is still struggling to survive. That’s all you can call it. He’s not fighting to kill. Unlike you had tried to do before. Unlike he had tried to do once upon a time. He doesn’t want life to prove a point or to prove himself. He just wants to live.

And you owe him that more than any one else.

Your soul emerges as you approach Flowey, just as you expected. You think you see a flash of something…anything, but maybe it’s just you hoping hard. Without becoming one person, doing this would be completely impossible. You wouldn’t know how to make this happen and Chara wouldn’t have had the power on their own. Either of you would probably die from the shock, from the loss.

Burning with determination you focus on your soul. It takes away from the vines crawling their way toward you. It hurts. It hurts more than being tossed across the room, more than falling into the underground, more than anything you could ever remember.

The crystalline pattern of your soul, neatly settled in front of you, cracks slightly. Just on the upper edge, no more than the size of a grape. But to you, it feels like the entirety of your soul is being ripped to shreds. You can tell something is happening behind you, shouts of confusion and possibly light. But it has to be this. Flowey needs magic to live, he needs a soul. Even if it’s a tiny piece of yours.

The small piece of your soul reforms into a little ball of light. Your breaths are shallow and pained but you stay up in time to watch thin vines devour the bit of soul you’ve shared. You could spare some between the two you anyways.

You start to drop. You just don’t have the strength to stay awake anymore.

But finally, together, you might have actually SAVED everyone.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys like this chapter, it actually went through a lot of phases before it became this.
> 
> Also for everyone who read through for their first time in one big chunk, it' a lot of fun to read your comments as you go. It's like going on the adventure all over again for me haha.


	46. Awake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHH I wanted this out on the 15th! GAH.   
> HAPPY ANNIVERSARY :')
> 
> But I was on call this week, nothing could be done.   
> Anywho, spending a month on my ICU rotation was very helpful for this chapter.

It’s hazy. You can tell people are moving around you from time to time, but you don’t know who. You can hear voices directed towards you can barely make out words. Someone asks you if you’re hungry at some point. You don’t know, but you find you can’t answer even if you wanted to.

Your throat burns. You cough. You choke. But you can only just gasp at the edge of consciousness.

Has it been minutes, hours? You have no idea.

You’re not sure how long it’s been, but you can tell you’re somewhere with a window. You can see blue sky. 

A window?

Blue sky?

But how?

You jerk up, realizing you’ve been laying down. You’re yanked back by something constricting your face, wires and tubes snaking over you. Panicked beeping fills the room scaring the absolute shit out of you, inducing more screeching noises.

“Hey, someone come help she woke up disoriented.”

“Calm down hun, we’re here to help.” 

“Breath for me, in and out, in and out.”

The realization comes slowly. It’s a hospital. You’re in a hospital.

How did you get there?

Your question is quickly pushed from your head when an older gentleman with a stethoscope around his neck walks in without an inch of worry on his face. Probably a doctor. The people around you are clad in blue scrubs, you assume the nurses, allow him to pass through and check whirling machines and flashing screens above you.

“Hey there Chara. I’m the critical care doctor. Do you know where you are?”

“Hospital.” You gurgle, your throat burning as you speak.

He nods. “Good girl. Do you know why you’re here? And you can just nod or shake your head, being intubated really does a number on your throat.” He gives you a soft smile.

You shake your head letting out a small sigh. All you can remember is breaking your own soul for Flowey. You might wait to tell the doctor that though. No reason to end up in a psych ward, right?

“Apparently you fell into the Underground. Your friends were fairly vague about what happened, but you were severely dehydrated, fatigued, with some serious fractures. You went into respiratory distress and we’ve had you sedated for about two days now.”

“Two?” Your words are cut off by a coughing fit. One of the nurses urges you to not speak yet, just give it some time. You’re not really into that. You have a million questions.

What happened? Where is everyone? Are they okay?

What happened to Flowey?

You didn’t have too much more time to ponder that because your parents had already muscles themselves into the room.

A day and half later you’d been moved to the floor, stabilized which you hope means they’ll let you eat soon. You’re hungry enough for two.

You cringe at your own joke.

There’s a gentle knock on the door, so you scramble to sit yourself up. It’s a challenge due to the large cast climbing from your wrist almost to your shoulder and the binder protecting a mass of broken ribs. A nurse pokes her head into the room, looking a little disturbed. “You have some guests. Are you okay to see any one yet?”

“I suppose.” You say somewhat dryly. You didn’t mean to sound that way.

She scrunches her face a bit and lets in your visitors.

It’s Aria and Sans. Aria is what you would describe as a walking mess on crtuches, ankle in a huge black boot and bandages up to her elbows on both arms. She’s in slouchy clothes rather than a gown like you, but you can see a fluid drain poking out from where her original stab wound must have been. Sans looks mostly fine, except he has the hood of his jacket pulled completely over his head, so much so, you can barely see his face.

“Not too keen on skeletons walking around the hospital, huh?” You rolls your eyes.

Sans shrugs. “At least I can walk.”

You still can’t see his face but you know he can the scathing look you’re shooting him.

“As fun as this already is,” Aria grunts, “How are you feeling, Chara?”

“Never better.”

Aria whacks the side of your bed with a crutch. “Don’t be a smart ass.”

You laugh. It hurts you face, but it feels good too. “I’m mostly happy I didn’t drop dead after doing what I did. What happened after that anyways?”

“Uh, well…” Aria glances at Sans.

“Teleporting the three of you at once to the entrance of an ER probably fucked you up worse than it needed to but there wasn’t much choice at that point. Luckily for you the throne room is so close to opening to the surface so I could at least do it. Otherwise, who knows.” Sans picks his head up enough so the lights in his eyes bore into you. Maybe it was your fault, a little bit.

“It was kind of funny to watch the ER staff freak out when a skeleton brings in three half-dead people.” Aria laughs dryly. “Oh, but it was so not fun when Toriel got here.”

“Speaking of, where is Frisk?” You want to ask about Flowey as well, but it’s probably not that right time.

“Downstairs, on the pediatric floor. They can’t walk around yet, broken leg and ankle.” Aria sighs. She sees that your face falls into a frown. “Don’t worry too much, you know Frisk, they’re staying determined of course. Oh! That reminds me, I’ll be right back.” Aria tries to swing herself around but she’s significantly slowed. She cusses a few times, before Sans gets the point to hold the door open.

You shift uncomfortably as Sans sits in one of those minty green colored arm chairs. He stares outside for a little bit, like he’s trying to remember something. “So, you really did merge with Chara, huh?”

“Yes.”

“Any particular reason?” With Sans’ hood still up you can’t see any expression from where you are.

You think about it for a minute. “I didn’t like the idea of just letting Chara or Flowey just die. After all this time, they never really got a chance to fix what happened. But I also think, in a strange way, we both needed what the other had.” You bring your knees up your chest very carefully.

Sans stays quiet for a second. “Yeah. Maybe.”

“Not too fond of who I’ll be now?” You cock your head. There’s a strange swirl of emotions happening, directly opposing each other, but you remain stoic. You’re curious about it.

“You were good before.” Sans says. You flinch. “But you’ll be fine this way too. One of knows how to be a good person. Couldn’t be all bad.”

“A compliment and an insult at the same time. Thanks.”

“Just trying to throw you a _bone_.”

You groan and put your head into your knees. “I suppose there is pain worse than death...well almost dead anyways.”

Sans makes a noise, probably trying not to laugh.

Before you get a chance to think any further about it, you can hear scrambling at the door. Aria is struggling to get the door open, presumably a challenge with the crutches but you can hear there’s someone else with her. Who else could possibly with her that couldn’t open to door?

“Why didn’t you just get a nurse to help? They’ll help!” You can’t tell who that is.

“No, we’re fine. I’ve got it.” Okay, that one is Aria.

Sans shakes his head and gets up. You can’t see from around the corner but you hear the door open and a very hushed conversation that ends quickly.

Aria hobbles in and plops herself into the chair while Sans follows behind holding a single, melancholic-looking yellow flower in a pot in one hand.

“Flowey?!” You practically launch yourself out of the hospital bed, almost falling directly to the floor, but Sans pushes you back with a thin veil of magic. You struggle against it, but the sensation of falling mixed with pain and the sheer excitement of moment makes you want to vomit. 

“Chara!” Flowey shakes, almost falling out of Sans’ grasp. “Ah! Put me down already!” He bites, as Sans shakes his head.

Sans places Flowey onto the sink countertop, probably a little more roughly than you’d appreciate. You pull yourself back on the bed, trying to calm yourself down before your quickly increasing heart rate causes unneeded attention.

There’s a long stretch of silence. You’re still trying to determine if you’re actually awake and seeing things as they are, as Flowey awkwardly presses two leaves together.

Aria presses her hand to her face. “Flowey, you’ve literally been practicing talking to Chara all day with Frisk.”

“What! I wasn’t! Don’t rush me, you’re so nosy.” Flowey grumbles, pouting to himself.

“Humans sure are a pain, huh? They should just _leaf_ us alone.” Sans points finger guns in Flowey’s direction. Aria presses her fist into Sans’ skull.

You sit back, overwhelmed. “So, it worked?” You press your hands against your face, which stings here and there. You wonder if you should see what your soul looks like, but you’re somewhat terrified to look. It can’t be any worse than what you look like right now, probably.

“Um, sort of.” Flowey sways a bit. “You gave me a big chunk of your soul, and Sans was able to use some medicine stuff to keep me from turning into dust or a worse monster. I don’t know what I would have been.” He shudders. “Again.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Aria gritting her teeth. She had been part of Flowey’s stronger version, after all. Having to deal with Flowey omega may have been worse that what you dealt with.

“But,” He takes a deep breath. “Even though I don’t have a complete soul, I sort of feel the way I did a long time ago. I’m able to live again thanks to the sacrifice you made. Especially the Chara from the surface. I think I really owe you.”

You shake your head. “I don’t believe so. It was…an apology of sorts. I was always too stubborn, too fixated to realize what happened was my fault. My hate was strong and I used you.” You smile softly. “We can call it even.”

It hurt inside. It hurt to admit this was your doing from the very benninging. You had taken on that responsibility, all of the children who were sacrificed was because of you. From Asriel to the six souls to every monster who died in any timeline. It would still be a long time before you could fully process accepting that but it was a start.

 “Are you sure?” Flowey looks away. “One of you did nothing wrong. You just got dragged in.”

“It’ll take a long time for me to figure it all out, but I think the only way for reconciliation was it to happen this way.”

Beyond all the darkness and terror you had created, maybe it was something as simple as this that you had wanted all along.

“So what happens now?” Aria asks, crossing her good leg over her bad one. “Is it over? It’s hard to think about it that way.”

“Not quite.” Sans says. “There’s still a few people that need to be let in on exactly what’s been happening. And once Chara is out of the hospital, you two kids are going to have to deal with your parents.”

Oh. Oh.

Now that you are Chara and they’re you…you suppose that would mean you have two sets of parents. A wave of dread passes over you, a sentiment you can tell is shared with Flowey by the expression he’s making.

Toriel would be one thing. You had always figured she had an idea what was going on. She wasn’t one to stay blinded even if she stayed quiet.

But Asgore would be another story.

This calls for a whole new type of determination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I think I only have two or three chapters left....we're almost to the end??  
> Ahhhh. 
> 
> Apologies for any serious mistake. Thanks for reading!


	47. Return

Your mom helps you into the car. A fresh layer of clean, white snow separates you from the vehicle, an obstacle much more challenging than perceived. You’d been in the hospital almost a week, resulting in a good outcome as stated by the staff. You weren’t really convinced of that, as a foot of snow might as well have been a mountain.

You’re leaving with a lot more than you had come with, including Flowey. The fact you had acquired a new appendage essentially overnight wasn’t lost on anyone, but no one really wanted to ask about it.

You mom places a worn, brown duffle that she dug up from who-knows-where in your family’s house in the back seat as you tentatively climb into the passenger side managing to bang your arm against the side despite your efforts. Just your luck, really.

“So, he’s a permanent fixture I’m guessing?” Your mom pulls herself into the driver’s side, eyeing Flowey. He shifts uncomfortably, so that he faces the window. You figured if anyone would eventually ask it would be your mom.

You mumble in agreement. Earlier in the week when your parents pressed you for what happened in the Underground, they just barely managed to respect that you didn’t want to talk about it. With the same limited information you’d given at the hospital, you’d figure ‘psychotic break’ was as good of a reason as any. You could see they felt somewhat betrayed by your silence but you didn’t see any other way as thing were right now. You’d probably have to tell them eventually all things considered. But how could you even explain it?

“Are you feeling well enough to go back to school?”

You nod. “School should be fine.” Social life? Being friends with people again? Figuring out how to be a person at all? Probably not. But academics would be alright.

“You sure? You haven’t really seemed like yourself sweetheart. I know this must have been hard but still.” You mom nervously raps her fingers on the steering wheel. You glance down at Flowey, who’s taken on an uncharacteristic silent mood. She’s not wrong, an obvious thing to you. You wonder who else might notice.

Of course you learned that it might be a rough transition from Aria while in the hospital. She made it a point to talk to you and Flowey about how your personality and Chara’s would eventually be forced to merge into one entity. Even though your souls were ‘merged’ your minds and personalities were still somewhat separate. Aria said it was kind of a slow process at first, which is why there wasn’t a lot of change in your regular habits and actions but you felt completely different inside. Supposedly it was going to get weird…but you don’t know about that. Aria said you would feel out of control, almost like a psychosis, whatever that meant. Apparently Flowey was prepped for it.

“Chara?”

“Oh, yeah. Sorry. I’m just tired.” You do your best a convincing smile.

“I would say so! Being so long in the hospital. Really, now.” You mom shakes her head dramatically and continues on about how she’ll have you home during your next break to make sure you’re ‘as perfect as a peach’. Her words, not yours.

You don’t realize how nervous you are when your mom pulls up to your apartment building. Interacting with your parents was one thing, but your roommates would be a very different situation. They knew something had been up all this time. You figured they would never guess what though.

“And you sure you don’t want to come home?” You mom makes a last ditch effort, but somehow giving up on this school year seemed like it would have meant you really did let all of this get the better of you.

“You don’t have to worry so much. I’ll be alright.” You jostle the bag and Flowey around, hearing him cuss under his breath when he goes almost horizontal. What can you do? Your arm and ribs are still broken, after all.

After finally getting your mom to go home, you turn your attention to your apartment. “Just don’t drop me.” Flowey huffs.

“Don’t be such a crybaby. You’re fine.” You roll your eyes. It was a long time coming for you and Flowey to be in each other’s presence. You tried to explain what happened before you arrived in the Underground as he tried to give you clearer view of the past, but it was a failed attempt each time. It was still just too strange. The only rule you had managed to actually establish with this situation was that as he is now, Flowey will be called Flowey.

The outburst in the hospital after you called him Asriel anyways was bad enough.

“Anyways,” Flowey wags his head back and forth. “Are you going to tell your roommates about everything? You still didn’t say so. Also, do I really need to remember who’s who?”

“Yes, you need to remember. We are working on being good, right?” You drop your bag at the top of stairs to take a break.

“Who would have thought we’d both be the epitome of evil in the Underground, huh? And that you’d drag yourself into it. Does that make sense? Mom and dad sure are going to proud of us.” Flowey injects sarcasm into as many words as he sees fit. But you’re more worried about that whole, mom and dad bit.

You didn’t meet with Toriel directly in the hospital. Because of that, it was the only time Undyne and Alphys came to visit. You were surprised to see Alphys at all, but they only had a message to pass along. You, Flowey and Aria were to meet with both her and Asgore at the end of the month to discuss what happened since the hospital was deemed an inappropriate place to have your asses chewed out.

“Why not just shout about to it everyone? How incessantly annoying.” You grumble to yourself, picking up your bag again.

“That sounds more like the Chara I know.” Flowey grins mischievously as you roll your eyes. You’re not sure about that. You’ve lost the feeling of ‘different’ Charas.

But not strange symptoms. Maybe Aria just experienced something differently than you will.

You’re unsure of what to do with yourself when you get to the front door. You had minimal contact with your roommates, mostly because you weren’t sure how to explain this situation to them. That probably made it worse in the long run, but then it seemed like fitting solution at the time.

You wondered if putting off things you didn’t want to deal with was a better solution than just making rash decisions.  

Before you could get your keys out, the knob jangled and the door was slowly pulled open. Caroline’s worry-stuck face poked out from behind the crack, big eyes wet with fat tears.

“Caroline we talked about this!” You heard Dena cry, footsteps thumping from inside the apartment.

It was too late though. Caroline had already launched herself out from behind the door, sobbing about how worried she had been about you and how much everyone was afraid for you. Dena and Mercedes followed her out, trying to keep her from knocking you and Flowey over. The most that was managed was that somehow Mercedes ended up in position of Flowey and you slumped to the ground, Caroline’s arms linked around your waist.

It was really uncontrollable, the tears. You weren’t feeling particularly sad or elated, but you were crying alongside Caroline none the less. It was like there was no connection between emotion and thought. Of course, right now is when you’d get your merged personality symptomatology. You tried to explain and apologize through tears, but Flowey had to translate for you. It was apparent Flowey was stressing out Mercedes, but she managed to stay composed well enough and not hurl him over the bannister. Dena was quick to get everyone inside after that.

“Chara,” Dena didn’t turn from the door as it clicked shut. Everyone else filed around the coffee table. “I don’t really understand what’s going on. We’re really happy you’re okay and we really want to know what happened…but if you don’t want to tell us that’s okay too.”

You settled yourself onto the floor in lieu of trying to climb into an actual seat. “I think she would need to think that over.” Flowey says, leaves folded one over the other.

Dena scowls slightly. “I get you’re some kind of monster, but who are you again?”

“I’m Flowey the flower.” Flowey twitches and shrinks back a bit. “Uh, it’s a little complicated beyond that. And…I’m not really sure where I fit into all of this.” He glances over to you, but your current state is unfavorable for ultimate decision making.

But that’s never stopped you in the past. You’ve delayed enough. “I don’t think I can tell you guys effectively. I don’t think I completely understand all of it on my own.” You shiver hard, but it’s not cold. You immediately feel like you’re overheating.

Your roommates give you tentative stares. You take a deep breath. “But I’ll tell you. And I’ll tell you now, otherwise I might change my mind.”

While your roommates look relieved, Flowey grunts in protest. You shrug. Despite the increasing friction caused by the merging of your souls, you still needed to trust the people who had proven themselves already. You wondering for a second if you should have Aria help explain, but you needed to start relying on yourself for a change.

The only person besides her who could explain would have been Sans.

But you hadn’t heard from him since that first day you were stable in the hospital. Neither had Aria or Frisk. No one had.

It’s hard to find a place to start. You explain the changes in your personality, the realization you contained two souls. When questioned, Flowey chooses to extract Caroline’s soul as an example. While a harmless gesture, there was a good 20 minute uproar afterwards. For a split moment, there was a sense of normalcy but it was gone as soon as it was appeared.

Once settled, you explain the happenings in the lab, the liquid LV, the determination injections, everything. You talked about how the relationship formed because of this second soul, how between that and working with Alphys you had managed to wedge yourself into a complicated drama of the monsters and the human child from the Underground.

Dena, Mercedes, Caroline, and Flowey listen without saying anything from that point on. You can see confusion, contempt, and sadness pass over Flowey’s expressions, if only just enough for you to notice. It stings, even though you’re unsure about where the emotions are directed at. You can only grab at the few times he looked like he truly understood.

Throughout the explanation, your forced to stop due to uncontrollable crying fits, moments where your voice vanishes, or angry outbursts. You feel like you’re getting more detached from any control you once had, as you explain, a side effect of two souls becoming one. You do your best to recount the events in the Underground on your own, leaving out some less than appropriate details. Especially of the past timelines where they died. You try to explain your rationale for your choices, but there isn’t a lot. Most of it was just an intangible feeling.

It takes a long time. You don’t even bother to look at the time. But the end of your tale, all that’s left is silence.

Mercedes is the first one to move. She stands up, heading over the door. “I’m going to take a walk.” She grabs her coat and leaves without another word.

Dena sighs and follows Mercedes out. “I think,” Caroline says slowly. “I still don’t really understand everything. And that is happened right under our noses and we never knew to help.”

“I had no right to drag anyone into this, especially all of you.” You state attentively.

Caroline looks like she’s going to say something, but chooses not to.

Maybe it was just a moment. But it felt like an eternity of silence until Caroline got up and went to her room.

You place your chin on the coffee table, feeling Flowey pat your head. You feel like this is the first in a long string of broken relationships that were about to start snapping. It was a heavy feeling, but you were too exhausted to contemplate just how hard it would be to rebuild.

“If it counts for anything, you’ve got me.” It almost sounds like he’s saying it to himself rather than to you.

There was some solstice in that.

It turned out to be truer than you thought.

Your roommates slowly came about, but there was a strict tension that still existed. You could tell Mercedes and Caroline wore their blame on their sleeves, but Dena was harder to read. They did their best to act normal, but you knew they were hurt for themselves at for you. Flowey’s presence also wasn’t particularly helpful. She did say that time would be what helped everyone. You hoped she was right.

Alphys sent you a blunt email you weren’t to return to your lab assistant position until after your meeting with Asgore and Toriel. It was a harsh slap in the face, but you figure Sans or Aria must have given her the general rundown of the events in the Underground at some point and you couldn’t blame her for wanting you to stay as far away as possible.

Aria was thrust back into her classes, and while she tried to keep some type of communication, she just couldn’t. It was also incredibly hard to make conversation. It made you realize how many of your similarities were really due to this whole Underground business.

Frisk sent you a single text message about being grounded and hoped you could talk later that month. You didn’t know what to expect for that one.

Despite Flowey’s protest and a nagging feeling not to, you tried to text Sans a few times. You made no attempt to actually say anything just yet, but you never got a response. You wondered a few times about maybe trying to ask Papyrus when you saw him around on campus, but you had no right to pry.

You honestly believed there would be no salvaging that one. You weren’t sure that there was a reason to with such conflicting feelings.

The end of the month couldn’t come fast enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a very angsty chapter, I feel. But I'm not a fan of loose ends and this hopefully helps get me to the point where there aren't many.  
> I hope it wasn't bad.

**Author's Note:**

> Be kind my friends, it's my first fic in over 7 years and Undertale has completely destroyed me. And forgive, I have no idea how this site actually works. Good luck me.  
> Please, please be patient with me. I started writing this as a stress reliever but my life is insanely busy all the time but I'll do my best to keep up.  
> I have a few chapters written out but would like to hear ideas and opinions. Turns out this is gonna be kinda shippy.  
> I'm really enjoying writing this and I hope you guys enjoy it too!
> 
> http://starshooterx.tumblr.com/


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